Dabny Vs. Everything, One

Its been a long while since I’ve attemped a story consisting of multiple chapters. Sooo, here’s the first of a few chapters of a new and mildly exciting story.

The rent was cheap and the cookies were good. Life really didn’t get much better. Though if it did, it would require the presence of a fog machine and strobe lights, Dabny always figured.

Dabny Penoir, aged about 22 years in the suburban jungle she called home, was living life just a little bit better than most. A rented apartment in the basement of an older woman who obviously had never rented to anyone before was an extreme blessing.

Did landlords typically bake cookies for their renters? Likely not.

Chocolate chip, on this occasion.

Dabny brushed away some of the crumbs from her computer desk and checked her profile at PeopleSpace. Nothing new happening, apparently. Time to check the email. Nothing new there. Time to check WayHotMusicNews. Nope, nothing new there.

Not much left to do but to bask in the glow of homemade cookies, then.

There was a knock at her door. This was a rare occurrence, with the exception of Mrs. Ellerby, as nobody ever visited.

She opened the door widely without even hesitating to observe who it might be. It was not Mrs. Ellerby. It was a man she had never seen before.

This guy, though, she could already tell was a bit strange. He was very tall, firstly. Maybe about six and half feet tall. He was bald, and it was quite possible that there wasn’t a single strand of hair on his entire body. As if that wasn’t strange enough, he was wearing a black spandex-like suit that went from his toes up to his neck. His arms and hands were even enveloped in the suit. His whitish pasty neck and head gleamed in the sunlight.

“I don’t think I know you,” was all Dabny could muster.
“Likewise, I don’t think you know me either,” he responded in a soft tone.
“Well…can I help you?”
“Possibly.” He continued to stare at her, unblinking, while his body remained completely motionless.
“And, how is it I could help you?”
“I’m looking for someone.” Again, he stared at her, without elaborating.
“Right, ok. Who?”
“Well, that’s me,” she replied, with a confused squint of her eyes. This man was easily the most bizarre person she’d ever met
“That is excellent news to me.”

There were a few moments of complete silence between the two of them.

“So, do you care to tell me what you’d like to talk about?”
“Yes, I would.”

Another moment of silence.

“Alright, well, whenever you’re ready to talk, I’m ready to listen,” she said, with a slight bit of sarcasm.
“Very well, thank you, Dabny. Allow me to prepare a moment for myself so that I may present my business to you in the best manner possible.”

The man stood motionless for another moment before beginning to shake violently in his place. His entire body rumbled as if it were being subject to an earthquake that was taking place immediately under his feet.

“Are you…ok?” she asked cautiously.
“I’m fine, thank you, Dabny,” he replied, just as the shaking stopped. “Dabny, I am prepared to tell you my business now.”
“Ok, good. Because I’m seriously about ready to close the door and lock it.”
“Dabny, my name is Borm.”
“Yes, that is correct.”
“Borm?” she asked again.
“Yes, that is correct. Still.”
“I have been sent to your location by my superiors.”
“Do your superiors work for some sort of hidden camera television show?”
“I’m sorry, Dabny, what do you mean?”
“That’s really the only way I see this making sense, honestly.”
“I’m afraid not. I have limited experience with this “television” you speak of. My superiors probably have even less experience with it.”
“Right, ok. So you’re probably an alien or something, yes?” She rolled her eyes. This was beginning to seem like some sort of ridiculous practical joke.
“The term ‘alien’ has a wide variety of uses, you realize, Dabny?”
“I guess.”
“So, yes, I would consider myself an alien, from your perspective.”
“Does this have a point? Because I have things to do.” Of course, she was lying, but there were cookies that were quickly becoming less warm and fresh.
“I wish not to disrupt your life, but I come to you with important information involving your place in the Multiverse.”
“The Multi-what?”
“I don’t know what that is.”
“I suspected as much, Dabny. Luckily, I brought along something that could explain that to you.”
“Like a translator from Weirdo to English?”
“I’m sorry, Dabny, I don’t know the language of ‘Weirdo’. But I assure you, I speak the language of English in your presence so that you can understand me.”
“Look…nevermind. Just show me whatever it is that you claim is going to help me understand whatever you’re trying to talk about.”

He nodded and revealed, from seemingly nowhere, a compact disc.

“I hope that you have a machine capable of playing the format known as ‘DVD’.”
“Wonderful news. Lets watch this together.”

Borm walked right past Dabny at this point, right into her apartment. Dabny raised a hand angrily to stop him, but stopped. She didn’t even know what to say at this point.

“Give me the DVD. I’ll play it,” she said with a hint of defeat.

She took the DVD from his hand and placed it in her player, underneath her aged television set. They stood side by side, then, and watched.

The screen was black for a moment, before a few silver symbols flashed on the screen that were completely illegible to Dabny. There were a series of clicking noises playing as well.

“I apologize for the dated music,” said Borm, “we have limited resources.”
“Oh. I’m sorry. I forgot that you would be unfamiliar with the works of Kepshin Kepshin Kepshin Kepshin Kepshin.”
“Yeah…I was never a big fan…”

The screen went black again, before flickering and suddenly becoming an obnoxiously bright green color. A sphere-like shape rolled onto the screen, looking like a very strange face. It began to talk.

Greetings, friend. My name is Oing, and I’ve been asked to teach you a lesson. Today’s lesson? The Multiverse!
So, I bet you’re wondering what the Multiverse is. Well, imagine your world and everything in it, okay? Imagine every single thing you can think of. Teachers, oysters, rainbows, Jupiter, clown noses and saxophones. Everything. Now, imagine that there was a whole other set of “everything.” Almost like a whole other world. Now imagine that there were hundreds of thousands of millions of sets of “everything.”
Do you follow me so far?

“Not particularly,” Dabny muttered.
“It gets easier,” replied Borm.

You’re entire existence is just one little piece of something much much bigger. Entire dimensions of existence that you can’t even imagine.
But there are some dimensions that you can imagine. Because there are some that are almost exactly like yours. Some even are exactly like yours. Some are very similar, but with a few changes here and there.

“I think I read about this in a comic book once.”
“Good, so you really are familiar.”
“I’m being sarcastic.”
“Oh. Well do keep watching.”

Your dimension, and dimensions very similar to it, are located very near to each other in the Multiverse. Therefore, its much more common for your dimension to have interaction with a dimension very similar to yours, rather than to have interaction with a dimension completely unlike yours.

“That’s reassuring.”

To further complicate matters…

The DVD did not get the chance to play any further, as there was a sudden explosion. The house shook and there was smoke everywhere. Dabny found herself on the ground, covered in soot, though she barely had a chance to comprehend what had just happened. She looked up to where her television once was, only to find a gaping hole in the wall behind the smoldering remains of her television. Standing outside, peering in through the large hole were two figures.

As the dust settled, they came forward into the room. Dabny did a double take.

Then she did a triple take.

And then, just to be sure, she did a quadruple take.

And then, she glanced over to Borm, who was getting up from the ground himself. Even he seemed surprised. And for someone as strange as him to be surprised, Dabny figured that what she was seeing must be real.

Standing before them was someone who looked identical to Dabny. She had short brown hair. Freckles. Glasses. In fact, it had to actually be Dabny. Except that it couldn’t be, as
Dabny was herself, and she was not wearing the same thing that the new Dabny was wearing. Nor, she thought, would she ever be caught dead in this new Dabny’s outfit.

She was wearing very little. Just a smallish tight white shirt. And some boots. And…a diaper. A white bulky diaper. It made Dabny blush just looking at it.

Behind her stood another person. Another female, but she had blondish hair and was dressed very similar to how a nurse might dress in a cartoon. A white outfit with a shortish skirt. A little hat on with the red cross and everything.

“Greetings, friends,” said the diapered Dabny.
“What the hell is going on?” asked Dabny."
“Greetings,” Borm cheerfully responded.
“My name is Dabnee.”
“Dabny? That’s my name,” hollered Dabny.
“Its very much like yours, but I spell mine with two Es instead of a Y.”
“Oh. Well that helps,” replied Dabny sarcastically.
“This may seem very strange to you,” continued Dabnee, “but I assure you, it will make sense in time.”
“I doubt it.”
“Oh, and before I forget, allow me to introduce my assistant: the fabulous cyborg nurse, Nursa 5.”

Nursa 5 nodded and smiled, but said nothing.

“Alright, what the hell,” Dabny hollered angrily. “Either someone needs to tell me what’s going on right now, or someone better wake me up from the most fucked up dream I’ve ever had.”
“You didn’t tell her yet?” Dabnee asked Borm.
“I was getting to it,” he replied. “I had to show her the DVD. Though we didn’t even get to finish it.”
“My bad. Well…to be blunt, Dabny,” Dabnee’s eyes became narrow and dramatic suddenly, “we’re here to save you.”
“Save me? From what?”

To be continued…

Dabny Vs. Everything, One

Looks like an interesting start. Will have to see where it goes and why Dabny needs saving from herself.

Dabny Vs. Everything, One

That was one of the most…different takes on the multiverse I’ve ever heard. But I like it. And it was well written (or, I think it was anyway, as I usually don’t see mistakes until it is too late), which is refreashing. I will be back for the next installment.

Dabny Vs. Everything, One

Oh boy! Multiple chapters and multiple universes! I’m intrigued and am breathless with anticipation for the next chapter!

Dabny Vs. Everything, One

I could be a bit of a stickler and say that it seems unlikely Dabny would stay talking to such a strange character at the door for that long and not close it on his face but…oh, wait, I just have. Still, that aside it was very good and I always enjoy your stuff, 70. I’ll be a-reading.

Dabny Vs. Everything, One

You know, I thought the same thing, Jaiden. But I decided I’d much rather just get the story moving instead of finding reasons for things to actually be 100% logical. I hope we can all deal with that.

Dabny Vs. Everything, One

I meant to say something to that effect myself, it wouldn’t make for much of a story if she’d closed the door on him and that was that. The only reason I mention it is that I used to go door to door raising money for charity and it doesn’t take much for people to slam doors on and/or abuse you, a friendly ‘hello’ does the trick a lot of the time.