[b]How Do You Spell Baby? (Version 2.0)
By Roxanne Deon[/b]
If nothing else, my experience made a believer out of me. I’ll never again scoff - much less laugh - when someone tells me there really is magic in the world. If witches are real - and I can testify they, are, then why not other forms of magic, too?
In November, Elyssa told me we needed to return to her home in northern Maine, and get her mother’s blessing before we announced our engagement. She told me that her mother was part of a group of “wise women” and Elyssa would not marry me without her mother’s and the group’s - the Coven’s - permission. I was an amused, rational skeptic, when Elyssa sincerely informed me that the group practiced “white magic” ceremonies.
I didn’t mean to laugh out loud, but I did. Elyssa fixed me with that intense stare that meant she was definitely not amused, “I’d advise you to keep that attitude to yourself, Dennis. Having the Coven’s blessing is very important to me. I can’t marry you if the Coven foresees a bad ending to our union, or a barren marriage. Children are very important to me, Dennis. You know that, and it’s not a laughing matter.”
“Hey, I want kids, too,” I said, with more enthusiasm than I really felt, “But, putting our whole future in the hands of some group of modern-day witches, just doesn’t seem all that ‘wise’ to me, Elyssa. I mean, if any one of these wise women takes a personal dislike to me, for whatever reason, you’re really going to give her a veto over our marriage?”
“It won’t be like that, Dennis, you’ll see,” Elyssa said firmly.
In mid-December, we packed for a three-week visit to Maine, planning to stay for most of the winter semester break. We flew into Bangor, arriving as the sun was setting in mid-afternoon, and a cutting northern wind whipped through and under our clothes.
Lilith Merrin was a slender woman, though it was hard to tell under the layers of clothing she wore. After feeling the wind, I wished for a few more layers, myself. I knew she was forty- one from Elyssa’s description, but she appeared no more than ten years older than Elyssa’s age of nineteen. Tiny laugh lines and a small “v” crease at mid-brow were the only age lines I noticed. She wore only eye make-up, and not much of that. The family resemblance was very strong; Elyssa seemed more like a younger twin than Lilith’s adult daughter.
Elyssa’s mother drove us north on the interstate for nearly two hours. There was no real town - just a couple of convenience store / gas stations near the exit. We took several turns, on roads that were crowned, potholed, and rippled with years of frosts setting and heaving the roadway. Finally, we turned onto a gravel road that was barely two lanes wide, and wound through the thick pine and spruce woods. We drove a mile or more through the dark forest to the clearing that held the house, and several small outbuildings.
The house and its outbuildings were modern, stained cedar shingle structures in a “shed” style architecture. All of them had steeply pitched rooflines, and lots of south-facing energy efficient glass. Lilith led us to a second-story bedroom. She placed her hands together, and said “Be welcome to enter.”
I stepped inside, wondering at her odd doorway ritual. From the decor, and souvenirs, I guessed the room was Elyssa’s bedroom when she’d lived at home.
Gesturing to the bedroom at the opposite end of the bedroom loft, Lilith said, “And, that’s where you will be sleeping for the duration of your visit with us, Dennis.”
“Elyssa, didn’t you tell your mother we’d be sharing a room?” I asked, winking at Lilith to show I was just joking.
“Not funny, Dennis,” Elyssa said sharply.
“Only married couples, and mothers with young babies share a bedroom under my roof, young man,” Lilith’s tone held no humor. Her unwavering stare was even more grim, “Since I know my daughter would not marry you without my blessing, Dennis, are you telling me you want to sleep in the crib we keep in Elyssa’s room?”
I peeked at the antique wooden crib in one corner of the bedroom. A somewhat more modern changing table with drawers stood beside the crib. For some reason, I noted that the shelves above the changing table were well stocked with piles of diapers, diaper changing supplies, and infant clothing. Lilith was certainly prepared to have a baby staying in the room.
“I don’t think I’d fit in the crib, Mrs. Merrin,” I said, as seriously as I could manage, “Besides, it’s been years since I needed to sleep in diapers.”
“Just because you’ve mastered potty-training, Dennis, doesn’t mean you’re mature enough to marry my daughter,” Lilith responded, still showing no sign of amusement, “Her room has been warded by protective spells, young man. Anyone who trespasses into places they don’t belong would pay a high price for such abuse of my hospitality. I strongly advise you to stay out of here unless I invite you to enter, or you may find you’re not too big, or too old, for cribs and diapers, after all. Any trespasser in this room will find himself in diapers and in that crib awaiting my return.”
“Dennis knows the house rules, Momma. Really,” Elyssa said, quickly, and pinched me on the leg to keep me quiet, “He won’t be anywhere he shouldn’t be. He wants your blessing and the coven’s as much as I do. Don’t you, sweetie?”
“Of course I do, Mrs. Merrin,” I said with all the sincerity I could muster, “I know how much this means to Elyssa, and I’ll do whatever I can to convince you and your friends that I’ll be a very good husband to her. I’m sorry if my sense of humor has upset you”
“I’m sure you’re being as sincere as you can be, young man,” Lilith responded coldly, “But, the Testing will prove whether or not your love for Elyssa is true, and mature enough to last. When the coven gathers on Saturday, we’ll decide whether your union with Elyssa will happen, or not.”
She left us alone in the hall, and I spoke softly to Elyssa, “I’m just guessing, but your mother isn’t a ‘fun’ person, is she? So, what time do you want me to sneak into your room tonight?”
“Dennis! Don’t joke about that anymore - especially around my Momma,” Elyssa said sharply, "She wasn’t kidding about those warding spells, you know. I’m not marrying you if I have to change your diapers, instead of our baby’s.
“Oh, right, like I’d really turn into a baby,” I chuckled, looking carefully to see that Elyssa really was serious.
“Don’t scoff at things you know nothing about, Dennis,” Elyssa warned earnestly, “And, don’t be breaking my mother’s house rules, even if you don’t believe in the consequence to be paid for being foolish.”
“All right, Elyssa,” I said, giving her quick kiss, “I’ll be a good boy, and stay in my room. I promise.”
I slept poorly, twice being jolted out of dreams in which Elyssa seemed to have become gigantic, or I had been reduced in size to that of an infant, and she was chasing me through the house.
At breakfast, I tried to exorcise those nightmares by telling Elyssa about them. When I’d finished what I thought was a comic description of gigantic Elyssa chasing me through a haunted house, she gave me a frightened stare in reply. She placed her hand over mine on the table, and said, “The room you’re using is warded against bad dreams, Dennis. If you had this dream in that room, it means this is a ‘true’ dream. In one way, or another, your dream will come true.”
“What?” I looked at her in surprise, “Elyssa, you can’t really believe I’m going to be magically changed into a baby, and chased all over this house by you?”
“Just be sure you stay out of my room, Dennis,” Elyssa replied seriously, “if you do that, maybe your dream will only have a figurative meaning for us.”
“Whatever you say, Elyssa,” I answered, humoring her.
Later that morning, I was alone in the house, reading in my room. Elyssa and her mother had gone to visit an elderly aunt, and would not be back until lunchtime. I thought I heard noises coming from Elyssa’s room. Rising, I went out to the hall to investigate.
From the hall, I could clearly see the corner of her room that was furnished as a nursery. Nothing stirred that I could see in that corner, or the other areas I could see. I stopped at the doorway.
I chided myself for believing that Elyssa’s room might really be protected by a magic spell. No matter how much I pretended to take Elyssa’s beliefs seriously, there was no way I would believe them to be true.
There was no one else here, I told myself. If you really don’t believe in spells and magic, why not do a little snooping into Elyssa’s past while you have the chance? Stopping again, I reminded myself of my promise to Elyssa. Even if I didn’t credit magic spells protecting the room, shouldn’t I keep my promise to her anyway?
She would never know I hadn’t, I told myself. Besides, I rationalized, she’d surely want me to maker sure a mouse - or some other intruder - hadn’t invaded her room.
I stepped across the threshold into Elyssa’s room, knowing I probably shouldn’t do it. But, I truly, really never expected that a genuine magic spell protected that room. How could I when I was so certain there was no real magic?
I was almost immediately surrounded by a swirling whirlwind of dark streaks, and intense colors, mixing wildly. I felt like Dorothy inside the tornado carrying her to Oz, except I wasn’t inside a house, or moving. I reached out a hand to touch the seeming whirlwind, and it collapsed around me. I felt myself spinning wildly, and felt intense sensations - touch, sight, hearing, taste, - all blended together or crossed impossibly, so that I “tasted” sounds, and “heard” images.
When these bizarre sensations finally stopped, it took me a few moments to recover my senses. When I opened my eyes, I found myself looking at Elyssa’s room through a set of bars - the barred side rail of the antique crib was only a few inches in front of me.
As I reached out tentatively to touch one of the wooden bars, I stared in disbelief at the stubby fingers and the plump, pink, hairless hand at the end of my plump arm. A large mirror had been mounted on the wall opposite the one occupied by the antique crib. In the reflection, I saw a baby girl of no more than one year old, staring directly back at me in the glass. Staring sadly at my infantile reflection, I became an immediate believer in the very real power of magic.
I raised the pudgy hand that gripped the crib rail, watching the baby girl’s reflection do the same. Reluctantly dropping my eyes to look down at myself, I saw two plump legs emerging under the skirt of the ruffled pink baby dress I was wearing. I looked again at my reflection, having to accept - however reluctant I might be - that I was that adorable blonde baby girl in the mirror.
I had a brief feeling of fullness from my bladder, and suddenly, realized that warm pee was streaming out between my legs. I could feel the soft, bulky cloth of the diaper I wore growing wet between my legs, and under my buttocks. I was surprised to find the warm wet diaper did not feel uncomfortable, and then became distracted by the physical sensation of peeing as a girl for the first time. It felt so strange to have pee come out there, but I had no doubts anymore that I really was a girl. Peeing as a man, or boy, never felt like that.
I had the ridiculous thought that I needed to get out of Elyssa’s bedroom, or she was going to know I’d violated her privacy, in spite of her warnings. Then, I looked at my reflection, and realized how silly the thought was. One look at me would tell everything, of course.
After a moment, however, I wondered if my first thought might have some sense, after all. Maybe, if I could get out of this crib, and out of Elyssa’s room, the spell wouldn’t affect me after I was out of there. Maybe. It was some hope, however, and I pulled myself to a standing position inside the crib.
I had trouble just holding myself in an upright position, even with the crib side to steady me. My knees wanted to buckle, and I had to pull each leg into a locked position again. It was obvious that I was pretty small. My head didn’t even reach the level of the upper railing of the crib side.
I decided to see if I could get the side lowered, and dropped to my knees. Reaching through the lower portion of the side, I felt about for the spring release mechanism. After several attempts, I realized my arm was too short to reach the release bar. Despite all my attempts and no matter what position I tried, the crib side stubbornly remained locked in its position.
It wouldn’t be a very good crib if babies could let themselves out that easily, I reflected, in frustrated despair. Of course it was designed so the baby couldn’t let herself out of the crib. How much longer did I have until Elyssa and Lilith returned to find me like this?
The answer to that came much sooner than I’d hoped. I heard a car pull into the yard, and doors shutting loudly in the cold, crisp winter afternoon. I tired desperately to pull myself over the crib rail again, but my arms just weren’t strong enough for the task. With a loud “thump”, I fell back into the crib, and struck my head against the crib bumper on the other side. Though the bumper pad had protected me from major damage, I had landed against a crib bar, and it hurt. Hardly aware what I was doing, I found myself crying as loudly as my baby voice and lungs could manage.
Footsteps sounded loudly from the hallway as someone hurried upstairs. Lilith Merrin’s eyes widened, and her face broke into a wide smile when she looked down on me, crying on my back inside the crib. She easily released the crib side, and bent over to lift me into her arms. She patted my back gently until my sobbing began to subside, then called loudly downstairs, “Elyssa, you’d better come see this. Looks like someone has been trespassing, and SHE got caught by the Baby Spell.”
Elyssa gave me a intensely disappointed look as she saw me being held in her mother’s arms. Reaching out to take me into her own arms, Elyssa said softly, “Oh, Dennis, why couldn’t you just listen to me for once? Even if you didn’t believe this could happen to you, you promised me that you wouldn’t go into my room.”
“Gaga badoo babee daboo dadee,” or similar nonsense sounds, was all I could say in reply to Elyssa’s questions. I had only four teeth, and my tongue seemed much too large. I couldn’t get my lips or tongue to obey my efforts to form intelligible words.
“Well, it hardly matters why HE disobeyed, now, does it, dear?” Lilith observed reasonably, "Right now, SHE probably needs a dry diaper, and a warm bottle of formula more than anything else. Why don’t you see to changing her, and I’ll go warm a bottle of nice formula for her? "
Elyssa carried me across her bedroom to the changing table, and placed me on the padded top. Lifting the skirt of my pink baby dress, she drew off the plastic-lined “rumba” panties covering my wet diaper. Removing the diaper pins, Elyssa put the wet diaper into a pink diaper pail beside the changing table. I squirmed at the chilly touch of the baby wipes she used to clean me. When she held my tiny ankles in one hand to lift me from the table, and clean my buttocks, I got a good view of the infantile slit between my legs. When she carefully cleaned around, and between the lips of my new sex, I could not contain a high-pitched squeal of pleasure at the sensations I felt from the area.
“Feels good, does it?” Elyssa asked, teasingly, "If you like it so much, I can arrange for you to stay like this, you know.
"Nanana, " I said, shaking my head. It did feel good, but I didn’t want to remain a baby girl.
“Well, I may not have anything to say about whether you stay like this, or not, sweetie. Now that you’ve violated a warding spell, it becomes a matter for the whole coven. There are thirteen wise women who will have to agree to restoring you to the man you were,” Elyssa said doubtfully, dusting me with silky baby powder, and gently rubbing it over my smooth skin.
Lifting me off the padded top again by holding both of my ankles in one hand, she slid a dry diaper under me. She lowered me back onto the thick diaper, and drew the front between my plump thighs. Tugging the corners snugly together, Elyssa secured them with diaper pins. Slipping my tiny feet through the leg openings of a new pair of the 'rumba, panties, she pulled them back in place over my thick diaper.
The bulky, soft diaper seemed to me the most comfortable item of clothing I had ever worm. Swaddled in the soft, cottony caress of the diaper, I felt a wonderfully security and comfort in wearing it. Even wearing a wet diaper had felt better than anything else I could recall wearing had, I realized. Was this why it was so hard to toilet-train toddlers? Because wearing diapers felt so good, none of us wanted to give them up?
Elyssa’s mother returned carrying an infant nurser filled with baby formula. Elyssa took the nurser, and sat with me in the rocking chair before the window. I was not happy about having to drink formula from a baby nurser, but I was ravenously hungry, as well as thirsty. I took the rubber nipple eagerly, as Elyssa pressed it between my lips.
The warm formula was delicious! As I suckled eagerly I found the taste satisfying in a way I could not recall from anything else. I swallowed the formula happily. I could not seem to get enough of it, and soon emptied the nurser. Elyssa then lifted me to her shoulder, and patted my back gently until I belched out the air swallowed while nursing. As I burped, I felt a small squirt of pee spurt between my legs and dampen my diaper there.
“Can you call Aunt Helen, Momma, and ask if Jenny has a highchair and a playpen we might borrow for a while?” Elyssa asked, rising from the rocking chair, holding me firmly, “I’m going to drive over to Millinocket and stock up on formula, baby food, and a few other things we’re going to need for little Miss Denise.”
“Let me call Aunt Helen first, and see if Jenny also has an infant car seat you can use, dear. The police will give you a ticket these days if you don’t have your baby in an infant seat,” Lilith answered. She smiled at me, and gave my smooth cheek a soft caress, "I must tell you, dear, I really prefer Denise here to Dennis. You’re going to have to do a lot of convincing if you want my vote to reverse the warding spell. Right now, I have to say being a baby seems to suit Denise far more than being a man suited your Dennis.
Elyssa’s cousin, Jennie, was a short, slightly chubby young woman. She arrived in a mud spattered Volvo I glimpsed as Elyssa carried me past the kitchen window. Jennie soon mounted the front steps with her three-year-old daughter, Sara, in tow, and a well-padded infant’s car safety seat on her hip.
“So, this is the curious former boyfriend, huh?” Jenny asked, grinning as she gave my tiny foot a shake.
“Oooh, a baby” Sara said, seeing me in Elyssa’s arms, “Can I play wif the baby, Mommy?”
“Sure you can, Sara. But, play nice. This is Denise, and she’s just a little baby, you know,” Elyssa said, crouching beside Sara, and holding me to face the little girl, “You two can play in the living room while your Mommy shows me how to put the seat in my car.”
Elyssa carried me into the living room, and placed me on the carpet in front of the television. Turning it on, she switched stations to the local public television outlet. Sesame Street was playing, and Jennie clapped her hands excitedly on seeing Big Bird. Elyssa patted the carpet beside her, “Here, Sara, you can tell Denise all about Sesame Street. Keep an eye on her, so she doesn’t crawl away. OK?”
“Otay, Aunnie 'Lytha,” Sara lisped happily, sitting beside me on the carpet. She was only three years old, but Sara was far larger than I was. She loomed over me, “I’m big girl. You’re just a baby, Denithe. You gots to do what I thay, cauth I the big girl.”
I sat watching the children’s show, and trying to ignore Sara. I could not even get up to walk away from her childish prattling, and Sara had been charged with preventing me from crawling away. The last thing I wanted was to be wrestled to the floor by an excited three-year-old.
Jenny returned carrying a highchair, and took it into the kitchen. Elyssa entered the living room with a folded mesh playpen. She set it up quickly to one side of the central seating arrangement. Bending down, she lifted me into the playpen, “C’mon, Sara, you can help me bring in some of the baby toys your Mommy picked for baby Denise to play with.”
I was as effectively caged in the playpen, as Dennis would have been in a jail cell. Getting to my hands and knees took a concentrated effort. Pulling myself to a standing position took all the strength and coordination I could find in my tiny body. I clung to the top rail of the playpen, and watched big Sara, and the gigantic adults carry in boxes of baby toys, and clothes.
Sara dumped a small box of brightly colored infant toys into the playpen with me, “Here, Denithe, you can pway wif dese toys. Otay?”
“She’ll play with them later, Sara. OK?” Elyssa said, lifting me out of the playpen, “Right now, I need to put Denise into her snowsuit, so we can go shopping. Want to help me change her?”
I was carried back upstairs to Elyssa’s room. She put me on the changing table to remove my pink baby dress and white cotton slip. Sara stood by the changing table, watching intently as Elyssa laid me on the padded table to remove my damp diaper, and rumba panties. Sara fetched the clothes that Elyssa requested, while she washed my diaper area.
“Denithe gots a wittle nonnie wikes mine,” Sara observed, pointing proudly at the line of my infantile vaginal lips.
“Yes, Sara, that’s because Denise is a little girl, just like you. Little girls have nonnies down there,” Elyssa grinned down at me, and winked. I had never felt so completely exposed and helpless as I did looking up at this toddler staring at my nakedness. She was only three, but even she seemed huge to me now.
Elyssa slowly adjusted the folds of the diaper between my legs, and carefully secured the corners with diaper pins. Taking another pair of plastic panties from the shelf above, Elyssa adjusted their fit to cover my bulky diaper, being sure the panties covered and enclosed my thick diaper.
She placed me in a seated position, and pushed my arms and head into a short-sleeve undershirt, and a pastel green jersey. She dressed me in a pair of pale yellow bib-front overalls. After putting two pairs of stockings on my tiny feet, she put me into a pink and gray one-piece snowsuit, and added tiny plastic boots for my feet. I could hardly move, much less walk, and had to be carried by Elyssa out to the car.
They’d decided to do the shopping together, and had put the infant seat on the rear seat of Jenny’s Volvo wagon beside Sara’s toddler safety seat. Jennie fastened Sara’s harness around her, while Elyssa was placing me in the infant seat. The infant seat faced the rear of the car. All I could see was the upper half of the window beside me, and Sara looking down on me from her seat beside mine.
“You have a diaper bag for her?” Jennie asked, when she was done securing Sara, “I didn’t think so. Here, use this old one of Sara’s. Little babies need lots of diapers, and bottles wherever you take them. Your Mom still has some of Sara’s old nursers here, doesn’t she?”
“Yes, I fed her with one of them earlier,” Elyssa said, “Let me go get some diapers and a nurser. Shouldn’t take me too long.”
Sara spent the time as we waited by playing with me. She had a set of brightly colored plastic keys, which she jiggled above my face while she cooed to me. I tried to reach the keys, and giggled each time Sara pulled them away. I told myself I had to pretend to be a real baby, but there was more to it. I felt happier, and more comfortable with my tiny baby girl’s body the more I acted like I rally was a baby girl.
Elyssa finally returned, and we set off for the shopping mall. It was a fairly long trip, nearly an hour. With my tummy full of warm formula, and the gentle rhythmic motion of the van, I fell asleep.
I awoke as Elyssa was releasing the safety harness, and lifting me out of the infant seat. From the dampness between my legs, and the heaviness of my diaper, I knew I must have wet several times while I was sleeping. Enough of the cold had penetrated my clothing to make my diapers feel chilly and uncomfortable by then. I began to make fussy noises, and to squirm uncomfortably as Elyssa tried to put me into a stroller. Finally, I had to start really crying to get her to stop, and see what was wrong with me.
“What’s the matter, sweetie,” Elyssa asked softly, “You hungry again? Need those dydees changed again?”
I managed to stop crying for a few moments, and nodded my head as well as I could manage. Elyssa finished securing the stroller harness around me, "Ok, then. C’mon, we need to get to the women’s rest room. They have a nice changing station there we can use.
Elyssa pushed me through the mall, as Jennie and Sara walked along beside us. I stared around at the enormous space of the mall, and all the gigantic adults moving quickly through it. I was happy to ride safely inside the stroller. Elyssa pushed the stroller into the women’s restroom, and quickly removed me from the stroller.
Elyssa had to remove my snowsuit and boots before laying me on the diaper changing station. She unfastened the snaps lining the inner seams and crotch of my yellow overalls, and pushed them up around my chest. Pulling my plastic panties down to my ankles, she quickly removed my wet diaper, and dropped it into a plastic bag.
It was chilly lying on the changing station with my lower body exposed, while Elyssa gave my diaper area a thorough cleaning with baby wipes. It had been embarrassing enough to have a three-year- old girl watching my last diaper change, but this was much worse. Women and children entered the women’s room constantly while Elyssa was changing me. It was humiliating to realize that no one thought their presence might embarrass the little baby girl having her diapers changed in front of them. Why would they or any baby be embarrassed by it? Finally, Elyssa had the dry diaper on me, and quickly put my plastic panties and overalls back in place, too.
“You’ll be more comfortable without this heavy snowsuit, while we’re shopping, Denise,” Elyssa said, placing me back in the stroller. She grinned at me, and gave me a quick kiss, “You look just adorable in that outfit, sweetie. I may decide to just keep dressing you like this. It suits you much better than the sloppy way you dressed as Dennis most of the time.”
Jennie and Elyssa took us into one of the big department stores at the end of the mall. Finding the infants clothing section, Elyssa took me out of the stroller, “I want to find Denise some pretty little dresses, and diaper sets. I’ve always wanted my own baby girl to dress in pretty, feminine clothes, and now I have her. I’m going to dress her like a little doll. Oooh, let’s see how you look in this one.”
She dressed me in a fancy pink and white dress. It had white lace at the hem, sleeves, and neck, and a big, pink bow, which tied in the back. I really did look adorably cute in that fancy dress, I admitted to myself grudgingly. She set that dress aside, and dressed me in a couple of diaper sets. These were short dresses, with matching diaper covers. Sara was eager to help Elyssa dress and undress me to try on the various outfits, and articles they selected. I really had become a living baby doll, a toy for the women and Sara to dress and pose any way they wanted.
After selecting several dresses, and diaper sets, Elyssa also chose an assortment of diapers, plastic panties, under clothing, stockings, and nighties for me, as well. She also got a new set of infant nursers, a couple of sectioned baby dishes, bibs, diaper pins, and an assortment of diaper changing supplies. I wanted to ask why she was getting so much new baby stuff, if I was really going to be transformed back into Dennis by the coven. However, such questions were far beyond my very limited communications skills at that moment.
Jenny bought a couple of dresses and some other items for Sara. She obviously enjoyed trying on new clothes, and all the attention she received from Elyssa and her mother.
After we went through the department store’s checkout, Jennie noticed that a photographer was set up taking child and family portraits near the store entrance. She insisted that Elyssa needed to get a whole set of pictures of me, Sara, and the two of them with us, adding, “I’m sure that your fiancé, Dennis, will want pictures of little Denise in some of those adorable little outfits.”
Elyssa and Jennie had a grand time, dressing Sara and me in several of our new outfits, and having the photographer take a series of group and single poses for each outfit. I tried once to cut short the session by crying, but Elyssa lifted me into her arms, and whispered in my ear, “You will do anything and everything I ask of you, unless you want to guarantee yourself several more years as baby Denise. Now, stop your fussing.”
When we finally arrived back at the house, I was feeling genuinely cranky, and doing my best not to show it. I was hungry and tired. My diaper was both wet and messy, and I began to whimper softly when Elyssa removed my snowsuit. Her sensitive nose caught the odor immediately, “Phew! Smells like someone needs a diaper change. Let’s get you changed, and then you can have a bottle before your nap.”
I nodded my head repeatedly in reply. I could barely keep my head upright, I felt so tired. Elyssa got Sara to help carry the bags of baby purchases to her room. Once again, I was completely undressed. I’d never realized how many clothing changes a baby went through in a day. Not even counting the gratuitous “costume” changes I’d endured for the photographer, this was my third clothing change since I’d awakened as Denise this morning.
I was beginning to really enjoy the regular ritual of my diaper changes. Every step was done in a predictable order, and I found the whole process immensely relaxing.
First came the cleansing, with extra attention and wipes if I’d had a BM. Second was the lifting of my lower body from the changing table, both of my tiny ankles gripped easily by Elyssa’s huge hand, to slide the dry diaper or diapers under me. For my nap, Elyssa apparently planned to double-diaper me again. Third was the gentle rubbing of Elyssa’s soft hands all over my diaper area with soothing, sweetly scented baby lotion; sometimes including another massaging of a diaper rash ointment. Fourth was the baby powder, which felt like silky dust being tenderly rubbed across my smooth, sensitive skin. I’d had no idea skin could be so sensitive. Fifth was the drawing of the bulky diapers between my legs, tucking the folds of the soft cotton to fit neatly between my plump thighs. Sixth was the securing of my diapers with plastic-capped diaper pins; she had purchased, and was now using a set of pins with pink “bunny” shaped caps. Seventh, and finally, the changing was finished when she placed a pair of plastic panties over my diapers, and carefully adjusted the fit of the leg openings and the waist to be sure the panties completely enclosed and covered my diapers.
After the diaper change, Elyssa dressed me for my nap in a pastel pink one-piece, footed sleeper. It was chilly in her bedroom, and the sleeper was wonderfully warm. I felt a last shiver from the chill and a small spurt of pee dampened my dry diaper. Even that felt wonderfully relaxing. Wearing diapers was like being naked and protected at the same time; it gave me a delightful sense of freedom and reassurance.
Sara returned from the kitchen with my nurser of warm baby formula, and Elyssa carried me to the rocker beside the window. She began to hum a soft lullaby, as she placed the nipple between my lips, and started the chair gently rocking. The delicious warm formula, the rocking motion, and Elyssa’s soft humming combined to quickly send me deeply asleep.
I was wetting my diapers as I awoke in that crib for the second time that day. The warm wet bulk of my diapers felt marvelously comforting and comfortable. When I’d finished wetting, I rolled languidly onto my stomach, and pushed up to my hands and knees.
I was getting used to crawling, and preferred it to trying to walk. I was much more stable, and moved faster on all fours. Sitting in one corner of the crib, I studied my reflection in the wall mirror. I was already beginning to accept internally that the baby girl I saw in the reflection was actually me. When I thought about myself, the image I pictured in my mind was no longer Dennis, the young man.
Now, I found I was seeing my self-image, my “self”, as the baby girl, Denise. I was now actually resisting the image of my former “self” as being me any longer.
I sat contentedly in my crib, holding a plush, pink teddy bear, and sucking on the pacifier I’d found. The remnants of my “Dennis self” told me I was crazy to welcome the comfort and dependency of being a baby over being my own adult. No matter how much that remnant tried to convince me that being an adult was better than being a baby, the wondrous feelings of actually being a baby refuted every argument. There was no logic to it for me; I simply knew that being a baby again, (and a baby girl, especially) was much better than anything about being a grown man had ever been.
Elyssa entered the room, smiling widely at finding me awake, and sucking happily on my pacifier. Taking me from my crib, we repeated the comforting rituals of undressing, and the diaper changing. My fourth outfit of the day was one of my new, pastel blue diaper sets. This one had flounces around the leg openings of the diaper cover that matched the flounced hem of the long-sleeve top. A matching bonnet and booties completed the adorably feminine outfit.
Jennie and Sara had gone home, and I was alone with Elyssa and Lilith in the big house. As Elyssa carried me into the warm kitchen, Lilith was spooning strained baby food into a sectioned plastic dish. Elyssa placed me in the borrowed highchair, fastening the seat belt, and sliding the tray in place before me. She tied the strings of a big plastic bib around my neck. It provided full coverage of my front.
I’d had only two bottles of formula all day, and found I was very hungry. I swallowed the creamy strained baby foods eagerly, though spurts of the gooey stuff escaped from my gap-toothed mouth and ran down my chin to fall upon my bib. I didn’t care how I looked, and blithely rubbed my hands and face with a mixture of the strained foods as Elyssa fed me steadily. Finally, I felt full, and pushed her hand away as she directed another spoonful at my mouth. She ignored my effort, and ladled in the last spoonful. Taking the sectioned dish to the sink, she returned with a washcloth to clean my face and hands.
“Now that you’ve had your supper, you can have your nurser in your playpen while Momma and I have our supper,” Elyssa told me, removing my messy bib, and lifting me into her strong arms. I was comfortably full of food, and felt so secure in Elyssa’s arms. I almost wanted to cry in anxiety as she lowered me into the mesh playpen. She handed me the plastic nurser, and added, “Be a good baby, and drink all your formula.”
I spent most of that evening in the playpen, while Elyssa and her mother talked softly before the living room fireplace. I seemed to have trouble following a conversation of more than two sentences, and found it easier to amuse myself playing with the brightly colored toys, and the soft stuffed animals in my playpen.
I tried for a while to spell words with the alphabet blocks, but soon found myself confused and unable to recall which symbols represented which sounds. I soon gave up spelling efforts altogether when I couldn’t tell the difference between an “A” and a “V”. Then I realized I couldn’t recall the word I’d been trying to spell. The more I tired to focus on the letters, the less I could seem to recall about letters, words, and the whole concept of language.
The same thing occurred, when I tried to concentrate on time, and numbers. An antique clock chimed the hours and half-hours in the living room. When its sound attracted my attention, I tried to determine what time it was. Though the concept that clocks “told” time was fairly clear to me, I found myself unable to tell the “6” from the “9”, or the “8” from either of them. I couldn’t recall how to read the numbers, the proper order, or how exactly to “tell” time from the numbers.
Again, the more I tried to focus on these concepts, the less I remembered or understood about anything relating to mathematics and numbers. Soon, I was unable to count the fingers on one hand, since I no longer recalled the proper sequence even to five.
It was much more satisfying to play with my toys, and these presented concepts my newly infantile mind could grasp. The set of brightly colored rings, which fit over a conical-shaped post, made it easier to understand “bigger” and “smaller”. The bigger rings went on the post first, fitting the bigger diameter of the lowest part. The smaller rings went on last, fitting the smaller diameter.
I understood “bigger” and “smaller” pretty well - Elyssa was now much bigger, and I was now much smaller. This also seemed right and proper to me now.
Three more days passed between that of my transformation into baby Denise, and the meeting of the coven. Three days of the comforting rituals and regular schedule of an infant’s life, and I was finding it difficult to even recall being an adult. Being a baby was much easier if I didn’t try to think; just feeling and reacting like a baby became more natural with each passing hour.
I had little understanding of the purpose of being before all these strange women, or what was at stake, until incredibly, I found myself restored to being Dennis. It took me a moment longer to realize I hadn’t been quite completely restored. I was still wearing diapers. I was still unable to control my bladder or bowels any better than I had as an infant. I was still female.
Kathleen Donally, the coven’s senior member, spoke for the circle of wise women. Solemnly, she intoned, "Dennis Conners, you have been adjudged guilty for breech of promise, and violating the protective wards of your fiancé’s room. The coven has agreed, one and all, to the sentence we will impose. For the sin of breaching your promises to Elyssa and Lilith, you will keep the sex and the diapers you acquired in that breech for a period of at least one year from this date. You will remain a baby girl in this respect until both Elyssa and Lilith decide you have earned the privilege of having your manhood restored.
"For the crime of trespassing on the wards of a coven member, you are sentenced to face a testing by each coven member. Each of us will devise and impose a test upon you, which presents you with a choice between one wise, mature choice, and one foolish, immature choice.
"For each test you fail, you will become smaller and younger. You will also regain one physical aspect, and one infantile behavior of the baby girl you have been these last four days. That physical aspect and infantile behavior will remain imposed upon you for the duration of the year, or more, during which Elyssa and Lilith will determine how long you need to remain a baby in diapers.
“If you can manage to pass all thirteen of the coven’s testings, your sentence for trespassing will be only that already imposed upon you for your breech of promises. Do you have anything to say before this sentence is imposed?”
I had a dozen stupid things I wanted to say, but wisely decided to shake my head silently as a reply. A year having a baby girl’s genitals, and diaper dependency seemed a drastic over-punishment to me, but I didn’t dare say that. I felt myself suddenly tingling all over with an odd “pin-and-needles” sensation, as the members of the coven each cast an individual spell upon me.