Immaturity within the ABDL community

So, a bit of context. I’ve recently moved to Shropshire (UK) and have been trying to meet other DL’s (mostly) and a few AB’s.

Having now met with a total of 8, I’ve yet to find someone who can hold an intellectual, sustained conversation. Everyone seems… Immature. I realise that that aspect is sometimes part of the fantasy, but it strikes me that a lot of the louder and more approachable members are in the mindset of being within the fantasy as much as they can get away with. Bear in mind that I have only met with males (same as me) - not due to a lack of trying though.

Has anyone else come across this, or am I being a prude?

Rob

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

You have to face the reality that there are some people out there who are into AB because they are literally too emotionally immature to handle being an adult. Not all, but some.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

Then of course there are people like me who are intellectual and yet…immature too. :stuck_out_tongue:

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

I agree with you emisnug on the point of having intelligent conversation… I am a DL and would like to find someone who I can talk to and not feel like I have to be a daddy “all the time” but it appears that you may be right. I have some good news though I have just finished my first test and passed the technician class ham radio license exam. Lol at the moment just being a little random but anyhow whats up with you?

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

See, this sounds to me like you only take on the role of Daddy in order to have interaction with AB’s… I’m a Daddy “all the time”, but I also have intelligent conversations with my babygirl. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

Oh my goodness, you are so right. I’m a DL. I like to wear and use diapers because it feels good. I don’t want to chat in baby talk and I don’t want to parse meaning out of baby chat written in a chat room. I have no desire for role play as well. I just want to find people with common interests that also includes an interest in diapers. Is that too much to ask?

I need to study. I will be taking my technicians test next month. I went to my first field day and loved it. Everyone treated me so nicely. There was never any of the meanness that takes place in the ABDL community. Are you going to take your General test at the next testing period, or are you going to be a technician for a while? I plan to go all out and get my call letters on my car licence plates. It’s not that expensive in my state. I can’t wait to get my license and join the net they have every week.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

There is a lot of that in the community and I admit it bothers me too. I got tired of forums, online drama and role-playing because it gets old after a while. I’m at a point in my life as I push towards 40 that I am ready for the next part of life and I don’t want to deal with all the drama, games and crap from online immaturity. I just can’t take it anymore… the immaturity which is why I don’t participate much online and just lurk.

I don’t much care for baby talk in IMs, chats as I find it damn annoying myself. I also don’t like how some ABs want it to be all about themselves and never give me a chance to be the baby or let my little side out. I have had my own little feelings and I unfortunately never get a chance to be the baby. Always a daddy I guess…. never a baby.

That’s why you haven’t seen much of me posting online or dealing with a lot of it all. I just can’t take it all anymore myself. Yet, part of me says keep trying. So I do.

BabyChris121675

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

The great majority of people willing to meet on the basis of something as unusual and at times sexually charged as this are people who are otherwise not engaged in productive or useful things.

I enjoy the thought of people wearing diapers, but I wouldn’t ever use something so flimsy as the basis of meeting or befriending someone. Many of the people who do are, unfortunately, people not working terribly hard at much else.

“Soiling an undergarment designed for such a task” doesn’t strike me as a terribly intellectually engaging activity, anyway.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

I first experienced the ABDL community in 2010 and there are a lot of wasters, and immature people.
Luckily, this site is a safe haven from the weirdest bits.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

I remember making a similar post about it back in the days on here but it was on the xsorbit forum then where we used to be. I have noticed the immaturity too and most of them seem to have problems and a disability of some sort and have quirks. They also seem to have childish interests and be childlike. But yet we both talked like normal and they weren’t one of those diaper creeps who wants a mommy all the time and be a 24/7 baby. I have only seen those online. I even wonder if there is even a connection between AB/DL and emotional issues, autism, learning issues and history of child abuse, or other because all these seem so common in AB/DLs.

But some are so far into it, they are into baby mode all the time and I want to have a normal conversation with a 30 year old guy, not with a guy who is pretending to be a little boy and acting all immature because of it. I am not into role playing and I am not a mommy. I am a real mommy, get it. I have two kids. I just block them now or ignore them if they pressure me about it and not take no for an answer. These are what I call creeps. Then they wonder why they can’t find a mommy or why their mommy hasn’t been online in a while. Then there are some who will just want you to talk about it so they can get turned on so they keep pushing you for advice and not take “I don’t have any others” as an answer when your advice to them isn’t good enough so you run out of ideas. Just them being manipulative. They’re not asking for help, they just want to get turned on and masturbate to your words. Just like how I tried to show my friend online how to put a diaper on standing and he claimed he didn’t get a good look of it and he didn’t even tell me he couldn’t get a good view when I asked him and his excuse was “I meant I didn’t have a good view” when I asked him if he can see anything. I bet he was just getting turned on and wanted to see me put a diaper on just to get turned on than to learn how to put one on standing to make his incontinence easier when he has to change when he is at work or in public. Then he was mad at me because I “promised” will do it good whatever that is supposed to mean. I told him it wasn’t my fault he said yes when I asked him if he could see anything and I’m literal so he has to be more clear. That man pissed me off the last time and I didn’t care he was upset with me, he was upset because I wouldn’t be his mommy not because I was “dishonest” so he was insulting me and just wanted to argue so I blocked him and on facebook too. I don’t know if his intent was to get me to be his mommy by making me feel guilty but it didn’t work so it backfired in him because I blocked him finally. He was manipulative and always twisted my words and claimed I said this or that but too bad I save chat conversations. He was a creep and he it was ironic because he always went on about how creepy men “ruined it” for me and saying how he is a clean guy and shows women respect. He was just one of those guys who was too far into it it jeopardize our friendship.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

Kit, you might be correct about the cause of some of the immaturity. There were a lot of ABDLs that claimed to have Aspergers or some other mental disorder. Maybe there is a correlation. I’m sure the obsessive compulsive thing where you want to play baby all the time is an issue. There are people online that want that. I don’t usually role play. I just don’t, but some like to. Most people can only bring out the ABDL play a little bit so it doesn’t dominate their lives.

The other issue you ran into was not an immaturity issue, but instead it was a jerk issue. Your friend was a jerk and you let it cross friend boundaries. You seem to be a trusting and nice person and some people will take advantage of that.

It might just be hard to be a well adjusted and well rounded person and be into this. I may be way off and some can compartmentalize it better than others.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

Let it cross friend boundaries? I don’t want anyone who is a jerk or treats me bad. That isn’t a good friend to have.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

You misunderstood what I meant. You let him ask for things that were inappropriate for friends. You were trying to helpful and he was being a jerk. You did right to get rid of him. You didn’t do anything wrong, but you did give him an opportunity to be a jerk. I am sorry you had to go through that.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

Actually I offered to show him how. I just wanted to be helpful and since words didn’t seem to give him a picture in his head, I decided to be visual about it. I sometimes wonder if some stories he told me about himself were all an act, eg. (brain damage at birth so it affects his thinking so his stories may not always be straight, and the abuse he got from his aunt in his childhood and his mom doing nothing about it and didn’t even try). I also wonder if he was lying about not knowing how to put a diaper on standing just so I could show him how to do it so he can get some jollies in. We were long time friends and we had gotten back in touch when we lost contact with each other around 2008. By then he seemed different than before. That is why I say he let all this mommy stuff take over and jeopardize his friendship. He had changed in the past four years. But shame for him. He isn’t the only AB/DL guy out there like that. I hear some AB girls are that way too. One of my other online friends had his share of those. It’s all gimme gimme gimme and it’s nothing in return.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

this. emphatically this.

i honestly wish this was a rule :police:

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

OMG - the sum of every advert ever on any Fetlife AB forum:

I’m (insert age) years old and looking for a Mommy to change my shitty diapers and feed me bottles and spank me. Message me if you’re interested.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

I think this particular little cubbyhole of the fetish world is over-represented by people who “are the sum of their kink” when they present themselves romantically.

I met my wife and babygirl on Fetlife. I didn’t meet her by wearing AB on my sleeve, I met her by being thoughtful about explaining myself, my life experience, my interests, and what I had to offer a potential mate. Prior to meeting her, I met a lot of very strange women, including a 16-year-old who was lying about her age (!!!) but that’s just the nature of the beast on that site.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

I wouldn’t mind meeting someone who is into this. However, I won’t because I am in a relationship now. Previously I had no desire to change anyone’s poopy diaper, feed anyone bottles, and spanking someone makes me uncomfortable like I am hurting someone.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

The fact that you are asking AB’s to not be immature kind of defeats the purpose. The majority of dedicated AB’s are such because of two reasons: 1) they are not quite ready to become adults and are trying to delay their entry into the world as long as possible, or they just find it a way to dispose of stress. I’m not saying this applies to all ABs, but just keep this in mind.

Re: Immaturity within the ABDL community

Another thing about the immaturity level is how a lot of ABs focus on entertaiment that to me is ad-nausea- meaning it’s too cute for me and I need a few hours of Call of Duty or Grand Theft Auto after it- cutesiness is not something I tolerate too well for some reason plus it makes my stomach turn and churn.

I don’t get excited everytime Disney comes out with another movie, CGI film, etc. I prefer more adult fare and that also puts me at odds too.

A while back I was trying to have an IM conversation with an AB guy online who found me through a site I was a member to and all he wanted to do was talk cartoons and Disney crap and I could not relate. He kept asking me if I like Handy Manny, Thomas The Tank Engine, Disney- etc I DO NOT AT ALL much care for it. And I finally had to tell the guy this; ‘It’s not going to work- I am into more adult entertainment and movies than kids stuff- kids stuff is too revolting for me and I also read books that have no pictures. Plus I am playing Call of Duty Modern Warfare right now.’- the guy went quiet after that.

For me, I just want to have intelligent conversation and maybe find someone I can talk to about my baby feelings that have been coming out more and more as I get older for some reason and I have had issues with trying to deal with them.

I am not trying find or meet someone, I’ve given up on that aspect of it all as I realize that I am never finding that someone to be that for me. I just need an outlet for my baby side and unfortunately I cannot get that through childish entertainment as most of it revolts me and makes me want to throw up with it’s cutsiness and simplicity.

BabyChris121675