I am awoken by daddy’s voice “mom don’t Pick her up.”
“Oh, nonsense all little love being held.” as I feel these hands scoop me up. My eyes pop open and instant fight mode kicks is.
This woman’s face older than mommies or daddy’s is completely in my field of view. I punch the biggest closest target I can, which happens to be her nose. I feel the nose give as I make contact she screams out in pain as I am dropped in a heap back in the crib. Daddy rushes over to me as the woman yells. “You stupid little bitch, you broke my nose.” Then turns to daddy “I knew it was wrong all littles need to be regressed.” She is holding her nose.
Daddy picks me up and holds me to his shoulder. “Shhhhh sweetie it will be ok. Mom go the bathroom and get cleaned up. Once Shawnna is awake she will be in a better mood.” the hollers out the room “rose can you come help my mom as I get Shawnna ready.” mommy was already at the door after hearing the screaming.
“What happened?” She asks daddy quickly explains “no, I got her you take care of your mom I can’t look at her right now.” Daddy hands me over to mommy as I start to cry. “Oh, princess I am so sorry. She said she just wanted to look.” She sits in the glider and we rock for a minute as I start to calm down. I start to shake as my adrenaline comes down. “Let’s get you dressed. They came earlier than expected.” She lays me on the changing table. And makes quick work of my change. She places a light purple party dress on me that does nothing to hide my diapers and a pair of white tights to cover my legs. “There you go all pretty for the party.” She reaches into the crib grabs my pacifier attaches it to a clip and clips it to my dress. “Now I want to ask a favor. If you feel you are about to say something bad, please put this in your mouth. You won’t be leaving our side unless it’s to one we really trust ok” I nod “good girl.”
I can hear Daddy talking to his mom in the bathroom. She tells him “How can you let a little menace like that in your house?”
“Mom the poor thing has PTSD. We react when startled.” He tells her
“That’s why all little need to be regressed. Then there is no worry about their past make it so they can’t even remember their names.”
As we leave my bedroom daddies mom and him are coming out of the bathroom. Daddy says “I guess proper introductions are in order. Mom this is Shawnna my little girl, Shawnna this is your grandmother Laura.”
I decide for now it may be best to save the piece “Hello Laura. I am sorry about hitting you”
“Yeah if it was in my power you would. Never be able to do that again.” Laura says
I lose all respect that I may have had for her then. She obviously thinks so little of us.
Mommy responds “it’s a good thing she isn’t yours then” as she turns and walks to the living room. There is a knock on the door. And mommy and I go answer as she opens the door there is an amazon that is a few inches shorter than mommy with fiery red hair in very tight curls. “Beth it’s so good you could come!”
“God Rose it’s like I haven’t seen you in a week. Oh yeah it has been a week” she responds with a laugh. “Do you think I could pass up the chance to meet your new little before everyone else. Is this her?” Mommy nods. “Hello Shawnna, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” she says directly to me holding out her hand.
I shake her hand “it’s nice to meet you also Beth. Mommy tells me you work with her.”
“That’s right and I promise when you come with her, we will have so much fun.” We all head into the living room the bigs chatting over me, not like I’m not there but just about things at work and catching up with each other.
As everyone one starts to show up, I am in mommy’s arms as she greats everyone. daddy and the guys are outside with the grill cooking on the grill. The littles are playing outside with a couple bigs keeping an eye on them I noticed one little is running around with the amazon kid and 2 of the littles are barely able to crawl. I am in mommies arms as she was stepping out back “I am going to have to sit you with the littles for a little bit. Ok hun?”
“Yeah I guess mommy” I say sticking the pacifier in my mouth.
She sets me down in the grass. I notice it is brook and Kate that are watching the littles and Mick. Brandon and Mick run over to me “Shawnna come play!!” they both squeal in pleasure that I am finally on the ground and can play.
“Mick, I know I told you this. And I am sure your parents did also Brandon. But Shawnna can’t run like you guys can” Brook says simply.
“Oh” says Brandon “is she regressed like Amber and Stephen?”
“No, I am not regressed my legs just don’t work right.” I say taking the pacifier out.
“If she was mine, I would just regress her and leave as she is.” Kate says.
Brook speaks up “you know we don’t talk bad about your parenting style. you really should respect theirs.”
Brandon interrupts my listening in “I can get my mommy or your mommy to take you over to the sand box. Does that sound fun mick?”
“Yeah that sounds like lots of fun!” Mick exclaims clapping her hands.
“Thank you but you two go have fun. I won’t be able to do a lot.” I say more than a little sad. As I start to feel sorry for myself.
“Auntie Rose, auntie Rose” Mick starts to yell “Shawnna is cwying”
Brook comes over “can I pick you up sweetie?” I nod my head as I am wiping the tears from my face. She picks me up and places me on her shoulder. “What’s wrong dear?” She asks as I quietly cry on her shoulder.
Mommy comes over after placing a dish on the outside table. “What’s going on?”
“I’m not sure I was talking with Kate, Brandon and Mick where talking with her. The mick starts yelling.” She explains to mommy.
“I… I… can’t go play, I can’t move, I can’t… I’m stuck wherever I am placed!” I studder past my crying.
Mommy places her hand on my back. “oh sweetheart, you are special just the way you are. And we will get you fixed as soon as we can. Then you can play all day long.”
“She would be better if you would just leave her that way. Hell, it’s your choice keep him as a him. That’s even better.” Kate says
“You need to shut up!!! Or you can just leave” mommy says and I can hear the anger in her voice. “I don’t tell you how to raise your littles. Stay out of mine!”
“Why don’t I take Shawnna in and get her changed.” Brook says
“Are you ok with Auntie Brook changing you?” Mommy asks.
All I can do is nod. As I am still snuffling in her shoulder. We head in and straight to my room. I can look over Brooks shoulder as we go in and I see mommy in Kates face talking very angrily. As brook lays me down on my changing table I ask, “Did I do something wrong?”
“No Shawnna you did nothing wrong. Kate just has some very poor views on how to raise a little. You are gorgeous and I am excited to see you be able to run and play with my baby girl.” As she takes my tights down, I see a shadow of pain cross her face as she gets her first look at my legs. “Oh, baby I am sorry for this.” As she untapes my diaper and pulls it down. I blush and hide my face in my skirt. “Oh, stop that silly. You are gorgeous regardless of what’s in your diapers.” She makes quick work of changing me. I can tell she has loads of practice. “There all dry, now I thought I heard your daddy saying dinner was almost done. Shall we go see?”
“yes, please! I am starving!” I respond eagerly
She picks me up and instantly blows a raspberry on my belly and I can’t help but to start giggling. “there is the happy girl I was told all about.” Brook says with a smile. She cradles me so I can see where we are going, as she heads out back. We see everyone starting to gather to get their dinner.
Beth walks over to us “No fair you got to change this cutie first. I thought we where going to be buddies.”
“I hope we can Beth I was upset, and she had me in her arms already. Would it help you feel better if I ate on your lap?”
“Oh, I would love that, and you can sit there when you open your gifts. If you want.”
“Yours or mommy’s” I grin
Brook hands me over to Beth who promptly plants a kiss on my cheek. “I am sorry today hasn’t gone as well as we had hoped. But I hear you have a mean right hook. You almost broke Laura’s nose.”
“I am sorry I did that. If I had been awake, I wouldn’t have.”
“Oh, dear don’t worry I don’t like her much either” she says with a wink. We sit down and I am pulled back against her belly.
“That little really should be with the rest” Kate says
“This party is for her shut the fuck up Kate. If you can’t keep your comments to yourself, you can leave.” Daddy says crossly.
“However, when we bring the cake out, she should go in her highchair. That is unless you want to wear the cake also.” Mommy says.
“oh, I have no intention on wearing any cake.” Beth chuckles.
“Steak or chicken mi bambino” daddy asks me
“you can’t be serious. You are calling that violent little bitch that?” Laura says.
“Yes, mom I do she is a part of my family. If you can’t accept that you can leave also.” Daddy snaps at his mom. “So, what would you like Shawnna?”
“um steak please.” I say. Daddy cuts a steak and puts a bunch of other things on the plate. And places it in front of me. I take a look at the plate there is the steak, mashed potatoes, pasta salad, fruit salad, and corn. I start to dig in.
“Use your fork sweetheart” mommy reminds me with a giggle.
I realize I started eating with my hands. “Sorry mommy, the foods really good tough” Beth wipes my hand and hands me my fork. I eat the whole plate as everyone is talking. There are some questions asked of me, and I answer them all respectfully even from Kate and Laura.
“See I can cook” Daddy says to Mommy.
“I never said you couldn’t. I’m just better”
Mommy hands Beth a bottle for me, she shifts me in her arms and starts to feed me. As I finish the bottle Mommy says, “I think it’s time for cake.” She lifts me from Beth’s arms and sits me in my highchair before she places the lap strap and the tray, she strips me of my dress then finishes securing me. Daddy brings out a small cake, one that I have seen babies eat on their first birthday I think it’s called a smash cake. He places it on the tray. I notice Brook is bringing out a larger cake for everyone else. My cake has ‘Welcome home Shawnna’ written on in pretty pink writing. There are purple icing designs around the top and bottom. There is a pink rose right above the writing.
I notice there is no fork, I look up and see mommy with a camera at the ready. I think to myself ‘I might as well embrace the little for this one’. I take a hand full of cake and take a small bite. I instantly get hit with the little high and proceed to start shoveling the cake in my mouth not caring the mess I make. I quickly loose track of how many flashes go off.
After I have eaten all that I can, mommy comes over to me with a washcloth and begins to wipe me down “Maybe it would be quicker just to give you a bath.” All I can do is smile at her. She finishes her work pulls me out “Lets take you inside for a bit.” She takes me in lays me on the living room floor. “Did you have fun princess?” She asks as she slides my dress back over my head
“Ahhh huhhhh wots mommy.” I respond when my head is free.
“good I’m glad, you know you didn’t have to go that far.”
“Wike I had a choice” I giggle.
She gives a little chuckle “Well I guess not. Let me place you in your walker and let you come down. We will all be in, in a bit so you can open your gifts.”
“otays mommy” God that little extract goes straight to my head
Mommy places me in my walker and I start to idly play with the toys on the walker. A few moments later Kate brings her littles in changes them leaving them in just their diapers and puts on the TV. Fiddles with the remote and puts it on a channel I have never seen before. She walks over to me, “This will put you in your place” and faces me towards the TV. As the show starts, I find my eyes unable to break from the TV and the world starts to fade.
I don’t know how long I was there watching the TV. I come out of my haze when the TV was turned off. With Mommy yelling at Kate and her littles crying. “What in the hell did you do?”
“Oh, stop its just temporary, she will be normal in a few hours.”
“I don’t care! We told you that we nor her desired to be regressed. You took it upon yourself to attack us, That’s the last fucking straw!!! Get your littles and your shit and get the fuck out of my house. You are not welcome near my family again!!”
“Your over reacting Rose” Kate sneers
“Over reacting. You fucking regressed my little girl.” Mommy yells. “Get out now” Mommy says just above a whisper to me it sounds like she is about to rip Kates throat out. I then start to realize just how far Mommy will go to protect me.
“Fine” as Kate goes to the back door and calls for Kevin.
“And don’t ever come back” Mommy says as I watch Kate and Kevin her husband gather their littles and belongings including the gift they bought. As they walk out the door mommy comes over to me. “Baby are you ok? Please just say something!”
“Mommy I am fine what happened?”
Mommy stops and just blinks at me for a second. “Mark come hear please.” She hollers.
Daddy comes in, in a rush “Everyone is still outside, getting a little worried about what’s going on. You look like you saw a ghost what’s wrong?”
“I come in and see Kate on her phone as her littles and Shawnna are fully engrossed in a regression channel.” Mommy says. As she says that things start to click in my mind. ‘the bitch tried to regress me. Why didn’t it work?’
“No, she didn’t, I’m going to kill her. Where is she?”
“Mark I already kicked her out and she is never coming back. But Mark it didn’t work. Shawnna wasn’t regressed.”
“Your shitting me. Shawnna, baby how do you feel?”
“I am fine Daddy; did she really try to regress me? And um…. why didn’t it work. I get the little high easy enough.”
Daddy looks at me then at mommy “Both of you. We can’t tell anyone. Rose you caught her resetting the channels. That’s why you kicked her out. We will talk to Dr Ungar Tuesday maybe she has an answer.” He looks at us both waiting for us to nod our heads. “Baby we will get to the bottom of this I promise.”
“Ok daddy……… am I broken?”
“No mi bambino you are just fine. Let’s finish this party up and we can spend some alone time together. How does that sound?”
“Great daddy. Mommy Bethy wants me to sit on her lap for the gifts, can I?” I can see concern on her face.
“Bethy huh I think she will like that nickname and yes you can. Daddy will hand you your gifts and I will gladly take all the pictures.”
Daddy stands up and walks to the back door. “Ok everyone the excitement is over. Let’s bring this party inside. Beth some little girl wants to sit on your lap to open her gifts.”
Everyone starts to come in. As Beth picks me up, she looks at mommy “so what happened? We all heard some commotion.”
“I caught Kate unlocking the regression channels.” Mommy says.
“Oh no. It’s a good thing you caught her on time.”
“Could you hang out after the party for a few?”
“Yeah no problem. Who wouldn’t want to spend more time with this cutie.” Beth says as she tickles me just a little and I squeal and giggle. She sits on the floor crossing her legs and plants me in her lap. Everyone takes a seat on the chairs or the floor as daddy starts bringing the gifts over.
As the first gift is handed to me, I start by reading the tag “To Shawnna, from Teresa and John” I say looking at Daddy’s sister, I start slowly pulling the tapes off the sides.
“Nope that is not how we do this” Beth says as she reaches and rips the paper.
“I wanted to save that. It was pretty.” I say with a little pout. I finish unwrapping the gift by ripping the paper as Beth had already started. Inside the box are some cloths, I pull one out and it is a denim overall dress, with a puppy embroidered on the bib. There is a Lavender onesie with a matching puppy to go with. “Thank you, Aunt Teresa. I can’t come give you a hug or I so would.”
“Your welcome dear I thought you might like it.” She says.
As gift after gift come my way. There are lots of cloths, and some items to make mommy and daddies life easier. One being a little monitor. Like a baby monitor but for littles. I think to myself ‘is there really a difference?’
I am handed another gift I read the tag “From Gammi, and pappi. Um who are they?”
“Brad and I are” Says Laura. “I know we never said to call us that. But no good little would be rude about it.”
“I am sorry I didn’t mean to be rude, I just wanted to thank the appropriate people.” I go and rip the paper and take a look at the box. On the front of the box is a picture of a smiling little with this belt type thing that seamed to be holding its arms to it and its ankles near his overly padded butt, with two smiling amazons looking down at the little.
Daddy takes the box. “Mom this is uncalled for. I am going to be blunt here and I don’t care how you take it. I have tolerated a lot because you are my mother. But you just crossed a line that you can never come back from. This “gift” will never be used. And most likely will be thrown out with the rest of the trash as soon as you leave. This treatment will never be allowed near my daughter and if you can’t accept that, there is the door. I assume you know your way home.”
Her jaw drops. “come on Brad it seams we are no longer welcome. Mark I am not sorry for trying to make your life easier.”
“Really mom, really. You knew our requests even before she came to live with us. You have known my feelings since I was a kid myself.” Daddy says. The more they are talking the angrier I am getting. I start to make a grumble in the back of my throat like a growl. Beth pulls me closer and starts to run her fingers trough my hair trying to calm me down. Daddy looks angry but sad at the same time. I am angrier at what she is doing to him then to me. “please just go” Daddy says. She grabs her things including the restraining device and leaves.
Beth looks down at me “Some little puppy was getting really angry there.”
“That fucking AMAZON hurt my daddy.”
“SHAWNNA, we don’t use that word.” Beth scolds.
“Bethy, I am not a racist person. And I know that term is viewed as a derogatory term. I am sorry, I see it this way there are bigs like you and mommy and daddy and Brook, who are all very nice. Then there are amazons that are very mean. And she is very mean.” I explain myself to her.
“Oh, my little puppers we are going to get along so well. Did you just call me Bethy? You are so cute.”
As I finish unwrapping the gifts, I get to Beths last. I read the tag “To Shawnna. From Beth” I look up at her and she winks at me. I promptly rip the paper. And I find it to be a tablet, little sized but as I read it says its designed to stimulate unregessed little minds. “Ohhhhh Bethy thank you soooo soooo much. I get so bored some days not being able to do a whole lot.” I reach my arms up to try to give her a hug, but she turns me around and we hug each other.
“You know I can get used to you calling me Bethy.” She whispers in my ear. “You know Rose and Mark if you’re not careful I may just steal this little girl form you.” She tells mommy and daddy with a grin.
“Over our dead bodies” daddy says, and everyone has a good laugh.
“Ok hun I think its my turn to change your cute bottom. I am going to go change her real quick and we will be right back.” Beth says
She stands with me and carries me into my nursery. As she lays me down, she looks me straight in the eye. “Yes, I already know what’s hiding under this cute diapie. You need to know I respect you and actually look up to you a little. Having the strength and courage to make that change. not a lot of bigs or littles would go through with it.”
“Thank you. Unfortunately, I really didn’t have a lot of choices left in my old dimension. And well since I was starting over and this option was given, I had to take the opportunity.”
“I don’t know all that you have gone through. I only know a small portion. I hope one day I can earn your trust enough that you are willing to share some with me.” She says as she untapes my diaper and starts to wipe me down.
Suddenly we hear the little voice of Brandon at the door. “Wait she has a pee pee like me. That’s so cool.”
“Brandon go back to your mommy, its not nice to barge in when another is being changed in private. And that’s why we came back here for privacy.”
“Sorry, I love your room Shawnna.” He says as he turns and heads to the living room.
“Well, it was bound to come out eventually” I say.
“Yeah its not something that can really be hidden for very long. The good thing, he didn’t seam to mind. And you will be seeing him at the little care center your mommy and I work at. So, you will have a friend.” Beth says.
She finishes changing me and takes me back to the living room. Teresa looks at me “I’m sorry we didn’t even know he was gone until he was at your door. I hope your not too embraced.”
“No, it was bound to come out eventually. Besides I can’t expect to only be changed in the privacy of our home.”
“This is true, Brandon come here let’s get you your night feeding then we can head out and get you to bed.” Brandon toddles over to her, as she unbuttons her blouse, and unhooks the nursing bra she has on. Picks up Brandon and cradles him as he laches on and starts to nurse. I can’t seem to take my eyes off the sight. “Your first time seeing this?” she asks. I blush and nod. “Its ok, this is normal for a lot of big and little relationships.”
Beth hands me over to mommy and says “why don’t wo open this up and see how it works” as she grabs the tablet. The three of us sit there figuring it out as Brandon is eating. Brook, Kris and Mick say their goodbyes, we all exchange hugs.
I tell Mick “Next time we are together maybe we can color.”
“Dat be fun” she says as she rubs her eyes. They leave after that.
When Brandon is done, he is quickly changed right there in the living room. Sleeping soundly, Teresa says goodbye and gives us hugs. I thank her again for the gifts. And they leave, that leaves me, mommy, daddy, and Beth. “So why did you ask me to hang out longer?” Beth asks.
“Shawnna, Beth is one of the very few your Daddy and I trust with everything.” I nod my head
“I really like her can we keep her?”
Mommy chuckles and squeezes me a little “Don’t worry sweetheart she isn’t going anywhere. Well Beth we told a white lie to everyone. I did not catch the TV on time. I don’t know how long Shawnna was watching it. She was completely engrossed into it, however, the funny thing. The hypnosis didn’t affect her. Not at all.”
“You really are a special little girl aren’t you.” Beth says to me.
“I just think I’m broken” I respond solemnly.
“No, you are not broken Shawnna, you are our sweet special girl. When we take her to her Dr Tuesday we are going to ask about it. It may be something normal, but we are going to get to the bottom of it.” Daddy says. He looks at me “I promise we will get to the bottom of it”
“So, are those four allowed around Shawnna again?" Beth asks
“Not its I have anything to have with it.” Mommy says pulling me in tighter as if to impress that she will always be there to protect me.
“So how can I help?” Beth asks
“Just another person to help protect her and cover if anything like this happens again. You know how that hypnosis is everywhere anymore.” Daddy says.
My mind drifts from what was being said or what had happened. It was going round and round about why an unregressed little would breastfeed. And why breastfeeding. “Mommy, why did Teresa breastfeed Brandon?”
“really. that’s what your thinking about?” Mommy askes shocked.
“I’m sorry. I know this is important. But until we know why I don’t see how it really matters. I am the way I am.” I say with a shrug.
“Yes, you are. And we love you now and forever.” Mommy says. “Well your question there are a few reasons. One, there is a lot of bonding that happens. There is a chemical in out milk that is sort of addicting like the little extract is. The chemical also has an effect on littles where they temporarily regress, but not like Amber and Stephen, more where the little losses some or all of the fear of letting go and be well little. I don’t know how else to explain it. It makes us happy and the littles happy.”
“Is it something you want to do?” I ask not out of fear but curiosity.
“Why don’t we talk about this latter how does that sound?”
“Well I will help keep an eye on the sweet thing. I really should get going let you get her settled and ready for bed.” Beth says.
As she stands to leave Mommy stands with me cradled in her arms and gives her a hug. “thank you, thank you for everything.”
“Don’t think on it” Beth says. As they part, I wrap my arms around Beth’s neck and hang there, she quickly grabs me and holds me close.
“Thank you for the gift, and just being you.” I say
She hugs me tight, “you are very welcome. I can’t have my little puppy going stir crazy cooped up n the house all the time now can I.” She hands me back to Mommy. Turns and gives Daddy a hug and leaves.
When we are finally alone. Mommy looks at me “Besides the trouble spots did you have fun today?”
“I did. A lot you’re your families are really nice. And so is Beth.”
“Your family too silly. Let’s get you your bottle dressed for bed and we can finish this discussion.” Mommy says. “Mark can you make her a bottle and bring it to the nursery
She carries me into my nursery, she takes my dress off and my tights. She changes me into my thick nighttime diaper. She walks to the closet and pulls out a deep purple night gown. “I need to do some laundry tomorrow.” She says to herself. I hold my arms up as she slides the night gown down my body. Daddy comes in with my bottle. “Thank you honey why don’t you stay.”
“If you want. I just thought it would be more a talk between you girls.”
“Well it may not effect you, but it does involve the care of Shawnna so yes stay. I for one would like to know your thoughts.” Mommy says. As she takes the bottle and sits in the glider positioning me in her arms. “So, you remember what I was saying about the bond between big and little?” I nod as I start to suckle from the bottle. “Well I am going to be honest; I would love for us to have that. But I only want to do what you are comfortable with. I will never push you to do anything, well there maybe sometimes I will have to. But this is not one of them. Your thoughts Mark?”
“Well as your mom said we wont push something on you that isn’t for your best interest. Do I think breastfeeding could help you. In a lot of ways, I am sure it could, but us consistently showing you love and protecting you will achieve the same but will take a longer time. We love you and only want the best.”
I push the bottle away. “Thank you for being honest, I will think about it.” As I finish speaking mommy puts the nipple back in my mouth.
Daddy comes over and kisses my forehead “I love you mi bambino sleep well. I will go get the little monitor and set it up as you finish getting her tucked in.”
“Thank you hun that would be nice so we can hear when she has a bad dream or wakes up.” As he steps out to get the monitor ready Mommy starts humming as I finish my bottle. I am sound asleep still suckling. I stir a little as she lays me in my crib handing me my teddy, I wrap my arms around it as she tucks me in.