Kristine's Desires 1-45 by Emi

[b]Kristine’s Desires

Chapter 1: A beginning[/b]

It started out like any other Friday night. Kristine had planned to go to one of the local clubs with her roommate Mary when a surprise visit from her long distance boyfriend left her with nothing to do. Mary and Jay went out for a quiet dinner alone, and Kris had little doubt that they’d be back to the apartment in no time. This was one of the times when she was most happy she wasn’t in college any longer - separate bedrooms were such a blessing! She remembered all to well the college years when she’d end up sleeping on the floor of one of the other dorm rooms instead of in her bed.

Kris looked around their relatively new apartment. They had just moved in two weeks ago, and had hardly any time together with which decorate the apartment. She flopped on the couch and looked at the high ceilings, cold and white like the rest of the apartment. It looked incredibly boring to her! Kris briefly thought about going out to the clubs alone, but knew that it was never a good idea in a new area without at least knowing a few people there.

“Uggghhhh,” she said to no one in particular. “This is going to seriously suck.” She knew that Mary would appreciate it if she was in her room by the time Jay and her got back. After arguing with herself for a few minutes about whether to spend the night in her room for Mary or the common room for her sanity, she decided to be a good friend. “She definitely owes me,” she mumbled as she grabbed a piece of cake and a glass of milk as she headed to her room.

It took her all of about ten seconds of her sitting on her bed for her to switch on her laptop. It flipped on and caused a soft blue light to envelop the room until Kris got around to hitting the light switch. She put on her pj’s while she was waiting, a nice silk set that she last year for Christmas. She dove onto her queen-size bed, and thanks to her silk pj’s, slid all the way over to where her laptop was resting at the end of the bed. As she settled in and took a quick bit of her cake, she saw her IM programs connect. She couldn’t believe that there was nobody on! (Well, no one she wanted to talk to anyway)

“I guess I’m the odd one out tonight,” she said. She clicked on Netscape and waited for her homepage to load up. She did her usual routine for the next hour, checking her email and visiting her regular message boards. She posted a few messages and updated her journal, and soon found herself playing on google. Kris always did love the ‘do you feel lucky’ button there. She stretched out her legs and thought of a fun search for the night. “Let’s see if I can dig up a social life out here…”, she said to herself, and typed in ‘young play in Sterling Virginia’.

The search went through in a few seconds, and Kris was surprised to see herself on a warning page. She did a quick browse of the warning (this page contains yadda, yadda), and quickly clicked the over 18 button. The first thing she noticed was the cartoon wallpaper on the website, quickly followed by the table of contents. She shook her head to make sure she was seeing right. Diaper stories? Diaper pics? Where to buy diapers?

She started to click the close button, but just for curiosities sake, she clicked on a few of the links. She skipped past just about everything, giving it a quick look… until she came to the picture section. She stopped dead and just stared at the picture… a grown woman, maybe in her 20’s, wearing a thick diaper over her middle and a button down blouse covering her chest. She was laying on her bed and had a soft smile on her lips as she rested against a pillow. She held a soft-looking brown teddy bear in one arm. Kris felt such a pull to the picture and couldn’t explain why. She kept looking at it over and over again, even as she started giving a more serious look to the rest of the site.

Kris shook her head again. “Why am I still looking at this?”, she thought to herself. She started to click the close button when she noticed one of the last links. “Hmm, a quick email to say hi shouldn’t hurt… just want to see what it’s like, that’s all.” Kris clicked the link and started to write a quick email to ‘’ She couldn’t think of much to really say besides I liked your website, so ended it after a few lines. Once she clicked send, she heard the door to the apartment start to open. Kris quickly clicked the close button on her browser and felt herself blush slightly.

Kris quickly glanced at the clock and figured it was time to get some rest. She closed her laptop and slipped under the covers, enjoying the feeling as her head came to rest on her soft pillows. She felt her eyes start to close, but kept feeling herself drift back to the image on the website… was the diaper soft? Did it feel weird to wear? Does she wet them? Questions kept drifting in and out as she kept wondering to herself why she was thinking about this so much…

Chapter 2: Wandering Thoughts

Kris awoke with a start and quickly opened her laptop, wondering if she had a reply to her email. To her disappointment, her inbox didn’t have any new messages. “Oh well,” she thought. “I guess it is pretty soon.” Kris shrugged and laid back down and curled up in the blanket as she thought about that website again. After a few seconds of wondering, she clicked on Netscape and headed to the site again. She wasn’t as obsessed with the picture this morning (she only looked it five times this morning), and spent a bit of time looking at all the different types on the product page. She couldn’t believe there were so many kinds of diapers. All she had ever though about were Depends, and only old people used those! She rolled her eyes and closed the window as she headed for her morning shower.

On the way, she heard Mary and Jay in the kitchen, probably getting ready for breakfast. Mary must have heard Kris also, since a few seconds later she heard a knock on her door.

“Good morning Kris. We’re making pancakes if you’d like some.” Mary called through the door. Kris was happy she decided not to open the door since she was half undressed for her shower.

“That would be great Mary, I’m starved. Give me a few minutes to shower and get cleaned up?”

“No problem. When Jay cooks, it’s always at least an hour long project. And cleaning up is a two hour one.” Mary giggled. Kris heard something hit the wall next to her, and wondered what kind of food was thrown at Mary for her commentary.

“Okay, I’ll be out in a few then. Thanks Mary!” Kris said as she headed into the bathroom. She was happy that she had an excuse to take a quick shower instead of her usual routine of fourty-five minutes. She turned on the water and finished taking off her pj’s as she waited for the water to warm up. She looked at herself in the bathroom mirror as she waited. She usually liked what she saw, outside of slightly tiny breasts. She had a nice curve to her body, with a narrow waist and nice hips. She also had very smooth skin with only a few freckles, the product of being a relentless moisturizer and a generally indoor person. Her brown hair was combed back for bed, and tumbled down in a mess of loose tangles to her shoulders. She started to see steam creeping up the mirror, and knew the shower was finally warm. She gave herself one last look though, and pictured what she would look like wearing a diaper like the picture of the woman on the diaper site. She blinked a few times and wondered what she was doing. “Okay, maybe I should take a cold shower instead!” She said to her mirrored image.

Her shower was quick though, with a quick rinse of her hair and a quick body wash with her poof. She also used her facial soap, skipping most of her regular routine of skin care ‘potions’. She didn’t want to keep Mary waiting and forced herself to turn off the water instead of lingering to enjoy the warm water pouring down her body. She quickly dried herself off, and combed back her damp hair to keep it out of her face for a bit. She put the back in a quick bun to keep it off her neck as she ate. She walked back into her bedroom, and began rifling through her clothes for something to wear. She opened her underwear draw, and for some reason, opted for a thick pair of cotton panties instead of her usual. She generally wore more ‘sexy’ panties (you never know when they might be handy), but today was just in the mood for something a bit more comforting. She put on the matching bra, along with a pair of black jogging pants and a white tank. She decided she was presentable enough after giving herself a quick look, and headed for the kitchen, laptop in hand.

The kitchen of the apartment was only a kitchen in name. It was big enough to hold two people, and was actually an add-on to the common room. It was placed in between the two bedrooms, at the back of the room. It was open to the room so that people sitting in the den could see the people in the kitchen. The counter that separated the common room and kitchen ended in a small bar, which Kris and Mary had lined with tall chairs. Kris placed her laptop on the edge of the couch in the room and opened it up before going over and sitting at the bar area.

Mary was right that Jay cooking was a project! It looked like food was thrown everywhere, pans were sizzling, and Kris wasn’t sure, but could have sworn she saw pancake batter stuck to the wall by the pantry. Mary and Jay looked like they were up to the their elbows in the mess, and Kris thought she saw a slight dusting of flour over just about everything. Kris laughed softly to herself as she looked at the happy couple. Mary was still in her pajamas, a white cotton set that she bought recently. It was sleeveless, with mini-roses placed all over it. Mary was a truly beautiful woman, with dark Italian skin that just always seemed to be the perfect blend of tan. She was a bit heavier then Kris, with a better defined ass and hips. Her chest was also more pronounced, something Kris was always jealous of. Mary loved her friends though, and was amazingly intelligent. She works as a chemist for the DEA, and loves it. She also had a knack to always hear the most horrible jokes though, and loved telling them!

“Morning guys. Thanks again for making breakfast!” Kris said. From Jay, she only got a few mumbles. It was obvious that breakfast wasn’t going as well as he had hoped. Mary was a little more social, probably enjoying the spectacle of her boyfriend cooking.

“Good Morning Kris. Want to hear the latest joke I heard?”

Kris laughed to herself, already imagining what she had come up with. “Sure, why not.” she said as she shook her head.

“Why is 77 better then 69?”

Kris shook her head again, and could already imagine the answer. “I have no idea.”

“You get 8 more, duh!” Mary said while laughing.

Kris turned bright red and looked at Jay while trying to stop the giggles from coming out. Mary’s laughter soon go to her though, and pretty soon, they were both laughing so hard that the tears were coming out. “That’s really a bad one.” Kris said. She could see Jay hang his head a little bit as he tried to stifle a laugh, having probably heard this one a few times!

Jay was a little harder to figure out then Mary. He was usually pretty quiet whenever he visited, but Mary assured that he was anything but. The two of them usually only have eyes for each other when they visit each other though, so I guess it wasn’t weird that he didn’t really spend any time talking to Kris. He was pretty tall, somewhere near the six-foot range, with deep brown eyes. He was pretty muscular also, and Kris was always amused when she watched him toss Mary up into his arms to carry her somewhere. Kris knew from the way that Mary looked at him that she loved him a lot. She smiled for her friends, and hoped that one day soon she’d be standing in a bridesmaid’s dress.

“So Jay, how cough is breakfast coming along?” Kris asked while trying not to smile.

“Any minute now.” he growled, while a piece of bacon fell off the fork he was using fell to the floor. “Grrrrrrr.”

Kris turned around for a second to look out of the common room window to check the weather, but instead her eyes stopped on her laptop. Her email icon was up, meaning that she received something. “Probably just another ad for Viagra,” she thought to herself as she rolled her eyes. She turned back around to talk to Mary, but her mind kept wandering back to her computer. When it drifted over there though, it was a short step to drifting back to that website too.

She shook her head as Mary laid out some plates and declared that breakfast was ready. Kris acted pretty ditzy during most of it, but fortunately Mary and Jay were occupied with seeing each other that they didn’t notice. Why did she keep thinking about diapers of all things? The pancakes and bacon were actually pretty good, but for the disaster in the kitchen, Kris expected a three course meal! She ate about half her breakfast, and quickly ran to the sink to clean off her plate and put it in the dishwasher.

“Geeze, an hour to cook and she eats it in under ten minutes!” Jay laughed.

“I’m sorry Jay, just a bit out of it today. I think I’m going to go get ready to go jogging to clear my head.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” he said with a wink.

“I’ll make it up to you though, and I’ll clean the kitchen up a little later. If I wait long enough, maybe it’ll be declared a federal disaster area!”

“Ha, ha, ha. Funnnnnnyyyy,” He said with a smile.

“Okay, guess I’ll see you guys later then. Have fun today, and thanks again!” Kris said with a wave as she grabbed her laptop and headed to her bedroom.

Chapter 3: Courage & Confidence

As soon as Kris cleared the door, she swung it shut and ran over to her bed to check her email. When the screen refreshed, she just stared. In the top of her box, an email from She stood looking at it for a few minutes, wondering if she should just delete it. Her heart was racing a little bit at the sight of the email. “Why go jogging when I have diaper thoughts to keep my heart rate up?” She mused. “Okay, it’s just an email, that’s all. You’re not into this or anything.”

Kris clicked on the email and looked over what Court had written:

Hi ya Kristine, thanks for saying you liked my website. I’m always looking for ways to improve it if you have any suggestions. What did you really like about it? I’m glad you wrote, and if you want to talk more, please write again. Or if you want, you can look me up on Aol IM under the name Court_AB.

Hope to hear from you,


Kris briefly eyed her IM screen and saw once again, no one was on. “Hmm, should I add him?” She wondered. She thought for a few minutes, and in the end, decided that it was just an IM conversation. It’s not like he’d know who she was! Kris reached over and added a new buddy to her list: Court_Ab. Kris saw as the name came online. After a few seconds of wondering if this was a good idea, she wrote a quick message to her new buddy.

“Hi there, this is Kris. I wrote you last night.”

After a few seconds, she got a message back. “Hi back. Thanks for compliment on my website. I’m really glad you liked it!” Court wrote back.

“Oh yes. I felt it was great… I have to admit, I was a little nervous when I first started looking at it.”

“Was this the first diaper-oriented site you’ve ever been to?” Court asked.

“Well, yes… I was just browsing last night and stumbled on it.”

“Oh, okay. What did you think?”

“Well, it’s… different. I just keep thinking about what I read, and loved the first picture you have up on the picture page.”

“Oh, thank you, me too! Have you ever tried a diaper or anything like that?”

“Well, no. But I’ve been thinking about it a lot today, and don’t know why,” Kris confessed.

“There’s nothing wrong with it at all. I know society says there is, but what’s wrong with feeling comforted once in a while?”

“Nothing, I guess.” Kris answered

“So why don’t you try it and see? What would it really hurt?”

“No, I couldn’t… I’d look silly! Besides, I don’t have any.”

“I’m sure you’d look great in them. And it’s not hard to get them. You can at any drugstore, and even supermarkets.”

“Oh no, I could never. What would people think?”

“Does it really matter? Have some self-confidence and not worry about it if you’re curious. From what you’ve said so far, I bet you’d enjoy it!” Court typed.

“Well, I just couldn’t… I’d be too embarrassed.”

“You’ve never bought panty liners before?”

“Well, yes, but that’s different.” Kris said after thinking for a second.


“I don’t know, they’re more normal! Women buy them all the time, but we don’t buy diapers.”

“Well, I think you can do it if you’re really curious. Just go early in the day or late when the stores are empty, and just close your eyes, breathe, and go for it!” Court answered.

“Why do you like them?” Kris asked curiously.

“Because I feel at peace in them and I can relax. It’s just me with no worries, not even if I have to go to the bathroom! I can act silly if I want, or play if I want to, and just remember what it was like to be so care-free. I also love sleeping in one, it’s just so comforting being curled up with a thick diaper between your legs keeping you safe. I guess I like to share that with other people.”

“That sounds nice.” Kris answered thoughtfully.

“It is. You should think about it. Remember, just takes a little courage and a little confidence to wear diapers!”

“I’ll remember that. I have to get going… I’m already late for my morning run. Talk to you later?”

“I’d like that, and remember, I’m here if you want to ask me any questions or anything like that, and please come back to my website any time you want.”

“Thanks, I will. Have a good day.” Kris said.

hugs Good luck!” Court said as he signed off.

Good luck with what, Kris wanted to ask. Court’s take on things had Kris smiling during the conversation. Was it really possible? Wouldn’t she be a freak for doing something like this? What if she got caught? And worst of all: What if she liked it?

Courage and confidence.

Chapter 4: Questions and Answers

Kris left the apartment feeling a little overwhelmed by all of these new, and slightly upsetting, emotions. She broke out of the apartment at a dead sprint, running as quick as she could down the paved sidewalk. As she drifted over the streets and passed the other buildings, she kept thinking about everything Court had said. He seemed so ‘okay’ with everything abut himself, and seemed so nice. Her thoughts drifted to Mary, and realized that Jay and Mary were going to be out of the apartment for most, if not all of the day as they try to squeeze in a month of seeing each other into one day. The more she thought about it, the more safe everything seemed. Mary was out, she didn’t really know anyone here yet, so what was the difference?

She turned the corner by an elementary school on her regular circuit. There was a CVS she knew about pretty close the apartment, only a block or two away. It wouldn’t be that big a deal to buy some diapers, would it? “God, I’m over-thinking this way to much,” She said to no one in particular. The phrase ‘Just do it’ kept popping in her head. “Okay, that’s it, I’m a grown woman, I can manage this.”

Kris turned down the next block to start heading over that way. She slowed down a bit to catch her breath and cool down a bit. She could see the drugstore up ahead on the left side of the street, but the closer she got, the slower she ran, until she was eventually doing a slow walk. She could feel her heart racing as she looked at the store and kept trying to think of an excuse to stop from going in. After what seemed an eternity, and Kris thinking things over a few dozen times, she followed an older woman into the store.

Kris quickly learned that her plan of walk in, buy diapers, and walk out wasn’t nearly as easy as she expected it to be. She kept feeling her face warm up as she thought it over, and spent a good bit of time looking at the cosmetics they had. She tried a few different foundations and a lightly shaded blush to make it look like she was in the store for other reasons. She knew that eventually she would have to go over to the diaper section if she was ever going to manage to work up the confidence to buy some though.

After wandering around the aisles for a few more minutes, she finally came to the back of the store, where she saw a section labeled ‘Women’s needs/Incontinence’. She walked down the aisle slowly, feeling herself get a little more light-headed with every step. The aisle was almost completely taken up with female products, and took going to the very back corner of the store to find the section for adult incontinence. She looked at the products briefly before looking away, not wanting to get caught looking at diapers as an adult. She looked down the row of products and didn’t see anyone coming, so decided that she could afford a bit of a better look then that. She knelt down to look at a package of Depends undergarments, with nighttime protection. She read the package, turning it over and over again and wondering why she was so curious about it. She could feel them inside, and how thick them seemed. She felt the desire in her rise a little bit as she held tightly onto the package, almost as if someone would take it away from her. She started to think about buying them, and was pretty happy to see the store relatively empty.

As she turned around to walk to the counter, she saw the lady she followed into the store turn the corner and head down the row of products. She had a cart with a few items in it, including a small pile of Halloween candy. She gave a start at seeing Kris holding the package of depends, but kept walking towards where she was standing.

The woman was in her mid forties, with hair that was deep brown and tied back in a pony tail. She was wearing a pair of simple glasses over her blue eyes that gave her a look of authority. As she came closer, Kris noticed her height. She was easily 5’8", a giant next to Kris’s 5’5". She could feel her skin starting to heat up from embarrassment as the woman walked towards her. She packaged slipped from her grasp as she felt a her hands start to turn slick with worry. Kris knelt down to pick up the diapers, and quickly slipped them on to the shelf, hoping to avoid any more humiliation. “What am I doing,” she said out loud so the other woman could hear, “I thought these were pads.” She finished with a weak smile as she started to turn back towards the front of the store.

The woman gave her a quick look up and down and broke out in a sly smile. “Your first time buying incontinence products, huh?”

Kris attempted to answer, feeling that half the store must have heard the woman’s announcement a second ago. All she could manage was a weak nod as she felt her forehead start to dampen from her nerves.

“Oh, it’s okay sweetie, relax. I’ve been there too!” She said, her smile growing. “I’m Ellen by the way. I know it seems embarrassing your first time buying protection, but it gets easier, and nothing to be ashamed about. I’ve been wearing diapers for about five years now, and think I’m pretty past the ‘shock’ value!”

Kris still felt a bit ashamed that Ellen was talking to her about diapers when she needed them, while Kris was buying them to see what they felt like. Ellen had a magnetic personality though, Kris could tell that already by how she carried herself. She was so comfortable with herself and who she was. Kris felt herself relaxing a bit while looking into the warm smile Ellen gave her. “Thanks, I never imagined it would be this hard,” She stumbled out.

"I know, few people do until they go through it. Is there anything I can help you with?

“I don’t think so, but thanks anyway. I think I’m just going to go,” Kris said as she turned to walk past Ellen.

Ellen laid a hand on her shoulder though and looked into her eyes. “It’ll be okay, trust me. Maybe I can make it a bit easier on you then it was on me!” She took Kris’s hand and led her back to the adult diaper section. “Well, first off, I think you’re a little too small for large! You’d have to used duct tape to hold them up. I see you also picked nighttime protection, so I’m guessing this is more of a nighttime issue?”

Kris went to answer but found that she just couldn’t talk about it. She looked up into Ellen’s eyes, and after a second, felt Ellen squeeze her hand in a way that made Kris feel at peace with what she was doing. She felt Ellen’s acceptance through that brief squeeze. “Well, yes. I just want to make sure that I can sleep through the night without a problem.” Kris said as she lowered her head, slightly ashamed of the small lie she told.

“Okay, so that was a good choice. Depends is a pretty good brand, but always found the Attends to be a generally better product, and if you’re using them for night time use only, I definitely recommend them.” Ellen answered. She kept hold of Kris as she pointed out her choice products.

Kris stared up at the display and at the wide selection. “Well, what size do you think I need?”

“Well, what size are you?”

“A four.” Kris stated proudly.

“Grrr, I’m jealous now!” Ellen laughed. She looked briefly at the selections and settled on a package of small. “Here you go, these are probably the best for your tiny waist.” Ellen handed the package to Kris and kept looking at the various products. After a few seconds, Kris watched her put a package of medium ‘regular’ diapers and a package of large nighttime diapers in the cart.

"Why the different sizes? Kris asked, amazed that she was actually asking a question about diapers to a grown woman in the middle of a drug store. Kris looked up nervously, hoping she didn’t offend Ellen.

Ellen gave another squeeze in answer to the unspoken question. “Well, at night, I like a little more room to sleep in, and if I think it’ll be a heavy night, I can put something in to make them more absorbent so my husband doesn’t end up wet along with me.” Ellen smiled like she was remembering a private moment.

Kris was starting to feel a little worried about lying to Ellen. Ellen was sharing the burden of a real issue with her, one that Kris really couldn’t relate to. She squeezed Ellen’s hand for a second before letting go, as a way to say I’m sorry, even if Ellen didn’t know what for. She looked at the package Ellen had handed to her for a few seconds and decided they were a good choice for her. “Thanks for your help Ellen, I really, really appreciate it.”

“Don’t think anything of it.” Ellen said.

Kris turned to walk down the aisle when Ellen gave a small giggle. “Here, put them in the cart with my things. There is another tip for you. If you want to avoid stares, sometimes it’s good to not being carrying adult diapers in plain sight.”

Kris couldn’t help it as she laughed. “I guess you’re right. I’m not very good at this at all! My name is Kris, I don’t think I mentioned it earlier,” Kris said as she held out a hand.

Ellen took her hand and shook it in greeting. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. Would you like my number in case you need anything else or want to talk or anything?”

Kris could tell that Ellen was enjoying having someone to share this with. She knew it was a bad idea, but felt such an attraction to her kindness that she quickly agreed. Ellen took a pen out of her purse and penned her name and phone number on the back of an old receipt.

“Thank you again Ellen.”

“Stop that, you don’t have to thank me. Like I said, we’ve all been there.” The two women started to head towards the cashier when Ellen stopped for a second. “Oh, btw, I meant to ask you. Since this is your first time, do you have everything else you need?”

Kris turned her head to the side as her eyebrows drew together, wondering what Ellen meant. “Well, I’m not sure. What else do I need?”

Ellen smiled again. “Well, baby powder for one if you want to keep your skin healthy, baby oil too. And I’d definitely recommend some kind of diaper rash cream. Trust me, they’re not fun when they happen!”

Kris shook her head. She hadn’t even thought of any of that stuff! “Okay, where do I get that?”

“You can here if you want to. I’ll show you if you want.”

“I’d like that, thank you.”

“Sure. I think it’s aisle 3 that has what we’re looking for.”

Kris would have expected the products to be near the incontinence section, but found Ellen leading her to the other side of the store. She turned down the aisle and was surprised to be greeted by rows and rows of baby diapers and baby supplies. She looked at all the things there, her thoughts going back to Court’s website and all she had seen there. She felt her knees go a little weak as she followed Ellen down the aisle.

“Okay, here we go. Johnson’s baby powder, baby oil, and diaper rash cream. You should actually put on a little of the rash cream whenever you go to bed to help prevent rashes from happening. That’s definitely the best way to deal with them,” Ellen said as she frowned. Kris definitely saw that she was speaking from experience. “Well, I think that’s everything you need to start out with. Can you think of anything else you might need?”

“You’re asking me? You already saw that I don’t have this all thought out yet.” Kris laughed. Her eyes kept drifting though, over to the other baby items. She looked at a larger baby bottle for a few seconds before moving on, afraid Ellen would notice her interest. They walked to the end of the aisle and to the cashiers, with Kris feeling a little loss at leaving the row of baby supplies. “Geeze, what is wrong with me today,” She said softly to herself.

“What was that?” Ellen asked

“Oh, nothing.”

After a few seconds of waiting on line, the two women came up to the front and began unloading supplies. Kris felt her face heat again as the cashier began ringing up Ellen’s items. Ellen however looked calm and collected, as if nothing in the world was wrong. Kris admired that in her, and hoped she was right that it does get easier. She couldn’t imagine it, but hoped it was true… she couldn’t imagine that she’d have made it through this without Ellen helping her. It was soon Kris’s turn to be wrung up, and after a few seconds and no comments, laughter, or finger pointing, she paid the cashier and got her things. Ellen stopped her from taking them, asking the cashier to please double bag them. Kris noticed that Ellen’s were double bagged as well.

Ellen leaned over and whispered “So people that you don’t want to know won’t see what’s in the bags.” She gave a little wink to Kris, happy that she was able to share another secret of adult diapering.

“Thank you again Ellen. I can’t say that enough!” Kris said as she picked up her bag.

“Well, thank you for talking to me. I enjoyed meeting you.”

“Ditto that. Take care, and I’ll call you sometime.”

“Okay, and if not, we’ll always have the diaper aisle!” Ellen laughed.

“How true! Take care,” Kris said as she walked outside.

Chapter 5: First feelings

Kris broke into a dead run with her package as soon as she stepped out into the early morning sunlight. The short trip back was a blur, with Kris’s long legs carrying her over the pavement at a quick sprint. She bounded up the steps to her apartment, taking them two at a time, the package from CVS trailing behind. As she approached the door to her apartment she slowed down to catch her breath, and to make sure the coast was clear. She walked to the door and tried to open it, feeling relieved when she felt the deadbolt in place. With a sly, secretive smile, she slipped her key into the lock and tapped the door open with her foot. She threw the package on the ground as she slammed the door behind her and relocked the deadbolt, feeling safe for the first time since buying the package of diapers.

Once she did one last quick look for Mary and Jay, she picked up the bag and ran quietly into her room as she closed the door. She tossed the package by her bed as she rested against the back of her bedroom door. She took a few cleansing breaths as she tried to relax and keep her heart from jumping out her chest. Her eyes kept drifting to the package though, and soon she was kneeling on the floor, staring as if this was some lost treasure, the contents of which could be anything! She just kept looking at the wording on the package over and over again, imagining herself trying one of the diapers on, feeling her heart quicken a little.

“Okay, just trying this out to see what it feels like, no big deal. No one will ever know, and I’m sure I’ll wear it for a few minutes and get sick of it, and that’ll be the end of it,” She muttered to herself, trying to make it sound convincing. She looked at the package again, and slowly started to open the top. The sight of the white diapers lined up shook her for a second, as she touched the row to see what they felt like. The plastic outside crinkled as she ran her hand down the line, bringing a sense of giddiness to her. She slowly drew one out and started to open it, looking strangely at the blue stripe running in between the legs. As she opened it, she felt the elastic in the middle and the soft cotton in the middle, her eyes going wide at the sight of it unfolded.

She slowly drew her eyes away, and started looking at her other purchases. She opened the baby powder and was greeted with a small puff of it flying into the air. Kris breathed in the scent as it came up, feeling herself drift a little bit. She had always loved the smell of baby powder, and was happy to become lost in the fragrance. A smile crept across her face as she closed it, as the anticipation of using it started to build. Next came the baby oil, with Kris just glancing at it as she placed it on her nightstand. When she was younger, Kris used to rub baby oil into her skin all the time to keep it smooth, even though her older brothers used to make fun of her for it. She smiled at the memory as she went back to sit on the floor. “Silly boys,” she said to herself as she laughed. The last item was the diaper rash cream. Kris thought for a moment, and figured that she wouldn’t need that since she wasn’t really going to be using the diapers. She took the tube and tossed it into the small garbage can that sat in the corner of the room.

She turned her head back to the diaper, wondering if there was anything else she had to do. She slowly admitted to herself that she was trying to come up with excuses, putting off trying the diaper on for as long as she could. “Okay,” she started with a quick breathe, “try it on, feel silly, take it off, the end.” She picked it up off the floor and laid it on her bed. Kris tossed off her sneakers as she untied her jogging pants, and slowly shook them down her legs until she could step out of them. She put her hands on her hips and slowly trailed them down her body, pulling off the cotton underwear she had put on earlier. She sat on the edge of the bed and took off her socks, and tossed them into her laundry basket at the foot of her bed. She stood up and looked at herself in the mirror, stripped down to just her white tank top. She took a second to imagine what the diaper would feel like around her again, and then slowly headed to where the diaper was laying to really find out.

Kris looked at it briefly, wondering what she was supposed to do. She was the youngest child and had never diapered anyone before. She went over and slowly opened the diaper all the way, looking at the different parts to it. From looking at the package, she figured out the tapes had to go at the back when putting it on. She nodded to herself as if to confirm it, and after taking a deep breath, she slowly sat down in the middle of the diaper. She felt the front and back of the diaper start to come up as she sat in the middle of it, feeling it against her skin for the first time. She was also enthralled with the sound the diaper made when she moved, the crinkle bringing a slight smile to her face. The elastic felt a little strange rubbing against her inner thighs though, Kris wondering why they made it like that. She started drawing the front of the diaper up between her legs, and couldn’t believe the sensations she was feeling as she felt herself being diapered. When it was up to her stomach, she looked at herself and was amazed at the sight of the diaper covering her up. She reached behind and pulled up the back, and slowly, one by one, began fastening the tapes.

When the last one was taped, she rolled onto her back and moved around a little, feeling the diaper all around her. Kris noticed the warmth building up inside the diaper almost immediately, as she continued to roll around on her padded butt. “So that’s why babies get so grumpy in the summer sometimes,” she thought as she giggled to herself. The warmth felt amazing to her though, and noticed that other things were getting warm as well. She blushed when she realized it, trying to figure out how a diaper was turning her on. She rolled over onto her tummy, and almost jumped when she felt the diaper push against her sensitive areas. She lifted her hips for a second and came back down, enjoying the feeling as the diaper pressed against her. She was soon wiggling all over the bed, feeling the different ways the diaper touched her skin… along with other things. She rolled over again onto her back, and ran her hands over her face and hair, as if asking herself what she was doing.

She sat up and looked across the room at the mirror, and couldn’t believe the sight that greeted her. She looked like a child with a t-shirt and diaper on. She stood up and kept looking at herself, and felt so young, and so safe. She ran her hands along the diaper, feeling it around her, and felt herself day dreaming about what things were like when she was a baby. She put her arms around herself and gave a little squeeze, lost in memory for a little bit. She slowly wandered back over to her bed and pulled back the covers. She slipped in between the sheets and pulled the comforter back over and her and curled up, feeling exhausted all of the sudden. The diaper crinkled a little as she moved around, bringing a lazy smile to her face. She felt her eyes slowly start to close, as she pulled one of her pillows over to her and held it close to her, imagining for all the world that it was her teddy bear, her protector while she slept.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 6: Shame?

Kris slowly woke a few hours later, the pillow still clutched in her arm. “Mmmm, what a good nap,” she thought as she looked at the clock on her nightstand. She stretched her arms out and yawned softly with her eyes closed as she flipped the covers off. She started to put her feet on the floor when a soft sound caused her eyes to fly open. She looked between her legs and saw the diaper resting between them. Slowly, the memories came back to her as she flopped back down onto her pillows. She felt the bulk of the diaper between her legs again, and just laughed at herself for being so silly. “Guess it was too good of a nap,” she said while grinning.

She eyed her laptop for a second and thought of writing Court, but decided to wait till a little later, Kris not wanting to bother him too much. She paced about her room for a few seconds, looked at herself in the mirror to once again take in the sight of her in a diaper, and walked into her bathroom. She turned on the faucet and put her hand under, and was greeted with a small need to relieve herself. She squeezed her legs together for a second as she splashed some cold water on her face, trying to get the rest of the sleepiness out of her. After drying off, she glanced at the toilet for a second, thinking about what she should do. She eyed the diaper thoughtfully, and shook her head. “No, that’s too much. I’m not going to be that much of a perv,” she said to herself. In the end, she figured she would be okay for a while, so no sense in taking off the diaper if she didn’t have to.

She wandered back into her room, still amazed at how warm the diaper around her made her feel. She reached into the diaper and felt her tummy, and was surprised to see a little bit of sweat was there. She felt a little gross when she rubbed her hand on her tank to dry it off, and it dawned on her what the problem was. “Baby powder,” she explained, “How could I have forgotten that?” She knelt down on the floor where the bottle of baby powder was resting from earlier, and she opened the top. Once again, she breathed in the scent and felt herself become lost in it. After a second or two, she came back to the real world and opened the front of the diaper. She turned the bottle upside to pour some in, and was surprised by the rush of baby powder that fell into her diaper. She quickly flipped the bottle upright, but not before a small dusting of it drifted up from the diaper and settled on her. Kris blushed at her own stupidity, and quickly closed the baby powder and placed it on the nightstand with the baby oil. She reached into the diaper and started rubbing the powder around, hoping that it would help keep her a little bit dryer. She covered her tummy quickly and her private areas, and was shocked to see how sensitive she was to her touch as she brushed the powder over herself. Her eyes looked at the bed quickly, but decided that it was much to early (not to mention, too weird) to be thinking about that!

Kris swished (her new word for the diaper crinkling) over to her door and listened for a moment, wondering if Mary had returned at some point with Jay in tow. She didn’t hear any sounds coming through the apartment, so she opened the door a crack and peered through. She saw that the door to the apartment was still locked with the deadbolt, and that everything was still where she left it from the morning. She glanced at the kitchen with a loud sigh, remembering her promise earlier to clean up Jay’s breakfast disaster area.

With the apartment empty, she opened the door and walked towards the kitchen, taking stock of what needed to be done. She had a wicked smile across her face, feeling that she was being just a bit naughty, cleaning the kitchen up dressed as she was. She laughed to herself, enjoying the feeling of the diaper around her as she bent over to pick things off the floor and moved about the kitchen. She kept feeling the urge to go to the bathroom every time she turned on the water, but that was pretty normal for her. She kept pondering that question over and over in her mind as she worked. “Wetting a diaper seemed a little bit extreme for someone just wanting to feel what a diaper was like, wasn’t it?” she thought.

She became very pre-occupied with this question as she worked, the pressure between her legs a silent reminder that she should come up with an answer. She considered everything that Court had said earlier, about having a little self confidence in yourself. “Is it confidence or just sick to want to wet in a diaper,” she thought to herself. Her eyes went wide with that revelation. She wanted to wet in the diaper. Kris felt dumbstruck for a moment, trying to figure out where these strange feelings were coming from. She grabbed on of the kitchen rags as she started to wipe down the counter, her eyes continuing to look down between her legs.

Kris just couldn’t think of a good reason not to wet the diaper. For all that she wondered why she wanted to, she just couldn’t think of how anything could be hurt by using a diaper for what it was meant for. She knew she wanted the full experience of wearing one, and one time wouldn’t make a difference, would it? Kris could feel the need to go getting stronger, and that decided it for her. She put her hand between her legs just for curiosity, and stopped clenching her muscles. She closed her eyes and pushed slightly, imagining what a wet diaper will feel like.

After a few seconds, Kris opened her eyes, not understanding why she couldn’t go in the diaper. She definitely felt the pressure building between her legs, but couldn’t quite get herself to let go. As she closed her eyes to try again, all thoughts of wetting went out of her head. She heard the sound of keys being juggled outside of the door, and a few seconds later, the sound of a key sliding into the deadbolt of the apartment. Her eyes going wide, she dashed out of the kitchen into her room, the door closing with a loud slam, just as the door to the apartment swung open.

“Krissssss, we’re home,” she heard Mary call from the common room. “Why was the door locked?”

“Oh, well, I got a little too sweaty while jogging earlier,” Kris thought quickly, “so decided to take another shower and didn’t want to leave the door open.”

“Oh, okay,” Mary answered. “Why’d you run out of here when we came in?”

“Well, my hair is still wet and didn’t want Jay to see me like that twice in one day,” She stated, cringing at how lame the excuse sounded even to her.

Mary just laughed for a second. “Were you dancing around the apartment naked again? I tell ya Jay, every time I go out I come home to this!”

Kris couldn’t help but break out in giggles at Mary’s comment, even as nervous as she was. “Well, you know on the weekends how I like to cut loose!”

“Well, if you want us, we’ll be in my room,” Mary answered while laughing. “Who knows, maybe we’ll do some dancing too.”

Kris just shook her head at Mary’s candor. You could always count on her to take a possibly awkward situation and add some humor to it. Kris couldn’t help but be amazed at her self esteem and view of her sexuality. Mary just had so much more of a positive outlook of herself and proud body image than Kris did, and being in a diaper while talking to her wasn’t helping matters! Kris heard the door to Mary’s room close, and let out a loud, relaxing breath as she collected herself, ashamed that she almost got caught wearing a diaper in the apartment.

A sharp pain brought her back from her relief, realizing that she still had a problem. She eyed the bathroom and thought of just going and getting it over with. She looked at herself in the mirror, at the diaper wrapped around her. “Why can’t I do this?” She thought to herself. As she stared at her image, she started to see deeper into herself, at the part of her that wanted to be taken care of once in a while, the part that didn’t always have to be strong, independent, and in control. She realized that she had to let go of her grip a little bit, and embrace what she was doing not as an odd, perverted activity, but one that brought comfort to her.

Kris gave herself one more look in the mirror and closed her eyes. She gasped when she felt a warmness spreading between her legs and around her middle, and felt herself bend her knees a little to help. The feelings were indescribable to her as she relaxed and felt the wetness spread, a small, wicked smile spreading across her lips at what she was doing. The small trickle slowly grew as she squatted down, blessedly lost in the sensations that were coursing through her body. As the stream slowed to a stop, she stood up and smiled. “This may have to be more then a one time thing,” she thought secretively to herself.

Chapter 7 - Hope

Kris could feel that she had thoroughly wet the diaper. She could feel it sag down a little, the curve of her hips doing more to keep the diaper up then the tapes on the side. The top one actually looked like it was going to let go under the pressure! She wondered if she would be okay moving around, hoping not to have any leaks in her room. After a few test steps and a little ass shaking with no incidents, Kris felt safe enough. She walked over and gingerly sat down on her bed, feeling the wetness spread around as she settled in.

She clicked open her laptop and quickly went to her IM buddy list, hoping that Court would be online so she could share this with someone. She saw that he had an away message up, leaving her to surf the web alone. She did a few searches for other diaper sites, and couldn’t believe with the sheer number that existed. She browsed these quickly, amazed at all the information that she was finding. Tips, stories, friends and groups, pictures, and even sites selling diaper items. One in particular caught her attention, a site that had a line of clothing for ‘diaper enthusiasts.’ She couldn’t believe what she saw. Footed sleepers? Onesies? Baby print shirts? She found herself looking over the items a number of times, trying to imagine someone wearing them. She laughed softly to herself, and then rolled her eyes, realizing that she was the one currently wearing a wet diaper. She giggled again and typed in the web address for Court’s site.

She browsed his website for a few minutes, still feeling captivated by the picture of the woman in the diaper. It felt good to know that she wasn’t alone in this, and knowing the feelings she had were shared. She started to read a bit of ‘Court’s Story’, a brief outline to how he got started in diapers. It was a cute story though, and one Kris felt she could relate to. She was practically living the story at the moment! She liked Court’s writings though, and felt that he had a kind heart to want to help others to accept themselves.

As Kris went to click on the ‘About Court’ link, she saw his screen name return from away.

“Hey there,” Kris typed. “Having a good day?”

“Not bad, kind of boring!” Court answered. “How has yours been?”

“Well, interesting would probably be the best word.”

“Omg, you went out and bought some, didn’t you?”

“Yyyyessssss,” Kris answered truthfully, feeling slightly embarrassed for some reason.

“Wow, I can’t believe it!” Court typed

“Why not? You didn’t think buying diapers was a big deal this morning!” Kris answered, wondering why Court was so surprised.

“Even thinking that, it took me a loooonnnnggggg time to get up the nerve. I’m amazed it took you one morning.” Court said

“Well, I figured, why not? I didn’t want to drive myself insane wondering what it was like,” Kris typed while giggling.

“So how’d it go?”

Kris wrote to him about the whole saga of the drugstore, of her nervousness, and Ellen’s kindness to the rescue. She couldn’t help but smile, remembering the two of them, both grown women, discussing diapers in the middle of a CVS. She couldn’t believe it, but she even wrote about her feelings and experiences when she got home, and tried on one of the diapers.

“Sounds like you had a positive first experience, and you got through it which always helps! I hope you’re not feeling too overwhelmed.” Court typed in answer to the drama Kris presented him with.

“Well, not really. Okay, a bit I think. This still seems a little surreal!”

“I’m here to talk if you need to. As you can imagine, I’m not very judgmental!” Court quipped.

“That would be nice. I’m just glad I had someone to share this all with. I think I would go nuts if I couldn’t!”

“I’m sure! But as you’ve probably seen, there are plenty of us out there to talk to.”

Kris thought about that comment for a moment before answering. “I know that, but you calm me somehow, and we’ve only talked twice!” She could almost see Court laughing at her on the other end of the computer, at her over emotional self.

“I’m glad you feel that way. I feel a great connection with you. I rarely, if ever give out my IM id to anyone! There was something I liked about your email though.” Court typed.

Kris almost felt giddy from the comment, unsure of why she had such a strong connection to Court. It felt natural to her to talk to Court, and couldn’t understand how she was so open with her feelings during their conversation. “Would you like to meet sometime?” Kris typed, hitting the enter key as quickly as possible to make sure she couldn’t erase it. She was breaking one of her cardinal rules, meeting someone from the internet. Somehow though, with Court, the worries about safety went out the window.

“I’d love to,” Court answered quickly. A wave of relief went through Kris, happy that Court decided to stop talking to her then and there as she guessed he would. “How about tomorrow for coffee at Cindy’s coffee house?”

“I’m not sure where that is. I’m pretty new to the area.” Kris answered.

“Oh, I figured you’d know all the spots! Well, Cindy’s is easy to find. It’s right off of Terry road, by the corner of Mainstreet.”

“That doesn’t sound too hard.” Kris said, wondering if this really was a good idea.

“How does eleven sound?”

“Peachy! How will I know who you are?” Kris asked.

“Peachy? I haven’t heard that in a long time,” Court wrote back. “Well, I’ll be wearing a pair of jeans with a white top, have a dark red hair color, and green eyes. I’ll bring a bag from CVS with me in honor of your day. And if worse comes to worse, I’ll have my cell with me. I’ll email you the number tonight.”

“Sounds great! So I’ll see you tomorrow?” Kris typed as her breath caught.

“Sure thing. Goddess bless!” Court typed as he went offline.

Kris just collapsed onto her bed, wondering what had gotten into her that she was meeting a stranger over the internet. She couldn’t help imagining what tomorrow would bring though, and she hoped that the connection the two ‘diaper friends’ had would be as strong in person. She smiled as she went to remove the wet, and getting cold diaper. Throughout the night, she tried to act normal as she ate dinner with the two lovers, but couldn’t help but watch the clock, counting down the time until she could go to sleep. The sooner that happened, the sooner she’d meet Court. And who knows, maybe soon she’d have someone to inconvenience her roommate with!


Chapter 8: A lunchtime of surprises

Kris awoke with a start, her eyes looking to the window to greet the new day. She felt an immediate sense of excitement as her lunch date with Court was coming closer. She jumped out of bed and went over to the window to look outside. It was pretty sunny outside, with a few clouds here and there. Definitely her kind of day to enjoy. She went to her laptop briefly to check her email and the weather report, and after reading the expected temperatures for the day, decided on a pair of jeans and a lime green, button down blouse. The blouse always looked incredible on her, just accenting her hips enough. Kris generally liked fairly conservative outfits, and figured that this was a nice blend of style and attitude. “Hmm, of course, I’m meeting someone into diapers, so maybe a bib would be a better thing to wear,” she thought to herself with a laugh.

After a brief stop in the bathroom to get ready for day, including a little sprinkle of baby powder that she thought Court would appreciate, Kris stepped out of her bedroom. A sly, knowing smile came to Mary’s face as soon as she saw Kris. “Hmmm, and what are we up to today, and who is he?” She asked with a smirk.

Kris tilted her head, amazed that Mary would pick up on this so quickly as usual. That was the problem with having an entirely too smart roommate. “Oh, nobody,” Kris said while slightly blushing.

“Uh huh, does this nobody have a name?” Mary replied sarcastically.

“Court. I met him over the internet a while ago and decided it was time we met up,” Kris answered, feeling slightly guilty at how she bent the truth. After all, the definition of while was open to interpretation.

“You’re going to a public place, right?” Mary said, her voice becoming more serious.

“Of course, and I should be home by one or two. If I don’t show up by then or don’t call, you know what to do.” Kris said. “And if you need to, I have an email from him in my account.”

“Sounds good, just be safe. You never know what you’re going to run into on the internet”

It took all of her effort not to break out laughing. Mary didn’t even know the half of it! “I will Mom, thanks!” Kris said with a smile. “How’d you know I was meeting someone?”

“Well, let’s see. You’re dressed up on a Sunday, which never happens. You’re usually in your pajamas until after noon at least. I know I haven’t seen you in church lately, so I knew that wasn’t it. Add all that up, plus that fact that you must have checked the time twenty times last night!” Mary said in summary.

“Geeze, didn’t know I was that obvious,” Kris stated.

“It’s okay,” Mary opened. “Have fun today, and hope he’s cute!”

“We’ll see. I’m not really looking for anyone right now anyway,” Kris said as she looked at the time. “I’m going to get going. I want to stop at the bookstore before heading over to meet Court. Oh, by the way, we’ll be at Cathy’s coffee house.”

“Oh, good pick. I love their frozen drinks.” Mary said. “See ya later.”

“Bye!” Kris said as she grabbed her pocketbook while heading outside.

The day was incredible, the feeling of the semi-brisk air waking up Kris quickly. It was almost time to start wearing a jacket Kris decided while rubbing her arms to keep them warm. She walked down towards Mainstreet, and saw one of her favorite destinations. She entered ‘The Wild Rose’ bookstore, a tiny, out of the way place that always had the most interesting books. The owner was a middle aged woman named Diane. She wore her short, curly dirty-blonde hair free flowing as usual. She was intimidating to Kris when she first started coming to the store, but now couldn’t imagine such a thing. Diane always had a warm smile for Kris when she came in, and called her one of her daughters since they saw each other so often.

“Morning little Miss, how are you today?” Diane asked in greeting.

“Just peachy,” Kris answered. “Just browsing today to waste a little bit of time. Anything special come in?”

“Not lately, or nothing worth mentioning. There is a new book which contains a set of essays from Eastern European women and how their lives are going, but that’s about it.”

“Not in the mood for that today. Maybe something a little lighter.” Kris said. “I’ll find something, I always do somehow.”

“Well, let me know if I can help.” Diane said as she turned back towards the shelf she was working at when Kris came in.

Kris wandered for a bit but couldn’t quite find anything to interest her. She checked her regular spots - romance, fantasy, social, and even the comic section. After an exasperated breath, she decided that it wasn’t her day when she walked past the children’s display. She noticed on the bottom shelf, a copy of ‘Goodnight Moon’, one of her favorite books from when she was a child. She grinned slightly as she picked it up and thumbed through it. The price was pretty cheap, so she picked it up and headed to the cash register, which Diane was just returning to. She felt a little silly buying this book, but after yesterday’s ordeal, this was nothing! She put it on the counter and opened her pocket book, waiting for Diane to ring it up.

“Oh, I used to love reading this book to my kids when they were little.” Diane explained.

“That’s funny, I used to love having it read to me!” Kris said with a laugh.

“How could I charge my daughter for this book? Go ahead and enjoy dear.” Diane said with a smile

Kris’s eyebrows went up in surprise. “Thank you, but I couldn’t…”

She was cut off by Diane shaking her head. “Listen, I’ve been around too long for someone to tell me when I can or cannot give a present. I’d love for you to take it.”

Kris just shook her head and smiled. “Why are you so nice to me?”

“Let’s just say I see something in you.” Diane said with a secretive wink.

Kris took her newly acquired book and folded it up and placed it in her pocket book. “That was a pleasant surprise,” she thought with a bright smile. Kris checked her watch and decided it was okay for her to head to the coffee house, hoping to be seated before Court arrived so he would have to find her. She did a quick walk over to the coffee house, and took in her surroundings after stepping through the threshold. The interior was dimly lit to give people a little privacy. Comfortable-looking couches and chairs were scattered throughout the room They had a deep magenta upholstery, with cushions that looked like they could just swallow someone. A soft jazz tune could be heard overlaying all the various conversations going on around, and two workers were behind the counter filling orders. She could see a small library of books and newspapers snuggled in the back corner.

Kris looked at the various people sitting around and didn’t notice anyone that looked like the description Court had given the previous night. She went to the counter and ordered a frozen caramel mocha (on Mary’s recommendation), and picked out a table towards the back of the coffee house. The table had two sofa chairs around it which Kris figured would be perfect. She grabbed a book off the shelf in passing to read while she waited. Kris’s eyes would jump every time she heard the door open, but was always disappointed to see that it wasn’t Court. She let out a loud sigh as she continued to flip through the book she had picked up.

At 11:05, Kris began to wonder if she was going to be stood up. She hadn’t felt this vulnerable about someone in a long time now. What was it about Court she wondered to herself. As she gave up hope and decided that she wasn’t going to bother waiting around, she heard the door creak open. She saw the person was wearing blue jeans, and Kris saw a white top accompanying them. Then her jaw dropped open as she buried her nose in the book she had. She slowly peeked over the top of the book and so a beautiful woman with red hair coming in. Kris blushed when the pieces started to fit, as she slunk down farther into the chair. It was Court - ney. Her hair was put back in a pony tail reveling beautiful features, centering around a pair of enrapturing eyes. Kris felt as though she could become lost as she looked on, in the spirit and drive she saw in them. She felt as though she’s seen Court before, but couldn’t quite put her finger on where.

Court did a quick walk through the interior of the store, probably hoping someone would speak up. Kris averted her eyes when she walked by, still trying to sort out the shock of seeing Court. As she watched Court take one last look through the store and prepare to sit at another table, Kris spoke up and raised her hand, calling Court over to her. Court visibly brightened when she spotted Kris, and quickly stepped over to where she was sitting. As she came near, Kris stood up to be polite and invited Court to join her.

“Hey, it’s nice to meet you,” Court said while smiling. She looked at a shocked Kris for a few moments when realization started to sink in. “You weren’t expecting me, were you?”

“Well, no, not exactly. I thought you were a guy with your email address name.” Kris said sheepishly.

“Oh my. You didn’t read the about me page on my website, huh?” Court asked, feeling concerned.

“No, I just assumed you were male for some reason. It seemed like most of the sites out there were run by guys, you know?” Kris said, feeling very uncomfortable.

“Don’t I know it,” Court said with a small smile. “I’m so sorry, I never thought to mention this to you. I kind of figured you were a woman with the tone of your email. It’s one of the reasons I wanted to meet you!”

“I feel like an idiot,” Kris said while laughing, trying to make the best of the situation. Court had gone from a calming presence to a definite heart-pounding one!

“I’m sorry again. But we can still have a cup of coffee and talk if you want.”

“I’d like that,” Kris said with a nervous smile. “I’ve heard of men pretending to be women to meet people online, but didn’t think the reverse could happen!” Kris broke out in a series of giggles at the situation she was in.

“It wasn’t intentional!” Court answered while laughing. “Well, if nothing else, you have a good story to tell your friends when you get home!” Court looked off for a second, as if thinking about something and suddenly looked confused. “Hey, didn’t you say you liked my picture up on my website?”

The realization struck Kris. That’s where she recognized Court from. The picture that started all of this, that got her to buy diapers and try them on, the picture that got her to go out and meet a stranger from the internet, was a picture of Court. Her breaths became shallow as she looked at Court and the second large shock of the morning settled over her. Court was over by here a few seconds later, rubbing her back and whispering for her to calm down and it was okay. Kris felt herself blank out for a second, and then came crashing back into her body a few moments later, feeling more at peace. She reached up and touched Court’s arm. “Thank you, I’m okay now.”

Court returned to her chair, a look of concern still on her face. “I still can’t believe this.” She said while shaking her head. “So you don’t know much about me, huh?”

“Well, a bit,” Kris answered, “but mainly just from our conversations.”

Court blushed slightly, and Kris could see that she felt uncomfortable all of the sudden. “What’s wrong?” Kris asked.

“Oh, nothing. I’ll tell you later if you want.” Court said, her smile returning. “So tell me about your day yesterday. Was it something you thought positively about overall?”

“It was definitely an experience. I was surprised that I felt a little bit of loss when I went back to my regular underwear for dinner and bed,” Kris stated.

“That’s understandable. They make you feel kind of safe for a while, don’t they?” Court said nodding.

“Definitely! That wasn’t something I expected at all.”

“Most people don’t expect a lot of what they feel the first time they wear a diaper,” Court said with a large smile. “You can bet that I never expected I’d still be enjoying them years later!”

Kris started to relax a bit, letting Court’s soft voice take some of the worry from her. She was happy to see that Court could be as calming in person as on the internet! “How did you get started?”

“Well, that’s a bit of a long story, but I knew I had a desire to wear them from when I was younger. Years later, one of my partners helped me and encouraged me to explore my fantasies and to not be ashamed of them. I tried a few interesting things that year!” Court laughed.

“I can’t imagine something more ‘out there’ then this is!” Kris said, joining Court’s laughter.

“Oh, you’d be surprised,” Court said. “I’ll tell you some other time I think.”

“Are you sure? You listened to me talk all about yesterday. Definitely your turn to do some talking!” Kris said with an evil grin.

Court took a deep breath. “Well, wasn’t something I expected! I figured you had looked over my entire website. I’m a gay woman. I thought you were also since you wrote me and then asked me to meet you.” Court looked up into Kris’s eyes with a nervous smile. Kris felt her eyes getting wider and wider as she looked on. “I kind of thought this was too lucky. Another gay woman who enjoyed the comfort of diapers and living only twenty minutes away. When you said you were expecting a guy, I almost collapsed!”

Kris couldn’t help but laugh, remember how she felt when she figured out that Court was the woman sitting across from her. Kris reached over the table and touched Court’s arm. “I’m sorry I didn’t do my homework and put you in this situation.”

“It’s okay, seems to be a mutual mess up. I should have known when you didn’t know about this place. It’s a pretty frequent hangout spot for the lesbian community, and even new people know it usually.” Court answered.

Kris felt herself step back for a second, thinking things over. Kris felt an amazing bond with Court despite her sex, and had from the first moment she saw the picture of her on the website. The brief conversations had only cemented that, Kris realizing that the two had such a good connection. She looked at Court again, at the spirit and aura that was her. Kris had thought of being with another woman before, but never thought of acting on those feelings. But here were her feelings staring straight back at her in the form of Court, a young, passionate woman. The bond of being diapered may have brought them to meet, but something deeper was pulling them together.

Kris looked once more to where Court was sitting watching her in obvious wonder. Kris reached over with her hand and ran it down the side of Court’s face, the smooth skin slightly enticing her. Kris leaned forward and softly kissed Court on the lips, and was happy when Court answered with a small one of her own. Both women knew what the kiss meant. It was a promise by Kris to see where their bond took them and to be open with her feelings, and a promise by Court to be patient and to realize that this may not come to anything. But mostly, it was a celebration of two sisters that had feelings for each other.

Sisterhood is powerful.

Chapter 9 - Feelings

Court pulled back from the kiss, her eyes wide with the wonder of it all. Kris could see a slight blush tint her cheeks, obviously surprised by the turn the afternoon had taken. “Thank you,” she managed in a whisper, “I wasn’t expecting that at all. I hope it was okay with you.”

Kris laughed softly. “What are you apologizing for? I pulled you over to me.”

“I know,” Court said, the blush becoming slightly deeper. “I hope you enjoyed it at least.”

“I think I did,” Kris answered quietly as she ran her hand through her hair. She took her eyes off of Court’s for a second, and saw the room full of people around her. What had they thought of what they saw? She watched as two women stood waiting to order at the counter, their arms entwined around each other. Her eyes went wide as the reality of what happened suddenly came down upon her. “I think I have to…” she trailed off.

“Think about it, I understand.” Court said. “Well, why don’t we skip lunch today and talk later in the week? If you want to of course.”

“That sounds great. I’m sorry for the mix up today.” Kris said as she pulled her purse off the chair and pulled it up to her shoulder.

“It’s okay, it was definitely different!” Court said with a laugh. “Well, you have my number, call if you want to talk or anything, okay?”

“That sounds good. I’ll be in touch.” Kris said. She knew if she walked out, Court wouldn’t be able to find her. All she had was a pretty anonymous email address from her. Kris looked down at where Court still sat, and tried to take in everything that had happened in the afternoon. She felt Court’s hand touch her leg softly, a way of giving the little bit of comfort she could. Kris smiled as she walked towards the door and into the sunlight.

Kris stood outside for a few seconds, feeling the breeze wash over her and the sun stroking her face. She took a deep breathe, her thoughts going through her feelings over and over again. She turned towards home and took a few steps, but found herself standing by the window for a few moments, looking in at where Court stood by another table occupied by two other women. By the way her hands were moving as she spoke, she was pretty excited. Kris smiled despite herself. She shook her head in wonderment, took another quick breath of the cool air around her, and then started off back home.

The walk didn’t do her head very much good though. The more she thought, the more confusing everything from the morning seemed. She felt like she was going in circles over and over again, but in the middle was always the kiss they had shared.

Before she knew it, she was approaching the front steps to the apartment. She looked for a few seconds, surprised by how quickly she made it back. She started to feel her limbs grow heavy, more from worry then the walk home. She limped up the steps to the apartment, her legs not wanting to cooperate very much with her.

When she opened the door, she saw Mary and Jay sitting together on the couch, hand in hand. They were slightly sunk into the soft cushions, the main reason Mary and Kris had bought this couch. The television was on, and from the blank look on Mary’s face, Jay had picked what was on. Mary’s eyes lit up when she saw Kris coming in, and Kris could almost see the litany of questions she was coming up with.

“Hey you two, I’m pretty tired, and think I’m going to get some rest,” Kris said, as she hurried past the couch, hoping to avoid talking about the morning, the last thing she felt like doing.

Mary shook her head a second, wondering what was going on. She bounced out of the couch, and followed Kris to her bedroom door. “Hey, how’d everything go?” She asked, her eyebrows drawn together. “Are you okay?”

“I am, just really tired like I said. Can we talk later?” Kris started to open the door, and stopped with a jerk when she saw the package of diapers still laying on the floor in the middle of her room. She wanted to slap her head for her stupidity in leaving them out.

Mary had stepped closer, expecting to go into the room following Kris. They had always shared almost everything, especially about dating and things like that. “I guess so, if you want to.” Mary stated with a cold look. Kris could see the hurt spreading across her face, along with something else. Concern maybe?

“I’m really okay, just have to think about a few things if that’s okay.”

“Okay, well, I guess we’ll see you later then.” Mary said as she drifted back to the couch. Kris saw her watching as she slipped the door open a crack and slid into her room, the door closing quickly behind her.

Kris took a deep breath, happy to be alone for a little bit. She sagged against the door, feeling slightly ashamed that she had hurt Mary. “I’m sorry Mary,” she whispered to the door, “I’ll make it up to you later, I promise.”

Kris eyed her bed longingly, and started a slow walk towards it as she began stripping off her clothes. She let her pants and blouse fall to the floor as she unhooked her bra, happy to feel less constricted and less closed in. The events of the morning kept tugging at her mind, and Kris enjoyed the fact that at least in body, she could feel free. She ran her hands down her hips as she pulled down her underwear and stepped out of them, laughing at the trail of clothes that stretched across the floor of the room.

As she pulled back the covers of her bed, she looked over at the package of diapers, still sitting in the middle of the room. “Guess I should do something about that, huh?” She said to herself. As she picked up the package, she felt suddenly relaxed, and felt herself letting go a little bit of the worry that was weighing on her. As she stuffed the package underneath her bed, she drew one out slowly, feeling the cool plastic of the outside. She looked at her door briefly, and thought of Jay and Mary sitting there, and wondered if she would get caught. She wet the top of her lip for a second in thought, and decided that she deserved any comfort she could get after what had happened.

She walked to the top of her bed, diaper in hand. She piled up her pillows against the wall, and opened the diaper as she placed it on the bed. She ran her fingers down the middle of it, enjoying the soft feel of the middle. She laid down on top of the diaper, her legs spreading, and drew the front up to tape it. She laughed when she remembered her earlier mistake, along with Ellen’s warning about diaper rashes. After letting the front of the diaper fall back to the bed, she reached over to where the bottle of baby oil was sitting from earlier. She clicked open the cap, and slowly dribbled the baby oil down her tummy. She jumped as the cold touched her skin, but relaxed as she began rubbing it in, all over her diaper area. She poured a little more into her hand to warm it up first, and then gently began rubbing her private areas, wanting to make sure they were taken care of.

Kris felt herself drift off a little bit as she rubbed, and found herself thinking about the kiss between her Court. Court’s soft lips touching hers, Kris’s hand touching the side of her face as they drew together. Kris felt desire start to overtake her, and all the worries about what would happen felt washed away under the current of these feelings. She poured a little more baby oil into her palm and continued rubbing, feeling her lips begin to part, craving attention. She felt her hips begin to move a little in rhythm to her rubbing, her head falling back among the pillows that lined her wall. She replayed everything about her meeting with Court over in her mind, from the first moment she realized who she was. Her fingers began to tease her sex, feeling the ecstasy as she lightly touched her clit. She felt her body jump every time she touched it, amazed at how sensual she felt, how raw the feelings were. She slowly ran her hand down her body, and felt her body arc as she slid a finger inside.

She could feel the wetness on her finger, and wondered if that was from the baby oil, or from thinking about Court’s kiss. She drew her finger out and began rubbing her clit a little more, feeling her body rest under her touch. She ran her other hand over her stomach and chest, enjoying the feel of her smooth skin, and gave a small gasp as she moved gently over her nipples. She moved her hand down her body, tracing the curve of her hip, and found herself pulling the diaper up between her legs. She felt the middle of the diaper begin to cover her, and jumped as new feelings came over her. She used her hand to push the diaper against herself, enjoying the feeling for some reason she couldn’t describe. She removed her other hand from her clit, and pulled the diaper up tight, feeling it rub against her. Kris closed her eyes and enjoyed the sensations, as she pressed against the outside of the diaper.

She suddenly broke out in a smile, thinking about what a sight this must be. A grown woman enjoying her body with a diaper! She giggled at the thought for a moment, before another touch of the diaper to her clit brought her back to what she was doing. She felt herself going back to when she first saw Court’s website, and all she had read there. Kris dreamt about her kiss again, and felt waves of desire come over her. She closed her eyes tightly in anticipation, as she felt her body begin to convulse, the feeling of a climax building. She reached back down into her diaper and began playing with her clit, the diaper still pressing against the rest of her. As she shook back and forth, she felt her climax roll over her whole body, the warmth touching everywhere. She took a few deep breaths, savoring everything about the moment, and how good it had felt.

Kris slowly opened her eyes and felt the weariness coming back now that she was finished. She slowly drew the diaper all the way up, and taped it on to her. She felt the crinkle as she moved to pull the covers back, and just collapsed at the sense of peace that was over her. She pulled a pillow over to her, and quickly fell into a dreamful sleep.

Chapter 10 - Discussions

Kris opened her eyes a few hours later, feeling the bulk of the diaper between her legs as she stretched them. She let out a soft yawn, as she slid out of bed to check the time. Her tummy began to grumble, and Kris was surprised to see that she had slept a number of hours. She could tell by the scent coming through her door that Mary was cooking dinner tonight, probably for her and Jay before he said good bye. Kris let out a sigh of relief, glad that the kitchen wouldn’t be destroyed for a second time this weekend by Jay’s visit.

She walked to the bathroom and splashed a little water on her face, trying to shake the last of the sleepiness out of her. She couldn’t believe how well she had slept these past few days. She eyed the diaper between her legs with a curious look as she squeezed a little facial moisturizer onto her hand. After applying the lotion, she walked over towards the toilet and began untaping the diaper. She let it fall to floor, enjoying the feeling as the coolness of the bathroom touched her skin. She bent to pick up the diaper to throw it away, and was a little surprised to see that it was a little moist. “Must be from my earlier activities,” she thought to herself as she tossed the diaper in the wastebasket.

After walking back to the room, she quickly picked out a pair of jeans and a light sweater from her college, and put on a pair of trouser socks. She intended to spend the night out, hoping to give Mary and Jay as much time alone as she could. She put her hair back in a quick pony tail, and opened the door.

She was greeted not with the sight of Mary and Jay sitting down to dinner, but of Mary lounging at the table with a book, a few candles lit, and a glass of blush wine in her hand. Mary smiled up at Kris as she walked into the room.

“Well, look who is awake finally. I made dinner for us tonight.”

“Where’s Jay?” Kris asked with a confused look.

“He took off early today to try and beat some of the traffic. But I think he’ll be back next weekend, but we’ll see. Would you like a glass of wine?” Mary asked

“Would love one, I could use it!” Kris answered with a smile. “So why the dinner tonight?”

“We’ll talk about that in a little bit,” Mary said as she reached over and filled the second wine glass.

Kris sat down opposite Mary, still confused as to what was going on. She swirled the wine in the glass for a moment, and took a small sip, enjoying the flavors that flowed from the wine. They had a few idle conversations as Mary got up and went to the kitchen to finish dinner, talking about the visit with Jay. Mary quickly finished dinner, just having to warm up a few things. She made a chicken alfredo dish, one of Kris’s favorites from college.

“Thank you so much for dinner,” Kris said with an excited look. “I’ll return the favor later in the week.”

“Kris, I’m not sure how to say this, but we have to talk.” Mary said, a serious look on her face.

Kris took a moment to think, as she took a long gulp of her glass of wine. “About what?” she asked as she tried to appear unsure of what was going on.

“You know what. About this afternoon. I’ve never seen you turn down a chance to talk about something. I just want to know what’s going on. I think I have a good idea, but would like to hear about it from you.” Mary answered.

“She knows,” Kris thought silently. “How did you know?” she asked.

“This afternoon, when you went to the coffee house,” Mary began. She trailed off when she saw tears starting to form in her roommate’s eyes.

Kris bent her head down, the emotions of the past few days beginning to take their toll on her. She must have known about the coffee house being a gay hangout. “I’m sorry I couldn’t talk to you Mary, I was just. I don’t know. Confused? Lost? Shocked? I don’t know. I don’t even know how I feel about it all yet!” she stammered out. The tears were falling down her cheeks as she lifted the glass to her lips. She didn’t take a sip though. Kris just stared into it, wondering what her fairly religious roommate would think.

“It’s okay honey, I understand.” Mary answered as she reached across the table to pat Kris’s hand.

“I didn’t know about the coffee house at all! I thought I was meeting a guy there, and never expected Court to be a woman!” Kris confessed through the tears.

Mary sat back for a moment, her eyebrows drawing together. “I can understand why you didn’t want to talk about that this afternoon,” she said as she settled into the chair and shook her head slightly. “So what happened?”

“We met at the coffee house like we had planned. We spoke for a few minutes about ourselves and she was just so nice, and we felt such a strong pull to one another. Mary, I know you’ll probably hate me for this, but, I… I kissed her.” Kris felt her eyes go wide, amazed that she was able to say it. “I think I liked it. I don’t know. I feel so ashamed about it all, and don’t know why it happened. It’s just all wrong!”

Mary came around the table and handed Kris a napkin to dry her eyes with. She put her arms around her from behind in a hug, trying to calm her roommate down. “Why is it so wrong?”

Kris looked up at Mary’s face. “Oh, I don’t know, because she’s the same sex as me? Because it’s a sin? Because my parents are going to kill me if they ever found out? That I closed myself off to you this afternoon over it? Do you need any more reasons?” Kris asked mockingly.

“Well, the jury is still out on whether it is a sin or not. I never really cared for that line of thought in the church. Love is love. As for being the same sex, well, are you attracted to her?” Mary asked as she sat back in her chair and refilled the wine glasses.

“I honestly don’t know,” Kris said.

“I bet you do. Think back to that kiss. How did it make you feel?”

Kris couldn’t admit to Mary that she’d been thinking about the kiss since it happened. She just continued to stare down at her glass, every now and then taking a small sip.

“That’s what I thought,” Mary said with a grin. “I think I can tell how you feel from the way your lips are curving upwards. Kris, I have to say this to you. I think this may be a wonderful thing for you.”

“What?” Kris asked, her eyes flying open as she looked at Mary open jawed. “How can you say that?”

“For one, you’re my friend and I care about you more then I can say. I love you and worry about you. I’ve never seen you happy in a relationship before,” Mary said matter of factly.

“What are you talking about, I dated in college,” Kris said intensely.

“Oh yeah. You dated Chris for a what, a year when you came to school? That you debated breaking up with him for more then half the relationship says a lot. Then Bill was next in your senior year, who I won’t even bother talking to you about. Do you remember how you felt when you dated him?” Mary asked skeptically.

“I wasn’t miserable or anything like that.”

“True, but there is a difference between being miserable and not being happy. I think I saw more happiness in that small smile before then I did the whole time I watched you with Bill.” Mary stated.

“Do you always watch me?” Kris inquired.

“For the most part, yes. And I know you watch me back. You were the first to tell me to leave Dave when we were in school.”

“Yeah, but that was obvious. He was hurting you. I could see you worrying all the time when you were with him,” Kris said.

“So is it a surprise I can see some of those things in you?” Mary asked.

“I guess not.”

“Kris, all I’m going to say is that don’t worry so much about what others are going to think. We don’t have a long time to live, and if this felt right to you, then what’s the harm? Your parents aren’t near here, and will never hear it from me if you don’t want them to know. You deserve to be happy, you’re such a good person. Besides Jay may love the idea that I have a lesbian roommate!” Mary said with a laugh.

Kris just rolled her eyes and took a deep breath. “Mary, I did like it. I keep thinking about her lips on mine, even though it was a small kiss and nothing more. And her skin,” Kris said as she blushed, not believing that she was saying these things to Mary.

“I’m happy for you,” Mary said, starting to feel tears well up at the sight of her roommate. “Why don’t you go write her? I’d love to meet her sometime. Male or female, she still needs my approval before you’re allowed to officially see her!”

Kris broke out laughing. “Of course Mom! Teach Jay how to cook without destroying kitchens, and I’ll give you my marriage approval for him,” Kris said with a wink.

“I don’t see that happening any time soon!” Mary said with a laugh.

Kris’s eyes lit up. “You don’t mind if I skip dinner?”

“Course not, I know how you feel,” Mary said with a grin. “Go write her.”

“Thank you!” Kris said as she picked up her glass and carried it to her room.

Mary sat back in the chair, the glass of wine resting in her left hand as it lay on the arm of the chair. She watched as her roommate’s door closed and slyly smiled. “I’m glad for you Kris,” she said softly. “But we still have to talk about what Jay found when he went to empty your garbage for you today.”

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 11 - Play Date

Kris jumped onto her bed, laying across it on her tummy. She clicked open her laptop, and pressed the power button. She couldn’t believe how light-hearted she felt. Knowing there was someone to at least share these feelings with brought a much needed sense of relief to her. She felt giddy as she watched her wireless connection come online, and her IM list fill up. She was disappointed to see that Court wasn’t online, and from her away message, it looked like she was working.

Kris clicked her name and typed out a quick message to her:

“Hey Court, just letting you know that I had a good time with you today, and hope we can see each other again. I probably shouldn’t say this, but I keep thinking about that kiss… If you want, call me sometime. My number is ###-###-####. Hope to hear from you.”

She stared at her number in the window for a few seconds before clicking send. Giving out her phone number over the internet was something she didn’t care to do very much. She turned on her away message and eyed the bathroom longingly. She felt pretty beat up from the events of the weekend, and a little grimy besides.

She went over to her cd player and picked Enya to listen too. She walked into the bathroom, leaving the door open so the soft tones would reach her. She turned the small handles on her bathtub to start the water pouring, reaching over for her small bag of bath salts. She sprinkled some over the tub, relishing the scents that emerged. She lit the various candles scattered throughout the room, a mix of cherry and vanilla scents filling the room. She stripped off her clothes as she watched the tub fill, checking the temperature every now and then. She clicked the lights off as she wandered back into her room for a moment to pick up her book that was laying on her nightstand. She drifted back to the tub and turned off the water, and after placing the book on the edge, slowly immersed herself in the warm water.

Kris loved the feel of the warm water surrounding her body. She dipped her head back, enjoying the feeling of her loose hair flowing about her head. She pulled herself up reluctantly, brushing the hair back away from her face as she leaned against the back of the bathtub. She began washing herself, enjoying the feel of her skin, wondering if Court’s skin felt as smooth. She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to figure out how someone she had met so briefly, had made such an impression on her. Even more surprisingly though, was how her eyes kept drifting down to her stomach, her thoughts continually thinking about how nice it had felt when a diaper was one her. After a deep, questioning breath, she used a small hand towel to dry her fingers, and happily lost herself and her thoughts as she began reading her book.

She felt the water begin to cool after a while, and decided that her blissful bath had to come to an end. She released the water and dreamily picked up a towel, and felt goose bumps pickle her skin as she met the cold air. She quickly dried herself off, and ran into her bedroom, happy to leave the cold tile floor behind. She picked out a pair of underwear and a set of white pajamas with a floral design. They were a cotton pair, ones that felt as soft as newborn’s blanket. After a short trip to the bathroom to dry her hair and put on a little moisturizer, Kris happily crawled into bed and clicked on her TV and laptop.

Kris did a quick check on IM, and was disappointed to see that Court still hadn’t returned. After the talk with Mary, she had this deep desire to tell her about everything that was talked about. She opened her browser and drifted through her regular sites, complete with a quick visit to Court’s site, still shaking her head that she had never read the ‘About Court’ page. She read through the entire website this time, not intending to get caught with her pants down again. Or should it be diaper down? Kris shook her head at thought, giggling softly at her joke. She settled back into her bed after a little bit with the laptop resting on the other side of the bed, and put on ‘Coyote Ugly’, one of her favorite movies.

About an hour later Kris heard the portable phone in the common room ring. She heard Mary pick up after the second ring, her voicing sounding hopeful. Kris reasoned that that it was probably Jay calling to say that he was home safe. She brought her attention back to the movie, and jumped a few seconds later when she heard a soft knock on her door.

“Kris, awake still?” She heard Mary call.

Kris’s heart quickened a little. It took a few seconds for her to answer, still wondering if she should just pretend to be asleep. “Yup.”

“You have a phone call.”

Kris practically jumped out of bed and dashed over to the door and swung it open as if Mary had announced the apartment was on fire. A wide-eyed Mary greeted her on the other side, the portable phone cupped in her hand.

“Quite a way to open a door,” Mary said with a smile. “Say hi for me,” she said with a grin that spoke of a lot of questions later.

“Thanks. Do you need the phone tonight?” Kris asked.

“Nope, already spoke to Jay online and he’s home safe, so it should be okay.”

“Thanks again,” Kris said as she lifted the phone to her ear. She saw Mary mouth the word ‘Enjoy’ as she slowly closed the door, trying to keep herself calm.

Kris felt her skin get a little clammy as thoughts about what she was going to say were racing through her head. “Umm, hello?”

“Hey there. Kris?”

“It’s me,” She said, trying to relax. “Is this Court?”

“Yup!” she heard Court answer quickly

“Thanks for calling,” Kris said with a smile. “How’d the rest of your day go?”

“Oh, pretty good for a Sunday. I’m not looking forward to tomorrow morning though.” Court answered, sounding a little tired.

“Me neither. Stupid Monday mornings!” Kris laughed.

“My sentiments exactly! What do you do?” Court asked.

“I work at a preschool. I love the kids, even when they drive me nuts!” Kris answered. She loved talking about what she did, and even missed being there on the weekends sometimes.

“Wow, I’m in awe!” Court explained. “I don’t think I could handle that.”

“It takes patience, that’s an understatement. So what do you do?” Kris answered.

“I work in the human resources department for a pretty big company. I love it for the most part. Getting to help people is such a great feeling. It’s the firing and counseling that get to me at times.” Court said. “On the weekends though, I work a part time job at a pizza parlor to put a little extra money away.”

“That’s good. I should do something like that.” Kris said.

“It’s a good idea, you never know what can happen sometimes. So, not to completely change the subject, but, how are you feeling?” Court said, her voice filled with concern.

“I’m doing pretty well actually. Believe it or not, my roommate and I talked about it, and helped put things in a better perspective.” Kris answered truthfully. “That, and I took a long bath, which I’m sure you know can always cure a lot of problems!”

Court broke out laughing. “True enough,” she said, still laughing. “Well, if you want, would you like to get together and hang out?”

Kris’s heart stopped for a second. She felt her excitement grow as the words sunk in. “I’d love to!” She hadn’t even expected a phone call from Court after the incident this afternoon, much less a chance to see her again.

“Okay, how does my place next weekend sound?”

“That sounds great!” Kris said, trying to keep the excitement from being too obvious.

“Great! I’ll send you directions over email and we’ll set up a time. It sounds like you’re as excited as I am!” said Court.

Kris guessed that she didn’t do such a good job of hiding her excitement. She felt like she was fidgeting like a twelve year old school girl getting asked out the first time. “That sounds great, and can’t wait to see you again.”

“I just wanted to let you know that I had fun this afternoon, despite the shock!” Court said seriously. “You giving me your phone number meant a lot.”

“Well, I felt it was only fair since I had yours. I had a good time too. At least, I think I did. Guess I’m still wondering.” Kris said, trying to be truthful.

“That’s understandable, and we’ll talk about it this weekend if you want.” Court answered.

“I’d like that. Okay, so I guess we’ll talk online during the week.” Kris said. “Have a good week.”

“You too,” Court answered. “See you on Saturday for our play date!”

Kris heard the phone click off as the words registered. Play date? She wondered for a second about what Court had meant. “Huh, oh well, probably nothing,” Kris thought as she put it out of her mind. She thought of going to talk to Mary about the phone call, but decided that she had had enough talks for the day.

She jumped back onto her bed, the high she had gotten from talking to Court starting to wear off. She laid back on her pillows, staring up at her ceiling as she went over everything that had happened that weekend. She had bought diapers, that were still resting under her bed. Met someone over the internet, a female someone, and was amazed to find out that she had feelings for her, deeper then she had felt in a long time. And she talked about possibly being gay to her roommate, a conversation that she still couldn’t believe happened. She felt her head starting to spin under the pull of the events, and soon felt her eyelids begin to drop.

The twisted feelings didn’t do much to keep dreams of Court from her that night.

Chapter 12 - Pride

Kris’s week started out like any other. Work started early at the preschool, with parents starting to drop off their children at seven. Kris generally got there between six and six thirty so she’d have enough time to get settled in, and to clean up anything that needed it. As she hung up her coat in the storeroom, she saw her coworkers starting to file in, looking as worn out as she did.

She worked with two other people, Helen and Sam. Helen was pretty friendly to Kris, and helped get her through the beginning when she thought the kids were going to drive her slowly insane. She had an easy way about her, and the kids responded so well to her enthusiasm. She had a little girl of her own who attended the preschool, Jessica. Kris was sure that her 'mom attitude" helped her deal with the rougher days there. Sam was a little different. He was more an authorities figure, always telling the kids what to do and getting upset if they didn’t listen to him. He seemed to like control a little too much for Kris’s tastes, who just enjoyed having fun with the kids and playing with them. He was always pleasant to Kris though, and had even asked her out a few times, which Kris did her best to turn down gently so not to cause problems with a coworker.

“Good morning,” Kris mumbled, still waiting for her first cup of coffee of the morning.

“Morning Kris,” Helen answered. “Have a good weekend?”

“You could say that,” Kris said as she blushed slightly.

“Oh, that kind of good,” Helen said with a wink. She eyed Sam in the doorway and dropped her voice. “We’ll talk later?”

“Um, sure,” Kris said, managing a weak smile. She saw Sam eyeing the two of them in the background, a slight frown on his face. “How are you today Sam?”

“I’m doing alright. Spent the weekend at home alone, as usual.” He stated as he dropped his coat on a table. “We could still go out one night if you want.”

“Well, we’ll see Sam. I’m pretty busy lately.” Kris said, trying to keep her voice neutral. She was pretty new to the preschool, and didn’t want to cause any problems. “Is Mrs. Bently going to be in today.”

“No, she left a message saying she was going to take the day off. It must be nice to be the owner.” Sam answered.

“I guess, but she has a lot to do outside of here also,” Kris said. “Oh well, time to face the monsters, huh?”

Helen laughed as she shook her head, “Come on, you know you love them. Even when they’re covered in food bits, surrounded by thrown toys and having a temper tantrum. When they look up at you with those eyes.”

“You’re right, it’s like some kind of evil power!” Kris laughed as she wandered out of the stockroom.

The boys and girls started arriving shortly after that, happy to see all their friends after the weekend. She saw one, Brian, going on and on about his weekend, and how his parents took him to the circus. Michelle was happily listening, and Kris wondered if there was a childhood crush developing. Melissa never wasted any time at school, and was already scattering blocks over the playroom, a mischievous smile spread across her lips. Kris just sighed and shook her head, knowing that inevitably, she’d be the one scooping up all those blocks later in the day.

The day was pretty normal, play time early until eleven oclock, and then lunch time. They served cheese sandwiches today, all cut nicely in fours for the kids. Kris rarely if ever had the time to eat while working, but managed to gulp down half a sandwich and a couple of sips of Sprite. The kids were happily eating away and talking… and occasionally throwing something that earned a boy some corner time. After lunch, the kids were put down to nap, each of them on their own blankets that they brought from home on their first day. Kris happily slumped down in a chair next to Helen, happy to see that the kids were being good about nap time today. Sam rested at the far end of the room, watching over the kids there. He looked mildly disappointed that Kris sat next to Helen instead of him.

“So,” Helen opened.

“So,” Kris answered.

“Tell me about your weekend,” Helen answered with a smile.

“Oh, it was pretty average,” Kris answered, trying to hide the gross understatement. “I did meet someone though.” She knew she had to admit that, Helen always had a way of reading her, and the blush this morning meant that she knew something good had happened.

“That’s nice to hear, though I’m not sure I’d let Sam know. He’s been more then annoying lately, and this may push him over. So tell me about him!” Helen said in a low whisper.

“Well, the name is Court. Pretty tall, five foot seven. Really nice and sweet from everything I’ve seen so far.” Kris answered, keeping her answer pretty vague.

“How did you two meet?”

“Oh, over the internet. We just started chatting and seems we connected pretty well.” Kris answered.

Helen nodded, “I always worry about people who meet people over the internet. Who knows who you might run into.”

“Ain’t that the truth!” Kris laughed, forgetting herself for a second.

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, nothing. I’ll tell you later, it looks like some of the kids are getting restless.”

She watched Helen’s back as she headed to where some of the children were laying down. She watched as Helen quietly ‘hushed’ two of the boys who were trying to be sneaky and play when they should be resting. Kris closed her eyes for a moment, upset that she glossed over the truth with a friend of hers. It seemed like she was doing that a lot lately for some reason. She knew that this wouldn’t keep up though, and didn’t want to start outright lying to her friend. Helen would want to meet Court at some point, she knew that as well. She sighed, the tinges of a headache starting to form.

Helen came back a few moments later, patting Kris’s leg. “Are you okay?”

“Oh, just a small headache I feel coming on. I’ll take something when it’s snack time.” She answered.

“Okay, sounds like a good idea,” Helen answered. “You know you can always talk to me, right?”

“I know, but there’s just too much right now and I have to figure some things out,” Kris answered, as she looked at Helen, pleading for understanding.

“I can relate to that,” Helen answered. “Just know your friends are here for you.”

“Thanks Helen, I appreciate that,” Kris said. She leaned her head back again, happy to close her eyes for a few minutes.

Kris opened her eyes to see the kids sitting in a circle playing with various toys. She felt a little tug on the bottom of her shirt, and looked down to see Jessica standing there looking up.

“Wake up Kris, naptime is over!” Jessica said with a giggle.

Kris scooped her up into her arms and tickled her for a few seconds, laughing as the little girl shrieked for Kris to stop. She put her down on the floor with a laugh. “Thanks Jessica, you’re the cutest alarm clock I’ve ever seen.”

“No problem.” She called as she skipped over to continue playing.

Kris wandered over to where Helen was organizing a game of ‘duck-duck-goose’, and laughed as the kids nervously waited to be pat on the head. “Why didn’t you wake me up?” she said quietly to Helen.

“You looked like you needed a longer nap then the kids today,” Helen said as she smiled.

“Gee, thanks.” Kris answered, as she walked off to the kitchen to start getting the snacks ready.

The kitchen was pretty simple, and only a kitchen in name. It contained a refrigerator and microwave, but that was about it. The counter was on the far wall, running from the corner and ending at the refrigerator that was snuggled in the back corner on the left. Cabinets lined the upper walls, full of plastic cups and dishes for the kids. Kris thought for a moment, trying to remember what the kids had for snacks last week. After a bit, she settled on juice boxes and ritz crackers. It was one of Jessica’s favorite snacks, which broke the tie with cookies and milk.

After setting the juice boxes on the counter, she reached up to top shelf of the cabinet, where the crackers were usually kept. She reached up on her toes, and as she grabbed the box, felt something rub her shoulders. She enjoyed the sensation for a second, and then quickly dropped down to her feet spinning around to see Sam standing there. Her eyes went wide for a second, at the sight of him. She had thought it was Helen behind her.

“I’m sorry Kris, you just looked tired today and thought you would like that,” Sam opened.

Kris eyed him for a second, and instinctively folded her arms over her stomach. “Uh, thanks for the thought Sam,” she said carefully. “It felt nice, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do it again. I don’t want to have a problem with Mrs. Bently.”

“Oh, okay. I’m sorry,” he said, sounding genuine. “Maybe another time.”

“Okay, thanks,” Kris said as she took the package of juice boxes in her arm and the box of crackers in her hand. She walked past him, and felt him follow closely behind, his breath touching the back of the neck. Kris shook her head, thinking that she was making too much of it. He was a coworker after all, and Helen did things like that all the time. She walked quickly to the other room, and began putting the snacks together for the kids.

The rest of the day went by pretty normally, the last child being picked up at four thirty. Kris ran through her regular end-of-the-day routine, wanting to get home and relax. After finishing the clean up, she quickly ran to grab her coat, saying a fast good-bye to Helen and Sam. Sam opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but Kris wasn’t in the mood and didn’t give him much of a chance to.

Kris started driving home at a faster then normal pace, just wanting to feel the door to her apartment close behind her. After one close-call at an intersection, Kris decided that she needed something to calm her down, or at least someone to talk to. She didn’t want to talk about anything to do with Court, so knew Mary was out, and Helen knew Sam. She took a deep breath, not knowing what to do. She missed all of her college friends, and missed living with a bunch of other people, people you could to if you had a problem.

After a little bit, Kris finally made it home, and was happy to see that Mary wasn’t home yet. She intended to be bundled up in her room by the time she came home from work, which gave Kris an hour to get ready. She dropped her purse and reached in, looking for her wallet so she could check her accounts. As she drew it out, she saw a receipt fall to the floor. She picked it up, wondering what it was. Across the back of it, she saw Ellen’s name written, and her phone number. “Ellen,” Kris said to herself. She thought silently to herself. Ellen would be great, Kris thought. They didn’t know each other well, Ellen was easy to talk to, and even had that motherly look that let her solve problems just by being there.

Kris walked to her room and picked up the portable phone, and after a few more seconds of thought, punched in Ellen’s number.

“Hello,” Kris heard a woman answer.

“Hello, Ellen?” Kris asked.

“Yes, this is. Who is this?” Ellen answered.

“This is Kris, I met you at CVS the other day,” Kris said as her voice trailed off.

“Oh, hi Kris!” Ellen said, her voice becoming excited. “How did everything go? I hope it was a good solution.”

“Oh, definitely,” Kris said, her face heating a little. “So, just calling to see if you wanted to go out to dinner sometime and talk. Interested?”

“I’d like that a lot,” Ellen answered. Kris let out a deep breath, wondering what Ellen would think of a relative stranger inviting her to dinner.

“Great! When is good for you?” Kris asked.

“How about Wednesday?” Ellen offered.

“Okay! Where would you like to eat?”

“Well, how about at Friday’s? It’s a pretty good place, and have a good variety.” Ellen said.

“That’s sounds great. Six okay with you?” Kris asked.

“Okay, I’ll meet you then. I’m glad you called!”

“Me too, and can’t wait to see you.” Kris answered.

“Me either. Oh, I have to go sweetie, dinner is almost ready. So I’ll see you Wednesday?”

“Okay! Have a good night.” Kris said.

“You too. Take care,” Ellen said as Kris heard the phone click.

Kris couldn’t help but smile, glad that she might have a new friend to hang out with down here. Kris quickly made herself a simple dinner, a grilled cheese and potato chips. She couldn’t help but laugh, and thought that she had to stop working at the preschool before she started considering this a gourmet meal. She gulped down the food, and was safely in her room about ten minutes before Mary usually got home.

She rested on her bed for a few minutes and scanned the internet, and found her thoughts drifting to the package of diapers stuffed under her bed. She thought about Ellen, and how okay she seemed with being in diapers, even in public. And here Kris was, worried about them behind a closed door! Kris decided that she was being silly about all this, and that she didn’t have anything to really be ashamed of. After all, who was she hurting? She laughed again to herself, really thinking that she had to stop working at the preschool soon - diapers were becoming normal to her!

She reached under her bed and drew forth the package, feeling excited for a moment. She smiled to herself, already looking forward to the feelings of contentment and safety that a diaper around her seemed to bring. Kris thought back to Sam’s actions and shuddered a little bit, clutching the chosen diaper even closer to her. She pushed the rest back under her bed, and found herself spread across her bed again, laying as naked as a newborn, waiting for the diaper. As Kris started to unfold it, she heard the door to the apartment open and close, and stopped for a second, feeling her heart skip for a moment. She sighed in relief when she heard Mary close her own door on the other side of the apartment. She quickly unfolded the diaper, trying to keep the crinkling from being too loud. After laying on the middle, she opened her nightstand and coated her diaper area in powder. She shocked herself when she poured a little extra onto her chest, and enjoyed the feeling as she rubbed it all over, the scent helping to smooth her frayed nerves. A content smile came to her face as she taped the diaper, feeling it covering all of her. She couldn’t understand why, but she just felt like the diaper protected her.

Kris rolled around on her tummy, enjoying the feeling as she turned on the laptop and started looking at more adult diaper sites. She started humming a soft lullaby to herself, one she knew from when she was little. She typed away to some of her online friends, and thought about her upcoming dinner with Ellen. As she thought about how Ellen handled herself, she felt completely comfortable about wearing a diaper for the first time.

She shook her head for a second. Not a diaper. Her diaper. She smiled at the thought, and squeezed her legs together, glad to feel the soft padding answering her.

Chapter 13 - Dinner Date

Kris watched as Tuesday vanished in the blink of an eye, her thoughts trailing to the upcoming dinner with Ellen and her weekend meeting with Court. She couldn’t help but grin as dreams of how things would go kept filling her thoughts. Helen smiled at her the whole day, but left her to her thoughts until Kris was ready to share them, which she silently thanked her for. Sam was his usual cheerful self, but fortunately, kept his distance. Knowing Kris was preoccupied and not in the mood for conversation was a good way to keep him at bay, she decided.

As Wednesday came to a close, Kris stood in the bathroom and primped herself, trying to look semi-presentable for the dinner after the ‘little monsters’ had taken their toll. Helen spotted her in passing while she picked up some of the games off the floor, and gave a sly grin.

“Seeing Court tonight?” Helen asked.

“No, tonight is dinner with a friend I met while shopping the other day.” Kris answered, truthfully for once.

“Sounds like fun, have a good time.” Helen said.

“I will, I could use the night off!” Kris answered with a laugh.

As Kris started out the door, she heard Sam’s voice call from the storeroom.

“So dinner tonight, huh? With a male or female?” Sam asked.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but female.” Kris answered.

“Oh, have fun. Would you do dinner with me some night?” Sam asked, sounding hopeful.

“Maybe,” Kris said, still trying to be neutral. “Tonight is just a girl’s night out, I needed someone to talk to.”

“You can talk to me, you know,” Same said, sound indignantly.

Kris shook her head and closed her eyes. “It’s a girl-thing Sam, you wouldn’t understand.”

“Geeze, what are you, some kind of lezzy or something?” Sam asked.

The statement caught Kris by shock for a second as her eyes widened for a second. She thought she saw Sam look confused for a second, but then settled into his regular demeanor. “No, just me wanting a friend to talk to, is that okay with you?” Kris ask, her voice heating. She pushed the door open and left, not wanting to hear anything further that Sam had to say.

Kris sat in her car, and felt her whole body shake for a second. She covered her face in her hands, wondering what she should do. She felt a few tears form, but quickly scrubbed her eyes clear of them, not wanting to look like a complete wreck for Ellen. After a few minutes, she finally started her car and drove over the Friday’s. She arrived a little early and sat in the waiting room, waiting for Ellen. She checked over the menu and looked at the various decorations, always amazed at the combination of random things that were stocked over the walls. A young hostess sat behind a podium, taking various people to their tables now and then.

She heard the door open behind her, and turned to see Ellen standing there. She looked up into her eyes, the same easy confidence there as the other day. She wore a simple outfit, jeans over a dark green sweater top. She wore different glasses today, with a more rounded frame that gave her face a little more depth. Kris was glad that she had decided to wear heels to dinner, bringing her height more on par with Helen. The two looked at each other for a second, and then quickly embraced each other in a hug like old friends who hadn’t seen each other in ages.

“I’m so glad you called,” Helen said with a gleam in her eye. “I didn’t think you would.”

“Me either,” Kris quipped. “I just decided what the hell, and your advice has paid off so far!”

“The powder and baby oil?” she whispered.

“Yup!” Kris answered. “I forgot it the first night, but quickly figured out what it was for!”

“We all seem to have to learn that lesson!” Ellen laughed. “Would you like to sit?”

“That’d be great.”

They spoke to the hostess and she began leading the way. She noticed a very faint swish coming from Ellen, but Kris knew that no one else would ever notice. Kris just knew she had to be wearing a diaper, mainly because Ellen had said she needed them all the time, and by the slight puffing out of her butt in the tight jeans. She heard Ellen whisper to the hostess for a fairly private booth, if at all possible, which Kris was thankful for. They were led to the back corner, and Kris could only see one other couple a few tables away.

“So how are things going?” Ellen asked. “I hope the diapers are working well and keeping the bed dry, especially since I recommended the brand!”

“Oh, their great, and my bed is usually dry,” Kris answered, blushing at the half truth.

“That’s really good to hear,” Ellen answered.

“I actually had an odd moment last night. I caught myself for the first time thinking of it as my diaper, instead of a diaper. I guess last night was the first night I was really comfortable with them.” Kris said.

Kris watched as Ellen nodded. “That’s good, sometimes that takes a while. I just consider them regular parts of my clothes now.”

Kris slowly gulped, wondering if she should ask this next question. “Ellen, how do you feel when you wear your diapers?”

“Oh, I don’t mind them, now at least. In the beginning, I dreaded putting one on, but after a time, I just knew they were needed, so it became no big deal. My husband, at the time, didn’t really care for it though, and he became a little cold towards me, especially at night.” Ellen stated, as she looked off in the distance.

“How are things with him now?” Kris asked.

“Oh, just great. We were divorced a little bit ago.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Kris said as she reached over and squeezed Ellen’s hand for a second.

“Thanks. I’m pretty okay with it. We just wanted different things. I wanted a bigger family and grow old together. He wanted to sleep around,” Ellen said with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “But if you’re worried, diapers had little do to with the breakup.”

“Oh, I figured that. Someone that would leave you over something so trivial obviously didn’t really love you. Where is he now?”

“In California, with my daughter,” Ellen said, sounding cold. “He took her when he upped and left suddenly, and now I’m waiting on the courts. I’m glad we met Kris, it’s nice to have someone that I can share all this with.”

“Me too,” Kris said with a sigh. She watched Ellen’s eyes look at her quizzically. “I have something to tell you Ellen, and I want to do it early. And I’m sorry for it.”

Ellen’s sat back, her voice dropping a little. “Well, might as well get it over with then rather the leave me wondering.” She perked back up, and reached across the table, the picture of a woman ready for anything, and ready to deal with whatever was said.

“When I first met you, I lied to you, and I’m sorry for it,” Kris opened, hoping Ellen would understand. “I was embarrassed, and just didn’t know what to do. I don’t really have a problem with wetting the bed.”

Ellen’s face paled for a second. She turned her head for a second and stared off, and finally closed her eyes and rested her head in her hand and rubbed her temple.

“I’m so sorry Ellen, I didn’t mean to mislead you. I just, didn’t know what to do that day.” Kris said, trying to fight back the tears.

Ellen took a deep breath. “It’s okay love, I understand. I was probably as much wreck as you were my first time.” For the first time, she looked over at Kris, a few tears in her eyes as well.

“I still hope we can be friends, I really do. And we can still talk about everything.” Kris said, reaching over to take Ellen’s hand. “I think you’re a pretty amazing woman, to say the very least.”

“Thank you,” Ellen answered. “It’s nothing though. Don’t think I’m going to give up someone to discuss all this with just because it’s a want versus a need. I guess this makes you either a DL or an AB.”

“I think I’m an AB, but I’m not really sure. I felt at peace in the baby supply aisle the other day in CVS, but I’m not positive at all. How do you know what those are?” Kris asked.

“When I started wearing, I did some research, and the AB and DL sites had the best information. Which I guess isn’t too surprising!” Ellen said, laughing.

Kris laughed, “You’re right. I haven’t done much research yet, but I’m working on it!”

“I’m sure you are. Well, I have to admit, this was pretty shocking. I’ve never met an AB before. Okay, I think I can accept this,” Ellen answered, as if coming to a conclusion in her mind. “I appreciate you telling me. You could have kept this secret all you wanted, you know?”

“Oh, I know, but I didn’t think that was fair to you. You looked so happy in the store to have someone to share all this with. I was worried about telling you because I didn’t want you to lose that. But we can still have that, if you want.” Kris answered.

“That sounds like a plan,” Ellen answered, “and we’ll see how our relationship develops.”

“I like that plan,” Kris beamed.

They enjoyed a nice conversation over dinner, talking all about their lives, Kris discussing college and her career choice, and Ellen discussing her want for a family and hopes for a new relationship. By the time they finished dinner, they looked more like old friends then two people having dinner for the first time. They finished dinner off by splitting a brownie sundae, Kris happily scooping down the whip cream. At one point, she had a little on her nose, that Ellen quickly wiped away. Kris blushed at this, embarrassed that she let that happen in front of a new friend.

“It’s okay, I’ve had cream on my face from time to time too,” Ellen said. Her eyes grew to the size of saucers as she realized what she said. A deep crimson spread across her face for a second, and Ellen could swear she felt the heat down to her toes.

Kris just laughed for a second. “Okay, we’re even then, we’ve both completely embarrassed ourselves at least once tonight.”

Ellen laughed also. “Yeah, I have a way of doing that!”

“Me too, how about that?” Kris giggled.

The two women finished their dessert quickly after that. Kris thought for a moment as they finished up. Two women? Kris felt more like a girl around Ellen, who always seemed to be more in control with everything. She shook her head at the thought, and followed closely behind Ellen as she led the way out of the restaurant. As soon as they reached Kris’s car, Ellen turned to Kris and looked at her for a second.

“So have you thought about ever wearing a diaper in public?” Ellen quipped.

Kris blushed slightly at the comment, and quickly looked around to see if anyone was within ear shot. “No, I don’t think I could handle that.”

“Yeah, you could, even though the first steps are the hardest. Believe me, I know!” Ellen laughed, a little mirth in her eye. “Well, if you want, think about it. We can meet for dinner again next Wednesday. You’re more then welcome to wear one to our dinner, and I’ll make sure everything will be okay.” Ellen reached up and touched the side of Kris’s face. “I promise.”

Kris looked up for a second, into the confident face of Ellen. “Can I think about it?”

“Of course, just let me know.” Ellen answered. “Also, if you want, we can go baby supply shopping, I think you might like that. I bet that no one would notice a thing if you’re worried about being embarrassed.”

“I’d like that. I think,” Kris said while blushing. “Do you think I’m weird?”

“No, not at all. We all have things that are different, and even though I didn’t choose diapers, they chose me, I can understand what you like about them. You’re lucky that I’ve made peace with it though! If this conversation had happened when I first starting having to wear a diaper, I probably would have screamed at you for being so stupid!”

Kris laughed for a second. “Well, I’m glad I met you now then. Very glad,” Kris said as she stared up at Ellen. Her eyes held something that Kris couldn’t recognize, a look that told her that Ellen was going to take care of everything for some reason. The two friends embraced in a hug, Kris slightly feeling the outside of the diaper under Ellen’s clothes, along with an accompanying crinkle. “I loved dinner tonight Ellen.”

“I loved it too,” She answered with a smile. “I hope we do it again next week.”

“We will,” Kris answered. “The diaper may be up for debate, but dinner is a given.”

Ellen beamed for a second. “We’ll talk during the week then,” she said with a wink.

With that, Kris watched the retreating form of Ellen as she walked to her car. Kris made sure she was safely at her car, and then hopped in hers. She looked at herself in the mirror for a second, and couldn’t believe how relaxed she looked, for what felt like the first time in ages. An unspoken word hung in the air around Kris though.

“I did love dinner Ellen,” Kris said in a whisper. “But I really wanted to say that I think I love you.”

Chapter 14 - Lost

The rest of the week finished like a blur for Kris. Work seemed to fly by, even with her ignoring Sam as much as possible. Mary was out most of the week as usual, always keeping busy day and night. She always seemed to be happiest when she was out and about. When she was home though, Kris kept getting strange feelings from her. Mary looking at her funny for a second, or giggling to herself as if she could see a joke that Kris couldn’t. She didn’t pay much attention to it though, figuring that Mary was still settling in with the talk about Court the other night.

Kris found herself counting down the days until she was going to meet Court again. “Who am I kidding,” she thought. “I’m counting down the hours, minutes, and seconds too!” She laughed softly to herself, feeling a warm smile come to her. The smile was also for the memories of her nights. Kris found herself now wearing diapers to bed most of the week. She found that she felt much more rested in the morning after those nights, and just generally feeling better. She didn’t take things as seriously as she once had, and found the light-hearted feelings suited her just fine.

She found that the more she wore them, the more okay she seemed with a diaper around her. The thoughts about the first time she had wet a diaper kept pulling at her as the week went on, and Kris found herself wondering again about how a wet diaper felt. She woke up Saturday morning, feeling the diaper between her legs, and a tingling sensation. She stretched her back, reaching down and feeling the padding of the diaper, and just relaxed. The feel of the warmth spreading shocked her for a second, her eyes looking down, almost expecting to see a wet patch spreading along the bed sheet. She felt herself move past that as the warmth spread throughout her diaper area. She leaned back and smiled, feeling as if she has been doing this for years. It felt like the most natural thing in the world. Kris fell back into a quiet sleep, the warmth feeling like a blanket snuggling her.

She woke up a short time later, remembering that this was the day she and Court were planning to meet. Rising from the bed, she winced at the feel of her now cold diaper rubbing against her sensitive inner-thighs, and happily removed it in the bathroom. She covered the raw area with a little baby powder, hoping that it would help her skin feel a little better. She picked a pair of dark blue slacks and a white blouse, one of her favorite outfits for her meeting with Court. She wore her hair down today, leaving part combed back and part tumbling down the side of her face, giving her a more ‘mysterious’ look.

It was pretty early in the morning still, and Kris had a few hours till she met Court at noon. She ate a quick breakfast of bagels and orange juice with Mary, and then happily settled on the couch with a book until it was time to go. She was laying on her tummy as she read, the sun pouring in through the windows to warm her. Her mind was only half on the book though, her thoughts going in a hundred directions, with Court and diapers being the big things. As she laid there, with her legs folded over her, the image of her in a shirt and diaper doing this kept creeping in. She shook her head at the thought, and blushed slightly under Mary’s curios look. Kris quickly buried her face in the book she was reading, hoping that Mary would ignore her.

She happily left a little after that, her pulse beginning to quicken at the thought of seeing Court again. The drive over flew by, and Kris was almost surprised when she pulled into Court’s apartment complex. Kris didn’t remember a thing about the drive over, and eyed the buildings around her warily, wondering if this really was a good idea. Pulling out the piece of paper that held the directions, Kris began the slow walk over towards Court’s building. She lived up on the third floor of one of the buildings. Kris saw that there were four apartments per level, and they looked to be pretty large. The staircase up was in between the apartments, with two on each side of the staircase. Kris dragged her feet up to the third level, going slower the further she went. Voices could be heard at some of the other doors, and a gardener could be heard mowing the lawns off in the distance.

At a door marked ‘3-B’, Kris raised her hand and softly knocked, half ready to turn and bound down the stairs, not knowing what to expect. The door opened a few seconds later, a beaming Court standing there, gesturing for Kris to come in.

“Hey there, I’m so glad you found my apartment!” Court said as she embraced Kris in a hug. “Oh, sorry if that made you uncomfortable, it’s just habit!”

“That’s okay,” Kris said, hugging back. “I don’t mind at all! I can’t believe I’m here.” Kris shook her head for a second, wonder if she really should be.

“I’m sure,” Court answered, looking into Kris’s eyes. “I’m still glad you came though. At least we’ll get a bit more time to talk today, if nothing else. And with a little privacy this time!” Court blushed slightly at the comment, and Kris thought back to the two women Court was talking to in the coffee house after Kris had left.

“So we had some snoops the last time, huh?” Kris said.

“Uh huh. How’d you know?” Court asked.

“I saw you with them after I left from the window,” Kris said with a grin. “I’m sorry if I caused you any trouble.”

“Oh, not at all, just gossip, as usual,” Court said rolling her eyes. “I call it lesbian drama, though I’ve heard it called the lesbian soap-opera too! It almost seems sometimes like your circle of friends know things about your relationship quicker then you do,” Court said with a shake of her head and an exasperated look.

“Sounds like fun,” Kris answered, feeling slightly out of place.

“I’m sorry that I went off on a tangent. Come on in and make yourself at home,” Court said, leading Kris into the living room.

“You don’t want that, I’ll be flopped down on your couch napping before too long,” Kris said with a giggle.

“Okay then, don’t make yourself QUITE that comfortable,” Court said with a laugh. “Would you like anything to drink?”

“No thanks,” Kris said while taking a seat on the couch. “How was your week?” Kris saw Court drop her eyes and rub her temple with her left hand.

“It was okay, just long. I need some more time off I think,” Court answered, looking a little tired as she settled herself next to Kris.

“It looks like you work a lot. Are you sure you want to hang out today?” Kris asked.

“Not on your life! I’ve been looking forward to this since our lunch meeting last week!” Court said, looking revitalized. “So, how have you been feeling?”

“Confused, on so many levels!” Kris answered truthfully. “My roommate Mary is in love with the idea though for some reason. I’m sorry I freaked out last week, I just felt really scared all of the sudden.”

“I think I would have to in your situation,” Court answered. “What did Mary have to say?”

“That she thinks this may be the right thing for me, even though she’s a pretty dedicated Christian, which surprised me. I think I have a bigger hang up about my beliefs than she does. But she said she wants to see me happy with someone, and has yet to see that in the past,” Kris finished.

“Wow, I’m surprised you told her,” Court said, looking genuinely amazed.

“Well, I didn’t really. She figured it out for herself.”

“Ahhh, that makes sense. Sometimes, our friends know more about us than we do it seems. When I started coming out, I guess the most surprising thing was that a lot of people said they knew already!” Court said, looking amused. “So, I have to ask, just to be sure. Is this something you really want to explore?”

“I think so,” Kris answered truthfully. “I keep thinking about our kiss the other day, and I just felt so good about it after, even after I freaked out.”

“That’s good to hear,” Court answered, taking Kris’s hand. Court looked up into Kris’s eyes, and lightly brushed her hair back out of her eyes. “You have such a beautiful face, why hide it?”

Kris smiled at Court’s comment. Instead of answering, she leaned forward and pulled Court closer to her. She leaned in to meet Court’s waiting lips, her eyes closing as she felt her lips brush Court’s. A warmth passed through her as she felt the light kiss, the tinges of want starting to form. Court moved as if to pull back, but Kris reached forward and pulled her back, pressing her lips against Court. This kiss wasn’t about a promise or a kiss of sisterhood, this was a kiss of desire. Kris felt her lips part, welcoming the feeling as Court’s tongue teased hers.

Kris leaned forward, wanting to press the kiss further, but was answered with Court pulling back. Court instead pulled her into a tight hug, Kris feeling her desire grow as she felt her body press against Court’s. They hugged each other tightly, neither wanting to let go. Kris could feel a few tears forming in her eyes, wanting this moment to last as long as possible. Court eventually let her arms fall, and moved a little apart from Kris. Kris looked surprised for a second, not sure why Court was pulling away. The two women looked at each other for a few seconds, the glow of the kiss filling both of them.

Kris broke the silence first as a nagging question pulled at her. “That was amazing,” Kris said, slightly blushing. “Why did you pull away?”

“Because I want this to go slow, and for you to be comfortable,” Court answered, trying to sound calm. It would have worked if Kris didn’t notice the deep breaths she was still taking. “I just don’t want to push you.”

“I appreciate that, thank you.” Kris answered.

“You’re welcome,” Court said, a smile growing. “You are one good kisser!”

“You’re not bad yourself,” Kris said as she blushed.

“I pretty much guessed that since that you pulled me in closer to you, that you liked it!” Court said with a laugh.

“Yeah, I guess so!” Kris laughed.

“Okay, well, one awkward part of the afternoon is over, and I’d say things went pretty well there. Are you ready for the second part?”

Kris blushed, knowing what was probably coming. She managed a slow nod, suddenly not wanting to speak. They hadn’t mentioned diapers since meeting yet, and Kris could see the questions on the tip of Court’s tongue.

With seeing Kris’s answer, Court stood up and took Kris’s hand. She gestured for her to stand up, and began a graceful glide over to one of the closed doors at the far end of the living room. Court opened the door, and Kris stared in wonder, her mouth slightly open.

“Welcome to the other side of the looking glass, Alice,” she heard Court whisper to her.

Chapter 15 - Hidden Dreams

Kris walked through the threshold with Court standing behind her. Courts arms embraced her in a hug from behind, as Kris took in the quiet room. The walls were painted a faint lavender color that gave the room a very open look. Lining the top of the walls near the ceiling was a strip of white wall paper featuring balloons and circus animals. Various paintings hung on the walls here and there, but one in particular caught Kris’s attention. It was of a little girl ballerina performing a curtsy for an audience of stuffed animals. She stared at the painting for a while, unable to draw her eyes off of it, thinking it one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen. Kris moved on, and saw a pair of shear, white curtains hung over a large bay window on the side of the room. The curtains were tied back on the sides with a large pink bow.

In the corner of the room lay a large, queen size bed. It was covered with a thick quilt of interwoven patches of pink and white squares, and at the top, laid six thick pillows leaning against the wall. The bed also had a canopy attached to white-washed wooden poles. The canopy was tied back on the opening to the bed, but Kris could see a shear, white material tumbling down the back and far side of the bed. Kris ran her hand over the bed for a moment, losing herself in the softness of it all. Next to the bed lay a small nightstand, in a matching white wash, topped with a small light. Opposite the bed in the other corner lay a veritable jungle of stuffed animals laying on a fairly long table. Kris smiled to herself as she looked them over, but was most taken in by a large white teddy bear. It’s big black eyes just seemed to be looking straight back at Kris, and the fur looked like it was made out of the softest material. Kris wished she could hold the bear, just for a minute, but didn’t want to disturb any of Court’s things. Kris took in the table, and was surprised to find a plastic mattress at the bottom of the stuffed animals, and the small railing that lined the back of it. Kris noticed that the front had a number of draws, and two cabinets built in near the floor. She looked at it with a confused look for a second, and then tore her eyes back towards the rest of the room. The last piece of furniture in the room was a large rocking chair that rested near, what Kris assumed, was a closet door. The chair was white washed in the same shade as the canopy bed posts, and Kris could see that it was finely made. She thought it might be oak, but wasn’t quite sure. A cushion lined the seat and back of the chair, and Kris could tell that it was easily somewhere you could fall asleep. Kris saw a line of small pink hearts lining the top of the chair.

Kris kept staring wide eyed at the room, and barely felt Court leading her over to the bed. Court put her arms around Kris for a second, holding her, and Kris was thankful for her calming presence. After a what seemed like an eternity, Kris dragged her eyes off of the dazzling room, and stared up at Court. Kris could see she wore a silly grin, and blushed slightly as Kris looked up at her. “This… this is amazing,” was all Kris could manage to say.

“Thank you, I’m so glad you liked it,” Court said, as Kris could feel some of the tension ease out of her. “Now you know why I work all of those overtime hours on the weekends.”

“I guess so. I just can’t believe all this,” Kris said, still feeling stunned. She watched as Court walked over to the table, and pulled out the white bear that Kris was looking at earlier. Court hugged the bear for a second, and then walked back, gently giving her to Kris. Kris clutched the bear to her breast, feeling the soft fur against her neck and face as she cradled her. Tears began falling down her cheeks, the feelings starting to overwhelm her as Court held her in a comforting hug. The teddy bear soon fell to the side, as Kris leaned her face against Court’s neck, the tears fading into the occasional sniffle as she tried to figure out what she was feeling. She felt Court’s hands gently rubbing her head and back, and heard the soft whisper of ‘there, there’ drifting down to her.

“This is the most beautiful room I’ve ever seen,” Kris mumbled still leaning against Court.

“I’m so glad you think so,” Court said, a mark of pride in her voice.

“I feel so overwhelmed by all of this. I don’t think I could even begin to describe how I’m feeling right now,” Kris said, hoping Court would understand.

“I know, it’s a lot to take in. Would you like to take a nap? You look drained right now.”

Kris looked around the room and closed her eyes, for the first time, letting a dream of the room take hold of her. “I’d love that, very much.”

Court broke out in a wide smile. “You have no idea how happy this is making me. I hope this doesn’t make you uncomfortable, but would you like a diaper for your nap?”

Kris thought she heard a mumbled ‘baby’ after Court was finished speaking, but didn’t think much of it with what Court was asking. She thought about how wonderful a diaper felt during her naps at home lately, and felt the dream of being in this room tugging at her again. After a few seconds, she managed a weak nod, feeling unable to utter the words.

“Why don’t you lay down,” Court said as she walked over to the table with the stuffed animals and opened one of the cabinet doors. Kris was awed at the sight - stacks and stacks of various diapers, each looking a little different. She watched Court as she picked up one of the white diapers, as Kris settled onto the bed, feeling the softness of the bed as she sank into it. She closed her eyes, clutching the white teddy bear to her, lost in the feelings that were taking hold of her. She heard Court opening some of the draws in the table, and opened her eyes to see Court placing a bundle of things down on the nightstand. Kris looked up with a careless grin as Court gently touched the side of her face. Court leaned down and gave Kris a light kiss on her cheek and one on her forehead.

“Would you like me to leave so you can put it on?” Court asked in a whisper.

Kris looked up for a moment into Court’s eyes, and felt emotion after emotion pulling at her. She felt tears starting to bubble up, not knowing what she was feeling or why. She gazed up at Court, feeling as if her entire soul was being laid bare before her, crying for acceptance. Court gently took Kris in her arms and rocked her for a second, whisper ‘hush’ to her every few moments. Court brushed her hand through Kris’s hair, and bent over to Kris’s ear. “Would you like some help baby?”

Kris looked up, shocked for a moment, and then settled back down. Court looked down at her, and Kris could see the understanding in her eyes. She closed her eyes, and for the first time, didn’t care about feeling vulnerable. She didn’t feel ashamed of her feelings, or worry about what Court thought of her. Feeling completely let go, she reached over and squeezed Court’s hand, a silent yes given in answer to her question.

Court stood up for a second and placed a plastic mat down on the bed, and turned Kris so that her legs were dangling over the edge. Court began humming a soft melody as she lifted the bottom of Kris’s top, and gently rubbed her belly for a few seconds. Kris felt her legs press together for a moment instinctively, but soon felt herself relaxing again as Court’s soft hands continued to rub. Kris giggled for a few seconds as Court tickled the side of her waist, but fell back and relaxed as she felt Court gently unbuttoning the top of Kris’s pants. She lifted herself for a second, helping Court to slide them off her, feeling the coolness of

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 16 - Awakenings

Stretching her legs slightly, Kris slowly opened her eyes an hour or two later. She was surprised to find a patchwork quilt over her, and figured that Court must have gotten a blanket for the two of them at some point. Court had rolled over to her back at some point, but Kris could feel that she still had her arm and hand pressed against her, almost as if she couldn’t be separated from her. Kris rolled over quietly, and looked over the still sleeping Court. She was truly a beautiful woman, especially with the peaceful look of sleep settling over her. Her long red hair was tumbled all over the pillow giving her a strong aura of beauty. She had slipped into a t-shirt at some point, and a pair of white cotton panties covered her. Kris felt her arms for second, loving the feel of the ivory skin under her finger tips. Her arms were finely toned, showing that she was at least partly athletic. She had a gentle curve to her hips, giving just enough of an accent to make them noticeable. She looked to have ‘A-cup’ breasts, which suited her body perfectly. Kris’s face heated suddenly, feeling ashamed that she was admiring Court like this.

Kris moved Court’s arm up a little bit, and quietly came to rest her head on Court’s chest. Her arm found its way across Court’s middle, resting comfortably as their legs became intertwined, her diaper gently rubbing against Court. She felt Court stir a little for a moment, but she settled back into sleep a few moments later. Kris squeezed her softly, feeling for all the world that everything was wonderful, that all the problems, all the worries in the world were going to be alright. “Is this what love is,” Kris wondered softly to herself. “Is this what I’ve really been missing in the past? I’ve never felt this way before. Am I doing the right thing? God, but she’s beautiful.” Her thoughts kept wandering back to how Court had diapered her, all the care that she put into it to make Kris feel comfortable, and loved. She smiled to herself, and gently kissed the side of Court’s chest, a silent thank you for coming into her life.

As she laid against Court, Kris felt a tingle between her legs, and knew what that meant. She thought for a few minutes, wondering what to do as the pressure started to build. She looked for a bathroom briefly, but really didn’t want to move and disturb Court. “Who am I kidding,” she thought to herself. “I know what I want to do. What would Court think though?” She eyed Court for a moment and looked up into her face, remembering her diapering. “She wouldn’t care, would she?”

Kris felt Court stir against her for a second as Court put an arm around her. Court opened her eyes and looked down at Kris with a smile and gently stroked her hair for a second. She looked thoughtfully for a few seconds and whispered “Go ahead angel” softly to Kris. Kris, more from shock then anything else, felt a little warmth spread between her legs, and quickly squeezed her legs to stop the flow. She looked up again to see Court with a secretive smile. She felt Court’s other arm moved across to touch the top of her diaper, and felt it move slowly down so her hand rested in the middle.

“It’ll be okay, I promise,” she heard Court whisper again.

Kris still felt uneasy about wetting in front of Court though. She felt Court’s hand softly rub her diaper in slow circles. The smooth motion relaxed Kris a little, and she felt a small trickle flow out of her, and a little ting of wetness slowly spread. She felt the warmth relax her, and soon found her body completely letting go, as she felt her diaper beginning to sag as she wet it. Court smiled at her when she felt the heat coming from her diaper, and embraced Kris in a warm hug. Kris felt herself blush a little, not being used to hugging people as she wet. She felt the flow start to ebb a little, and happily enjoyed the feeling of the wet diaper pushing against her. She looked up to see Court still smiling down at her.

“Good morning baby,” Court said.

Kris yawned slightly as she stretched, feeling the wetness press against her a little more. “Good morning. I slept so well.”

“Me too,” Court replied. “I barely remember climbing up here. Or how your head ended up on my chest!”

“Just kind of happened,” Kris said with a giggle, “I hope you’re okay with what I did,” she continued, turning more serious.

“Oh baby, that’s what diapers are for, so don’t be so worried about it. It’s not going to be much to clean you up either,” Court answered with a smile.

Kris leaned up to kiss Court’s cheek, but instead felt Court’s arm push her up. Kris took the hint, and slowly slid her body over Court’s until she straddled her. She looked down for a second, seeing her diapered middle resting across Court’s tummy, and jumped as she felt the middle of the diaper rub against her sensitive areas. She leaned down and kissed Court, feeling her diapered butt push out, and the wetness spread a little. As she lifted the t-shirt, the soft curves drew her in as her hands wandered down Court’s body, past the subtle curve of her breasts, past the enticing groove of her waist and down to the silky thighs. Kris noticed a small freckle on Court’s left breast, and gave a loving kiss to the spot, and softly touched it with the tip of her tongue. She could see the want in Court’s eyes starting to build as her hands wandered closer to the middle of Court’s panties. She felt Court’s arms pull her down into a hug.

“Not yet angel, it’s too soon,” Court whispered. “And the wrong way.”

Kris pulled up a little, trying to control the desire that was going through her. She couldn’t understand what was wrong - Court wanted her and she wanted Court! She leaned down to kiss Court again, but instead felt Court pull away a little bit, looking up at Kris.

“Trust me,” was all that Court said. She slowly slid out from under Kris. She went over to the table holding the stuffed animals and pulled out a sheet of plastic from one of the draws underneath. She walked back over and laid it on the bed, and gestured for Kris to come and lay on it.

“What is this?” Kris asked confused.

“Well, a changing pad. We can’t have the bed getting wet, now can we?” Court answered smiling.

“You’re going to change me?” Kris asked surprisingly.

“Of course, I wouldn’t expect you to do it alone.” Court said with a warmth in her voice that just melted Kris. “Do you want me to?” Court said suddenly, sounding a little worried.

“What do you think?” Kris said with a giggle as she stretched herself over the changing pad. Her giggling changed to glee as she felt the pad crinkle under her.

Court came over and touched Kris’s legs softly. She felt around to the back of her knees and slowly raised them so that Kris’s feet were just resting on the edge of the bed, her legs spread wide and her diaper easily reached. Court slowly untapped the diaper, and Kris shivered a little as the first breezes of chilly air went past her diaper area. She squeezed her legs instinctively, and felt Court’s warm hands rubbing her inner thighs to coax her into opening up again. Kris relaxed, and felt Court slowly peeling the wet diaper off of her. Court pulled a couple of baby wipes out of a container resting on the table on the other side of the room, and quickly wiped Kris’s diaper area. She laughed as Kris hiked her butt up higher into the air, trying to make it easy on her.

“Do you want another one on?” Court asked.

Kris regrettably shook her head. “I have to get home at some point before my roommate worries too-too much.”

“Okay, so smelling too much like baby powder is probably a bad idea,” Court answered with a giggle, “but I bet it’d be funny.” She opened a draw in the nightstand and Kris heard her pump something for a few seconds. “How about a little strawberry moisturizer to keep your skin nice and smooth?”

Court reached down and began rubbing in the cold cream. Kris felt her hand moving all over her tummy and in between her thighs, and lost herself in the touch. She felt Court’s hand slow for a time, almost as if she was wondering about something. After a moment, Kris felt Court’s hand start to move slowly towards her private area. Kris could feel herself losing herself in Court’s touch, and feel herself becoming wet in a different way. Court smiled down at her, and leaned down to kiss Kris as her fingers gently ran along the outside of Kris’s nether lips. Kris reached up and put her arms around Court’s head and held her in the kiss, and felt Court’s fingers move a little deeper, becoming a little more sure of what they were doing.

Kris gasped when her clit was rubbed, and looked up to see Court smiling down at her. She pushed herself against Court, wanting attention in every possible way, feeling herself burn with the need. Desire was consuming her, coming from all around - Court’s lips, her diapering earlier in the day, the warmth of her wet diaper, the curve of Courtney’s breast. Even the smell of baby powder that hung silently in the room seemed to be pulling at her, screaming for some kind of release. She pressed herself against Court, trying to let her know how much she needed her. She felt her breaths coming in deep bursts, her chest rising and falling quickly. She felt Court’s hand tease her for a few moments more, lightly touching here and there, bringing the promise of more attention.

Court closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, and covered Kris’s middle with her hand for a second. Kris arched her back as Court deeply kissed her, feeling more and more with every moment. As she reached up to pull Court down to her again, she felt Court pull away from her, her hand trailing away. Kris squeezed her legs together in frustration, and ran her hands through her hair, trying to understand what was happening. She shut her eyes and covered herself with her hands, feeling a tinge of embarrassment at her want, thinking about all the reasons that Court had rejected her. She turned away as she felt tears starting to fall down her cheeks, clutching the white bear to her breast.

“What did I do wrong?” Kris asked, feeling a few sobs starting to bubble up.

Court reached over and rubbed her arm, trying to comfort her. “Nothing at all!” she said with a strong conviction. “I don’t know what say Kris, but I’ll do my best. I know what you wanted to do, and I really, really wanted to. But it’s not right.”

“Why?” Kris blurted out, still not understanding.

“Because… it’s too fast for one thing. We only just met. Believe me, I know what you’re feeling right now, the pull to someone you’re attracted to. But you’ve never done this before, and I have to think about that. I don’t want to feel like I’m taking advantage of you,” Court said, hoping to reach an understanding. “And there is also the diapers to think about.”

“What do you mean by that?” Kris asked, her teary eyes starting to dry a little.

“Well, I want to know that you want to be with me for me, and not because of an attraction to diapers, or by being babied by someone. I just don’t feel right mixing the two our first time. I hope you can understand that,” Court said.

“I guess that makes some sort of sense,” Kris said. “I AM attracted to you though, more then I can say. I’ve never felt this way with anyone before.” The conviction of her words surprised Court for a second, but she quickly recovered.

“I sure hope so, because I can’t tell you how much I’ve enjoyed being with you, both when talking and napping! It took about all of my willpower not to let this go further!” Court answered, shaking her head.

“Well, that’s great. Why couldn’t YOU be the one to be teased today instead of me?” Kris said, feeling a little better.

“Oh, I think I was teased plenty,” Court answered with a deep breath. “But if we do like each other Kris, I want it to be built the right way, you know?” Court waited for Kris’s answering nod before continuing as she pulled Kris into her arms. “I’m sorry for what I did baby, I shouldn’t have let it go so far. But now I think we have an idea of the kind of things you enjoy with diaper play.”

“I’d say so! But I think I understand what you’re saying, and I’ll be a good girl from now on and try to be less neurotic.”

“I think that’s understandable with everything that’s been going on. How about this? Why don’t you finish getting dressed, and we’ll go get something to eat. Plain and normal, no teasing. Well, I have to tease a little, but not much, okay?” Court finished with a giggling fit, and Kris could see an evil gleam in her eye.

“That sounds really nice. I’ll call my roommate to let her know so she doesn’t worry.”

Court leaned over and kissed Kris as she cradled her, holding her tightly. She kissed the tops of her eyelids and softly put her down on the bed. She leaned over and whispered quietly to Kris. “If this is our first date baby, I can’t wait to see what happens on the second.”

Chapter 17 - Childhood

Kris and Court had a quiet dinner at a small corner café, complete with a few glasses of wine and entirely too much said. Kris felt as if she couldn’t hold anything back from Court, and couldn’t believe some of the stories she was telling about her childhood and current life. Court also learned some of Kris’s ‘odder’ habits as well, complete with her love of ketchup on pizza and all. For her part, Court was very forthcoming as well, talking all about how she came to live here. Kris felt as though she could talk about anything, and Court would just smile and gladly talk about the subject.

“So how did you get involved with diapers to begin with?” Kris said as she opened a new line of conversation. “It’s only fair, since you’ve pretty much seen all of how I’ve come to it!”

“It started when I was about seven or eight, I can’t really remember how old. I don’t know what it was, but I suddenly started having problems at night. I’d wet the bed two or three times a week, and my mom got a bit sick of it after a while. She was very supportive and all, but didn’t really want to wash sheets all week! So one night, she called me into her bedroom, and I saw a bag laying on the floor. She sat me down and had a little talk with me, about how I needed something to help keep me dry, how it wasn’t anything to be embarrassed about, you name it. When she first showed me the ‘protective underwear’ she bought, I ran out of the room crying. Well, a little later after I had calmed down, she made some hot chocolate, and we sat down to talk some more. She hugged me and told me that everything would be okay, and that it was no big deal.”

Kris nodded along to everything Court had said. “You’re mom sounds amazing.”

“She is,” Court answered with a smile. “So, after that, we ‘tried them out’. She asked me if I wanted help, kind of like how I asked you earlier in the day, and I nodded yes. I really didn’t want to touch them!”

Kris blushed at the mentioning of her diapering earlier in the day. “I’m sure. Or was there something else going on also?”

“I’ve been wondering about that for a long time too! Maybe, even though I really didn’t want to be diapered in my head, maybe my soul had other ideas. But either way, she diapered me with as much care and concern as I saw her do with my little brother when he was little, without the slightest look that this was strange. She was just a mom taking care of her daughter as far as she was concerned.”

“That’s amazing,” Kris said with a smile. “So how is it that you never got taken back out?”

“Well, after the first diapering, it was no big deal, and I found that I actually didn’t mind wearing them. When they were on, I didn’t have to worry about anything. Bedwetting wasn’t a big deal, because diapers are supposed to get wet! I also just remember being more relaxed, and felt I could be more myself. I used to love playing with my brother’s baby toys when he was little, but always felt a little ashamed. With a diaper already on, I didn’t care about that. I guess to my little seven year old mind, someone in diapers was supposed to play with baby toys!”

“Aaaawwwww,” Kris said. “I can already imagine you playing with a baby doll!”

Court giggled. “Well, you kind of got to see that this afternoon with you! I’m too little to have a baby of my own!”

“I guess that’s true,” Kris said laughing. “You did a good job of diapering someone though. Or is that something? So this went on throughout your whole childhood?”

Court looked down for a moment. “No, I wish it did though. After a while, my father started to get upset at my behavior, and didn’t understand why the embarrassment of being in diapers wasn’t causing me to stop acting out by wetting the bed. My mom shielded me for the most part from him, but that just led to problems between them. After a while, the fights started getting worse.” Court looked down for a minute, and Kris knew this wasn’t easy for her to talk about. “After some especially loud fights, my dad started taking me to a therapist to figure out how to get me to stop ‘acting out’, as he put it. That’s where embarrassment started to come in. With my mom, diapers and bedwetting were no big deal. Between my dad and therapist making me feel like I was always doing something wrong, I started to always feel like I was tied up in knots. Even diapers started to be no fun, since I would get mocked by my father all the time for wearing them.”

“Asshole,” Kris mumbled. “So what happened?”

“Well, because of my father telling me all the time that the fights between him and my mother were always my fault, I started to get really upset. I convinced my mom to take me out of diapers because of it. I was nine by this time. I started to put a folded towel under me when I slept to try and keep the bed safe, which didn’t work too badly. I’m sure my mom noticed the extra laundry, but never said anything. I think she knew what I was trying to do, and regretted that she couldn’t protect me more. But it convinced my dad that I was getting better, and of course, it was all thanks to him,” Court said, shuddering a little.

“Asshole,” Kris said again.

“Such language on someone who was in diapers earlier today!” Court said with a laugh.

Kris’s face heated slightly. “Yeah, I guess. But still. How are your parents today?”

“Not together anymore thankfully, but that’s a whole separate story. But, to make a long story short, needed diapers and found that I really love wearing them, and that I have nothing to really be ashamed of. It took me a while to get past what my father had done to me. I used the towels right through college, which I have to admit, almost caused me a lot of problems at times!”

“You still wet at night?” Kris asked in surprise.

Court nodded, “Yes, it never really got better. Probably because I didn’t really care if it did or not! I can sleep for small intervals without a problem, but always make sure I go before laying down. After college when I moved down here, I was in a drugstore and walked past an aisle with adult diapers, and just felt myself wanting them for some reason. So, went through exactly what you did with the anxiety of buying them, and haven’t looked back since!”

“That’s a sweet story, much better then my ‘bored on a Friday night’ story!” Kris laughed.

“Well, to each their own!” Court said while laughing with Kris. She reached across the table they were sitting at and took Kris’s hand. “I think this is the first time I’ve ever told how all this started. It felt nice to share.”

“I’m glad, and that’s what I’m here for you know!” Kris answered.

“That’s what I’m hoping,” Court said smiling.

“Have you ever thought of telling all this to your mom? She sounds really understanding.”

“She is. But I couldn’t,” Court said looking down.

“Why not? Aren’t you the one always talking about being proud of yourself?” Kris said while squeezing Court’s hand.

Court looked up with a little bit more fire in her eyes. “I’d like to, but she has enough to deal with in terms of me, and she doesn’t deserve that right now. Coming out to her was difficult enough on her! Adding diapers may get me committed!”

“Well, how did she handle that?”

“What, me being gay?” Court asked. She continued after Kris’s silent nod. “She was pretty okay with everything, but went through a lot when one of my brothers rejected me, and blamed her for supporting me. She just wants me to be happy, and the family together.”

“Exactly,” Kris answered. “From what you’ve said of her so far, I don’t think you liking diapers or still needing them will change that.”

“I suppose not,” Court said absentmindedly.

“Something to think about!” Kris said with a laugh. “It’s nice to give some ‘pride-talk’ back to you!”

“Just remember, that I may be saying this to you in the future!” Court said as her smile returned. “I’ll think about what you said though.”

“Good!” Kris said smiling. “Well, it’s late and think I have to get home. Mary already has more then enough reason to grill me with questions for the next week!”

“And speaking of next week, would you want to get together again?”

“Saturday sound good again?” Kris offered.

“Sounds great!” Court answered.

“My place this time?” Kris said. “I have to introduce you to Mary at some point or she may very well explode.”

“Ooh, fun.” Court said laughing. “I think I’d like to see that, but don’t want to have you cleaning the mess up all weekend.” Court leaned over and softly kissed Kris, and softly whispered a good-bye.

Kris returned home shortly after leaving the café, still feeling the effects of the bottle of wine she and Court had shared. Her eyes wanted to close in the worst way as she fumbled with her keys, just trying to get through the apartment and into bed. She had realized halfway back that she shouldn’t have driven, and was sure a lecture from Mary was going to be given in due time. As she opened the door and saw the dark interior, she said a quick prayer of thanks that Mary wasn’t there waiting for her.

After bumping her way across the common room, Kris happily opened her door and stripped down as she headed towards the bed. She felt the room tilt a little, forcing her to hold onto the dresser as she removed her shoes and socks. After tugging off her pants, she collapsed on top of the covers, glad that she didn’t have to move anymore. Thoughts about the talk with Court kept going through her mind, along with all the feelings and sensations of her earlier diapering. Kris closed her eyes slowly while pressing her lower belly, glad for the warm feelings that carried her to sleep.

She could only hope her dreams would be as warm.

Chapter 18 - What Dreams may Come

Kris’s fretful sleep was full of dreams during the night. The dreams, images more then anything else in truth, came with more intensity then usual. Scenes from her childhood played themselves out - innocent dreams of her birthdays or Christmas, and occasionally not so innocent dreams that usually ended with her having teary eyes and a red bottom. Slowly, her dreams shifted, until thoughts of diapers and Court began filling them. The diapering, kissing and cuddling were beyond vivid thanks to her alcohol-induced sleep.

A different sort of dream slowly took hold of her as night began to wane. Looking down at herself, Kris realized that a diaper was surrounding her, the padding so thick that she could barely squeeze her legs together. Walking seemed foreign to her somehow, almost as if she couldn’t quite remember how to do it. Her knees felt unsure to her, and a few steps found Kris falling to the floor on her tush. She barely felt the fall, and for the first time felt thankful for the cushioned diaper that she was wearing. Her head turned back and forth, trying to take in the room but not trusting her legs enough to walk around it. She squirmed around trying to see everything, and almost rolled onto her back before catching herself.

The walls were painted a faint blue color with a shading that reminded Kris of a noon sky in the middle of Summer. She thought she could almost see clouds drifting across the walls, and blinked a few times in confusion. A few paintings hung on the walls, mainly landscapes showing different places. Kris felt drawn to one in particular, one featuring children at play in the middle of a snowstorm, with a warm-looking house intricately drawn in the background. A thick, dark green carpet covered the floors, and matching curtains hung from the one window she could see. Looking out through the window at the tree tops showed that she was up pretty high, maybe in an apartment or something like that, she figured, but everything looked a little distorted. She could see the back of a white couch with a high back, and underneath she could see a bunch of children’s toys scattered around.

“Toys!” she said before she could stop herself. She shook her head for a second. “Toys?” she thought for a minute. She looked around for a moment, and was relieved that there wasn’t anyone else around. She tried to stand up to walk over to where the toys were placed, but found that she couldn’t quite get up all the way. Every time she managed to get up to her feet, she’d lean a little too far over one way and find herself tumbling back down. “I guess there is such a thing as too thick a diaper,” she giggled to herself. She gave up after a few tries, and started a slow crawl over to the toys, the crinkle of her diaper announcing every movement. She flopped down behind the couch and began picking through the toys, and ended up picking out a baby doll from the pile.

She cradled the baby in her arms, not sure why she was doing it, but felt that the baby was important and needed to be cared for. She rocked the baby gently in her arms, and even checked her diaper with a giggle. Kris lost herself in the play, gladly picking out toys of all sorts - toys with lots of blinking lights that glowed when she pushed a button, one that played different music when she pushed a key, and even a little merry-go-round that would turn slowly when she pushed the large red button on the base! Kris giggled with delight every time she figured out how to do something, and would do it again and again feeling just as proud. She felt something pulling at her, almost as if this was wrong somehow, but couldn’t quite form the thoughts. Whenever she had a real thought come to her, she would hear another bell go off or another light turn on and lose herself in the wonder of it.

Kris felt a tingle between her legs but didn’t pay much mind to it. After a little bit, she started to feel a sleepiness come over her. She picked up her baby in her arms, and started to crawl slowly over to the couch, hoping to rest there. After crawling to the side of the couch, she felt her arm slip and she landed in the soft carpeting. She felt her eyes closing, and decided the rug was definitely comfy enough to sleep on. As she started to drift off, she heard a voice above her talk softly.

“Done playing, baby?” the voice said. “It looks like someone needs a nap, but you have to eat before you can, you know that.” The voice held nothing but warmth, and seemed to just sooth Kris deeper into sleep. She opened her eyes a little bit, and looked up to see the image of a woman standing there. Kris couldn’t make out any of her features. Her face seemed to be framed by a soft light overhead, keeping her face in shadows. “Well, let’s get you taken care of,” the voice said. Even without seeing what she looked like, Kris felt her heart tug with want. She felt an indescribable love for the woman, but couldn’t understand why.

Kris reached her arms up, knowing she wanted to be closer to the woman. She felt soft hands envelope her as she flew up into the air, giggling as she was spun about. She felt a pair of lips press against her belly and blow. It tickled so much that Kris felt her arms and legs flailing with laughter. She looked down and saw the front of the couch for the first time. Its cushions were snow white, and looked really thick and soft, the kind of couch that you just seemed to sink into. She watched the woman settle into the couch and cradle Kris in her arms against her breast.

Kris couldn’t shake the feeling that this was wrong somehow, but lost the thought as she felt something press against her mouth. She opened her mouth to protest but felt the object slip between her lips. Kris bit down for a second, and was answered with the taste of warm milk on her tongue. The flavor was one of the sweetest things she had ever tasted, which didn’t make sense to her somehow. The thought seemed to drift off as she felt her eyes closing as she slowly suckled on the nipple. Her arms moved up and gripped the side of the bottle, worried that it was going to be taken away.

“That’s a good baby,” the woman hummed, and Kris felt a glee settle over her at the praise. The woman began softly humming a few slow notes that seemed hypnotic to Kris. She felt her belly fill with the warm milk as she kept suckling, and even cried once when the woman meant to pull the bottle from her. She settled back into drinking when the woman relented and put the bottle back to her lips.

Kris started to feel full from the milk, and felt the woman slowly withdraw the bottle. Kris felt a little milk still in her mouth, and gasped when she felt a little dribble down her chin. The woman chided her with a gentle ‘Tsk, tsk’ as she wiped her chin, and Kris giggled as the woman tickled her for a second. Kris felt her eyes become very heavy, and felt herself stifle a yawn, not wanting to feel anymore milk dribble down her face.

“Are you sleepy still baby? You’re being such a good girl for mommy today,” Kris heard the woman whisper. Kris knew she should find the name mommy wrong somehow, but when the woman said it, Kris felt nothing but love. She felt her belly being rubbed, and the darkness of sleep starting to settle over her as she stretched her legs. The woman was gently rocking, the motion soothing her even more as the woman, mommy, kept humming softly. Kris felt a warm trickle between her legs but didn’t pay much attention to it, too lost in the magic of the dream.

“I love you baby,” she heard mommy say softly. “Have wonderful dreams as long as you can.”

Kris woke with a start, the dream feeling so real that she expected to still be cradled in mommy’s arms. The chill in the night air brought her back as a coldness settled over her skin bringing goose bumps. She shivered slightly and reached over to pull her comforter over on top of her. When she moved she felt cold, damp cloth touch her privates. She reached down and touched her clammy skin, disbelieving the wet feel that greeted her fingers. She reached over and clicked on her light, shutting her eyes for a second at the sudden rush of light. She looked down slowly, her jaw hanging open as she took in what had happened. A large wet spot covered the top of her comforter where she had fallen to sleep during the night. She shivered at the sight, and at thoughts of the dream she had, wondering what it all meant.

She sat up and began a slow walk to her bathroom, her wet panties a cold reminder of what had happened. As she peeled off the wet undergarment, a soft knock emanated through the room. Kris’s spun around and stood frozen, her eyes darting back and forth between the door, the wet spot on her bed, and the wet panties that were still around her knees.

Kris almost fainted when she heard Mary’s voice asking if she was okay, as the knob slowly turned.

Chapter 19 - Choices

As the door started to slide open, Kris threw herself against the back of it. The door slammed with a loud bang, and a loud ‘What the heck?’ from Mary. Kris sagged against the door as tears threatened to come pouring out.

“I’m sorry Mary, but I’m… I’m busy right now,” Kris said, trying to think of something to say. “I just need to be alone right now. Thank you for checking on me though.”

“Well, okay,” Mary said sounding confused. “You know where I am if you want to come and talk to me.”

“Thanks, we’ll see,” Kris answered. She closed her eyes and softly fell to the floor, wincing when she felt the damp panties touch her skin. She pushed them down her legs and tossed them onto the tiled bathroom floor with her foot, glad to have them off. She looked at them for a second as revulsion coursed through her. Diapers were fine, they were meant to wet in. But panties were something else all together, and Kris couldn’t help but feel ashamed of her accident. She closed her eyes, feeling the weight of what had happened push at her. Her head was throbbing as if a there was an airplane flying overhead. She felt her head sag for a second as the pounding grew.

When Kris next looked up, she saw sunlight streaming through the window almost reaching her foot. She looked at her clock and couldn’t believe that it was nearly ten o’clock. She blinked a few times to clear her eyes, and slowly stood up. She dragged her feet as she walked back to her bed, dreading what she knew was there. She touched the top of her comforter and shuddered a little when she felt the answering dampness. She slowly stripped the comforter off and winced when she saw a dark patch on her top sheet. She drew that off as well, and tossed it on top of the comforter. She was glad to see the wetness didn’t get much further, and that her mattress was okay. “Thank you for small blessings,” she mumbled as she turned back to the door.

She knew that Mary would be out there, she usually was on Sunday after her usual church time of eight o’clock. Her head started to hurt again, and Kris willed herself to calm down. Different stories started going through her about what she could tell Mary, even one involving that she had Court stay over. She laughed at herself over that one. There was no way Mary would believe that for openers, and Kris couldn’t believe that she thought that was easier then just telling Mary she had an accident. After a few minutes, she just decided to wing it, not knowing what she would end up telling her.

After wandering to her draws, Kris selected her track suit so she’d at least be able to use jogging as an excuse if she felt the need to leave. As she pulled on her short crew-cut socks, she eyed the wet pile in the corner of the room. She knew she had to do something about them before a permanent stain was left, but the washing machine and dryer were located in a closet on the side of the kitchen. Her face heated at the thought that Mary would see her putting her wet linens in the machine, but she couldn’t think of what else to do. She thought of rinsing her things out in the sink in the bathroom, and decided she was being a fool. She was just doing her laundry, that was it, right?

Kris picked up her wet underwear from the bathroom and threw them in the middle of the pile and gathered it all up in her arms, being sure that no hint of a wet patch showed. She took a deep breath and opened the door a crack with her free hand, and then edged it open the rest of the way with her foot. As she expected, Mary sat on the couch in the middle of the room, reading a small hardcover book. Mary glanced up as Kris came into the room, and Kris thought she saw an eyebrow raise slightly. Mary quickly settled back into her book, which Kris was thankful for. She stepped quickly over to the kitchen, and breathed a sigh of relief when the sliding doors containing the washing machine and dryer were open and blocking Mary’s view of her.

“Good morning Mary, how are you today?” Kris asked, trying to break the silence.

“I’m okay,” Mary said. Kris waited for Mary to continue the conversation, but took the hint and didn’t try to talk to her again.

The sound of the washing machine clicking on seemed to shake the walls, announcing her accident to the whole apartment complex. Kris knew she was just imagining it, but either way, she was glad when she shut the doors to block the sound a little bit. She sat down on the carpet, and began a few light stretches. Her muscles still ached from a rough night of sleep, and was glad when they started to loosen up. One glance at Mary told her that she should be thankful she had her track suit on.

“Well, I’m going jogging. See you later?” Kris said as she spread out on the floor in her last stretch. As she started to stand up, Mary slapped the book close, the sound shocking Kris back down to the floor as it reverberated off the walls.

“I don’t think so. We need to talk,” Mary said in a business like tone. She sat up and looked down at Kris. Even with Mary just sitting there, it looked to Kris like she towered over her.

“About what?” Kris replied, trying to sound casual. From the way her voice quivered though, she didn’t think she was doing a very good job.

“Don’t be such a child. You know about what,” Mary replied. Kris shook at the look in Mary’s eyes. The usual humor in her eyes was replaced with a look that accepted no nonsense. The cold stare coming from Mary caused Kris to shiver slightly.

“Look,” Kris opened. “I’m really sorry about last night.”

“You should be,” Mary cut in.

Kris looked down for a moment, feeling her cheeks warm. “I know, I really didn’t mean anything by it,” she said truthfully.

“Yes, but it meant more then you meant it to, didn’t it?” Mary answered quickly. She pressed on, knowing that Kris was feeling vulnerable. “Is there anything you want to tell me?”

Kris felt very warm all of the sudden, and felt a few damp patches form around her body. She unzipped the top of her track suit a little bit to let some coolness in, and also to delay answering. “I’m not sure what to say Mary, I’ve just been really stressed lately.”

Mary shook her head sadly. “You know, at first, I thought you were being very adult about everything, but apparently that isn’t so.”

Kris looked into Mary’s eyes and saw a hurt there, along with hints of anger. “She knows I hid something from her,” Kris thought to herself, “and god, the only thing I’ve hidden are my diapers.” Kris felt her cheeks turn red, and looked down. Even with knowing that Mary likely knew, Kris kept up the pretense, hoping that she could escape this. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Mary.” She kept her eyes pinned on the carpet, and almost wished she could burrow into the floor.

“You know, you really are acting like a child,” Mary replied softly. “The fact that you were wearing diapers at one point, and from the look of the laundry this morning, stopped wearing them.”

Kris’s breath caught. It was one thing to suspect that Mary knew. It was another thing altogether to know she definitely did. Kris felt naked sitting in the middle of the floor, her secret being bared in front of her. She couldn’t manage a real answer, or to lift her head up, feeling embarrassment wash over her. “Last night was an accident,” she finally managed weakly.

“An accident?” Mary asked with a hint of sarcasm. “Please tell me how wetting your bed was an accident.” Kris’s shoulders slumped a little at the emphasis Mary put on ‘wetting.’

“Well, I drank a few glasses of wine last night with,” Kris began, and gaped when Mary cut in.

“You were drunk? That’s an excuse for wetting your bed?” Mary said in a disbelieving way.

Kris began to look up, feeling the need to defend herself. She dropped them back down to the carpet just as quickly as she met Mary’s eyes. “I guess not,” she stammered, feeling a little abashed.

“Well, it’s good to know that you’re not going to act like a complete child,” Mary said seriously. “Now that we have that out of the way, maybe we can talk about the problem that we have?”

“It’s not a problem, Mary,” Kris said looking up. “It was just one accident.”

Mary raised her eyebrows slightly. “Are you going to tell me that you bought diapers in anticipation of having an accident?”

Kris realized that she was in a no win situation. Either she admitted that she bought diapers to experiment and play with, or she admitted to having ‘nighttime problems.’ She rubbed her eyes for a few seconds, trying to figure out what to say. “No, I guess I didn’t,” Kris said, stating a simple truth that wasn’t quite a lie.

“Exactly. When Jay and I found out,” Mary began.

“Jay knows?” Kris said jumping up, her eyes going wide. “How? Why did you tell him?”

“I didn’t. He’s the one who saw the diapers in your room.” Mary answered simply. “But in either case, we thought you were being quite adult about this and handling a problem in an appropriate way. And then you started lying about it, shutting me out and slamming doors in people’s faces.” Mary’s voice continued to raise as she spoke, and Kris could see the hurt she caused her. Trust between friends was an important thing to Mary, and Kris knew she had bruised that.

“I’m really sorry Mary,” Kris said, feeling tears threatening to come out. “I was just embarrassed.”

“I’m sure, and I understood that, which is why I left you alone about everything, until I thought you’d be ready to talk. But I never expected things to get to the point where things like last night would happen. Between the wet sheets in the washing machine right now, and the way you’ve hurt our relationship, something has to change,” Mary stated as simple fact.

“What has to change?” Kris asked.

“Well, I don’t really want to see all that water and electricity being wasted every day so you can have dry sheets, and I also don’t wish to lose a friend who I truly value, even with a nighttime problem.” Mary began. Kris shivered when Mary mentioned a nighttime problem, realizing that she was lying by not speaking up. She kept quiet though, hoping to just get this over with. “It’s apparent from the wet patch I saw on your comforter that you can’t really be trusted to wear a diaper every night. The root problem of all three comes down to one thing.”

Kris shivered at the demeanor that Mary was handling this with, as if this was the most normal thing in the world. She just spoke a litany about wetting the bed with no more intensity then if she was discussing the weather. “What’s that?” Kris asked in genuine curiosity, wonder what Mary thought the problem was.

“It’s obvious that these problems all came because you didn’t feel you could talk to me,” Mary said. “And I’m thinking it’s probably because you were embarrassed, which I can understand. That doesn’t mean I think you’re right to feel embarrassed, but I can see how you would feel that way.”

Kris giggled for a second and saw Mary arch an eyebrow. “I’m sorry, you’re just reminding me of someone right now.”

Mary looked confused for a second and shook her head, remembering why they were sitting there talking. “Do you think what I said was true though?”

“I guess so,” Kris said as her face heated up a little, remembering last night when she was almost caught in wet underwear.

“So, we have to do something to get you past that embarrassment.” Mary said, certainty lending strength to her words.

Kris looked up feeling very confused. “What do you mean?”

“Well, we obviously can’t have you feeling embarrassed about diapers around me since it’s causing us a lot of problems,” Mary said simply. “So, my solution to it is to make a new house rule for you.” Mary smiled down at her, and Kris felt a little touch of worry settle over her.

“What rule?”

“I want to know you’re in your diaper before you go to bed so that I don’t have to worry about wet sheets every day. So from now on, at ten when you usually get ready for bed, you’ll only be allowed to wear a diaper around the house, and of course a pajama top or something. This way, I know your bed and sheets are safe, and you’ll hopefully learn not to let this upset you so much.”

“You can’t be serious! I’m not going to prance around the apartment in a diaper!” Kris said trying to sound as sure as possible about this.

“Yes you are,” Mary replied in a calm voice, “and I don’t appreciate temper tantrums. Until I at least feel that you’re okay enough with the fact that you need diapers at night.”

Kris felt a loud declaration of ‘I don’t need diapers at night!’ almost escape her lips, but held back after Mary’s temper tantrum comment. “There’s no way…” Kris said, feeling dumbfounded.

“Well, it’s either that, or the other option, which I hope won’t happen.” Mary answered.

“What’s that option?”

“We have five and a half months left on the lease. Enough time for us both to look for other roommates, but I hope it won’t come to that. You know how seriously I take friendships Kris, and I don’t want to see ours deteriorate over this, but I can see it happening if things keep on this way. I’m giving us a way to work past it, if you’ll take it.”

Kris felt suddenly trapped, and felt the impact of Mary’s words as they came into focus. She closed her eyes for a few moments, letting the hurt of the revelation that Mary would find another roommate abate a little. “Can I think about it?” Kris stammered through a few tears.

“Of course. You have until ten tonight,” Mary stated without emotion. “I’m sorry if what I said hurt you Kris, but you have to realize that you’ve hurt me quite a bit this week too. I’m not trying to guilt trip you into anything, I’m just telling you how I feel.” With that, Mary stood up and walked to her room, softly closing the door behind her.

Kris listened to the soft sobs that came through the door for a few moments before her own tears started falling.

Chapter 20 - Silent Question

Kris retreated to her room as tears filled her eyes. She quickly folded herself up on her bed, clutching a pillow in her arms as grief overtook her. She gladly let the tears fall down her face as she felt sorry for herself. “What am I going to do?” she managed to wail a few times in between crying fits. She shut her eyes and took a few deep breaths, trying to pull herself back together. As she sat up, she still felt the dampness on her cheeks. A glance at her laptop told her that she needed someone to talk to, and only one person really understood.

As her laptop booted up, Kris got a few tissues from the bathroom to dry her eyes. She shuddered at the sight of herself, with her hair all disarrayed and her eyes red from crying. She also felt a little rundown, wondering if the pressure was just getting to her. She quickly ran a brush through her hair for a few seconds to try to make it look a little neat, but in the end, just clipped it back to keep it out of her eyes. As she settled back on her bed, she saw her network connection click on and her AOL list pop up. She let out a sigh of relief when she saw Court’s name appear.

“Hey you,” Kris penned. “At home I hope?”

“Hey back,” Court quickly answered. “And yup, until I go to work later. What are you up to?”

“Having a mild to severe crisis,” Kris typed, still feeling tears threaten every once in a while.

“OMG, are you okay?” Court asked quickly. “What’s going on?”

“Can we talk on the phone?” Kris replied. “I think there is too much to talk about here.”

“Would you feel better if I just came over to talk?” Court asked.

Kris thought for a moment before answering. It was likely Mary was going to either stay in her room most of the day or go out. “Yes, I’d like that a lot,” Kris typed, feeling glad that Court had offered.

“Okay, just send me directions and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

Kris quickly typed the directions up. It really was pretty easy, and for not the first time, she was glad Court lived so close. After a brief goodbye, Kris started picking up her room, trying to make it at least look clean. She also checked the common room and kitchen. She wanted to make a good impression on Court, and felt her nervousness start to build as she waited. Kris happily sank into the couch after a half hour of running around cleaning and turned on the TV, doing her best not to look at Mary’s door.

The knock scared Kris when she heard the soft taps. Kris all but leaped up to go to the door, feeling her heart speed up a little bit and feeling a bit flushed. She looked down and realized that she never got changed, or did anything with her hair. She shook her head at her stupidity as she slowly opened the door. She saw a smile light up Court’s face as their eyes met, and soon the two were holding each other in a hug, Court asking quietly what was wrong. Kris stepped back and smiled, feeling the tension in her ease a little just from the hug. Court wore a pair of well-worn jeans and a white tee, with a pair of black slip on shoes. Kris smiled when she realized that Court had gotten ready in a hurry.

“Can we talk in my room?” Kris asked, glancing at Mary’s door before she could stop herself.

Court just nodded as Kris ushered her into the room and closed the door, feeling relieved that she couldn’t see Mary’s door any longer. Court held her for a few seconds, and Kris was tempted to just lose herself there for the rest of the night. Feeling Court’s slight nudges, Kris let herself be guided to the bed, where the two of them sat down, reluctant to let go of each other. Kris blushed for a second as she looked at Court on her bed, and quickly cast her eyes down to try to hide it. She guessed she didn’t do it quick enough when she looked back up and saw Court grinning. Court reached over and took her hand, and gently rubbed the skin as a way to say that she was there.

“So what happened?” Court asked empathetically.

Kris sighed before she began, feeling the tears threaten again. “Well, the other night after I left you, I came home and felt a bit drunk. I went to bed, and woke up… wet,” Kris said, her voice getting softer and softer until she all but whispered ‘wet.’ “I don’t know what caused it. I guess it must have been the alcohol or something like that, or it really was just an accident.”

“Or it could be you telling yourself something. The mind is a powerful thing sometimes.” Court said.

“Maybe, but I hope not. I like wearing diapers, but not sure I want to be stuck wearing them every night,” Kris said as Court nodded. “Well, anyway, I turned on my light to start cleaning myself up, and the next thing I know, Mary was opening my door asking if I was alright. She must have seen my light come on or something. So, I kind of slammed the door in her face by accident.”

“Oh stars,” Court said. “I’m sure it must have been a shock to both of you.”

“That’s an understatement. I didn’t even think about it when I did it. I just couldn’t let Mary see me standing in wet panties. As it turns out, it didn’t matter.”

“What do you mean?” Court asked.

“She knew I had been wearing diapers. Or at least that I had them, I’m not really sure.”

“Did she make fun of you about them or something like that?” Court asked.

“Actually, no she didn’t. She actually felt that I was being very adult by wearing them,” Kris answered.

“Why did she?” Court began to ask but cut off the question as Kris continued.

“Because she thought I was a bed wetter. And the sight of me doing my laundry this morning, including my comforter and sheets, was probably the last bit of evidence she needed.”

“What did you end up telling her about your diapers?” Court asked.

“Nothing, really. Mary did most of the talking,” Kris answered. “I just couldn’t tell her that I like to wear them. I felt like I was being stupid, but it was how I felt. I mean, she already dealt with me possibly being in a lesbian relationship this week!” Kris said while Court grinned at the mention of a relationship. “What I think is messed up, is that while she was wonderful about you, I still don’t feel like I can trust her with this secret.”

“Well, I don’t think it’s messed up. I think it comes down to the same issue as I said earlier. You feel embarrassed about them, which is understandable,” Court offered.

“I guess. But either way, Mary was really hurt by me not trusting her. She offered me a choice. I have to either be seen in diapers every night by ten, or I have to look for a new roommate when our lease is up,” Kris said, feeling her head throb a little bit as she thought about her options. “I just can’t believe that she would consider a new roommate.”

“I don’t know much about Mary, but I think she’s doing the right thing,” Court said neutrally.

“What?” Kris said, slightly embarrassed at how intensely the question came out.

“Well, your roommate, who you talk about all the time and have a great friendship with, thinks you have a problem. You haven’t done anything to correct her on that point, am I right?”

“No, I guess I haven’t.” Kris answered, feeling a little shame fill her cheeks.

“Exactly. So in a way, I think she’s trying to help you as best as she can. You said she didn’t make fun of you or anything like that, which means she’s probably okay with you wearing them. Maybe she’s trying to help YOU be okay with them,” Court said. “I think she’s being what you always said she is - a really good friend.”

“I never thought about it that way,” Kris said as she pondered the words.

“You were probably too busy thinking that Mary was trying to embarrass you. I just think she’s trying to get a problem that she sees out in the open a little bit.” Kris nodded along as Court continued. “I wouldn’t hold very much against Mary personally. In fact, I think you should give her a big hug the next time you see her. But if you want, I can give you another option.”

“Oh, what’s that?” Kris asked.

“Well, if you decide that you can’t live here under Mary’s new rule, you can move in with me,” Court said nonchalantly. Kris’s mouth just fell open on her as she gaped. Court just smiled sweetly as the words went through Kris’s head. She felt completely thrown off by the comment, and looked away feeling confused.

“Why would you do that?” Kris asked. “Especially for someone you’ve only met three times now!”

“I’m usually a good judge of character,” Court said in response. “And besides, I don’t want you to move away. I kind of like you if you haven’t noticed yet!” Court laughed for a few seconds, which brought a smile to Kris’s lips.

“You’re amazing,” Kris whispered softly, losing herself as she looked across at Court. “You’re just so confident and intelligent. And not to mention, a good kisser. You really are incredible.” Kris smiled as she said the words, feeling the truth of them pull at her. She felt her heart opening more and more to Court the more time they spent together, and she couldn’t believe that such a wonderful person was interested in her.

“Thank you,” Court said while grinning. “You’re pretty good yourself by the way!”

The two women fell into a conversation, talking about their lives, each trying to learn as much as possible about the other. Eventually, the conversation melted into the two holding each other and cuddling, with kisses being freely exchanged. Kris felt her skin tingle every time Court touched her, and jumped a few times when Court decided that she needed tickling. The sun began to dip in the horizon slowly though, with long shadows starting to cover the floor.

“I have to get going unfortunately,” Court said, still gripping Kris in her arms. “But I really don’t want to let you go.”

“I don’t want you to either,” Kris answered truthfully, thankful to have Court’s arms around her. “But I guess you have to, huh?”

“I do,” Court answered with a sigh. “Think about what I said angel, and just let me know. You’re welcome in my home tonight if you want, as far as I’m concerned.” Court kissed the tips of her fingers and lightly pressed them against Kris’s neck, making her hair stand on end and a chill go down her spine. She closed her eyes as Court’s fingers traced her body.

“Thank you so much,” Kris answered. “I have a little bit to think about.”

“Yeah, you do,” Court answered sympathetically, “but I think you’ll do the right thing.”

“And what’s that?” Kris asked.

In answer, Court kissed Kris’s lips lightly as she closed her eyes, and quietly slipped out of the door. Kris stood there for a few moments, feeling the kiss still on her lips. She opened her eyes and saw the time, happy to see that she still had a few hours to think things over. Her tummy rumbled a little bit, and Kris made a quick trip to the kitchen, only staying long enough to heat up a little soup and to make a sandwich. She settled on her bed, feeling the weight of both Court and Mary’s words. She ate quickly and set the tray on her nigh

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 21 - Vulnerable

Mary stood up when she heard the door to Kris’s room slowly open, the sound of the door dragging on the carpet echoing through the quiet room. She turned slowly, and tears formed in her eyes at the sight of Kris. She saw matching tears glistening Kris’s cheeks, giving her eyes a beautiful look, making them look like deep pools. After a moment, the two were dashing across the room to each other, embracing in a hug with Kris whispering soft apologies and promises to never be so silly again.

Mary felt the diaper Kris was wearing press against her as the two held each other, thankful beyond words that Kris had chosen to remain her friend. The tears were fully pouring out her eyes now, her arms trying to give Kris silent assurances that everything was okay. Mary saw that Kris wore a plain, white diaper, with a deep red, silken pajama top that just reached the top of her diaper. Her hands traveled down for a moment and she lightly felt Kris’s diaper, the soft crinkle bringing a smile to her face. Kris stepped back, shocked for a second, her face reddening.

“Oh, I’m sorry Kris, I didn’t mean anything by touching it. I was just so happy that you decided this way,” Mary said simply.

Kris’s blush still deepened though. “It’s okay, there is nothing wrong with how you are dressed. Your hair looks like a mess though!” Mary said.

Kris broke out laughing, and Mary was about to ask what that was about when a slow shake of Kris’s head told her it was a private joke. “I’m embarrassed more then I can tell you Mary,” Kris said as the laughter subsided. “I’m a grown woman, prancing around in a diaper in front of my roommate, my presence being heard every time I move!” As if to score the point, Kris shifted her weight which caused a faint crinkle to flow from her diaper.

Mary just smiled at her. “I know baby, but it’ll get better, I promise. I’m not going to make any judgments about you because of this, and I hope you can trust that I don’t see this as a big deal.”

“I do, Mary,” Kris said, “but it’s still embarrassing!”

“Well, that’ll certainly get better. You took the hardest steps, and I’m proud of you,” Mary said.

Kris blushed, wondering how someone could be proud of someone in a diaper. “Thanks, I guess.”

In answer, Mary just patted the back of Kris’s diaper, which shocked Kris, but she couldn’t quite manage to say anything. Mary was dressed in an almost professional manner, a sleek, button-down blouse of light green silk with a pair of black pants that hugged her hips. Every inch of her radiated confidence, and every inch of Kris seemed to radiate shame. She looked up to try to say something about the diaper pat, but the words just wouldn’t form. She kept thinking of how silly she would be if she said them to Mary. She decided to be an adult about wearing diapers, and chose to ignore the pat. Nevertheless, she couldn’t quite stop her cheeks from reddening.

The two went over and sat down on the couch, Mary sitting down gracefully, while Kris felt silly as she sat as softly as she could, trying to stop her diaper from making too much noise. Mary gently took Kris’s hand as they sat, and gave an encouraging smile to Kris. “I’m so happy about this Kris,” Mary said. “You have no idea.”

“Why is that, Mary?” she asked, feeling a bit confused.

“Because I really didn’t want to get another roommate, or lose a friend. And you showed how much our friendship means to you,” Mary said. “And because I’m seeing a side of you that I’ve never seen before,” Mary added silently to herself, “and who knows what that means. Jay is going to love this.”

For her part, Kris just smiled over at Mary, and happily started watching TV, hoping to quietly end the talk about her diaper. Every movement brought the subject up again though, at least in her mind. Soon, she was sitting as still as possible, feeling her muscles ache a little from lack of movement. Mary watched her silently the whole time, and smiled to herself on occasion.

“You know,” Mary opened, “I know you’re wearing a diaper.” Kris’s face blushed slightly, still not used to being so exposed. “There’s no point to making yourself crazy.” Mary said it so matter of factly that Kris almost laughed. She certainly wasn’t the one wearing a diaper in the middle of the apartment! She felt herself relax a little though with Mary’s reassurance, and was soon happily lounging about, the diaper swish seeming to become quieter and quieter.

After a little bit, Mary stood up and announced that she wanted a snack, and if Kris would like anything. Kris nodded absently. This was a pretty common routine, the before bed binge the two would often take if either had a rough day. Mary rummaged through the kitchen and decided on milk and cookies tonight. She quickly took the milk out of the fridge and picked out two glasses. As she was filling the first one, a thought came to her. Instead of filling the second glass, she replaced it and took out a regular plastic cup, and quickly filled it with milk. “I wonder how she’ll react,” Mary thought to herself. She opened the cupboard and picked out Vienna Fingers, one of Kris’s favorite cookies. She folded a few up in a paper towel and grabbed the plastic cup, and lightly stepped over to the couch.

“Here are your cookies Miss,” Mary said, handling the bundle to Kris. Kris only paid it half a mind, seeming to be intent on watching the TV.

“Thanks Mary,” she replied. Mary walked back over and grabbed a few cookies for herself along with the glass of milk. After sitting back down, she happily began eating her cookies, while keeping a semi-close eye on Kris. At one point, she saw Kris’s eyebrows draw together as she looked at the cup, and Mary noticed her looking at her glass. She looked like she was on the verge of saying something, but quietly seemed to back down, her eyes falling to her diapered bottom. Mary just nodded to herself, confirming something in her mind. She settled in to watch the TV, but her mind was coursing in other directions for the time being.

Kris sat up a little later and announced that it was her bedtime. Mary stood up and the two women hugged again, this time with Kris trying to keep her diapered lower half away from Mary. Mary sat back down and watched as Kris’s diapered bottom waddled across the room. She knew she shouldn’t have thought of Kris as waddling. It was hard to keep the image out though, with Kris’s bare diaper continually in view. Mary pondered the experiment with the cups. “I’ve never seen her so vulnerable,” Mary thought to herself. “She’s always so confident and sure of herself. I wonder if this is the chink in the armor?” Mary had always thought Kris was almost too independent, to the point where she rarely trusted anyone enough to really open herself up to them.

Mary walked to the kitchen and filled a glass with a soft port wine. She sat on the couch with a book on her lap and the glass resting on the floor. She kept thinking things over in her mind again and again, barely even noticing when she’d take a sip of the wine. Mary was sure she had seen a streak in Kris through her actions tonight. She nodded to herself as though making a decision, and pulled out her cell from her purse that was resting on the edge of the couch. She punched in a few digits, and grinned when she heard a sleepy male voice answer.

“Hey you, just wanted to let you know that you may have a sister soon.” Mary said.

“What?” the voice asked. “Really?”

“I think so, but we’ll talk about it more when you’re a bit more awake.” Mary replied. “Good night,” she said as she closed the phone.

Mary smiled to herself. “Let’s find out what you really want, Kris,” she whispered.

Chapter 22 - The Real World

Kris woke up at her usual time, and groggily switched off her alarm clock. She slept so deeply during the night that it took a few seconds for her to ‘turn on’. She blinked a few times, trying to focus her eyes, when a slight movement caused a faint crinkling to wake her up immediately. The events of last night came crashing back to her as her cheeks reddened from the memories. “Better then coffee for waking up,” she mumbled to herself as she stood up, her diaper making noise with every movement. She was happy to see it was dry though. Even though she knew her wetting the bed the other night was just an accident, she couldn’t stop that little twinge of doubt from forming in her mind.

She quickly jumped in the shower after removing her diaper, and enjoyed the warm water that slid down her body. Showers were always Kris’s haven, the place where all the worries of the world where put aside, as she focused on herself and being one with her body. She relished the feeling as she tilted her head back, letting the water cascade through her hair. As she turned the handles to turn off the water with a little reluctance, she grabbed a towel from the rack and dried herself off. After a quick sprinkle of baby powder over her middle, and a few other things to get herself ready for the day, Kris headed towards the bedroom to pick out an outfit for the day. The kids were always a little more antsy on Mondays, so she selected a comfy pair of jeans and an old top, one that she didn’t mind getting stained if need be.

The rest of the morning was a blur to her, as thoughts of last night kept intruding on her. She pushed the issues to the side though as the kids began arriving, fresh off a weekend of rest and ready to tear apart the playroom with their friends. Kris was almost tempted to drug their lunches after a few particularly bad outbursts, the main one being a small block throwing game that two boys came up with. After a band aid or two were given out, the boys weren’t happy to be in the corner for a time out. She breathed a sigh of relief when the kids actually settled down for nap time, giving her a few quiet moments to recover. She sat next to Helen as usual, glad for her always calm presence.

“Been a good day, hasn’t it?” Helen opened.

“That’s an understatement. What to their parents do on the weekends, feed them pixi stix all day long?” Kris said with a smile.

“I think so. They want to know they’re getting their money’s worth,” Helen replied. “So how was your weekend?”

Kris did a quick check to see if Sam was around anywhere. She couldn’t see him, which made her feel relieved for some reason. “It was pretty good. I saw Court again, and I think we’re both feeling a good connection.”

“That’s great,” Helen answered. “So what’s he like?”

Kris felt her face flush a little. “Well, the truth is Helen, I didn’t tell you the whole story last week. You were right about internet dating, you never know who or what you’ll find.”

Helen turned her head from the kids and turned to Kris, her eyes dancing with curiosity. “What do you mean?”

“Well, some people find freaky men, or pedophiles, or something like that,” Kris began. “I found a lesbian.” Kris whispered the last bit, trying to make sure none of the kids overheard.

Helen’s mouth hung open for a moment as she took in the words. “Oh my God,” was all she managed to utter.

“I’m sorry for shocking you Helen, I really didn’t mean to. I just didn’t want to keep lying to you. Or at least leaving out the whole truth,” Kris opened. “I hope you’re not mad at me.”

“Oh honey, I’m not mad at you. Just a little surprised. You don’t hear this everyday!” Helen replied. “But it won’t change my opinion of you or anything like that. I know a few other lesbians, and I think they’re wonderful people, and that’s all that matters in the end. You’re still you.”

Kris felt a few tears in her eyes form. “Thank you so much Helen.”

“What, for being human? I don’t like judging people by what label you attach to them. But I wouldn’t recommend you tell anyone else for right now, especially Mrs. Bently. I’m not sure how she’d react to it, or if she’d want you here after finding out. It may be too dangerous that one of the parents would find out and cause a problem,” Helen said seriously.

“Oh, I agree with that. I just wanted to tell you since you’re a friend, and I trust you,” Kris said. “Even with that though, it was hard to say the ‘L’ word!”

“I can imagine. But don’t give it half a mind, and I still want to hear all about Court,” Helen said with a grin.

Kris happily started filling in details about Court, short of one at least. Helen nodded along enthusiastically, and every once in a while asked a question to get a few more details. Pretty soon though, the sleeping children were waking up, and Kris wearily climbed to her feet to begin the afternoon play session. Jessica bounded up to her at one point and gave her hug.

“Hey little lady, hope you had a good weekend,” Kris said with a smile.

“I did! We all went to the movies and I had so much fun! What did you do? Why do you look so tired? Did you go anywhere?” Jessica asked in that sometimes blunt way that young girls ask questions.

Kris just smiled at her for second. “Well, I’ll tell you about it later,” Kris opened. “Like in fifteen years,” she thought silently to herself. “For now though, I have something you can do for me.”

Jessica’s eyes lit up at the chance to help with something. “What?” she asked enthusiastically.

“Go over and give your mom a hug, and tell her it’s from me, k?” Kris said with a grin.

Jessica just smiled up at her as she bounded off, looking for Helen. Kris breathed a sigh of relief, glad to have dodged Jessica’s questions. She settled back into her usual routine, and lost herself in taking care of the kids. Pretty soon it was snack time again, and as usual, Kris headed to the small kitchen to start getting them ready. She used the counter facing the door today, a habit she picked up after last week. She filled a few glasses with milk, and selected some mini-bags of cookies to give out to the kids. As she started to leave, she saw Sam’s figure blocking the doorway.

“Hey Sam, how was your weekend?” Kris asked with a smile, trying to hide the slight nervousness she felt.

“It was pretty good,” Sam said with a smile. “I went out with some friends and had a good time.”

“That’s good to hear,” Kris said, inching a little closer to the door hoping Sam would take the hint and let her out of the room.

Sam turned himself in the doorway with his arms crossed to give her some room, smiling the whole time from ear to ear. “I guess you want to get back to work, huh?”

“Yeah, that would be good. The kids have been wild today!” Kris said with a laugh, hoping to relax herself. She moved towards the door, hoping Sam would leave before her. Seeing that he wasn’t budging, Kris turned her back to him and started to slide past him back into the hallway.

Kris felt something touch her inner thighs and move up, her eyes going wide at the touch. “I over heard part of your talk with Helen this morning,” an icy voice said to her. “I guess you’re not planning on telling Mrs. Bently, and probably hoping no one will tell her. But don’t worry, it’ll be out little secret, if you don’t upset me at least.” Kris felt his hand lightly brush the middle of her legs as she darted past him into the hallway, turning around to stare for a moment. Sam stood there with a self satisfied grin, and Kris moved to slap him when the words settled on her. She stepped back on unsure legs, feeling as if she was about to collapse. He was staring at her, waiting for her reaction.

“I… I have to get the kids,” she muttered, turning around quickly and fleeing down the hall in quick steps. She stepped into the ladies room and slammed the door behind her, feeling her muscles sag against the door, feeling safe finally. She slowly fell to the floor as she began crying uncontrollably, still feeling his hand against her. She held her head in her hands as she shook it, trying to figure out what happened. Anger, despair, shame, and even guilt kept rushing through her as she folded up into herself. She gripped her body, trying to hold off the feelings, trying to figure out what to do.

Helen’s voice calling for her brought her out of her crying fit slowly, as she tried to clean herself up so she wouldn’t suspect anything. “I’ll be right out Helen,” Kris called. She dried her eyes with a little toilet paper and gently smoothed out her clothes, wincing every time she thought of his hands on her. She opened the door and saw Helen leaning against the wall besides the door. “I’m sorry Helen, I just wasn’t feeling well for a second,” Kris explained, smiled to her.

Helen gave her one look up and down and ushered her back into the ladies room and closed the door. “Bullshit, your eyes look like you’ve been crying for days. What happened?” she said in a voice that Kris new brokered no nonsense.

“Can we talk about it later, please? The kids are waiting,” Kris said in a shaky voice.

“No, we can’t,” Helen said. “What happened?”

Kris covered her eyes with her hand, trying to stop Helen from seeing her like this. “Sam touched me,” she spoke softly, feeling herself start to pull apart.

Helens eyes became furious for a moment and looked past her. Kris figured she was trying to decide between staying and comforting her and going after Sam. In the end, Kris reached out and Helen took her in her arms. Kris rested her head on Helen’s shoulders, glad for the support as she tried to collect herself again. After a few moments, Kris picked herself back up, closed her eyes for a second, and willed herself to be calm.

“I’m going to go kick his ass I think,” Helen said, in a too calm way that made Kris shiver, hoping to never hear herself on the receiving end of it.

“No, please don’t say anything,” Kris pleaded.

“Why not?” Helen asked, still sounding annoyed.

“Because…,” Kris began. “He heard us earlier Helen. He threatened to go to Ms. Bently if I did anything. Well, he didn’t say that, but it’s what he meant. I’ve only been here a short time, and I doubt it would take much for her to just fire me rather then worry about what might happen.”

“Well, I for one think you should do something. They can’t fire you for reporting this, it’s against the law,” Helen replied.

“That’s true, but she could easily say it’s for the other reason, and I wouldn’t have much proof to the contrary. Either way, this isn’t a major corporation or anything, so I doubt anyone would care,” Kris answered, feeling hopeless.

“Well, we’ll figure something out sweetie,” Helen said. “Are you okay to work the rest of the day or do you want to leave?”

“I can’t leave you with the little monsters the way they’ve been today. And even if I don’t do anything, I won’t run away from him. Not again at least,” Kris said, the anger slowly bubbling up. “But don’t worry, I’ll be okay.” Kris did her best to put on a brave face as she opened the door.

The rest of the day dragged on for Kris, as she did her best to always be around at least one of the kids, hoping that would keep Sam away from her. Sam for his part acted as if nothing had happened, and even smiled when he saw Kris staring at him. Helen would giver her reassuring pats every once in a while, but for the most part, Kris was happy to just keep to herself. “I guess at least I wasn’t wearing a diaper,” she chuckled to herself. “Though, then he wouldn’t have really be able to touch me as closely.” Kris shook her head at the odd thought, and went about picking up the playroom.

As the kids slowly left as they were picked up, Helen started to hang around Kris. Kris was thankful that she had such a good friend watching out for her. Helen at some point had also gotten Kris’s coat and pocketbook from the storeroom, and handed them to Kris, silently nodding for her to leave if she wanted. Kris gave her a quick hug and vanished through the door, glad to be out of there. She broke down crying in her car, but the biggest grief came as she looked at the school. For the first time, she wasn’t happy looking at it. She thought about what Sam had taken from her, but the helplessness came over her again as she began the drive home, wondering what she should do.

Chapter 23 - Choices

Kris drove quickly home, doing her best to forget what had happened earlier in the day. Kris eventually reasoned that it was at least partly her fault, and she’d have a talk with Sam about it tomorrow and everything would be okay. Sam wasn’t a bad guy usually, it was just a misunderstanding she thought. The drive home flew by, and Kris felt relieved when she closed the door to her apartment, feeling a little safer.

After a quick check to see if Mary was home, Kris walked to her bedroom and collapsed on top of her bed, glad to be able to finally rest for a few minutes. She thought she could still smell a faint trace of baby powder in her room, which immediately relaxed her. Even the headache she felt forming felt a little better. Eventually, she dragged herself up to a sitting position, thinking about the lousy day she had. She slid off the bed to a kneeling position on the floor, and gently fumbled underneath her bed until she pulled out a fresh diaper. She looked at the clock briefly, seeing that it was only six o’clock. She eyed the diaper thoughtfully for a few moments, wondering what to do. “Well, Mary did say I should get used to them, right?” she said to herself. “Not that she’s home anyway.”

Kris quickly unfolded the diaper and laid it on her bed, and removed her diapering supplies. She stripped off her clothes, and soon stood in the center of the room in the nude, taking in her body in the mirror. She shuddered slightly when her thoughts drifted to how Sam had touched her, and she quickly covered herself with her hands, as if trying to block the memory. She took a deep breath to calm down, and slowly took her hands away, looking at the dark patch between her legs. Something just seemed wrong about it to Kris for some reason. Almost as if it was out of place. She walked into the bathroom and began running a bath, breathing in the faint scents that came from her regular bath salts. She felt a little foolish as she clipped away a little of her hair with a pair of small scissors, still not quite sure why she was doing it. After a few minutes, she stopped and looked at her trimmed self, nodding to herself that it looked better this way.

She laid down in the tub and felt her legs which were a little rough. She lathered her left leg quickly and dipped her razor in the warm water. As she gently shaved her legs, her eyes kept drifting back to her middle, wondering what was bothering her so much about it tonight. “I’m thinking too much about the slime ball,” she muttered to herself as she tried to focus on her legs. After she switched to her other leg, she let her thoughts wander again, and was brought back by a small stab of pain and a small spot on her leg. She berated herself for being so addle brained, and quickly washed away the angry red spot.

Kris rested against the back of the tub and placed a small towel under her neck for support. She closed her eyes for a few moments, the soft sounds of the water occasionally splashing soothing her body. She thought about what she was feeling, and couldn’t understand why she felt these needs. Court seemed happy with herself certainly, but Kris didn’t think she could accept that she had these needs also. They still seemed so…. odd. Not that she could explain why, but it just was. She couldn’t stop her thoughts from going back again and again to the wrongness of looking at herself though.

“Okay,” she said out loud to the empty bathroom. “I just want to see what it feels like. It doesn’t mean anything, right? A lot of women do this.”

She sat up and lifted herself out of the water, and gently lathered between her legs. She jumped a little as she drew the razor slowly across, watching as the hair slowly vanished. She felt the areas that were finished, amazed at the smoothness that was there. She relaxed more and more the farther she went, and sat back against the tub with a sigh when she finished. The water slowly settled to a calm, and Kris looked down, feeling strangely content with the sight that greeted her. She looked like a young child with her hairlessness, and felt an innocence wash over her. Even thoughts of Sam didn’t bother the feeling. After all, she was too little to have him touch her, right? She crossed her legs, taking in every sensation as soft skin met soft skin for the first time in ages, giving Kris a giddy feeling and a sense of rightness.

Kris emptied the water from the tub and quickly ran the shower, washing away any stray hairs that may have clung to her. She took her time and cleaned her diaper area, trying to make sure there were no cuts that weren’t taken care of. As she stepped out the shower, she took in the complete sight of herself in the mirror, amazed at the image. She smiled to herself, glad she had decided to do this. The only thing that troubled her was the little twinge of worry she had about the why of everything. She closed her eyes for a moment, telling herself that she was being silly and it was no big deal to have a hairless vagina.

She returned to her room and quietly diapered herself. She rubbed a little moisturizer into her skin, hoping it would hold off any irritation later on, and relished the coolness that came with a sprinkle of her baby powder. She drew the diaper up and jumped slightly as the middle touched her, amazed at how sensitive everything was. She calmed herself down and finished taping up her diaper, still trying to take in everything, and wondering why it all felt so wonderful to her. She selected a different pj top tonight, a longer silken top of deep blue that belonged to one of her ex boyfriends originally. The top was a bit long on her, just covering her diaper. She had to constantly push up the sleeves so her hands could get at things, but she didn’t mind. It always comforted her to wear it, even though it fit in the loosest of terms.

She walked out into the common room, and saw that Mary still hadn’t come in yet. She walked to the kitchen, and after rummaging through the fridge and cabinets, started making a grilled cheese for dinner. She put a CD in her laptop and started playing some music. Pretty soon, she was dancing about the kitchen and singing as she made her dinner, and every once in a while, stopped to laugh at herself. She sat down at the table with her plate and folded her legs underneath her as placed a blanket over her legs to keep them warm, happy to sit for a few minutes. She started eating absentmindedly as she thumbed through one of her books that was resting on the table. As her sandwich slowly disappeared, she smiled to herself, amazed at how at peace she was. Wearing a diaper just felt right to her, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. She only wished that feeling extended to when other people were around.

As if on queue, Kris heard the door knob turn. Her face blossomed into a faint pink color, which quickly disappeared. It had to be Mary, she thought, and she’s the one who wanted this, right? Mary walked in carrying a few bags, mostly from department stores from what Kris could see. Kris smiled and unfolded her legs so she could go help with the bags, when the sight of a second person entering froze her. Kris saw it was one of Mary’s coworkers, one that Kris had seen once or twice before. She felt her temperature rise, sure that both of them must be able to feel the heat that was radiating from her. She quietly settled herself into the chair, pulling down the pj top to make sure her middle was covered as she folded up her legs again. That the friend was a guy definitely wasn’t helping matters. She pulled the blanket up a little, treating it for all the world as though it was her only protection.

“Hey Kris, how are you today?” Mary asked as she set the packages on the floor.

“I’m doing okay. Kind of a rough day, but it happens,” Kris said with a shrug, trying to sound calm.

Mary eyed her suspiciously for a few seconds. Recognition slowly crept across her face, as she saw her roommate sitting as still as possible in a long night shirt. Kris wasn’t sure, but she could have sworn that wonderment replaced surprise after a couple of seconds. Mary though, true to her nature, didn’t miss a step. “Oh, what happened?” Mary asked, giving a quick look at Kris’s lower body as a way of saying that she knew what was going on.

Kris wasn’t sure if Mary’s question was about her day or about why she was wearing a diaper at seven thirty in the evening. Kris looked at Mary’s friend and prayed she was talking about Kris’s day. “Just a jerk at work that seemed to think he has the right to touch me if he wants.” Kris shrugged her shoulders, trying not to let the feelings come back to her. She lightly touched the outside of her diaper for a second, making sure it was still there keeping her safe.

“You’re kidding me,” Mary said incredulously. “What did you do to the slime ball?”

“Well, nothing. I can’t really, I’m too new,” Kris opened, realizing too late about how much that sounded like an excuse.

“That doesn’t matter. He can’t do that kind of thing to you. You should really go to your boss,” Mary said. “I had a coworker fired when I was still a teenager for that kind of stuff. And of course I had to go through the usual accusations,” Mary said.

“Like what?” Kris asked.

“Oh, the usual. Was I flirting with him, was I dressing too provocatively, why didn’t I go to management earlier, yadda, yadda,” Mary replied. “They were all stupid questions, just to cover themselves.”

“I think that’s why I’m just going to deal with this,” Kris said. She turned towards Mary’s coworker, hoping that would change the subject. “Hi there, Matt,” Kris said, the name coming at the last moment. “I’m really sorry for how I’m dressed, I didn’t expect company.”

“Hi Kris,” Matt answered in a fairly deep voice, “it’s okay, we should have called ahead I guess.” He was a bit older then Kris or Mary from what she could see, guessing his age to be somewhere in the late twenties. He was certainly handsome, with a pair of dark brown eyes and matching hair. He kept a neatly trimmed goatee on his face, which just gave him a touch of that ‘rugged’ look that could melt you at times. The rugged image wasn’t even dented by the pair of dockers he wore with a plain polo shirt. Kris had also shaken hands with him at one point, and she still remembered the calloused hands that spoke of someone used to working with his hands. Kris blushed as she thought about his hands, wondering what else they may be good for.

“Apparently not,” Mary said breaking Kris’s revelry, as her face heated. “I think you should do something Kris, even though you don’t want to. But that’s just my opinion, and I don’t want to see anything else happen.”

Kris looked up and met Mary’s eyes. “Thank you, Mary, that means a lot to me. I’ll deal though, and don’t plan on going anywhere near him for a long time.”

“That’s good. I’m sorry about Matt coming over, we were just going to hang out and watch TV,” Mary said. “Would you like to join us?”

Kris looked up, not sure if Mary was being nice, trying to act normal, or maybe even testing her. She just shook her head. “No thanks, I think I’m just going to keep reading here if that’s okay.” Kris didn’t want to risk moving, knowing that the crinkling of her diaper would definitely give her away. She thought about what Mary, Ellen, and Court had said about not being ashamed, and blushed slightly. But she couldn’t face this right now, not after the day she’d had.

“I bet you are,” Mary said with a bit of mirth in her voice. “Well, if you want, we’ll be here later if you want to join us. We may make ice cream sundaes tonight!”

“That sounds good!” Kris said perking up. She loved ice cream, especially with warm hot fudge on top. She had hoped Mary would invite Matt to her room or something like that to give Kris a chance to leave the room, but that didn’t seem to be happening. The two made small talk while Mary put her packages away and changed into something a bit more comfortable, Kris all the while hearing every sound her diaper made. Pretty soon, Mary was back in a pair of jeans and a warm sweater. The two settled on the couch to watch TV as Kris dove into her book, trying to escape the situation she was in.

Kris phased out as she focused on her book, and absently accepted occasional refills of her soda from Mary, silently answering with nods, hoping Matt would forget she was there. She saw Mary glance at her a few times, and wondered what her roommate was thinking. Mary did come up once and silently asked Kris if she wanted Matt to leave, which Kris just shook her head no, not wanting her diaper wearing to inconvenience her roommate.

The minutes and hours seemed to drift by, and Kris was sure she had heard at least one movie start and end. She did her best to keep her movements to a minimal, shifting herself slowly when she had to, sure that every sound was reaching Matt’s ears. Something more then aching muscles had her fidgeting a little later on though. As she watched the clock in the kitchen slowly turn, as the minutes passed by, the need to wet slowly grew. She looked at Mary and Matt, both content on the couch and didn’t look to be going anywhere soon.

And it didn’t look like Kris was going to be going anywhere anytime soon either.

Chapter 24 - Acceptance

Kris kept herself from fidgeting too much as she watched the pair on the couch, praying that Matt would have the manners to leave at a reasonable time. It was nearing eleven o’clock, much to Kris’s annoyance. He’d stayed over till twelve one other time, and Kris hadn’t said anything then which left her in a poor position. She knew Mary would recognize any attempt to get him to leave, so Kris silently suffered, doing her best to keep her aching bladder comfortable. She found herself rocking back and forth after a while, not even the sounds of the diaper really worrying her.

Her legs started to get tired of squeezing, and Kris knew that she had to do something. She started to panic a little as the need kept growing, consuming her thoughts as she shook back and forth trying to stave off the pressure. A little trickle of warmth started to warm her middle, and Kris sat up surprised, quickly squeezing her legs and figuring that Matt must have heard it. There was no reaction from him at all, and Kris breathed a sigh of relief that her diaper was still a secret. She felt underneath the blanket and quietly stuck a finger inside her diaper, not feeling surprised that a little answering wetness was found.

“A little more wouldn’t hurt, would it,” Kris thought silently to herself. “I barely wet at all and feel a little better, so a little more wetting shouldn’t hurt, right?”

Kris sat still for the first time in what seemed like hours and carefully released the hold she had on her legs. She willed herself to relax, and soon felt an answering wetness that began filling the back of her diaper. She breathed a deep sigh of relief and closed her eyes for a second, relishing the feeling of the warmness. With regret, she squeezed back down and cut off the stream, not wanting a completely soaked diaper, or any accompanying leaks.

When Kris looked back up, she saw Mary looking at her from the far side of the room. She just seemed to be taking in the sight of Kris, almost as if she was appraising her. Matt glanced over at her for a second and then Mary before turning back to the TV. A few minutes later, Matt was standing up and pulling on his coat, saying that he had to get some sleep before tomorrow.

“Good night Matt,” Kris said in a low voice, feeling a little bit upset that he couldn’t have left ten minutes earlier. “Have a safe drive, and hope you can come over again sometime soon.”

“I will Kris, I’m sure,” Matt replied. “Oh, and I’m sorry if I embarrassed you tonight, but there really is nothing to be ashamed about. I wouldn’t have cared.” Kris felt her mouth drop open in shock as she watch Matt and Mary embrace in a quick hug before he vanished through the door. Mary clicked the deadbolt in place behind him and turned to face Kris, who was busy turning a deep crimson color.

“You told him?” Kris asked, anger beginning to replace embarrassment. “Why?”

“I didn’t tell him a thing about you wearing a diaper tonight if that’s what you’re implying,” Mary said. “Maybe the way you huddled in a chair all night and barely moved that told him. Or the fidgeting. I’m not really sure.”

“I can’t believe this,” Kris said as tears started to fall. “Why did he have to find out?”

“Well, in case you weren’t listening, he didn’t think anything of it,” Mary opened.

“I guess I’m going to go to bed,” Kris said, trying to form some semblance of dignity.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” Mary asked.

“What?” Kris asked.

“Well, the rule was that I was allowed to make sure you had a diaper on before bed,” Mary replied.

Kris blushed, and felt a sudden chill as she noticed the dampness of her diaper. “But, you know I’m wearing one Mary,” she said, trying to think of some excuse.

“I know, but the goal of this was to get you to be okay with wearing diapers, and everything that I saw tonight said that we have a lot of work to do,” Mary said calmly. “If you hadn’t been so ashamed tonight, or acting a little childish, this wouldn’t be happening. And as you already saw, it wouldn’t have been a big deal if you had just been proud of yourself.”

Kris blushed deeply, feeling a little upset by Mary’s words. The worst part was that she agreed at least in part with Mary. She had caused this situation. She looked up feeling suddenly vulnerable, looking over to where Mary now sat on the couch. “Please Mary?” she whispered.

Mary looked sad for a second, but shook her head slightly. “No Kris, this is the house rule you agreed to, and I believe in following the rules as you well know.”

Kris looked down for a moment before standing up. She wished Mary would just let her go. Not just because of not wanting her wet diaper seen, but also because the small relief she got from wetting a little earlier was quickly disappearing. She moved slowly, squeezing her legs trying to make sure that no more escaped her, hoping that Mary wouldn’t be able to tell her diaper was a little wet. Mary watched the whole time as Kris walked over slowly until she stood in front of her.

“Turn around please?” Mary asked softly as she touched Kris’s hand. “It’ll be okay baby,” she whispered softly, which eased Kris a little. Kris slowly turned around, and Mary gently lifted the nightshirt, showing off Kris’s diapered tush. “Would you mind bending your knees a little, I just want to check one thing.”

Kris complied, and gently bent her knees, feeling a little bit of pressure being put on her now angry bladder. Kris gasped but didn’t move when she felt Mary gently tug on the elastic around her leg, and soon felt Mary softly sticking her finger in. Kris felt riddled with shame for a few seconds which froze her as Mary checked her diaper.

“You’re a little wet, baby,” Mary said in a soft, soothing voice. “But from how you’re moving, I think you need to wet a little more. Why don’t you? Your diaper is already wet, so what’s the difference?”

“I, I can’t Mary,” Kris said. “I just don’t want to in front of you.”

“I think you do angel,” Mary whispered, “and it’s okay. I understand, and don’t mind. Don’t worry so much about how it will look, just do what’s natural to you. Don’t be ashamed of your diaper Kris, I know it feels good to you. Please trust me.”

Kris felt all the resistance she had run out of her. She sagged for a second, feeling the weight of Mary’s words as she felt herself drift. She sniffed for a second as tears filled her eyes. Her tears were for joy though, for a happiness that she couldn’t describe. She felt herself submit completely to her feelings for the first time, feeling all the control she clung to with such ferocity vanish inside of her. She bent her knees a little more until her diapered tush was sticking out, and felt herself relax as she soaked her diaper. Mary was giving silent reassurances by gently rubbing her back as she wet, and occasionally ran her hand over the back of her diaper, feeling the warmth as it spread through her diaper. Kris took a deep sigh, thankful to have Mary supporting her, and felt completely comfortable with her seeing this. Kris smiled to herself, feeling the new level of trust that just formed between the two friends, the new possibilities and the new love that could develop.

Kris slowly stood up, feeling the wetness press against her legs as she moved, amazed that she had wet that much. She felt like she should be feeling ashamed, but the feelings just didn’t come. She just stood there, enjoying the moment for what it was. Mary stood up and placed her arms around Kris from behind, and gently cradled her in her arms.

“I’m so proud of you,” Mary spoke softly, holding Kris tightly. “I’m sorry I put you though this Kris, but I hope you think my motives were pure. And I hope you think it was worth it.”

In answer, Kris leaned her head back against Mary’s shoulder and enjoying the feeling. A feeling of complete acceptance, for all that she was. “Thank you Mary,” she whispered.

Chapter 25 - Memories

The two women settled on the couch to talk, as Kris enjoyed the feeling of the warm diaper around her. Kris was amazed to find that she really didn’t mind being in a wet diaper in front of Mary. She figured it was because being in a wet diaper wasn’t that much different then being seen in a diaper in general. The wonderful feelings that were soothing her may have helped also for all she knew. They spoke about Sam again in more depth, as Kris tried to piece together what to do.

“Well, you know what I think,” Mary opened up. “Go in tomorrow, kick him between the legs, and turn him in.”

“I can’t though Mary,” Kris said sadly. “I’d be the one to lose my job, and there aren’t any real protections for people in gay relationships here.”

“So what?” Mary said. “There are groups that would help you if you wanted.”

“But I’m not exactly out to anyone, and don’t really like the idea of my name being on a public court brief, or the papers for that matter if it turned into something,” Kris answered. “And besides, I like my job there. The pay is pretty decent relatively speaking, it’s close by, and I love the kids, even on the wild days. Well, most times at least!”

“I know, but still, something should be done. He just can’t get away with it,” Mary replied. “Have you told any of your coworkers?”

“Only my friend Helen who is the only other person with us most days. Mrs. Bently comes in occasionally, but she doesn’t usually stay long when she does,” Kris said while sighing. “And I think he can get away with it, which I think he knows.”

“Well, we’ll see,” Mary said. “It’s been a long day, and I think you probably need some rest, huh?”

“Yeah, I’d say so,” Kris answered while standing up, the crinkling under her pj top bringing her a little comfort. “Good night Mare.”

Mary shuddered for a second. “I hate it when you call me Mare,” she said while laughing. “Good night baby.”

Kris quickly changed herself once she was in her bedroom. A warm diaper helped calm her down, but a cold clammy one wasn’t very nice to feel against her sensitive skin. She happily crawled into bed, feeling all the energy drain out of her as pulled the covers over her. She couldn’t even quite get the effort up for her nightly ritual of checking her email on her laptop, or for saying good night to Court on IM when she was around.

The next thing she knew, a brilliant flash of lightning woke her, with a sharp crack of thunder following. She rolled over and looked at her clock, and realized it was nearly nine thirty in the morning. She practically leaped out of bed as she thought about what to do. She looked at her clock again and realized she hadn’t set the alarm, and shook her head for being such an idiot. She quickly dialed the daycare center, and breathed a sigh of relief when Helen picked up.

“Hey ya Helen,” Kris said, “I’m sorry I’m not there. I just got a little messed up last night.”

“That’s understandable,” Helen said with sympathy. “I wasn’t sure you’d make it in today. I already told Mrs. Bently that you had called in today.”

Kris smiled to herself, amazed that Helen would do that for her. “Thank you so much,” Kris said as she breathed a sigh of relief, “you don’t know how much I appreciate that.”

“It’s no problem hun, just remember it the next time I need a favor!” Helen replied. “Now, go get some rest, I’m sure you need it.”

“Thanks again Helen, and I’ll see you tomorrow,” Kris answered as she hung up the phone. She also walked to her alarm clock and set it for the next morning, hoping to avoid a repeat slip up.

Kris walked to the common room and took in the room. She knew both Court and Mary would be working most of the day, and the downpour outside made for an attractive pampering day. Kris stretched her arms towards the ceiling, feeling her pj top pull up over her diaper and an answering crinkle as she squeezed her legs. She smiled to herself as she relaxed her body, and giggled softly when she felt her morning wetness spread though her diaper. She lightly touched the outside of her diaper, suddenly glad that she had accidentally taken the day off.

She walked back to her room and grabbed a book and her laptop, and started to head back to the common room. She stopped and thought for a second in the threshold, and made a quick trip back to her bed to scoop up one of her teddy bears. She placed her book and laptop on the floor by the couch and put on one of her CD’s in the player. After propping up a few pillows on the couch and pulling a blanket over her, Kris leaned back with a sigh, happy to close her eyes and listen to the soft music carrying through the room.

Kris picked up her teddy bear and hugged him tightly, swearing that she felt him hug her back. He was a brown bear, with deep, almost black eyes. He had a few wisps of longer fur on the top of his head, that Kris loved to smooth away from his eyes. He wore a knitted vest in a combination of red and greens that was a gift from Kris’s mom when she was a little girl. Kris smiled at the memory of her mom, humoring a little girl that for all the world couldn’t understand why her teddy didn’t have any Christmas clothes to wear when everyone else got to dress up. “I’m sorry that I haven’t spent much time with you lately Papa Bear,” Kris said to the bear as she hugged him, smiling the whole time. This was the first time she had spoken to him in years, and she was almost surprised that she remembered her bear’s name. She had gotten him from her daddy when she was still a toddler, complete with a copy of ‘Goldilocks and the Three Bears,’ which still sat in her nightstand back at her Mom’s house.

Kris wrapped her bear in her arms and leaned back, letting her eyes close for a second. “What a sight I must be,” she thought to herself, “clutching a teddy bear to my breast while a wet diaper is wrapped around me.” For a second, the humiliation and shame threatened to come screaming back, but Mary’s words held them at bay, her soft assurances soothing her soul. “Who do I have to impress,” she said to her bear, glad that a teddy bear accepted you no matter who or what you are. She reached down and touched her diaper again and nodded to herself, realizing for the first time, that maybe there was nothing to be ashamed about. She slowly closed her eyes again, and let the music carry her into a peaceful nap, oblivious to the world outside her door.

She woke up shivering a little, and felt goose bumps pebbling her legs. Kris reached down and felt her cold, wet diaper and decided that it was definitely time for something dry. She blushed as a thought came to her, and quietly remembered Mary’s words and felt the tinge of shame melt away. She bent her knees a little, and felt her middle warm up a bit as she added a little more wetness to her already soaked diaper. She was surprised to feel the wetness slowly crawl up the back of her diaper instead of being soaked into the middle like usual. “I guess that’s what happens when you wet while laying down, huh?” she said to the empty apartment as she rolled off the couch with a groan.

After standing up and being glad that there weren’t any wet spots on the couch, Kris went for a quick change. She thought about what to put on for a few seconds, and decided on a fresh diaper in the end. It was a day off, and wearing a diaper definitely relaxed her, usually at least. She laid down and covered herself with baby oil, followed by a dusting of baby powder that somehow ended up almost all over her. She drew her fresh diaper up, realizing as she was doing it that she didn’t find this strange at all. It was just her putting on her diaper, and that was it. She felt safe and protected in it, and it just felt, natural, to her. She smiled when the last tape was put in place, and gingerly stood up, realizing why babies liked fresh diapers so much. She also stripped off the large pj top, and pulled on one of her warm college sweatshirts.

She walked to the kitchen and began fixing lunch, enjoying the diaper swish the whole time. Pretty soon, her grilled cheese was ready and she was settling on the couch with it and a pile of potato chips, along with a small bottle of water. Kris sat Indian style as she ate, while watching ‘Coyote Ugly’ on one of the network channels. After she finished eating and placed the plate on the floor in front of the couch, Kris noticed that she had gotten a little ketchup on her finger. She really didn’t feel like getting up, so she lightly licked it off, feeling the taste of a mix of ketchup and salt greet her tongue.

She thought for a second, and slowly glided the finger between her lips, sucking for a few seconds and feeling a calm descend on her. She reluctantly pulled her finger out, feeling like a baby that was having the nipple of a bottle taken away too soon. She rested her hand against the front of her face for a second, and barely opened her mouth as her thumb slipped in. She suckled it for a few seconds, letting herself drift away in contentment. She pulled her bear up in her other arm and softly laid down on her side with her legs curled up to her, happily enjoying the feeling of her thumb resting in her mouth.

After a while, Kris dragged herself back up and quickly cleaned up her lunch plate, and felt a little sad that the sun was slowly setting. She knew she’d have to face the real world again tomorrow, and didn’t relish it, enjoying her day of diapers and carefree activities. It was almost five thirty, which meant that Mary may be home soon, but Kris didn’t seem to care. Kris trusted Mary with her diapers and her friendship, along with Mary’s self assurances that she was okay with everything. She tugged her laptop up to her and flipped it open, waiting for when Court would be home so they could talk.

Court’s name popped up a little while later, Kris smiling as the little sign announcing her arrival came up. She quickly typed a message, hoping that she was having a good week.

“Hey Kris, how are you? I’m sorry that we haven’t had a chance to talk for a while, but I’ve been having such a crazy week,” Court penned.

“That’s okay,” Kris typed in reply. “How are you?”

“I’m doing pretty well,” Court answered. “You?”

“The same, for the most part,” Kris answered. Kris went on to explain everything that had happened this week, including what was happening between her and Mary. Court cut her off when she got to the topic of Sam though, and Kris could swear that she could almost feel the anger through the computer.

“You really have to do something,” Court stated.

“I know, but I’m not sure I can. I’ll handle it though, I promise,” Kris said, feeling happy that she had so many people that cared for her.

“Have you told anyone at all?” Court asked.

“Yes, Mary and Helen. Helen is one of my coworkers at the daycare center. She took pretty good care of me when I was shaken up,” Kris answered.

“Well, that’s good then. Okay, onto happier things,” Court said with a smiley face attached.

The two talked for an hour or so until Court had to go make dinner for herself. Mary came home in the middle of it and only a small arch of her eyebrows gave way that she had noticed Kris in diapers again tonight. Kris was glad that she came home alone tonight, not sure she was completely up to being seen in just a diaper by anyone else.

The rest of her night off passed like any other, with the two roommates sharing dinner and talking about their days. Kris decidedly left out a few key pieces, deciding that Mary already knew more then enough about her diaper activities. As the night stars slowly appeared, Kris started thinking about tomorrow’s dinner with Ellen, and the suggestion she had made to Kris last week. Maybe she could manage it after all.

Kris smiled slyly, and Mary gave her a quizzical look. “Oh, it’s nothing,” Kris began, “just thinking about what I’m going to wear to dinner tomorrow night with Ellen.”

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 26 - First Steps

Before going to bed during for the night, Kris gave Court a quick call and asked for any advice she could offer about diapers in public. She didn’t really feel ashamed of them anymore, but still didn’t think she’d want other people staring at her, wondering what was underneath her pants.

“Well, generally, I wear tight jeans if I go out since they stop the crinkling for the most part,” Court typed. “And besides, they give your butt a little extra curve,” she said while laughing.

“It’s not the back I’m worried about, I think it’s the front!” Kris laughed back.

“Well, you can always where a shirt that falls past your waistline a bit, that works pretty well,” Court typed. “I do that if I wear pads also and feeling a little self conscience.”

“I can’t seem to picture you being self conscience,” Kris typed. “I don’t think I’ve met many people as confident as you.”

“Most times I am, but I have my moments like everyone else,” Court answered. “And besides, I wasn’t always out and proud, like most of us. I did my time in the closet too, both in terms of diapers and being gay.”

“I guess so,” Kris said solemnly, “and I hope I come through half as well as you.”

“You will, don’t worry,” Court laughed. “You’re already doing fifty times better then me. I think it took me about two years to start to get the courage up to go out in public in a diaper, and you’re talking about it after a week and a half!”

“I know, it’s strange isn’t it?” Kris said back. “I don’t know if I can really understand it, but everything feels so natural to me, that half the time I do it without much of a second thought. And once you do one step, the next doesn’t seem so bad. A few days ago, I couldn’t have managed even thinking about this I think.”

“Well, from what I’ve seen in you, I see someone that goes in with her whole heart in a way,” Court said seriously. “From what you’ve said of your life, you’ve always kind of gone your own way, which definitely helps if you’re already partly past the ‘what will other’s think’ syndrome. I think that natural feeling you have is telling you in a deep way that what you’re doing is okay and right, and no one’s business but your own.”

“I guess you’re right. I think I’m shocking both you and Mary with my learning curve so far. We’ll have to see what I do to Ellen tonight!” Kris quipped.

“I’m sure you two will have fun. Enjoy the moments, they’re the first you’re going to have feeling something new, so be sure to remember as much as you can!”

“I will Court, thanks,” Kris typed. “Well, I’m going to go to bed now, I’m going to have a long day tomorrow.”

“It’ll be fine missy,” Court replied. “Sweet dreams to you.”

Kris made a quick call to Ellen also to arrange a meeting time in place, smiling throughout the whole conversation. Ellen’s voice just seemed to relax her in a way Kris couldn’t describe. The two agreed on a smaller restaurant for tomorrow’s dinner, an old Italian place that had a pasta special on Wednesday nights. It was only rarely busy, even with the pasta special, meaning the two would have a pretty private place to talk. Kris also figured that it would give her a little extra security for her first night out in public.

Kris got ready for bed a few minutes later, thinking about tomorrow over and over again. It really seemed easy to her. Put on a diaper and walk out the door, without a care in the world. Kris shuddered for a second, remembering thinking the same thing when she took her first trip to buy a package of diapers. That had seemed easy too. She fell asleep to that thought, praying that it really would be as simple as she imagined it should be.

When she woke the next morning, she selected a larger pocketbook then usual. She gently stuffed one of her diapers in one of the pouches with a zipper, happy with the extra security. This was the only way she’d have time in the evening to get ready and meet Ellen in time. The nursery school was usually pretty empty by the end of the day, and Kris figured that she wouldn’t have much of an issue getting her diaper on once the kids were gone.

She sat staring at her closet for a long time before selecting something to wear. The jeans were no problem, she definitely had enough to choose from. In the end, she selected a striped blouse. It was white with a few pink stripes running down her body. The blouse fit her almost perfectly, accenting her hips before flailing out a little past her waist. Kris figured that it was perfect for hiding a little extra padding in her jeans. She also picked a pair of small heeled shoes that were pretty comfortable, and would also put her on more of an even level for talking to Ellen.

The day at work was pretty typical, outside of the hairs that stood up on Kris’s neck every time Sam looked at her. Kris did her best to pretend he didn’t exist, with a reassuring pat from Helen every once in a while carrying her through the day. The children were actually pretty good for a Monday, which Kris figured must mean it was going to be a full moon tonight or something like that. Kris felt her excitement growing with every passing moment, as well as her confidence about how easy it was all going to be.

As the kids started their afternoon ritual of getting ready to leave complete with searching for lost coats, giving hugs to the instructors if they wanted and trying to pack up the day’s projects, Kris felt a few bits of fear start to settle in her. She thought for a few moments wondering if she could really do this. What if she was caught? She could almost see Helen staring at her ass and giving her a look as though she were a freak. She shook her head to clear the images, trying to hold onto the feelings of last night when the diaper was comforting her. Still, she found herself watching the clock wishing that it was a little earlier in the day. Even some of the kids coming by and saying goodbye didn’t stop Kris’s mind from wandering. After a few minutes, she breathed a sigh of relief, thinking the last of the munchkins had left for the day. As she started to turn around, she felt a tiny tug on the bottom of her blouse.

“Commmmmmeeeeee on Kris, we have to go home soon,” Jessica said in what could only be called a whine. She wore a pair of blue overalls today with a white, cotton shirt that was covered with little leaf designs. Add a straw hat and a little bit of hay, and Kris would have sworn that she was just in from Nebraska. A pair of ‘Dora the Explorer’ sneakers were on her feet, with the cuffs of the overalls rolled up a little to show a pair of white socks with pink hearts etched on them.

“Go ahead bratling, you and your mom can leave,” Kris answered with a smile.

“Don’t call me bratling!” Jessica said trying to sound serious. Kris had adopted that nick name as soon as she met Jessica when she first started, and she’d heard Helen say it a couple of times to Jessica’s dismay. “We can’t until you leave, mommy said so.”

Kris just shook her head. She had never thought of this. Of course Helen would never leave her hear alone after the other day, not unless Sam was gone as well and he rarely if ever left before the two women. “Hmmm, okay, well, I’ll go get ready and then we can go, okay?”

“Okay! I’ll go tell my mommy,” Jessica answered as she turned and skipped from the room.

Kris walked to the storage area and picked up her purse and stood for a few minutes. “Could I still get away with it?” she thought silently. The little bits of fear she had were screaming for her to take this excuse and run while she could, but something held her from doing it. She had waited all week for this, and almost wanted to do it just to show Ellen how she was doing with everything. “Besides,” she thought, “I only have to make it to the door, that’s it, right?”

She grabbed her purse and headed to the girl’s bathroom in the school. She locked the door behind her as she felt her breaths quicken in anticipation of what she was about to do. She gazed at herself in the mirror for a few seconds, her mirror image giving her silent assurances that everything was going to be okay. “I can do this,” Kris said silently to her mirror twin. “Put on my diaper, make sure everything is tucked away, and just head out to meet Ellen, right?”

Kris unzipped her purse and quietly drew the diaper out, sure any sound, any crinkle would escape the door and echo through the hallways. She caught herself holding her breath, and willed herself to calm down and not act like such a ninny. After tugging down her jeans and underwear so they hung around her ankles, Kris gently unfolded her diaper, enjoying the faint scent that drifted up every time she opened one. She drew the diaper in between her legs and slowly raised it, making sure her blouse was on the outside. She winced when she heard the loud rip that accompanied the tapes being opened, sure that Helen had heard it. She shook her head and just pressed on, drawing each tape slower then the last, and swearing that the slower it was, the louder it seemed. After doing four of them, she decided it was on snuggly enough, and Kris figured her jeans would also hold it to her.

She eyed the toilet for a second and felt a little pull in her bladder. “Hmm, didn’t even think of that,” Kris said softly. She looked at her diaper, and more importantly at the tapes that were holding it on her. The thought of removing them and redoing them later made Kris shudder. “Well, I guess I’ll be okay, and even if I’m not, that’ll be okay too!” Kris thought silently to herself as she chuckled. She began pulling her panties up when she realized the tight underwear wouldn’t fit over her diaper, so she stepped one leg out of her jeans and tossed them to the side. She pulled the jeans up, and had to tug for a few minutes to get them to completely slide over the thickness of her diaper. Since these were definitely hip-hugger jeans, she was glad her diaper didn’t add much to her waistline. Kris took in the sight of herself in the mirror for a few minutes, nodding to herself when she turned in a slow circle and didn’t see even a trace of white plastic peeking out.

She scooped up her panties and tossed them in her purse as she began walking to open the door. A very faint crinkling accompanied her, and Kris stopped as she tested her movements, feeling worry grow with every faint whisper of her diaper. Kris kept reaching for the door, but felt herself pull back every time as she started, her face heating every time she heard the diaper shift a little. She closed her eyes, trying to pull herself together and hold the comforting memories of what a diaper felt like, but they just wouldn’t come. She felt a little dampness on her forehead, and realized that she couldn’t do it. She turned to start unzipping her pants again when she felt the soft padding press against her, sending a warm feeling up through her body. Kris took a deep breath to center herself, and silently whispered “my diaper keeps me safe, there is nothing wrong with it, my diaper feels nice” over and over again, as if saying a prayer to keep her fear at bay.

With one final, deep breath, Kris reached for the door handle and swung the door open, and slowly walked out of the bathroom. She saw Jessica and Helen waiting at the end of the hall, obviously waiting for Kris so they could leave. She smiled and held up a finger to say ‘one sec’ to Helen, and took a small detour as she grabbed her coat. She quickly pulled the loose coat over her, thinking it was another thing to absorb a little sound. She headed back to the hallway and started a slow walk to the exit, praying all the while that neither Helen or Jessica would notice anything.

“Hey you, are you okay today? Moving like molasses,” Helen laughed. Kris’s eyes went wide and she naturally assumed that Helen noticed the pace of her walk. She was about to speed up when Helen continued. “I’ve never seen you take so long to get your things together to get out of here. Usually, you’re pretty happy to say goodbye at the first chance!”

“I know, but I’m feeling a little off today, you know?” Kris said. “Almost like I’m taking my first steps or something,” she added silently for herself. She felt as if every eye was on her, even people she couldn’t see. They either noticed the bulk of her pants, the faint crinkle, or even the faint diaper smell that she enjoyed so much. She shook her head, trying to clear her head, realizing that she was crossing into slightly irrational fears. She was also glad that Jessica had hugged her goodbye earlier.

“Well, I can understand why you’re feeling off,” Helen said. “Maybe you should take some more time off?”

“No thanks, I miss the kids too much. Even the bratling,” Kris said with a laugh. She forestalled the inevitable ‘Don’t call me BRATLING’ by saying a quick goodbye and veering to her car.

She looked over her shoulder and saw Helen and Jessica getting in their car like usual, without staring at Kris or anything. Kris smiled to herself. If she could get away without being noticed by a good friend and a young girl, then she should be able to get past anyone else. She squeezed her legs and laughed, still not quite believing she was outside in a diaper.

“God, I can’t wait to see what Ellen thinks,” Kris laughed. “Maybe I’ll get a diaper rookie of the year award!” She jumped in her car with her diaper cushioning her bottom, feeling a sense of pure freedom all about her. She started her car, and began the drive over to the restaurant.

Chapter 27 - Dreams come True

When Kris arrived at the restaurant, she saw Ellen waiting in the hostess area. Her hair was down today, the waves framing her face in a completely different way then the pony tail Kris had grown used to. The flipped up sides seemed to give her a softer look, but the same intelligent, strong willed and confident look still shone in her eyes through her glasses. She wore a pant suit today in a deep blue, almost black color. Small, white, tailored stripes ran along the length of it, with a small brooch pinned just above her left breast.

The restaurant itself was very tastefully decorated. A few landscape paintings adorned the walls, mainly of what Kris assumed were Italian homes and towns. The lighting was fairly dim, with the light from the candles on the tables giving the room a soft feel. The tables were covered with deep red table cloths, with white table napkins folded neatly on each place setting. A small bar sat in the corner of the room, with a dark haired bartender that was busy pouring a glass of red wine.

After quick hug and hello, the two women walked to the podium near the entrance to the dining room. The hostess smiled when she saw Ellen, and the two fell into an easy conversation as she guided them to their table. Kris gathered that the two knew each other, which between that and Kris’s more casual wear made her feel a little awkward. She followed behind, the soft tap of Ellen’s heels echoing softly off the floor. Kris wondered if her diaper was echoing as well as she walked, still swearing that the swish of her passing must surely announce what she had on. She breathed a sigh of relief as the hostess placed the two menus she was holding on a table, which was tucked away in a back corner, with the bar being in the corner closest to them.

“Enjoy your dinner ladies,” the hostess said as the two were seated. Well, almost seated at least. Kris waited until she had walked away a little bit before sitting, doing it as slow as possible to try and contain the inevitable crinkles. Kris smiled over at Ellen, glad to feel even a little bit safe for the first time since walking out in her diaper.

“I’m amazed by you,” Ellen said suddenly with a smile as she reached over and squeezed Kris’s hand. “I can’t believe you actually did it.”

“Me either,” Kris said laughing a little bit. “It took a lot of willpower, let me tell you. And on top of it all, I had to walk past Helen, one of my coworkers and her daughter. I think I was nearly ready to faint!”

“I can imagine,” Ellen answered laughing. “I’m not sure I could have done it right in front of someone I knew. That’s what amazes me. That you seem be so confident so early on. I wish I knew how you did it!”

“Well, I think a few things have helped. Acceptance and encouragement from a few good friends, and meeting new friends that have given some great advice,” Kris said while grinning at Ellen, who blushed slightly from the compliment. “But I think the biggest factor is that they just feel right to me. I think I have that advantage over you. You may have needed diapers, but you didn’t want diapers. They make me feel comforted for some reason. I’m guessing that you probably hated them when you first started needing them.”

“You have no idea,” Ellen said looking down for a moment. “I felt so out of place for so long, almost like I was a freak, or a child or something. I was just so confused. Wearing protection was a heavy burden to hold at times. You have no idea how excited I was to meet you, thinking that you were another young woman who was going through this. Just the chance to share the experiences felt like a gift to me.”

Kris felt her face heat a little as Ellen talked, realizing that their experiences really were completely different, and hoping that the disappointment Ellen felt wasn’t too hurtful. “I’m really sorry that I’m not that person Ellen, I truly wish I was. But you can share anything with me that you’d like, and I’d appreciate it and love it if you did. I know our experiences may be different, but there is a lot in common too, and maybe we’ll have fun finding some of those areas. I know that your advice on getting the baby oil and powder was definitely good to know! I do hope we can still be there for each other.”

“Oh, I think you know we can,” Ellen said brightening a little. “Especially after the last dinner. I enjoyed talking to you little one, and who knows, maybe one day you’ll help with a different set of issues.”

Kris’s brows drew together as she puzzled over what Ellen meant, as well as the title ‘little one’ that Ellen had bestowed on her. For a second, she felt a protest of ‘don’t call me that’ form in her throat, but held it back when she thought of Jessica and how she did the same thing. “You said you hated wearing diapers in the beginning. How do you feel about them now?”

“Oh, I’m sure you know I’ve made peace with them now. I’m not thrilled to be in them as it can be awkward at times, but now they’re just another thing to deal with, you know?” Ellen answered simply.

“I guess that makes sense,” Kris replied.

“Well, it’s better then some other things that people have to deal with!” she said with a little laugh. “It’s just no big deal anymore, which is a nice relief.”

“I’m sure,” Kris replied in a level tone. “I guess I had my own battles though.”

“What do you mean?” Ellen asked.

“Well, you needed diapers, which was justification for wearing them. I just wanted to. Getting past the guilt of wanting this took a lot of thinking and soul searching,” Kris said seriously, shuddering a little bit at how she had felt a few times as she explored wearing diapers. “You’re taught from the time you’re little about how wrong it is to be in diapers if you’re even just four years old, to say nothing of my age!”

“I never thought of that,” Ellen said as she sipped from a glass of water. “I just don’t see why though, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it that I can see.”

“Me either,” Kris replied with a grin, once again saying a small blessing that Ellen was so open minded. “I guess I’m slowly getting to the point where I don’t care as much about what other people think. Sometimes I feel the shame push at me, but I just think of all the comfort and joy my diaper brings me when I feel it on. Compared to that feeling, shame doesn’t stand much of a chance.” Kris suddenly laughed, and Ellen gave her a confused look. “I was just thinking that I sound like I have all this together, ignoring the fact that I almost had a mild heart attack this afternoon while just trying to walk out of the nursery school!”

“That is pretty funny,” Ellen said while smiling. After a few seconds, She dropped her eyes in thought.

“What are you thinking about?” Kris asked, wondering what had occupied her all of the sudden.

Ellen opened her mouth to answer, but quickly closed it as she watched the waitress head over to them. The waitress was a bit of ‘meaty’ woman, and Kris could see that she carried herself with a confidence that usually came from being pretty strong willed or strong bodied. Her eyes were a deep brown that Kris could barely see in the low lighting, with black curly that tumbled down to her shoulders. Kris could see why Ellen liked this place so much. Everything just seemed to scream ITALIAN, which was almost creepy in a way. The two women quickly ordered, complete with a glass of wine for each of them. They both watched as the bartender filled the glasses, before turning back to each other after the waitress brought them over.

“So,” Kris opened. “What were you thinking about?”

“I was just wondering what you really wanted out of all of this. I haven’t heard you really talk about it yet, and was just curious. I’ve noticed that often times people that are into diapers usually have a whole dream life planned, at least involving diapers, and was curious what yours was.”

“I don’t really think I’ve thought about it very much yet. Court seems to have a plan for herself, but we haven’t really talked about it yet. I’m not sure. I think I’m kind of confused right now. Court is wonderful, and I love spending time with her, and being with her, but I felt a little out of place with her the one day that we were together at her house. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I loved every minute of it, but it really was her dream, not mine,” Kris said in a flurry of words, barely pausing to take a breath as words poured out. At the end of the litany, she took a small sip of wine and put her head back for a second, searching for her own answers. “I guess I do know that I am attracted to diapers, or at least to what they represent. I feel a little weak kneed when someone uses a young name for me like baby or any of the others, even though I try to act like it upsets me. I’m finding a new, deep love for things I haven’t looked at in years, like my old teddy bears and things.”

Ellen continually nodded as Kris spoke, and only occasionally lifting her wine glass to her lips. “Everything you’ve said makes pretty good sense,” Ellen said. “Let’s simplify it a bit. What do you want right now?”

Kris sighed a bit, feeling frustrated that she didn’t really know. “I have no clue,” she muttered, feeling a little foolish. “I just really don’t know, which is part of the problem. I’ve never really done anything like this, so how can I ever know for sure? I mean, I think I’d like to explore baby play a little more, but feel silly sometimes.” Kris shivered a little when she saw that Ellen’s eyes weren’t on her, but on the waitress who just stepped up to the table. Ellen gave her a reassuring look as e waitress gently placed their dinners in front of them, but Kris knew she must have heard the last sentence at least. “See why I feel silly sometimes,” Kris muttered under her breath to her dinner on the table.

“Oh, don’t worry, what’s the real difference? Chances are, you’ll never see her again, and if you do, she’ll probably never remember you,” Ellen said with a small giggle. “But you still haven’t answered the question. What do you really want Kris?”

Kris looked up wide eyed, not quite knowing what to say. “I… I don’t know Ellen. I want to feel less confused, I want to feel like I know where I’m going, and I want to know that everything is alright,” Kris stammered out, feeling the weight of her uncertainty clinging to her. “I… I want someone to help me.” She hung her head for a second, wondering what Ellen must think of someone that sounded so lost.

Ellen just nodded once as if nothing strange was said. “I made an offer last week, and it still stands,” she replied coolly. Kris looked up to her face and tried to figure out what she was thinking. She saw the same knowing, confident face as usual, but there was also a touch of something else. Ellen looked brighter for some reason. She lost the thought as the words settled over her. Kris had been thinking of how to bring up her offer without asking directly, and here was Ellen putting it neatly in front of her.

“Why Ellen? Why would you want to help me like this? Aren’t I a freak to you?” Kris asked, still feeling confused.

“You should know me better then that angel,” she replied softly. “I guess the best thing that came from being forced to wear diapers is that I’m a bit less judgmental of people then I used to be. And I like you, and think you’re a good friend. Especially with what you’ve said you went through to keep your friendship with Mary strong. Besides, babies almost always need an adult guiding them and holding their hands, especially in the beginning,” she finished with a slight giggle. “Besides, I think it may be fun. I haven’t been baby shopping in a long time. And the best reason is that it’s something that I know you want, and I love to help people, even if I have to drag them by their hair until they ask for it, or admit they need it!”

“So you wouldn’t mind a shopping date?” Kris asked, trying to keep the hope out of her voice.

“Not at all,” Ellen replied. “I definitely had fun the last time we were picking out things together!”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. I couldn’t believe the fire alarms didn’t go off with all the heat I was giving off from my face!”

The two laughed for a few seconds at the memory of their first encounter. Kris couldn’t shake the feeling of being naked down to her diaper in front of Ellen. She almost repositioned herself so she was sitting on her foot to give her a little more height, but decided it wasn’t worth the crinkling that was sure to accompany her moving. Ellen broke the silence after a few moments, and soon the two were busy talking about their daily lives, as they ate their dinners and sipped wine.

A short time later, the two walked out of the restaurant, and Kris felt the wine rush to her head as the cold air tickled her skin. She felt an intense need to wet for a second as the temperature outside hit her, but forced the need back down as her hand pressed the middle of her diaper. She felt herself blush deeply when she realized that she must look like a small child trying to hold it in that way. She quickly rearranged herself, trying to make it look like she was just making her pants a little more comfortable. She glanced over at Ellen and thought she saw a little humor in her eyes and a small hint of a smile on her lips, but the rest of her facial features said that she didn’t notice anything unusual.

Ellen rounded on her as they reached her car, her hair swinging around her, with the glow of the moon illuminating her skin, giving her a pale beauty. Kris always loved the night, feeling at home in it where others liked the daylight. “So when do you want to have our shopping date?” Ellen asked wryly. Kris saw that her glasses had slid down her nose a bit, but the same strong-willed look came though them. She couldn’t even be sure that Ellen knew how much she glowed, how her presence would pull people to her. Kris felt the magnetism from her the first day they met, placing trust in her instead of her usual wariness.

“Whenever is good for you is fine by me,” Kris said as she opened her car.

“How about tonight?” Ellen said with a smile. “Walmart will be open for another couple of hours, and probably not too busy. It’s not the best place for this, but it’s a start if you want.”

Kris thought for a few seconds and checked her watch, trying to give herself a few seconds to think. “Okay! I think I’d like that,” she said with a shy smile.

“I thought you may,” Ellen said, grinning back.

“Would you like to take one car? I wouldn’t mind driving,” Kris said as she tossed her pocketbook in the back seat.

“That sounds great, and it’s only a couple blocks from here anyway,” Ellen said as she walked around the car and sat in the passenger seat. She giggled for a few seconds as Kris sat down, and Kris looked her with a questioning look. “Oh, nothing. It’s just strange. Usually, it’s the adult that drives to go buy baby supplies!”

Kris just shook her head and wondered what she was getting into. The car started with a soft growl, and the sounds of the loud swing music Kris was listening to earlier filled the car. Kris laughed as put the car in drive, wondering what the trip to Walmart would bring.

Chapter 28 - A seed planted

By the time they reached the store, both Kris and Ellen were loudly singing along with the music, and everyone once in a while catching each other’s eyes and laughing at themselves. They saw that the store was pretty crowded as usual, but the lateness seems to have thinned it out more then it usually was. Kris smiled when she found a close parking space, a bit relieved that she had to do a little less walking with her diaper swishing underneath her pants. A small passing storm was causing a small downpour, so the two quickly walked towards the door, with Kris pulling her coat around herself to keep dry.

“I don’t mind being wet, but not this kind of wet,” she heard Ellen muttering as she shook out her coat. Kris felt her hair clinging to her head, and knew that it would be a wavy pile of tangles before too long. A small sigh escaped her as she wished for a comb instead of her fingers which were only making things worse. Ellen had tied her hair back in the meantime, giving her a look that reminding Kris of a conservative librarian. Kris also felt a pinch between her legs, and knew the rain outside wasn’t helping to keep her diaper dry. She had known the wine was going to go right through her, but had figured that she’d be on her way home before that happened. She glanced at Ellen for a second, wondering if there was some excuse she could use to be alone for a few seconds so she could wet without her watching.

The pair were soon wandering the aisles, looking at all the various things that lined the shelves. Ellen took them on a sort of round about tour, stopping in a few different departments. Kris kept seeing the baby needs aisle every now and then, and kept wondering why Ellen wasn’t taking them there. After a little bit, Ellen steered them over to the young girls section, dragging Kris through the racks of various clothes in all sorts of colors. She stopped in front of a circular rack with winter dresses on them, in sizes ranging from size 4 to 16. Kris looked on as Ellen looked through the selection, giggling to herself every now and then. Kris looked up at her with a questioning look, but Ellen either didn’t notice or ignored her, not sharing her thoughts.

The rack had a pretty big mix of dresses. She noticed plaid cotton dresses in different colors for Christmas, with hems that looked to come just above the knee on a little girl. Kris especially liked one with dark red and green interwoven strips, with elbow length sleeves. The sleeves were puffed out a little, and a little dark green lace was stitched at the end. Ellen passed it by, pushing it along the rack to the side along with the others. After a few more seconds, Ellen pulled out a dress that left Kris’s mouth hanging open slightly. The bodice and sleeves were made of a deep blue velvet, with small lace cuffs framing the long sleeves. The bottom was made out of a silky, soft looking material that seemed to flare out a little at the base. Tiny white snowflakes were embroidered around the hem, giving it a beautiful finish.

Kris sighed as she looked at the dress, trying to remember what it had been like when she used to wear them when she was little. Ellen held it up in front of her, and Kris lost herself when she felt the softness of the velvet between her fingers. She smiled up at Ellen, still holding the fabric in her fingers.

“It’s beautiful,” Kris said, still feeling a little taken with the dress.

“It is,” Ellen said simply. “It would never fit though,” she added with a frown. She took the dress and draped it in front of Kris, giggling a little bit to herself. Kris was feeling a little silly with the dress being put up to her, but didn’t think to say anything to Ellen about it. As she stood there, she heard a light voice start talking behind her.

“Excuse me, is there anything I can help you with?” she heard.

Kris spun around, and felt her cheeks warm as she looked at one of the employees. She looked down at the ground, hoping the saleswoman hadn’t seen anything. Kris tried to speak, but she couldn’t quite figure out what to say.

“No, we’re fine thank you,” she heard Ellen behind her, and Kris felt herself relax. “I’m just picking out clothes for my daughter for Christmas.”

Kris’s head jerked up but she didn’t say anything. She felt her face flush even more, and was sure the saleswoman was about to break out laughing at her. The lady just smiled at the two of them for a second. “It’s so much fun to look for girls clothes during this time, isn’t it? I love winter dresses.”

“Oh, so do I,” Ellen answered. “I think all little girls need a few pretty ones to wear. I don’t usually like to take them shopping though, they sometimes get so sulky and I don’t know what to do with them.” Kris knew that was meant for her, but chose to ignore the comment, and hoped her cheeks hadn’t gotten any redder.

“That’s so true!,” the saleswoman said brightly. “Well, let me know if I can help with anything,” she said as she walked away.

Kris turned around to face Ellen, still feeling a little humiliated. “Why the hell did you say all that?”

“I had to say something for why we were here,” Ellen said calmly. “And I don’t like to lie when I don’t have to. She didn’t notice anything angel, just two women shopping together, even though one really was acting like a pouty little girl. Either way though, you liked the dress. Why do you feel ashamed of it?”

“I don’t know,” Kris said honestly. “I just worry a lot about what others think of me.”

“I noticed. I know you’ve probably had to pee for like an hour now at least, and was wondering what you were going to do. I wondered if you’d be at least a little bit of an adult and just ask me for a little privacy instead of suffering like you have. I guess not though,” Ellen said speaking plainly.

“How’d you know?” Kris asked looking up slowly.

“A mother just does,” Ellen answered simply. “But even a daddy probably would have noticed your behavior tonight. You kept looking for somewhere to go where I wouldn’t see you, I kept noticing you squeezing your legs together in the car, and you had two glasses of wine, which would make any woman have to go by now.”

“I just didn’t know what to do,” Kris said sadly, starting to feel like the sulky little girl Ellen had called her earlier.

“I already know you’re in diapers baby, and I don’t care, and neither should you.” Kris looked around frantically to make sure no one else was around, and then blushed when she realized what she was doing. “Just relax a little and try not to worry so much. I saw the real you when you looked at this dress a little bit ago, when you lost yourself for a second and were just you, without all your worries about other people. That’s a little girl parents like to go shopping with.”

Kris thought for a few seconds, the word parent rolling through her. “Ellen couldn’t really want that, could she?” Kris thought to herself. “No, she was only saying an example, that was it. Who could ever really want a baby like this. She was here shopping though, wasn’t she?”

Kris visibly sighed. “Okay, I’ll try to not be so uptight,” she answered softly, feeling like a five year old that had an apology dragged out of her.

“Good girl,” Ellen said with a smile. She looked up over Kris and did a quick check of the store. “If you want to, there is no one around, so you can feel safe. Go ahead and wet.”

Kris felt the pressure release as she started to wet her diaper. Her eyes went wide for a second, not really knowing why she let go all of the sudden, with Ellen still looking down at her. She felt herself give way as soon as she heard the words, the wetness of two glasses of wine soaking her diaper. She felt her face heat, and struggled to stop her knees from bending like she usually did when she wet. Ellen seemed to know when she was done, and Kris was greeted with a loving smile when she looked up.

“See, not so bad, huh?” Ellen said in a near whisper.

“No, I guess not,” was all Kris said.

“Going to sulk some more now?” Ellen said with a little laugh.

“No I am not!” Kris said before she could stop herself.

“By the way, is it okay for me to chastise you if you’re being silly?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Kris said grumpily, not really paying attention.

Ellen just smiled down at her, and Kris wondered what on Earth she was thinking. “Well, should we go to the baby aisle?” Kris turned to leave, and was surprised to feel a light smack on her butt. She jumped feeling startled and turned back around. “That was for your naughty word by the way. Sulkiness I can accept, but not rudeness.” Kris was about to launch into a litany of rude words when she felt Ellen’s gaze meet hers. She had a stern look in her eyes that said she would broker no nonsense, and her hand held as if saying the light swat wasn’t anything. Kris felt her protest die away under the look, and even felt a little meekness creep into her. “Do you have anything to say?” Ellen said.

“No, I don’t,” Kris answered. Ellen’s look darkened, and Kris hastily rushed on. “Besides that I’m sorry for saying the bad word.” Kris couldn’t help but feel like a chastised child, but turned around trying to act like a grown woman for all she was worth, swaying her hips as she walked away with her head held high. When she turned around to see if Ellen was following, she saw the older woman watching her with an amused grin on her face. Ellen began following after a few seconds, and quickly fell in step with Kris. Kris didn’t feel like talking very much, and only every once in a while glanced at Ellen.

Thoughts kept going through her mind as Kris thought about the swat on her behind. She knew that she should be outraged, but couldn’t quite keep the feeling. She had done something wrong, she knew that. She had had not right to speak to Ellen that way, but why did she do that? . Why wasn’t she more upset? She had said it was okay. Kris was trying to stay mad at her, but felt the anger melt away slowly as they walked, each withdrawn a little into themselves.

Pretty soon, they entered the baby section and Kris forgot about all her worries and anger as rows of supplies greeted her. Her eyes went wide for a few seconds, and Ellen hugged her from behind for a second, which Kris gratefully accepted. Ellen took her hand and lightly started pulling her forward, and Kris slowly willed her legs to follow along behind. Every step seemed to send a loud, echoing crinkle into the store, and Kris looked around nervously expecting to find everyone looking at her. She breathed a sigh of relief when she didn’t see anyone, but she was still positive that her diaper was much louder then it was earlier for some reason.

“Okay, well lets see what our baby needs to start out with,” Ellen said brightly, plainly enjoying this. The two of them walked the aisle slowly, with Ellen pointing out things here and there and asking Kris what she thought. Kris felt like her face was flushing the entire time, and usually only managed a few words here and there when Ellen spoke to her. After what seemed an eternity, the pair headed to the checkout line, the handheld basket full of baby supplies, and Kris still being led by her wrist and trying her best to keep up.

The cashier was an older woman, probably in her mid fifties. Kris could see a few gray roots under her dyed hair, along with the slightly wrinkled skin that came with age. She had a pair of warm blue eyes, and Kris could almost feel her radiating a grandmotherly quality. She wore the usual blue Walmart outfit like all the other cashiers, and had a nametag that read Joyce. A strong sounding ‘I can help you now ma’am’ broke her out of her revelry, and Kris looked up to see Ellen placing the items on the conveyor belt. Her face warmed a bit as the items coasted down towards Joyce, and Kris pulled at the collar of her blouse to let a little heat escape.

“Hello,” Ellen said warmly as they reached where Joyce was busy wringing up their purchases.

“Hello,” Joyce replied. “Are we going to be having a new baby running around soon?”

“I definitely hope so!” Ellen replied with a smile. “Otherwise, this is a nice waste of money!”

“That’s true,” Joyce answered. She looked up at Kris for a few seconds with a smile. “You definitely have a little of the glow sweetie, but if you’re this warm already, I wouldn’t look forward to being a little further along. Or for when you’re my age!”

“Oh, don’t mention that,” Ellen said with a laugh. “I watched my mother for years deal with the ‘power surges’, and I know mine are going to be just as bad.”

“Well, it looks like you’ve got a long way to go before that happens,” Joyce replied. “Plus, a new baby to distract you when it does.”

“I can’t wait,” Ellen said with a giggle.

Kris watched as Joyce finished checking them out, and as she mentally scratched her head at a few of the purchases. She started to take out her wallet to pay when Ellen handed Joyce a few bills. Kris looked over and saw Ellen smiling at her, and Kris knew there was no way she was going to be allowed to pay for the purchases. Ellen picked up the two bags that Joyce handed her and said a quick good bye while started towards the exit. Kris caught up and walked along side, trying to think of what to say to thank Ellen for coming here with her. In the end, the two just smiled briefly at each other, as they pulled their coats back around them.

As they left the store, Kris could help but feel her excitement grow as she looked at the two bags Ellen was carrying. Even her wet diaper wasn’t distracting her from imagining the feelings that the various things would bring. The two held hands as they drove back to get Ellen’s car, with Kris looking behind her constantly to make sure the bags were still there. Ellen laughed a little every time she looked, and squeezed her hand as a way to say she was happy to be able to help. Kris couldn’t wait to tear into the items, and felt a little annoyed that Mary would be home and she’d have to wait until tomorrow.

“Or do I?” Kris said softly to herself.

Chapter 29 - Growing up

Kris dropped off Ellen a few minutes later, the two still giggling over the silliest things the whole time. They hugged each other for a few a few seconds, and as they pulled away Ellen gently trailed her hand down the side of Kris’s face. Kris blushed at the touch, but never took her eyes off of Ellen’s. She looked like she wanted to say something, but didn’t quite know what it was.

“Are you okay?” Kris asked softly.

“Yes, I’m doing great thank you,” Ellen said with a smile. The smile definitely reached her eyes, so Kris knew she wasn’t lying. Kris knew her eyes were still hiding something though.

“You sure? You look like you’ve got something on your mind,” Kris said neutrally, not wanting to push Ellen too hard. Despite everything that had happened, the two only knew each other from a total of three meetings, which didn’t give Kris much in the way of ‘friendship credit’ in her opinion.

“No, I’m really fine. Just something I’ve been meaning to ask you, but I think I’ll save it for another time,” Ellen answered with a smile.

Kris looked at Ellen for a moment and knew she wasn’t going to get anywhere with her. “Okay then,” she said quietly. “I had a lot of fun tonight, and hope you did too.”

“I definitely did,” Ellen said with a lightness to her voice, “and I can’t wait for dinner next week. Same time?”

“That sounds good to me. Safe drive home,” Kris replied while giving Ellen a quick hug.

“You too, goodnight little miss,” Ellen replied with a giggle as she stepped out of the car.

Kris watched to make sure Ellen was all set in her car and on her way home before turning around to eye the two packages in the back seat of her car. She saw a package of large Goodnite pull ups peaking out of the top of one of the bags. Kris remembered smiling like a silly fool when Ellen calmly pointed out that she would easily fit into them, and the prints on them were just too cute to not buy any. That was she ended up with most of the litany of items in the bags behind her. Every time she said no to something, Ellen would either point out how adorable it was, or if that didn’t work, to try to convince Kris of how practical it was. A few items ended up in the cart solely on the virtue of being on sale! Kris shook her head, wondering how a small shopping trip had ended up with her having two bags full of baby supplies. She looked over the bags again, and knew there was no way she’d be able to hide the packages from Mary. With a slight shrug, Kris started her car and headed home, a small smile on her lips.

She arrived home a short time later, swinging into the parking space in front of the apartment complex. Kris had changed her mind a few dozen times on the trip home about whether to bring the bags upstairs, but in the end found no good reason not to. Mary seemed okay with everything, and she’s the one who wanted Kris in diapers at night after all, Kris figured. She eyed the windows in the front of the building, hoping that most of the other tenants were in for the night. She really didn’t want to have to explain why she was carrying a package of children’s pull ups!

She stepped out of the car and quickly grabbed the two packages from the backseat of her car. She practically bounded up the stairs, feeling a little surge of excitement grow with each step towards her apartment. The packages were rustling with each step, marking her passage with each step. She made one last long leap up as she landed at the top of the stairs, facing the door, feeling a small rush come over her. She took a deep breath as she stood facing the door, feeling a late wave of nervousness come over her. Music was being played on the other side of the door, announcing that Mary was definitely home. The sound of steps coming down ended her second guessing as she twisted the door knob. She walked into the apartment quickly, hoping she wasn’t seen by whoever was upstairs.

“Hey Mary, how are ya?” Kris asked as she stumbled through the doorway, her pocket book hanging on a finger as she tried to put the packages down. “I had a pretty good night with…” Kris started to say, but trailed off as she finally looked up. She felt her breath quicken as she saw Mary working on her laptop on the chair in the room, with Matt sitting across from her with a stack of papers in his hands that he was sifting through. He smiled up at her, and Kris felt her knees start to melt a little while feeling her heart speed up. She shook her head, remembering that she was speaking. She felt Matt’s eyes on her as she willed herself to speak, thinking it was unfair for him to be so good looking. “With Ellen,” Kris began again. “We had a nice dinner.”

“And a little shopping after I see,” Mary answered with a bright smile as she looked back towards her laptop. After a few clicks, she looked back at Kris, still smiling.

Kris stood stunned for a few seconds. She had forgotten the bags that were surrounding her feet, the package of pull-ups announcing to all the world what was in them. “Yeah, a little bit. It was fun,” she stammered out as she felt her face warm. Kris thought that the redder she got, the wider Mary’s smile became.

“I bet,” Mary replied as she went back to typing. Kris breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that the conversation was over. She bent to pick up the bags when Mary added “So what did you get?” almost as an afterthought. Matt glanced back up at her for a second, as he shifted to a new page.

“Oh, just some things, you know,” Kris said neutrally. As she finished picking up the bags, she felt her diaper brush against her. She went rigid for a second, mentally berating herself for forgetting she had it on. She stood up and started a slow walk to her room, praying that the conversation was over. Kris winced at every diaper rustle, and was glad that the plastic bags helped to cover the sound a little bit. After a few steps, she stopped and turned to face the other two. Mary had her mouth open like she was about to say something, and Kris could only imagine what it was going to be. After the past week, she had a vague idea. Instead of speaking, Mary sat back and closed her mouth, tilting her head a little as she looked over at Kris.

“Oh, by the way, I bought some pull-ups today to wear around the house, I hope you don’t mind,” Kris said nonchalantly as she held up the bags. Kris felt a cool satisfaction as she watched Mary arch her eyebrows at her statement. Matt just looked up briefly and smiled again, acting as if this was the most normal conversation in the world. “I also thought they’d be good to have in case I wanted to wear one out again like I did today.” Kris smiled as she turned around and headed for her door, amazed that for once she had left Mary speechless. Even Matt being there to hear about her diapers didn’t seem to bother her.

Kris giggled to herself as she closed her bedroom door and threw the bags near her bed. She felt more liberated then she had in a long time, breathing a deep sigh of relief as she realized that everything was out now to Mary (and Matt for that matter), and she didn’t care. She knelt on the floor and began rifling through the bags, a small smile growing across her face.

“This is going to be a fun night,” she thought to herself, as she slowly tore open the package of Goodnites.

As the door closed behind Kris, Mary couldn’t help but smile. In the course of only two weeks, Kris was proudly showing off her diapered butt around the apartment. In the past, Mary often thought she saw a streak in Kris, but this was the first real sign of it she had managed to catch, and it took a steep threat to bring it out. And now, half a month later, not only was she accepting her diapers, but a little backtalk was popping up. She grinned in spite of herself, enjoying the rare display of backbone. She looked over where Matt was still looking through papers, a grin resting on his face as well. “That wasn’t what I expected at all,” Mary said softly, trying to make sure the words didn’t reach Kris’s door.

“I have to admit, it shocked me,” Matt replied. “I couldn’t believe it was the same woman who was huddling under a blanket to hide herself a few days ago.”

“I think girl is more appropriate at this point,” Mary replied. “Two bags, and I bet there wasn’t one adult item in them. I agree with you though, I can’t believe it’s the same person.”

“That seems to happen when someone finds something that pulls them,” Matt replied. “And it seems like she’s had enough encouragement as well,” he finished with a smile.

“Encouragement, prodding, active pushing, whatever you want to call it,” Mary said with a laugh. “Well, I guess getting her to accept that she’s not a freak was only one step. Now it’s time to work on seeing if she’d ever be willing to give up having so much control. I’m not sure how she’s going to react, but it’s going to be fun finding out.”

“What are you planning?” Matt asked with a touch of light in his eyes.

The conversation carried on for an hour or so before the two said good night and Mary turned in to get some rest. Her thoughts drifted around everything she and Matt had talked about, all the details coming together. She smiled to herself as she felt sleep start to tug at her.

“Oh Kris,” she murmured to herself. “let’s see how deep your needs go. It’s going to be a fun few weeks.”

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 30 - Sliding

After tearing open the bag of pull-ups on her floor, Kris slowly drew one out and looked at it. She felt the padding and could tell they were a little thinner then her diapers. More importantly though, she noticed that there was a good deal less sound that came from it. Curiosity got the best of her as she stripped off her pants, looking at her soaked diaper for the first time since putting it on. It was really in bad shape, and sagging to the point that the tapes were almost ready to give way, wetness being seen throughout her diaper. She undid tapes, and shivered as she felt the coolness of her room brush over her privates. The diaper dropped to the floor in a heap, and Kris reflectively covered herself, trying to keep warm.

She opened the new pull-up and stepped into it, drawing it up her body. The elastic top clung to her waist, giving her a snug fit as she looked herself over in the mirror. Tiny, feminine prints decorated the front of it, making Kris blush slightly as she rubbed her fingers over them. She moved around a little, and found that her pull-up still felt like a diaper, which was a very good thing in Kris’s book, especially when she felt the soft padding rubbing against her. She turned around and looked over her shoulder at her reflection. After a few moments, she decided that her diapered tush actually looked pretty good as far as she was concerned.

She walked over to her nightstand and opened her bottle of baby powder, and poured a generous proportion into the front of her diaper. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling as the slightly cool powder touched her skin, soothing away a little of the rawness from wearing her wet diaper for so long. She reached down and gently rubbed the powder in, enjoying every stroke of her hand. She looked at her bed thoughtfully for a few seconds, but the bag laying on the floor pulled her thoughts away from that desire. With one last rub with clenched thighs, Kris knelt in front of the bag and began rifling through the contents. She felt her excitement, and blushes, grow as she picked up and looked at everything.

After taking everything out, Kris took stock of the neat line of things in front of her. The first thing she selected was a tiny pacifier, still neatly encased in its plastic shell. She held it carefully, worried about breaking it somehow. She chided herself for being so silly, but still held it gently in her hands as she looked at the packaging. She felt her breath quicken as she looked over the paci itself, and read the instructions on the back. She slowly pulled the cardboard off the back, and slowly drew it out. She looked at it for a few seconds, turning it over in her hands. It was outside was made from a pink plastic, with tiny purple flowers adorning the front. A large, matching purple ring was hanging down on the front side, with a tiny yellow nipple on the other. Kris slowly leaned forward as she opened her mouth, feeling the rubber nipple gently slide into her mouth. Kris shuddered a little at the first taste, but it faded from her tongue after a few seconds. She closed her eyes as she sucked contently, letting the feelings carry her away. After a few moments, she opened her eyes, letting the paci rest in her mouth as she looked at the other items.

The next thing she picked up was a baby bottle. It was in see through, pink plastic, with lines etched in that marked fluid ounces. Kris blushed as she held it up, memories of her baby dream coming back to her. Remembering the moment the nipple was slipped into her mouth brought a warm sigh as she opened the package containing the bottle. Kris glanced at her door and wondered how difficult it would be to get a little milk, but decided that enough had passed tonight between her and Mary.

Kris blinked as she picked up the next item. She had stared at it when she first took it out of the bag, but seeing it a second time didn’t lessen the shock. Kris had somehow completely missed Ellen picking out this item and slipping it into the small hand basket at Walmart. Kris held up a baby thermometer up to the light, a deep blush turning her face to a dark crimson. She knew how baby thermometers were used, and if she needed confirmation, the tiny jar of KY jelly at the end of the line of items seemed like good proof. She clenched her cheeks together reflexively, protecting her behind. She shook her head, not knowing what Ellen was thinking in buying that. “That thing is never getting in me,” Kris thought to herself. For some reason though, she didn’t throw out the thermometer, and instead placed it in her nightstand beside the bed.

The next item brought a fit of giggles to Kris as she examined it. She held up a small plastic hanger, that had a snow white bib hanging from it. It had a thin, red border encircling it, and a few words etched into the front. Kris looked at it doubtfully for a few seconds. She didn’t think the tiny straps would reach around her neck, and if it did, it would probably feel like she was being strangled. She turned the hanger so she could see the front, and a small eep escaped her pacifier as she looked at it. In a tiny semi-circle around the bottom, the words ‘Mommy’s Little Girl’ were stitched in. A tiny picture of Minimouse was sketched at the end of the words, with her being seen in a highchair with a small smile. Kris smiled for a second, thinking that the words were the real purpose behind the bib. She smiled behind her nooky, wondering what Ellen had thought about all of this.

The last item, outside of a small set of baby wipes, was a tiny rattle. Kris wasn’t sure why, but the rattle just seemed to captivate her. The first thing Kris noticed was that it wasn’t packaged, which surprised her. She held the end with her thumb and index finger, gently shaking the rattle and giggling at the soft sounds that poured out. The rattle itself was painted white, with tiny balloons in all sorts of colors adorning it. A bow of dark purple was tied in the middle, just above a little cross piece. Along the crosspiece, ‘Congratulations’ was written. Kris turned it over a few times, looking at the inscription, amazed that it had come from Walmart.

Kris felt a yawn escape past her pacifier, and a quick glance at the clock told her that it was time for bed. She quickly gathered up all the items and placed them in her nightstand, feeling her eyelids start to droop a little. After taking her blouse off, she folded back her sheets, and slipped in between them, only pausing to pick up her teddy bear to bring him under the covers too. She giggled when she felt her pull-up slide along the dark red satin sheets she had selected for this week. With another deep yawn, Kris curled up in a ball with her teddy bear in her arms, the sound of her gently sucking carrying her off to sleep.

Kris awoke the next morning, feeling more relaxed then she had felt in a long time. Her paci had fallen out sometime during the night, and laid underneath the sheets in front of her chest. Kris stretched her legs as she picked up the nooky, and let out a long yawn that ended with her lips closing around the nipple once again. She sucked quietly for a few minutes, before the time finally drove her out of bed. She took in the sight of herself, and was surprised when she thought a child was looking back at her. She shook her head, wondering what she was thinking and what was going on with her. In the end, she just shrugged a little bit, thinking that it was all do to the pacifier covering her lips, and nothing but a pull-up covering the rest of her. It was starting to get late, so Kris quickly jumped in the shower and got herself ready for day. After toweling off, she looked at the package of pull-ups resting on the ground.

“What am I getting myself into?” Kris said out loud to the room. After a few seconds of thinking, she grabbed a new pull-up and slid it up her body until it covered her. She pulled on a pair of tight jeans, testing the pull-ups a little as she wiggled a little. She was amazed at how quiet these were compared to her diapers, and how you couldn’t really tell by looking at the jeans either.

“Well, I guess no diaper lines are a good thing, huh?” she said to herself with a giggle. She finished off her outfit with a college sweatshirt, a warm, pretty loose top for the day. After grabbing the rest of her things, Kris walked slowly out to the common room, wondering what Mary had thought about last night. Kris breathed a sigh of relief when a few dishes resting in the drainer said that Mary had already come and gone. She grabbed a quick breakfast bar out of the pantry, which she ate slowly as she finished getting ready for work. She picked up her purse as she walked by the couch, and stopped suddenly as she looked at the door.

Written on a piece of notepad paper were the words “Kris, we need to talk tonight. Come home after work.” Kris felt a few tiny beads of perspiration form on the top of her forehead, wondering what Mary wanted to discuss. She took a deep breath and headed out of the door, hoping that it was going to be a long day.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 31 - Subtle Pressure

Kris felt as though her day flew by. Anytime she had a few seconds to herself, she found her mind wandering about what Mary had to talk to her about. Her imagination was spinning out ideas, each more outlandish than the last. Her favorite so far was a scenario that featured Jay as a prince in disguise, who was coming to whisk Mary off to a secluded, tropical island. Kris thought he might spring for a lifetime supply of diapers for her too! Kris giggled to herself, always feeling silly for her love of those kind of things. The most frightening one involved Mary running off and telling all their college friends about Kris’s new hobbies. She didn’t mind her diapers any more, but that didn’t mean she wanted the whole world to know about them! Or about her attraction to Court. The funniest one was one of Mary confessing that she was jealous of Kris and wanted to wear diapers too. Kris nearly feel on the floor giggling over that image, and knew that wasn’t going to happen!

There was one vision that kept creeping in though, no matter how many times Kris pushed it out of her mind. The one where Mary, after deciding that Kris went too far last night and needed help, dragged her off to a mental institution. Kris kept shaking her head to try and get the idea out, even as it became more and more elaborate, to the point that Matt was suddenly a psychiatrist in disguise who had been studying Kris those two nights. She laughed at herself, and went back to work, trying to keep images of restraints and needles out of her mind.

“At least I know Mary is okay with my diapers,” Kris mumbled to herself, “so I guess it’s silly to worry about her doing something, huh?” She took a deep breath, which caught in her throat as she turned and saw Sam waiting in the doorway.

“What did you say Kris?” Sam asked leisurely.

“Oh, nothing. Just talking to myself. I’ve had a rough week,” Kris said slowly as she watched Sam. Memories of him touching her crept back in, and Kris had to fight to stop of shuddering. She felt her backbone stiffen under his gaze though, refusing to let him see her upset.

“Oh, okay then,” Sam said with a small smile. “You know, I am really sorry about what happened. I thought it was what you wanted though.”

Kris felt her mouth drop open for a second before she hastily closed it. “What I wanted?” she thought sourly. “He’s got to be kidding me.” She knew that was a pretty standard line though, and swallowed her anger as she walked past him. A small ‘hmph’ escaped her as she left the door though, with Sam still smiling the entire time.

Kris made an effort to forget about Sam as she dove back into work, still seething a little from his statement. With a little careful planning, and a little more alertness on her part, Kris was able to avoid him for the most part during the rest of the day. She felt a small dance of butterflies start in her tummy as the kids were slowly picked up by parents, each one being a silent (and sometimes not so silent) reminder that the talk with Mary was coming closer.

Kris made quick work of picking up the play room, even though she winced every time she bent down to pick up a toy. She had managed to avoid wetting her pull-up so far during the day, but knew that probably wouldn’t last long into the drive home. As if reading her thoughts, Kris felt a tiny push between her legs, that she clamped down on, not wanting to risk a wet spot on her pants. She practically flew past Helen on her way out the door, using Sam as a weak excuse for her rushing about. Helen gave her a sympathetic pat as she walked by, which brought a warm feeling to Kris. It only lasted a moment though, with Kris worrying about having a different sort of warm feeling if she didn’t leave soon.

After waving to a few kids who were enjoying the playground with their parents, Kris jumped in her car and took a deep breath, and made an effort to stop her leg from shaking. She could practically see herself dancing around if she was standing up. After a few seconds, she felt a tiny spray of warmness start to spread through her pull-up, as a relieved sigh escaped her lips. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, enjoying the blissful feelings that were going through her. As she wet, she noticed a strange sensation on the back of her thighs. She reached down, and gasped when she felt dampness on her clothes. She quickly clamped her legs to stop the flow, and felt a dark blush spread across her face. She lifted her leg to survey the damage, and stopped when she felt a little more wetness escape the elastic leg band. Knowing it was really too late to do anything, Kris grabbed an old beach towel from the back seat and put it under her soaked pants, hoping that her car seat wasn’t drenched. With a quick turn of her keys, Kris started the short drive home, laughing at her stupidity the whole way.

When she pulled into the parking lot and shifted off her seat, she felt a little more wetness soak into her clothes. She reached into the backseat of her car and pulled out one of her beach wraps, which she quickly tied around her waist as she stood up. She shuddered a little when she saw a small dark patch appear between her legs instead of on the seat of her pants. She gave herself a quick once over, hoping she didn’t look completely idiotic wearing a beach wrap over her pants. After bending over slowly to avoid any more leaks, Kris picked up her purse and started an agonizingly slow climb to her apartment. She took a deep breath when she reached her door, relief spilling over her as she went inside, giggling to herself.

“Hello Kris, I’m glad you listened and came home,” she heard Mary say from the couch. Kris shook her head for a second. Mary wasn’t usually home this early. Slowly, the shock eased up, and Kris looked up to see Mary gracefully standing up in front of the couch. Kris’s eyes went wide for a second as she noticed the other person sitting on the couch.

“Hi Mary, hey Jay,” Kris stammered out, trying to pull herself together. It didn’t help that felt the damp patches on her pants, each one a reminder of her current state, and seeming to scream that she was in trouble. “Why are you here today Jay?”

“I get out of classes pretty early on Thursday, and only have one class tomorrow that I decided to skip so I could visit this weekend,” Jay replied with a smile.

“And I came home from work so I could spend some time with him,” Mary replied. “And also so I could have a little talk with you.” Mary’s eyes took on a slightly intense look, reminding Kris of a falcon zeroing in on something. Kris dropped her eyes under Mary’s look, feeling perfectly happy to be studying the carpet in front of her.

“Well, give me a few minutes and we’ll talk in my room?” Kris replied calmly. She hoped Mary didn’t notice that she was clutching the beach skirt in both hands. When Kris realized it, she made a visible show of smoothing it instead.

“No, we can talk here.” Mary replied coolly.

“In front of Jay?” Kris said sounding surprised. She realized that she made a mistake in saying his name loudly, making it sound more like a whine than a question. She took a deep breath, trying to remember that she was trying to remain calm.

Mary took another step forward towards her, and Kris almost started fumbling with the door handle to give herself a little more room between them. “It doesn’t matter if he hears, stop being sulky,” Mary replied, as Kris felt her face warm a little.

“Well, what do you want to talk about?” Kris asked casually.

“You,” Mary answered, “and how things are going to be here from now on.” Kris winced when Mary emphasized going, and felt anger start to build a little. Who was Mary to be talking to her like this?

“Oh, and how is that exactly?” Kris said with a little heat in her voice. She drew herself up as her eyes met Mary’s, straining for every inch of height.

Mary smiled as Kris’s head came up, but the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Well, I see the attitude is in full force today, like it has been for the past two weeks.” Kris felt the anger start to bubble again as she met Mary’s stare for all she was worth. “You’re complete rudeness last night was the last straw with you, trying to make a guest feel uncomfortable. Matt was only being courteous to you the other night. On top of that, since we found out about your diapers,” Mary said with a quick glance at Jay," you haven’t picked up the common room once, the dishes and kitchen have been atrocious, and it doesn’t look like you’ve cleaned your room once."

Mary’s words came out with an air of completely seriousness, and Kris couldn’t help but back up until she was against the door, lowering her eyes a little. She held on to her anger though, still wondering where Mary had the right to critique her like this. “So? I’ve been busy.”

“Don’t be snippy with me young lady,” Mary growled in a soft tone that made Kris’s hair stand on end. “Well, since you’re obviously acting like a child as usual instead of admitting to doing something wrong, I guess I’m going to have to get used to treating you that way. Since you can’t seem to take care of your room or the apartment, I guess you can’t take care of yourself either. Which means that I expect you to be in diapers all the time from now on while in the apartment, and I can hardly expect you to be trusted to change them.”

Kris felt numb with shock for a second. Oh all the things she expected, this wasn’t one of them. For a moment or two, she thought about what it would be like, but quickly shook her head to clear the thought. “No! I’m a grown woman Mary, and I won’t allow this. I’m perfectly able to take care of myself. If I want someone to change my diaper, it’ll be when I say!”

“Is that what you really want though Kris?” Mary thought silently to herself. Kris’s eyes dropped to the floor again, all but giving Mary an unspoken answer. “Oh, can you now little girl?” Mary said in a rough tone. Mary reached down and pulled the knot Kris had used to tie her beach skirt. Kris turned bright red as the brightly colored skirt dropped to the floor, showing her wet pants off to both Mary and Jay. Kris felt tears start to well up in her eyes as the two looked on, fighting to keep them from spilling down her face. Mary gave a confirming nod as if she knew what to expect, while Jay’s mouth hung open in obvious surprise. “Think about the position in you’re in right now Kris, and we’ll talk a little more tonight. Until then, don’t move from that spot and don’t even think about touching your pants. If you do, I’m going to be really disappointed in you.”

Mary spun on her heel and headed towards her room, motioning Jay to follow her. Kris felt herself sag against the door, slowly falling until she rested on the floor, her arms feeling heavy as she moved them. The tears she had managed to hold back overwhelmed her, a few escaping to slide silently down her cheeks. She thought about what Mary said, and the dam broke as grief overwhelmed her. She started bawling on the floor, holding the beach skirt in her arms as she tried in vain to dry her eyes. Sobs broke through as she tried to breath, wondering over and over again why Mary was treating her this way. She cried for what seemed like forever, when a loud knock on the door caused her to pull herself together. Still conscience of her wet state, Kris drew the skirt around herself again as she opened the door, gasping at who was waiting on the other side.

“You do that so well,” Jay said musingly.

“What so well?” Mary asked softly as she listened by the door. Her heart broke as she listened to Kris sobbing, wanting nothing more then to go comfort her friend.

“Act like a complete bitch,” Jay said with a smile. “The only other time I’ve seen you with that kind of attitude was during finals in college.”

“Gee, thanks. I hate doing it, but sometimes you have to, ya know?” Mary said. Even knowing she had her best interests at heart, Mary regretted the words she had spoken.

“I suppose,” Jay replied. Mary was glad he had made the trip down, not wanting to go through this without a little support. Besides, it helped Kris feel a little more awkward, which was to the better. Not to mention that she had a leaky pull-up on. Mary couldn’t believe how lucky she was sometimes.

“Well, hopefully with me brandishing a sword in front of her, she won’t notice the dagger slipping in,” Mary replied in casual tones.

Mary heard the door to the apartment open a few minutes later and couldn’t help but smile.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 32 - Trapped

Kris looked up timidly as Matt walked inside the apartment and closed the door. She gasped when he took one look at her and enveloped her in a tight hug. Matt’s strong arms held her tight against him, and Kris sagged against his chest, clutching him as if to keep herself safe for the time being. Strong hands gently rubbed the back of her head for a few seconds, as soft whispers drifted down to her ears. She closed her eyes as she lost herself in the rhythm of his breathing, feeling calmer than she was.

After a few minutes, Matt pulled away from her. She looked up into his eyes, as one of his large hands nimbly brushed aside a few stray hairs. She shivered a little, not knowing whether it was the chill in the apartment or his hands touching her that was causing it. The apartment was cold, she decided, her wet pull-up making her feel like a pile of ice cubes had been poured into her panties. She stepped back from Matt’s hands for a second, as she tried to center herself. He was a bit more dressed up today, wearing black pants with a brilliant white button down shirt, with two onyx cufflinks holding the cuffs closed. A deep crimson tie was around his neck, and a black blazer hung open. His black dress shoes shined up at her, making soft taps whenever his foot came down on the small area of tiles in front of the door.

“Anything I can do to help, little girl?” Matt asked softly, still looking, peering actually, at Kris’s eyes. Kris shuddered a little, remembering how Mary had called her that only a short time ago in a demeaning way. She didn’t feel that from Matt though. The way he said it made it sound like an endearment between friends.

“Oh, we just had another fight,” Kris replied sourly. “I was just sitting out here thinking about it.”

“Poor girl,” Matt replied quietly. “Come sit down on the couch with me and we’ll talk about it.” Matt slowly guided Kristine across the room, smiling at the way she dragged her feet in front of him. “Just sitting here and thinking, or told to?” Matt wondered to himself. He suspected that her reluctant feet were a good indicator of which was true.

He also glanced at the long beach skirt that was tied loosely around her hips. He would have guessed that it was hiding a diaper from view, but the little bit of her ankles that weren’t covered showed a pair of pants on underneath. Matt smiled to himself, wondering how many times he would get to see her cheeks redden before she figured out that being seen in a diaper wasn’t a big deal, wet or not. When they reached the couch, Matt watched Kris try to sit down very gingerly, noticeably trying to keep weight off of her bottom. The pieces slowly started to come together, and Matt couldn’t help but smile. He hoped Kris took it for a sympathetic smile, rather then one of mischievous glee.

“So what happened?” Matt asked, laying a comforting hand on top of Kris’s.

Kris shook her head slightly before answering in quiet tones. “I’m not really sure. Mary just seems to always be upset with me lately. I guess I’ve had a lot going on with everything, and haven’t really paid much attention to the apartment, but still. She doesn’t have a right to order me around!” Kris blushed when she realized her voice had gotten continuously louder as she went on. “I just don’t know what she expects of me, or what she thinks she has the right to tell me to do,” she continued in a more moderate voice. At least she hoped it sounded moderate.

Matt squeezed her hand slightly. “What did she tell you to do?”

Kris took a deep breath, feeling exasperated for a moment. “I think she’s decided that since I don’t appear to be able to take care of the apartment, that I can’t take care of myself,” Kris began while shaking her head in disbelief. “So, anyway, she decided that diapers at night weren’t enough now. Now, I’m supposed to wear them twenty-four seven, and only have them changed by an ‘adult’,” Kris said, emphasizing the last word to show that she was considered no such thing. “All I know is that I won’t be forced to do anything I don’t want to do.”

Matt watched her as she spoke with an impassive face, but he loved the look she gave when she decided to dig in her heels. Her eyes just seemed to sparkle with intensity when she had something to fight against. “That’s understandable,” Matt began neutrally, “but it doesn’t seem like she’s demanding too much. It seemed like the other night that you had already decided to wear diapers all the time anyway.”

“Pull-ups actually,” Kris said absently, “but the choice is mine.”

“You’re right of course,” Matt said while leaning over and pulling her back against his chest, which she didn’t fight at all. Or even appear to notice for that matter! “Have you thought at all about Mary’s terms and accepting her authority or not?”

Kris blinked for a moment, and Matt smiled seeing that he had caught her off guard. “No, I wouldn’t. I won’t be brow beat into something like this, and think it’s ridiculous that she made these apparent orders.”

“What if it wasn’t a demand?” Matt asked, feeling his heart beat a little faster. “What if someone offered to take a little of that self control, someone that cares about you and your well being? Accept their authority and trust that they’re doing what’s right for you?”

Kris just leaned against his chest with her eyes closed. After a minute or so, a small sigh escaped her as her mouth moved silently, as if she was trying to form her answer but couldn’t quite put it to words. Matt thought she looked a little distant, like a lost puppy searching for home. “I really don’t know,” she began, sounding uncertain. “With everything that has happened though, I think… I would. I don’t really understand what has been happening with me lately, but I just seem to be drifting a little, and chasing after something that I can’t describe. I haven’t felt this lost in a long time, and think I would.” Kris’s eyes grew as she realized what she had said, and looked up at Matt with eyes that said it was all his fault. She sagged back against his chest again, feeling as if she couldn’t move a muscle if she wanted to.

“Then I accept little girl,” Matt whispered. Matt felt her stiffen for a second, but after a few moments, her body went limp again as she rested against him.

Matt began lightly brushing her hair, soft, to get her a little more used to his touch before going on. He let a small, satisfied smile spread across his face, which was just starting to show a little of a five o’clock shadow. “Not one word of protest,” he thought silently to himself. That had been a shocking surprise, pleasant as it was. He expected her to at least make any number of excuses for her words, or to at least deny what she meant. Here she was though, drooped against him, looking as if all the fight was out of her finally. He could see her shivering a little, and he lightly rubbed the outside of her arms to warm them up.

“I promise to take good care of you Kris,” he said softly by her ear, which was answered with a content sigh. “I think the first thing you definitely need is a change.” He felt her tense up for a second, but quickly leaned herself back against him.

Matt slowly slid away from Kris, until she was laying on the couch, looking like she was wrapped up in a dream. He walked to her room and quietly opened the door. He rifled under the bed for a few moments, glad that Mary had thought ahead enough to tell him where she kept her supplies. He pulled out one of the crisp, new diapers from the package, feeling his pulse quicken as he looked at it. Matt loosened the tie a little bit, not sure why he was suddenly feeling warm. “I’ve diapered someone before,” he told himself, “just never someone over the age of three!” He thought briefly about looking around for some powder, but decided that he didn’t want to violate her space too much today.

When he walked back into the common room, he saw Kris curled up in a little ball on the couch, still shivering slightly. He knelt by the couch and brushed his hands through her hair again, a little stronger this time so she would feel them. She looked over at him, her eyes still showing an unsure look, as if asking him if she was safe there with him. After a few seconds, she closed her eyes and moved her head along with his hand when it brushed through her hair, bringing a little more calm to her.

“I’m going to change your diaper now little one,” Matt said with a little touch of sternness as if to emphasize that it was going to happen. “Do you want anything before I do?”

“May I have my pacifier please?” Kris asked with a little hint of need. For all that her body was that of a young woman, she looked every inch a baby reaching out for comfort.

“Of course little one,” Matt answered. “Where is it?”

“I think it’s in my bed somewhere, I think,” Kris said with a slight blush. Matt stood up and walked quickly back to her room, not wanting to the lose the moment he had Kris in. He actually found the pacifier on her nightstand, and smiled as he washed it off really quickly in cool water from her bathroom. Kris had her eyes closed when he returned, but a little tickle under her chin got her to open her mouth enough to slip the nipple in. She eagerly started sucking on it when she closed her mouth, and looked up at him with a happy gleam in her eyes. He brushed the top of her hair again for a few seconds, which she happily accepted with closed eyes and a lazy grin.

“Okay baby, time to have a dry diaper I think before you get a rash,” Matt said quietly as he untied the knot holding the beach skirt up. He was surprised by the wet spots that greeted him when he opened the skirt, and saw a small tear fall from Kris’s eyes to the couch. “And I’d bet you’d like a dry diaper, wouldn’t you? It’s not your fault that they leaked honey, just too much wetness. I’ll take care of that though, don’t worry at all.”

Matt watched her visibly relax as he spoke, trying to make his voice sound strong and confident. The tears dried up as quickly as they formed, making him glad he could act much more sure of himself than he actually was doing this. He unbuttoned her pants as if he did this every day, trying to avoid having her see him as anything other than a parent changing a wet diaper. The sucking slowed for a second as he pulled the zipper down, but resumed after he rubbed her belly for a second while humming a wordless tune. He tugged down her pants, enjoying the feel of her skin as he pulled them down. Her skin felt like soft silk to him, and as smooth and silky as a rose petal. She closed her legs a little as he pulled off the pants, squeezing the diaper covering her middle.

“We don’t want any more leaks now little girl,” Matt said calmly as he slowly drew her knees apart. “There isn’t a changing pad to keep the couch dry.” She didn’t put up any resistance, but eyed him for a second with a wondering look, before laying back down with a few soft sounds escaping her pacifier as she sucked.

He drew her knees up so that her feet were resting on the couch, making her diaper fully accessible. After rubbing her belly for a few more seconds, Matt began slowly taking the pull-up off, trying to avoid looking at the beautiful woman he had laid out in front of him. Kris paid no more mind to being partially naked in front of him then when he pulled down her pants, leaving him shaking his head in wonderment. He quietly unfolded the new diaper, and slid his hand just under her bottom to lift her up. A small gasp was the only sound outside of quiet sucking that he heard as he placed the new diaper underneath her. He set her down with a smile, still quietly humming a random tune. He regrettably pulled the diaper up between her legs, and taped it up with an expert’s touch.

“There you go little girl,” Matt said as he patted the top of Kris’s new diaper. “See, not so bad, was it?” Kris didn’t respond, but just kept sucking as she looked up at him. He pulled a blanket off of the back of the couch and laid it on top of her, hoping that she would warm up soon. Matt sat back on the couch just above Kris’s head, and gently started rubbing her hair again, whispering soft words to her. After a few minutes, Kris lifted her head onto Matt’s lap, curling on her side with the blanket wrapped tight around her.

“Get some rest baby girl,” Matt said as he lightly kissed her ear. “I know this has been a lot to take in, so have some wonderful dreams for a little bit.”

Kris drifted off to sleep pretty quickly, with only a few tiny yawns interrupting her nursing on the pacifier. She slept so peacefully that she never heard the door to Mary’s room open, or the soft feminine hands that brushed the side of her face as she slept. Or Matt’s quiet whispers of ‘thank you.’

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 33 - A Symbol

Kris woke with a sleepy yawn, letting her arm stretch out above her. Her pacifier had fallen out at some point, and was currently resting on the floor by the couch. She snuggled into her pillow for a second, not wanting to really wake up. Slowly, recognition started to dawn on her, as memories started slowly coming into focus. She rolled onto her back and looked up, and saw Matt smiling down at her. A warm smile spread across her face as she arched her back, lost in the silent art of yawning and stretching. “Good morning,” she mumbled. “How long did I sleep for?”

“Only an hour and a half princess,” Matt replied. “You barely moved a muscle the entire time. I guess you were pretty exhausted after your day, huh?”

“Uh huh,” Kris answered with a smile. “Thank you for changing me,” Kris said with a slight blush, still not quite believing that it wasn’t all a dream.

“You don’t have to say thank you for that baby, it’s what parents do,” Matt said lightly. “Along with other things sometimes,” he finished with a wink.

Kris was about to ask what he meant, when the thought flew out of her head. Mary stood over the back of the couch, looking down where Kris was still laying in Matt’s lap. She consciously tugged the blanket over her, remembering that she was only covered by a diaper and blouse. Her face seemed to be saying that she had been thinking about things, but something else shone in her eyes, something Kris couldn’t quite place.

“Good morning Krissy,” Mary said, as Kris winced at the extra letters on her name. “I just wanted to say that I was sorry about earlier. I was just a little upset, and wanted to make sure that you were okay. I love you, you know.” Kris looked up and saw that her eyes had softened a little, showing a slight gleam that said she was teary.

“That’s okay Mary, I get bitchy sometimes too,” Kris said with a laugh.

“Don’t use that kind of language baby, it’s impolite,” Matt broke in.

Kris looked up at him, sure her face all but screamed a reply of ‘yeah, so?’. Instead of saying that though, she felt her face warm a little as she mumbled something that could be taken for ‘I’m sorry.’

“That’s a good girl,” she heard Matt say, in a smooth voice that just seemed to gently caress her. “Why don’t the three of us sit down to have a small bite to eat? I think we need to discuss a few things.”

“Like what?” Kris asked quizzically.

“Just things that every little girl needs,” Matt replied casually. He rubbed Kris’s head for a second before sliding out from underneath her, smiling the whole time. He shared a quick look with Mary, feeling amazed that everything worked as well as they had conspired.

Kris stretched one last time before rolling off the couch, clutching the blanket around her. She only got a few steps before she heard Matt say “Leave the blanket on the couch baby.” Kris looked between the two of them for a moment, and then let the blanket fall to the floor with an exaggerated shrug. She started towards the kitchen again, smiling as she felt the soft padding rub between her legs.

Matt glanced back at Mary again, the two of them still smiling to each other. “Proud of her diapered behind, isn’t she?” Matt said in a whisper as Mary walked past, with a definitive nod showing that Mary agreed.

After a few minutes, the three were seated around a table, with Mary and Matt both drinking glasses of soda, while Kris somehow ended up with only a little poured in a plastic disposable cup, which she refused to touch until she was given a glass as well. Every few minutes, she would feel a protest rising up, but it would die down every time she looked up at where the two were sitting. They both sat together on the other side of the table, looking like a pair of wolves that spotted dinner. As Kris looked down at herself, she realized that she was definitely dinner, feeling very exposed to them as she sat there in her diaper with her legs bare. She didn’t mind them seeing her diaper now per say, but something to make her feel at least a little more adult would have been helpful she thought.

She went back to just sitting there twiddling her thumbs, and every once in a while taking an unconscious sip of the soda. She would shake her head every time she picked up the cup, and glared at the pair silently talking on the other side of the table. She kept silent though, remembering the last time she tried to speak. She was ‘shushed’ almost before she started speaking, the pair both turning to look over at her. Mary arched an eyebrow at her, and Matt just regarded her silently until she slumped back in the chair as the two went back to their conversation. She thought of getting up and leaving, but stopped herself on a few occasions. “I just want to say good night to Matt, that’s it,” Kris thought to herself as she once again caught herself drinking from the tiny cup in front of her. She sighed as she once again slumped into her chair, resigned to the fact that she’d have to wait.

She started when she looked up and realized the two were talking to her, and caught something about overactive imaginations. She looked over at Matt, and couldn’t stop the smile that came to her lips when he looked at her warmly. “I’m sorry,” Kris said bashfully, “I didn’t hear you.”

“What I said is that we have to talk to you about a few things Krissy,” Matt said with a little touch of amusement in his voice.

“What about?” Kris asked as she sat up a little straighter, trying to at least put herself on some level with Mary and Matt.

“Before you went to sleep, we talked and you said you’d like someone to take care of you, and someone to be in charge of you. I want to make sure that it wasn’t just a moment that you said that, before this goes any further. Will you be my baby?” Matt said in his deep voice that sent shivers through Kris. He wore no expression on his face, but Kris could swear that she saw an eager hope shining in his eyes, like a child waiting to open a present on Christmas morning.

Kris looked at the floor for a moment as she sifted through her feelings, trying to make sure that everything she felt earlier in the night was still there. She felt a little warmth in her middle when he spoke of her being his baby, and Kris couldn’t deny that. Or the warmth that she was feeling elsewhere. She closed her eyes before she answered, feeling a small weight lift off her shoulders as the words passed her lips. “I want to be your baby, Daddy.” When she opened her eyes, she saw both of them looking at her with warm, loving smiles. She started to giggle as her own smiled widened to match theirs, feeling giddy as she clapped her hands.

After a few seconds, Matt stood up and took something from Mary. Kris could see it was a long strip of a bright red velvet, cut on the ends to form a ‘V’, and maybe a half inch across. Matt slowly walked around her chair, gently using his hands to turn Kris’s face forward as he went behind her. She felt him gather up her hair at the nape of her neck, his long fingers nimbly holding it together. Kris could feel him pulling the ribbon around the tail, and deftly tying it. As the last bow was being pulled into place, she felt his lips kiss the top of her head. He walked back around, taking her hand as he walked back to his chair by Mary. She followed without a second thought, feeling a little light headed with everything that was happening. He sat down when he reached Mary, still holding tightly to Kris’s hand. He didn’t look like he was going to let go anytime soon, and Kris had to bend her back a little to hold on. She sank to the floor after a few moments, when her back started to ache a little from the strain. She felt Matt warmly squeeze her hand when she knelt in front of him, still visibly happy. Kris squeezed back strongly, feeling slightly euphoric, hoping that he felt half as happy as she did.

“What’s the ribbon for?” Kris asked shyly.

“It’s my way of saying that you’re my little girl,” Matt said sounding a little serious. “It’s a symbol of what we just talked about, and of you accepting this relationship, and accepting that you’re a baby, and I’m your parent. I’m not saying there won’t be adult moments, if that’s what we both want, but that will be something separate from this relationship. I’m your Daddy now little girl, and the ribbon you’re wearing is a mark of that. It’s also a gift that you can refuse at any time, but I hope that you wear it happily for a long time Krissy. Do you like it?”

“I love it Daddy,” Kris began, feeling a few tears in her eyes. “Thank you. Thank you so much!” Kris hugged his leg tightly, losing herself in the moment, and reaching around curiously to touch the soft velvet that binded her hair, but also binded her on another level, one she couldn’t describe. She didn’t care if she could or couldn’t though, she was feeling completely at peace, and that was all that mattered. She felt Matt’s fingers draw her face up, and he gave her a warm kiss on the cheek, one that said both 'you’re welcome little girl," and “I hope we both do want those adult moments.”

“I’m going to get you something a little more permanent soon baby,” Matt said quietly. “Just wanted to make sure you wanted it first. I’m glad you do.” His strong arms pulled her into a tight embrace, and Kris let herself be folded up next to him. She gave a start when she felt a tingle between her legs, feeling a need to wet suddenly. After a few seconds, she sighed and sank deeper against him, letting herself relax at the same time. She felt a little wetness start to soak through her diaper, and clutched Matt tighter. Kris closed her eyes and smiled, completely lost, feeling the warmth of her diaper with the warmth and safety of Matt’s arms around her. Kris couldn’t imagine where else she would want to be. After a few minutes, Matt slowly let Kris sit back down, smiling like a proud Daddy.

“What is it?” Kris asked curiously.

“You wet yourself, didn’t you?” Matt replied, still smiling. Mary’s eyebrows shot up for a second, but she quickly resumed a more unreadable face.

“Yes Daddy,” Kris said with a little giggle. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry for that, it’s what babies do silly girl,” Matt said with a loving smile. "I already changed one diaper tonight though. I think it’s your turn Mary.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 34 - The Price

Kris looked over to where Mary sat, her teeth showing from the smile she wore. Kris felt a little apprehensive, still remembering how Mary had tried to force her into having her diaper changed by an adult, as she put it. She watched Mary stand up, still smiling, but Kris could see she was a little unsure. She looked back up at Matt, feeling a little worried, which got her a reassuring pat on the head.

Mary stood over her a few seconds later, and held out her hand for Kris to take. After one last look at Matt, and one last quick hug, Kris slowly took Mary’s hand. She let Mary guide her up and take her over to the couch, where she laid down with her knees up in the air. Her heart was racing the whole time, and Kris couldn’t decide whether she was feeling happy about getting her diaper changed, or upset that Mary was doing it. She felt herself tighten up when Mary first started untaping her diaper. When she looked up, she saw Mary looking down on her with concern in her eyes. She lightly rubbed Kris’s tummy for a second, which made Kris shiver a little.

“Please forgive me Kris,” Mary said softly. “I really didn’t mean what I said, and would never force you to do something you didn’t want to do, or that I thought wasn’t in your best interests. I care about you, and want to see you happy, I swear.”

Kris didn’t answer, and instead just leaned back and let her body relax. Mary kept rubbing for a few seconds, a little bit stronger then she had earlier. Kris looked up again and saw Mary with a small grin, knowing that this was at least a partial acceptance of her apology. She took a few steps and plucked Kris’s pacifier off the couch. Kris listened as she walked to the kitchen, and heard a little running water before she came back. The pacifier slipped between her lips easily, a little warm from the water Mary had cleaned it off with. She smiled after sucking on her soother a few times, and heard Mary giggle a little as she went back to untaping her wet diaper. She shivered when the last tape fell away, and the cold air of the apartment tickled her private area. Mary smiled as Kris lifted her hips a little so Mary could pull the diaper out.

“Now, no wetting until you have another diaper on, okay baby?” Mary said with a little mirth in her voice.

Her only answer to the comment was to keep her butt firmly on the couch as Mary tried to put the new one underneath her, which made Kris smile in delight as Mary looked slightly vexed. It only took a few annoyed seconds for Mary to just put her hand under and lift Kris off the couch, enough to slip the diaper under her at least. Kris giggled at all of this, proud of her little act of defiance, as small as it was. Mary shot her a look that promised revenge in some form later on, which just made Kris giggle a little more. She was already in diapers after all, what else could they do to her?

As Mary finished powdering her and taping up her diaper, Kris fingered the velvet ribbon thoughtfully. It was long enough that she could pull it over her shoulder a little bit, and for some reason Kris enjoyed touching it. She started thinking about everything Matt had said over and over again, and got a warm feeling every time she thought about saying how she wanted to be his baby. Something about it just seemed natural to her, as natural as breathing. She smiled when she thought of how she had wet her diaper while in his arms, feeling completely like a newborn baby being held by her Daddy for the first time. That’s how she imagined a newborn felt like at least.

The feel of Mary’s lips on her tummy followed by a loud ‘Pppbbbbtttt’ sound snapped her back into reality, as she watched Mary just standing up from the raspberry she just received. Mary was grinning from ear to ear, and Kris was sure that it was part of the revenge she was promised. Mary broke out laughing as she looked at Kris, and she couldn’t help but join in. Mary’s laughter was always infectious, and either way she liked having her tummy blown on!

She heard Matt start to laugh a little too, and Kris sat up to look over at Matt. At Daddy. He really was a great looking guy, but somehow he seemed more than that now. She felt like she would do anything she could to please him, and knew that he would play with her and keep her safe. She was quickly falling in love with that idea, and even now missed having his arms around her. Kris stood up slowly, and then uncertainly hugged Mary in thanks for changing her diaper, even though she was still a little upset with her. Mary on the other hand hugged her fiercely, and Kris wondered how she could ever stay mad at someone who always seemed to care so much about her. After a few seconds, she was clinging to Mary as tightly as she was to her, both of them feeling entirely too emotional.

Matt watched all of this quietly, letting the two friends sort out their own relationship. After a few minutes of holding on to each other, the two exchanged quick kisses on the cheek before heading back to the table. Kris looked at her chair for a few seconds, but opted to sit on the floor near Matt again, feeling more comfortable there for some reason. She giggled when she felt the fresh diaper crinkle under her as she sat down with a small thump, and looked up to see Matt smiling at her.

“You are such a cute baby Krissy,” Matt said. “Isn’t she Mary?”

“Very,” Mary replied. “And a little bratty sometimes too!”

“I am not!” Kris replied, feeling her face warm a little.

“You are so,” Mary replied laughing a little. “You weren’t exactly helpful with getting a new diaper on!”

“That was for your comment that you said to me,” Kris said with a little heat in her voice, not finding Mary’s amusement very funny.

“Don’t be so snippy little girl,” Matt intervened. “You have to learn to be more respectful of adults.”

“Maybe when adults are more respectful of me,” Kris gibed.

“Listen baby, Mary didn’t say anything wrong. She spoke to a baby that was laying on the couch getting her diaper changed, and I for one am fine with that. I thought it was very cute in fact,” Matt said sounding a little serious. “This is a good time to go over a few things I think. I expect you to listen to Mary as you would me Krissy, and I’m also giving her permission to correct you if need be. From what I saw when you were getting your diaper changed, you’re comfortable with her, even if you may be acting a little sulky over what happened earlier.”

“I’m not being sulky!” Kris said in a near screech. “Daddies are supposed to protect you ya know.”

“They also have the job of raising a little girl the right way,” Matt said a little firmly. “When you accepted that you needed someone to care for you, you also accepted that you needed someone to help raise you as well, and I take that very seriously. I expect you to be a well mannered little girl, and there will be consequences if you aren’t. Now, I think you should apologize to Mary for what you said.”

“No!” Kris said quickly. “I didn’t do anything wrong.” Kris set her jaw stubbornly and glared up at Matt.

“I think you did, and what I say goes. Now, will you apologize?” Matt said, his voice sounding a little more chilled then earlier.

“No,” Kris said quickly. As soon as the word left her mouth, she felt Matt reach around and pull her up onto his lap. She gasped when she was lifted up, and felt a high pitched squeal escape her as she felt his hands holding her down. Her blouse from earlier had inched upward, and she could feel it bunched up under her arms. She tried to lift herself up, but couldn’t find a purchase on the floor for her feet to grab, and her arms were neatly pinned at her sides and feeling pretty useless. She tried pinching him at one point, but she didn’t even receive an answering grunt for her effort. After a few minutes of struggling, she settled down and felt resigned to her current position, and went about acting like it was where she wanted to be. No matter how hard she pretended though, she knew that she was stuck there like a girl caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

“Now, this is just a warning Krissy,” Matt said firmly once again. “Next time, your diaper will come down.” She felt Matt’s hand rub the back of her diaper for a second, and then a quick slap landed on the back of her right thigh, followed quickly by one on her left side. She gasped when the first hit, and then let out a tiny cry as the second landed and she felt her skin start to warm. “Now, do you have anything to say?”

Kris kept her lips closed, but gasped when she felt Daddy’s hand rubbing her diaper again. “I’m sorry Mary, I didn’t mean it,” she said in a rush, and breathed a sigh of relief when Daddy let her slide back to the floor again. She felt his hand stroke her hair for a second, and she gladly accepted the comfort. She was upset with herself for wanting it though, and it wasn’t much compensation for a pair of thighs that felt like they were on fire.

“Good baby,” Matt said in a warm voice. “See that wasn’t so bad. Just so you know though, Mary has my permission to the do the same to you, and I expect you to accept it as you would with me, is that understood?”

“Yes Daddy,” Kris mumbled, trying not to sound like she was pouting. She really didn’t want to risk any more swats for the night. She almost hated herself for wanting his praise though, and couldn’t make sense of why she felt such a sense of relief when he said she was a good baby. She tugged at the ribbon in her hair for a few seconds, feeling comforted that it was still there for some reason. Her eyes drifted downward for a few minutes as she thought about how she was punished, and decided that she didn’t mind him correcting her. It felt, right, to her for some reason. After a few minutes, she felt Daddies hands picking her up again, until she was resting in his arms with her diapered butt hanging between them. She put her arms around him and lightly kissed his cheek. “I love you Daddy,” she said to his ear, adding a small kiss to his ear lobe.

“Love you too baby girl,” Matt said with a wink. “But I think it’s bed time for you. You look exhausted and little girls need their rest.” He carried her easily in his arms as the crossed the threshold into her room, and he gently laid her down in the bed after Mary had pulled the covers back. He stuck a finger into the leg hole of her diaper before drawing the comforter back up, mumbling something about making sure she was dry before going to bed. Kris drifted off to sleep as he looked down at her, somehow being comforted that he was looking over her. He picked up her teddy bear and laid it in her arms, and then lightly brushed the top of her head with a kiss, followed by two more on her closed eyelids.

“Have beautiful little girl dreams angel, and we’ll talk about the rest of my new rules tomorrow after work,” Matt said as he closed the door to her room.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 35 - Morning Moments

Kris awoke with a start the next morning, quickly looking at her clock that read four thirty. She groaned softly to herself, upset with the dream that made her think it was later. She double checked her clock, and smiled when she saw that either Matt or Mary had set the alarm for her so she could get up for work the next day. With a quiet yawn, and a little effort, Kris rolled onto her tummy. She smiled when she felt the thickness of her diaper between her legs, the diaper that Mary had put on her a short time ago. She also felt a little pressure on her tummy, and a need to wet suddenly come over her.

She thought of getting up for a few seconds. Not to got to the bathroom, or so she told herself, but because she usually found it easier to wet when standing up. She felt her muscles protest when she started to lift herself up though, and after a few seconds of weak effort, she slumped back into the warm bedding, feeling the pressure a little sharper then before. She sat there for a few minutes, trying to will herself to relax, but not matter how badly she needed to, she couldn’t bring herself to wet while underneath her covers.

Kris tried a few more times, pushing herself to the point that she thought she would explode if she didn’t go, but only felt a tiny trickle of wetness dribble down her skin to the waiting diaper. Frustration was starting to build, and she was positive that her face was starting to turn red from it. She finally let out an exasperated breathe as she reached over and pulled her teddy bear into the crook of her arm, wondering what was going on. Closing her eyes didn’t help very much, and she pushed all thoughts of going back to sleep out of her head. She knew she could never manage to drift off to sleep while she was jiggling her feet with a need to pee!

“What’s wrong with me teddy bear?” Kris whispered to her furry bedmate. “I want to wet, and I like to in my diaper, but I just can’t for some reason.” She laughed at herself after taking a deep breathe, laying in bed and talking to a furry, bedside therapist. “Something about wetting in my bed just seems so… wrong. But I’ve wet myself a lot these past few weeks, and I’ve never really had an issue after the first few times, right?” Kris looked over at the bear still cradled in her arms, almost hoping for some kind of confirmation or something. “I guess I’m being silly huh? Matt and Mary said I was the baby of the house now for the most part, right? So what’s wrong with wetting at night? That’s what my diaper is for, right?” she said almost in a rush, feeling still a little surprised when she felt happy about being the ‘baby’ of the apartment.

She hugged her bear tightly, feeling him giving her reassurance. She went over the words in her head again and again, that it was okay to wet herself, no matter where she was. She felt like and was a baby, especially here in her room. Babies wet all the time. She kept reciting the words, and eventually started to whisper them to herself, feeling a little more at ease with each retelling. After a few minutes, she let her head fall back against the pillow, and felt herself let go finally as she felt her diaper start to grow warm. She pulled her bear back to her chest and hugged him tightly, saying a quiet thank you for taking care of her tonight. “There really is nothing like a teddy bear, is there?” she said to him, swearing that she felt him answer through a tiny squeeze of his own as she closed her eyes.

The alarm beeping woke her up this time, and Kris fumbled to turn it off as she fought to open her eyes. As soon as the beeping stopped, Kris sank back into her comforters, shying away from the cold air outside. She still felt a little dampness clinging to her skin, and smiled as she yawned softly, still folded up in her blankets. Her eyes started to drift downward again when she heard a soft knock on her door. Kris glanced over just in time to see the door start to creak open, and smiled shyly when Mary started to walk into the room. She was already dressed for work, sporting a pair of tight, black stretch pants with a white blouse that accented her shape almost perfectly while flailing out a little at the bottom. The top button was undone, showing a chain that held a tiny jeweled rose that rested against her skin. Kris pulled the covers up to her nose when she felt a rush of cold air come from the common room, and blushed slightly when Mary smiled at her.

“Morning little girl, how’d you sleep?” Mary asked still smiling. Kris felt a little agitation, both for Mary being in her room this early, and for making her pull down the covers so she could answer.

“I slept pretty well,” Kris replied quickly. “How about you?”

“Pretty good, I always sleep better when Jay is here for some reason,” Mary answered, her eyes momentarily sparkling. Kris giggled to herself, she always loved the sight of a woman in love.

“That’s good,” Kris replied, uncertain if she should ask her next question. “What are you doing?” she asked cautiously.

“Getting you ready for school of course,” she replied with a wry grin. “Well, you already know that you aren’t allowed to change your own diaper I think, but there are other things you have to get used to also. Babies don’t usually get to dress themselves either, or take baths alone. Matt wanted to make sure you were okay here when he wasn’t around, so I agreed to take care of you in the morning, and he’ll take care of you at night.”

Kris closed her mouth when she realized it was hanging open. She knew she should have expected this. Well, expected was too strong of a word. She should have at least figured it was a possibility. The surprise vanished as quickly as it had come, with Kris putting on a mask of quiet acceptance. She kept thinking of her words from last night, and decided that she’d live according to them as much as possible. In truth, she didn’t really see much of a downside to that.

“I don’t buy that innocent look for one second young lady,” Mary said as she pulled the covers down the bed. “When a little girl looks that angelic, it’s usually wise to make sure no sweets are missing from the kitchen. But usually a few swats on the butt help keep them in line. Most times anyway,” she said with a little emphasis on most. “Now, let’s get you ready for your morning bath.”

“Okay Mary,” Kris replied, as she stretched lazily on the bed.

“I was thinking about that Kris, and I don’t really think it’s appropriate for a little girl to call me Mary. I don’t really feel right using Mommy either, so I want you to call me Aunt Mary from now on, is that clear?”

“Yes Aunt Mary,” Kris said, almost automatically. She shook her head when she realized how quickly she answered, and looked away from where Mary was looking at her approvingly.

Mary walked to the bathroom, and a few seconds later Kris heard the sound of running water starting to fill the tub. After a few minutes, Mary came walking back in the room and laid a towel on the carpeted floor, motioning for Kris to come lay down. Kris shivered when she stood up, but set herself to being a good girl, and hopefully avoiding any of the swats on the butt that Mary had spoken of earlier.

“Have to wet any more before I change you baby?” Mary asked while kneeling down to help Kris. Kris thought for a second, and felt a little need to wet, but didn’t feel like doing it in front of Mary. It didn’t that she could already see her diaper, which was already soaked from her nighttime wetting.

“No Aunty,” Kris replied, but maybe a few seconds too late. Mary eyed her suspiciously, but Kris saw her drop it as she looked at the clock, no doubt worrying about getting the two of them to work.

She looked up at the ceiling as she felt Mary untape her diaper, smiling when she felt a little of dampness dry as the chilly air touched her. Mary didn’t let her enjoy the feeling for too long though, as a moist baby wipe helped to make her skin feel a little wet again. Kris happily lost herself in the feeling of her diaper being taken off, so much that she didn’t feel Mary starting to unbutton her blouse. She gasped when she felt Mary moving up her stomache, and drew herself back, practically crawling on her back till she leaning against her nightstand. She felt her heart racing as she pressed against the wood at her back, looking at Mary with slightly panicked eyes.

“What’s the matter baby,” Mary asked, sounding genuinely concerned. “We need to get that blouse off if you’re going to take a bath, and it’s not like you have anything I haven’t seen before!” Mary gave a small chuckle at the end, but Kris could tell that she was a little worried.

“Oh, it’s, nothing,” Kris said with a tiny stutter. She went over the words from last night in her head again, trying calm herself.

“Okay baby,” Mary said uncertainly. “Come back over and we’ll finish getting you ready for your bath.”

Kris reluctantly crawled back over to Mary, feeling almost on the edge of collapsing. She held her blouse tightly around her, and couldn’t quite bring herself to laying back down on the floor. Mary slowly came over to her, and very slowly started undoing the buttons again, with Kris starting to shake a little from it. Mary took a deep breathe, and quietly stood up and walked to the common room. A few seconds later, she came back holding Kris’s pacifier in her mouth. She slipped it into Kris’s mouth with a smile, and a small, reassuring rub on her shoulders. Kris felt the blouse start to fall from her shoulders, and felt a few tears slowly fall down her cheeks when the blouse fell past her upper arms, until finally dropping to the floor. She unhooked her bra quickly, and let that fall around Kris’s shoulders as well. She heard Mary draw in a deep breath when she looked at Kris, and gave Kris a soft hug from behind. Mary shook her head after letting go, and slowly stood up. Kris instinctively covered herself up, but whether she was covering her breasts or arms, she couldn’t say. She was shaking a little still, and visibly stiffened when Mary put her arms around her again.

“Are you okay baby?” Mary asked cautiously.

“Yes, I am,” Kris said almost automatically. “Please, can we just finish getting ready?”

“Okay baby girl, but you know we have to talk about this later,” Mary said.

“That’s fine,” Kris lied, but she wanted more than anything to be out of the room at the moment. She had never thought about this when they were discussing her being treated like a baby, but she very much wished she had. With visible effort, Kris composed herself as much as she could, and looked up at Mary uncertainly, wondering what she was thinking.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 36 - Choices

“Okay little girl, time for your bath,okay?” Mary said in almost a near whisper. Kris got up slowly, still holding her arms tightly. She walked to the bathroom where the tub was almost filled, and smiled when she saw all the bubbles on top. “I thought you deserved a bubble bath for your first day Krissy, so have fun with them. Can I trust you not to make too much of a mess while I go get your clothes ready?”

Kris was so intent on getting in the bath that she didn’t even answer. The water was really warm, and it took her a few tries to finally convince her bottom to sink underneath the water. Bubbles coated her skin, and she giggled as she started piling them on top of her head, laughing at the sight of herself in the mirror. She built a big mountain of bubbles in the middle of the tub, and laughed when she scooped some off the top and blew them throughout the bathroom. She heard a soft ‘tsk tsk’ just before she heard Mary’s footsteps on the tiled floor.

“So much for trusting you to keep the bathroom clean,” Mary said with a warm smile. She had the sleeves of her blouse pulled up, and her hair tied back. “I think there’s enough water on the floor for me to take a bath of my own! And with bubbles too, I might add!”

“I’m sorry,” Kris said bashfully, which Mary smiled at.

“It’s okay Krissy, it’s what little girls do afterall,” Mary replied. “Come on though, time to actually get you cleaned up for the day.”

Mary had Kris sit in the middle of the tub while she poured a little liquid soap into Kris’s poof. Kris breathed in the scent, letting it relax her. She always loved the smell of her raspberry soap, almost but not quite as much as the smell of baby powder. The poof always felt nice against her skin also, and Kris happily closed her eyes to enjoy the feel of it. Pretty soon though, she was standing up a little so Mary could wash her ‘special area’, which Mary exclaimed had to be well taken care of now to prevent any unpleasant surprises. Kris had to admit that she didn’t relish the idea of getting a diaper rash either, so happily submitted to the washing.

“Okay baby, close your eyes and tilt your head back, okay?” Mary said, with a hint of amusement in her voice.

Kris listened almost automatically, but didn’t expect to feel the rush of warm water that poured over her head. She straightened her neck, just in time to see Mary putting down a plastic pitcher and pouring a little of her shampoo into her hand. Mary didn’t waist any time in scrubbing her hair, being merciless as she tried to make sure she got all the hair. Kris shut her eyes tight, not wanting any soap in her eyes. When she was done, Kris tilted her head back again, still hoping to get away with no soap in her eyes. Mary dipped the pitcher in the water, and Kris held her breathe until she felt the rush of warm water again. Mary ran her hands through her hair, still scrubbing a little, while she refilled the pitcher again. After the second time, Kris felt something patting her forehead, and she gratefully clutched the little bit of cloth to her eyes to make sure no soap was there. She opened her eyes and saw Mary smiling down at her.

“Okay baby, bath time is done,” Mary announced as she gathered the tail of Kris’s hair in her hand and squeezed out some of the water.

“Mary, oops, Aunt Mary, I need some conditioner for my hair,” Kris said, very shyly after her mistake.

“Well baby, this is the only time you’re going to get a bath in the morning. From now on, Matt will probably be doing them at night. He’ll take care of that tonight, okay? We just thought that you’d need one this morning, especially after the day you had yesterday,” Mary replied. She reached in and unplugged the drain, and Kris felt her lip stick out a little in a tiny pout as the water started to empty. Mary gave her a warning look to not make a big deal about this, and Kris sulkenly stood up, feeling the water drip over down her. She covered her arms again, and breathed a sigh of relief when Mary brought a large towel over and draped it over her. Kris finished drying herself, along with her hair, and followed when Mary led her out of the bathroom by the hand.

“Well baby, we decided to keep you in pul-ups during the day, even though we think you probably need diapers after yesterday. I’m going to pack a few extras into your work bag incase you need a change at work, okay?” Mary said pretty matter of factly. “Come lay on the bed so we can finish getting you ready.”

Kris laid down in her usual position, with her bottom on the edge of the bed and her tippy toes just barely touching the floor. She spread her legs almost instinctly now, and Mary said ‘good girl’ as she rubbed a little baby oil over her skin. A sprinkling of powder came next, followed by her pull-up being tugged up her body. She stood up when Mary reached her knees, and felt it slide the rest of the way up her body until it covered her middle. She looked at her back, still glad that pull-ups didn’t give her as much of a poofy bottom as her regular diapers did. Next came a pair of old blue jeans, definitely a pair that Kris wouldn’t have picked. These were her ‘comfy jeans’, which meant that they rarely if ever saw the light of day. They were very loose and baggy, not the usual things Kris liked to wear at all. She also got a turtleneck sweater also, which was pretty when worn with the right things, but baggy jeans were definitely not in that category.

“May I have something else to wear Aunty?” Kris asked, not feeling very happy with how she looked.

“Well baby, if you want to pick out something, you can,” Mary said. “I’m not going to change you more then once though, so you’ll have to live with whatever you pick,” she added on, with a slight touch of a warning underneath.

Kris decided that she didn’t mind the top, but the pants definitely needed to be changed. She looked through her closet for a brief second before picking her usual pair of black stretch pants that she always wore with this sweater. The two combined always slimmed her waist and she always loved how her body looked in the outfit.

“I’d rather wear these today Aunty,” Kris said. “Thank you for letting me change.”

“You’re welcome baby,” Mary replied absent mindedly. “Are you sure you want this pair of pants?”

“Yes Aunty,” Kris replied quickly, wanting to get this over with.

“Okay then, if that’s what you want,” Mary said, and Kris could have sworn she was trying to surpress a smile.

Mary unbuttoned Kris’s jeans and helped her out of them. Mary playfully stuck a finger inside her pull-up for a second, joking about whether she was still dry or not. The pants were quickly pulled up her legs, and Kris happily finished tugging them in place while Mary buttoned them. Kris did a quick turn in front of the mirror, and gasped when she saw her backside. She could see just about every line from her pull-up through the thin fabric of her pants, and the lines looked nothing like a regular panty line. She looked down at herself and saw the same results in the front, especially where the padding started in her pull-up. She bent her knees a little, and gasped when the padding in her rear puffed out even more, making it all the more obvious that she was wearing some kind of thick undergarment.

“Oh Aunty, can I pick something else out,” Kris said while still studying herself. “I didn’t expect these pants to show off quite so much.”

“I’m sorry baby, but I told you that I could only change you once,” Mary replied. “Maybe this will be a nice lesson though, that sometimes parents know what’s better for you. You wanted these pants, so now you get to wear them.”

Kris looked up at her, feeling panic start to grow in her. “But, I can’t go to work this way,” she said in almost pleading tones. “Please Aunt Mary, let me pick something else! You have to!”

“Don’t tell me what I have to do baby, I don’t like that very much, and it’s not proper behavior,” Mary replied sharply. “You chose this, aware of the consequences, and you went ahead anyway. You have to learn somehow baby.”

“But Mary,” Kris began, and jumped when a sharp swat landed on her bottom.

“I won’t listen to any more of this Kristine,” Mary said. “Do you want me to tell your Daddy tonight?”

“No Mar… Aunty,” Kris replied sheepishly.

“That’s better. Okay, let’s go get something to eat so we can get you to school on time,” Mary said. She took Kris’s hand and led her to the kitchen, and Kris ate her bowl of cereal in silence. She wasn’t sulking, she told herself, just… reflecting. After finishing breakfast and brushing her teeth, Kris picked out a long, thin black raincoat to wear to work. She picked up her purse, glad that her spare pull-ups were in a zipped pouch, and flung it over her shoulder as she headed out of the apartment. Mary stopped her at the door though, and gave her a tight hug.

“Have a good day at school today Krissy, okay? And call me if you need anything. You know though, it’s not raining outside,” she finished with a slight wink. “I’ll let that slide though,” she said with a smile, “as long as I get a nice good-bye kiss.”

Kris reached up on her toes and gave a slight kiss to Mary’s cheek, smiling while she did it. “Thank you Aunty for my bath this morning, I hope you have a good day too.”

Mary was still shaking her head in wondermeant when she watched Kris’s car pull out of the apartment’s parking lot.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 37 - Work and Play

Mary spent a little bit out in the common room, trying to straighten up after last night. Diaper supplies were sitting all over the floor, along with a couple of white powder spots on the couch. She shook her head as she gathered everything up and put them away in Kris’s room, thinking that they definitely had to do something to make diapering her easier. She was as amazed by the changes in Kris’s room as in Kris herself. Instead of a tiny bottle of moisturizer on her nightstand, a bottle of baby oil was laying on its side with the cap closed. Her bed contained a couple more stuffed animals then she remembered, all neatly lined up along the pillows from when Kris made her bed. She took a deep breath, giggling to herself at the faint smell of baby powder that was lingering in the air.

After she finished tidying up the common room a little bit, along with the breakfast table, Mary looked over at her bedroom door, sure that Jay was still sleeping the morning away. She smiled inspite of herself. The two really were an odd pair, but that just seemed to enrich the relationship. The why and how of how they met still amazed Mary, along with how they managed to figure out that they shared a ‘common interest.’ When all was said and done though, for being pretty different, they had an amazing relationship, one that she hoped Jay loved as much as she did. She glanced at the door again, and the thought of Jay wrapped up in the blankets decided her. She picked up the phone and punched in a few numbers, smiling as she pretended to cough a few times.

A few minutes later, she happily sank back into the bed after putting on something a little more comfortable. The bed was incredibly warm from Jay, and Mary smiled as she tapped his shoulder so he’d move his arm so she could lay down with him. She snuggled into his side for a few minutes, and contently fell back asleep after getting a small kiss on the top of her head from him.

Kris arrived at school only a few minutes before the children were set to arrive. She made a vexed sound as she looked at the front of her pants, the pull-up she was wearing clearly showing through the thin fabric. She thought for a few seconds, and thought she could get away with claiming she was just wearing a really thick pad. That would bring its own set a questions though, at least from Helen, but Kris figured it was certainly better than the truth. For the first time in a while though, she was worried about the soft rustle that followed her as she walked, even though it wasn’t nearly as loud as a regular diaper.

The storeroom was empty fortunately, but Kris could see both Helen’s and Sam’s coats were neatly hung up on the hooks behind the door. She ended up keeping her coat on today, and shook her head when she realized that would bring its own line of questioning. There really wasn’t much of a choice though. It was going to be hard enough to convince Helen that the front was a pad, with no chance of her buying it if she saw the thick padding that covered her bottom. She took a few steps towards the door to the playroom, and felt her heart start to beat faster. That didn’t stop her though. She didn’t think much really could after the past few weeks and all she’d gone through.

Helen sat at one of the tiny tables in the playroom, working on scrubbing off a few leftover marks from yesterday. Kris giggled at the sight, even though she knew she should be used to it. Somehow though, the sight of Helen seated awkwardly on one of the children’s chairs always made her giggle. The rest of the playroom looked like it was all set up, with Sam just pulling out a few toys here and there and setting them on the floor. Kris lowered her gaze when she saw him look up, and hurridly sat down at the table with Helen, hoping to avoid him for a little while longer. She hoped she didn’t look quite as awkward as Helen.

“No, that wouldn’t be funny at all,” she muttered under her breath, still giggling a little.

“What was that?” Helen asked offhandidly, her forehead creased enough to say that she was getting frustrated. “We have to stop giving them free rein with the crayons, this is ridiculous!”

“Sorry miss,” Kris replied. “Want some help?”

“No, it’s okay,” Helen said, a little too quickly. "How are you doing today?

“I’m doing super,” Kris said, forcing a smile. “Slightly hormonal, but that’s nothing unusual!”

“That’s true,” Helen replied, once again a little too quickly.

“Hey!” Kris replied. “Geeze, love you too.”

“What? You said it,” Helen said with a smile.

Kris looked over through the playroom’s window and saw two cars pull in, probably the first two children of the day. “Ugh, Kris said quietly. I feel like I’ve been cursed this month. It’s the first time I’ve had to wear pads in ages.”

“Really?” Helen said, still sounding distracted by her scrubbig. “You should go get that checked out then if it’s unusual. Better to be safe, you know?”

“I guess,” Kris said, trying to supress the relief that was flowing through her. “Ooh, here are our first customers of the day!”

Helen never noticed the quick change of subject, and Kris smiled in self satisfaction. Hopefully, with the subject already over and done with, there wouldn’t be many, if any, questions. It would also hopefully stop Helen from looking too closely at her puffy middle. If nothing else, wearing diapers had definitey taught her how to think quickly. With a quick wish for a good day for Helen, Kris went over to say good morning to the kids.

The dark shades were still closed in the bedroom, making it perfect for sleeping late into the day. The two lovers were intwined arm in arm, trading kisses as they enjoyed each other’s company. Even in the twilight of the room, you could see a little of the room. A large, king size bed was the most prominent feature, covered in a deep crimson comfortor. Metal posts connected to one another at the corners of the bed formed a canopy, where a white, transparent cloth was draped over the cross pieces. A dark, cherry wood dresser rested against the wall next to the door, while a matching desk was placed in front of the bedroom window. The room, which was usually kept in a neat order, was in a bit of disarry, thanks to the weekend visitor.

“Still comfy?” one of the lover’s asked the other.

“Yes thank you,” another voice answered.

“I love this silk nighty on you. It’s so… sexy.”

“Yeah? I’m not really sure I like it too much.”

“Well I like it, so that doesn’t really matter, now does it?”

“Gee, love you too. I’m glad at least you like it! I guess we have to actually get dressed sometime today, huh?”

“Unfortunately,” one of the voices answered, sounding a little sulky. “I suppose we should be a little more social tonight. What to wear is always the question though.”

“At least that’s not till tonight,” came a voice with sensuous tone. “I hope we can think of something to pass the time until then…”

Kris lost herself in her regular routine once the kids started arriving, and all thoughts of her ‘panty lines’ were pushed to the back of her head. The kids were ultra-hyper during the day, which was pretty typical for Friday. That usually drove Kris a little out of her mind, but she was pretty happy with it today. Everytime she saw Helen look across at her with a questioning look at her coat, inevitably there would be a mini-crisis that would keep the two from talking. It was the first time Kris was ever glad to hear a temper tantrum starting, or seeing a game of tag get out of hand.

After the incident from yesterday, Kris was a little more cautious about wetting her pull-up. She decided that one small trip to the restroom just before lunch would carry her through the day for the most part. Either way, the pull-up would be able to handle any small afternoon wettings that she had. “I wonder how a diaper would do through the day,” she thought to herself while putting some blocks away. For a few seconds, she imagined how the thickness would handle her work time wetness, but a look at how the pull-up showed through her pants quickly pushed that idea out of her head.

As the day wore on, Kris couldn’t help but smile. Helen hadn’t had more then a few seconds to talk to Kris since the morning, even during naptime when Kris conviently retreated to the girl’s room for a little bit. She giggled at her cleverness, sure that disappearnce to the bathroom would just help to reinforce her story. Sam was keeping his distance today, which Kris was thankful for. There was only one thing she didn’t count on, and it came in the form of a tiny hand that tugged on the side of her coat.

“Hi ya Kris,” Jessica said as she looked up.

“Hey bratling,” Kris replied absentmindedly as she continued straightening up the playroom. “Have fun today?”

“Yes! I drew a picture for you today, wanna see?” Jessica said as she rabbed Kris by the hand, not waiting for an answer. A few seconds later, Kris held up a picture that looked like Kris, Helen and Jessica in a green field with the sun overhead. She smiled at the ‘work of art’, and gave Jessica a hug in thanks.

“You’re quite the artist bratling, but I wouldn’t show your mom this for a little while. She didn’t have fun cleaned the tables this morning!” Kris said with a laugh.

“Oh, she gets like that,” Jessica said with an exaggerated roll of her eyes. Kris just looked at her, trying not to laugh. If Jessica was like this at her age, Kris didn’t want to be around when she became a teenager! “Kris, why are you wearing a diaper?”

Kris felt her heart leap into her throat for a second. She quickly looked over the room, hoping no one else was close enough to have heard the proclamation, said in that load voice that young girls only seemed to use when they said something embarrasing. She opened her mouth to go into her explanation, but a look down made her stop. Her explanation didn’t exactly work for a little girl! Kris stuttured for a second, trying to figure out what to say. “I’m not wearing diapers bratling,” she said in a quiet voice, and she winced at how silly that was.

“Of course you are,” Jessica said, still in that loud voice. She pointed right to Kris’s puffy middle with a smile that said she expected to be praised for being so smart. “Not that it matters, but I thought only babies wore diapers.”

“Well, not at all the time,” Kris said in a weak voice, feeling her legs start to shake a little.

“Well, it doesn’t matter, I still love you,” Jessica said with a smile.

“Thanks bratling,” Kris said as she tried to decide whether to tell Jessica to keep her secret. She held off though, knowing that often times, telling a small girl to keep a secret was a big mistake. Just the idea that she had a secret was often times too much temptation for a little girl not to tell someone. In the end, Kris decided to not make it a big deal, while saying prayer after prayer that Jessica wouldn’t tell her mother. “Okay, time to get ready to go home. See you on Monday?”

“Sure!” Jessica said as she hugged Kris goodbye, giggling when her hug made Kris’s pull up crinkle a little. “Bye bye!”

Kris didn’t waist any time in getting ready to go home, and breathed a sigh of relief when she pulled out of the parking lot. “Oh well,” Kris thought to herself, “if she says anything, at least I won’t have to worry about it until Monday.” Her thoughts soon turned to the upcoming weekend, and what she was going to do. She took a deep breath, the air filled with the feel that only comes at the beginning of a weekend. As she sat at a traffic light, she willed herself to relax, complete with a little wetness flowing into her pull-up. She smiled when she felt the wetness seep through her pants, giving her a warm feeling.

“Definitely time for a relaxing weekend,” Kris said outloud to herself. “Let’s go home.”

Mary smiled when she saw Kris pull into the parking lot. Matt would be over soon, and she was looking forward to seeing how the night unfolded between the two. She was looking forward to introducing Jay to baby Krissy, and knew that he would have fun spending time with her. Of course she would have more though. She also had to hope that Matt wouldn’t have a problem with Jay ‘babysitting’ a little, but she doubted he would.

Jay was in the bathroom now, trying to clean himself up after a day spent laying in bed with her. This was the first time she’d let him out of the bed in a while, and she laughed at how stiff he looked. Mary gave him a small kiss on the ear after wandering to the bathroom, and draped her arms over his shoulders as she hugged him, trying to be a little gentle.

“You know hun,” Mary said in a low, seductive tone. “Since your meeting Krissy tonight, I think it’s only fair that she meet all of you.”

Mary felt excitement wash over her as she looked at the panicked look in Jay’s eyes, and smiled in sensual delight as she ran her fingers lightly down his back.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 38 - Meetings

“Come on honey, let’s get you ready for tonight,” Mary said, the amusement in her voice betraying the serious look she had on her face.

Jay looked over at her, feeling a few butterflies in his stomach start to take wing as he wrapped a towel around himself. He always knew there was something ‘different’ about him, but had never quite known what until he met Mary. When he went to college, he was the picture of a classic college nerd. He was always withdrawn from people, with a self esteem so low that he could barely meet anyone’s eyes. By most accounts, he was almost completely different today, with an air of confidence that usually seemed to infect people, and a relaxed manner that made him easy to like.

Meeting Mary at the time seemed like such a series of unfortunate events, complete with being locked out of the dorm by a college prank after being soaked to the bone. He wouldn’t have minded normally, just not in the middle of autumn with temps a little too cold for comfort. Fortunately for him, Mary didn’t think it was particularly funny either.

He remembered feeling completely embarrassed as she dragged him into the women’s dorm, barely acknowledging him when he tried to tell her he was fine multiple times. After a few minutes, he gave up and followed behind politely, realizing that he didn’t have much of a choice with the grip she had on his hand. Later on, after they were together, she often remarked that he followed more sullenly then politely, but that was always said with a smile. After a few minutes, and a few surprised looks from the dorm’s residents, Mary stopped in front of a door and peaked her head inside. After a second, Jay felt her tug him into the room behind her.

That was how it all started at least. They talked for a long time that night, while he sat in a bathrobe that she gave him while she brought his things to the laundry to be dried. There was just something about her that made him feel like he could talk to her about anything. He spent a lot of nights in her room after that, just as friends at first, but they shared a deep bond that they both felt right off the bat, and it didn’t take long for one thing to lead to another, as it usually happens in college life.

The state of their current relationship all came from one night though, a few months into dating. They were laying down on her bed, sipping wine that Mary always seemed to have on hand. Mary seemed a little off that night, seeming like she wanted to say something but was holding back, not sure how to approach it. It wasn’t a feeling that was typical for Mary, who always seemed to have a sense of self assurance that drew people to her. With their bodies intertwined, and both a little tipsy from the wine, Jay nervously asked her what was wrong, easily expecting the worse. What ended up happening was anything but what he expected.

A nervous Mary started talking about the first night they met, in a voice that was soft and unsure. He could tell she was smiling uncertainly as he gave her a hug for reassurance. After a few minutes, words started to pour out of her, about how she had so much fun that first night, dragging him along and practically forcing him into her room. He had smiled down at her, remembering his own feelings from that night, remembering a deeps sense of exhilaration that was even stronger than the embarrassment of being in the women’s dorm soaking wet. After a few seconds, he told her about his own feelings, and it felt like both their lives changed in that moment.

They made love that night, but not in a way Jay had ever experienced before. Mary took control like she had on that first night, directing everything from what was touched and how it was touched. Jay couldn’t believe the feelings that coursed through him, and the sensations that her touch brought. He felt more alive during that night then he ever had when he was with someone before, and the rest was, as they say, history. They started looking for information on how to further explore their feelings, and pretty soon they were trying things that Jay had never even imagined, and loving just about every experience. There were some he could certainly live without, but even those he tolerated so Mary could enjoy them.

Mary was perhaps the most surprising aspect of it all though. Mary was by most accounts pretty conservative, usually working late into the night at the library, even though she was active on the campus from time to time when the mood struck her. She was also a regular church attendee, something that was pretty rare on the campus. If Jay had met her on the street, she would never have imagined her being into something like their relationship.

The other surprising thing that came from the relationship was the change in himself. He hated looking back to the time before Mary. He really was a geek, uptight and completely withdrawn, and he hated admitting that to himself. As they started exploring their needs a little deeper, he felt more and more confidence in himself. He was still usually regarded as being a little shy, but that didn’t stop him from becoming one of the most active leaders on the campus. His look changed too, moving from standard jeans and t-shirts to dockers and button down shirts that gave him a better feeling about himself. Mary still contends that the wardrobe change was her handiwork, and after seeing how she handled Kris the past few weeks, Jay was wondering if she really was behind it.

He looked up from his reveling to see Mary looking over smiling at him, a smile of pure delight on her face. She was at her most beautiful when she was genuinely excited about something, and Jay could tell that she thoroughly enjoying this. “Do I really have to do this?” Jay asked in an unsure voice.

“Yeah, you do honey,” Mary said still smiling. “I know you like this, even though you deny it, and there’s nothing wrong with it. I know you liked wearing the silk nightie last night,” she said with a wink. “Besides, I think it’s only fair that the two of you meet on somewhat even ground.”

“I don’t want to Mary,” Jay said in a near whine, feeling his lips curl down a little bit in a frown.

Mary came over and put her arms around Jay and hugged him, letting him in her own way that she understood. “I don’t really care,” she said in a quiet voice, that somehow seemed menacing in its silent way. “You were very bad leaving class this week, especially without telling me. You deserve what’s coming for that anyway, and I’m honestly not in the mood for nonsense right now. Boys need strict discipline, and I expect you to accept it like a good boy. Otherwise, you’ll only make it harder on yourself.” She smiled up at him, and Jay bent down to kiss her when a sharp swat landed on his ass. Even with the towel for cushioning, he jumped from the force of her hand. He was still rubbing the spot when she walked back into the bedroom. “Now, drop the towel, come in here and be a good boy, okay? Otherwise, we’ll do things the hard way, and I doubt you’d like that.”

Jay felt his face warm as he let the towel drop around his ankles. Mary had gotten dressed while he was in the shower, complete with pair of black pants and a sleek blouse. He dropped his eyes when she looked at him, feeling his face flush. He always felt intimidated when she was fully clothed and him sitting there naked as the day he was born. He covered himself as best as he could, but it didn’t do very much to help his embarrassment. Underneath it all though, he felt excitement rush through him as he slowly walked towards the bedroom. When he reached her, she spun him around and Jay felt another swat land on his other cheek, and gasped when he felt the heat rising from where her hand landed.

“That was for being sulky,” she said, still with a gleam in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Jay mumbled as he tried to turn back around. Instead, he felt her hand tighten on his shoulder as another slap landed. A tiny yelp escaped his lips this time, and he had to take a deep breath to calm himself.

“I’m sorry what?” Mary said, with a hint of warning in her voice.

“I’m sorry Ma’am,” Jay said quietly, trying to sound apologetic. Mary’s grip loosened a little, and Jay slowly turned around glad he sounded meek enough for her. She could be touchy about that at times.

“You’re lucky we don’t have more time to do this properly, but we’ll take care of that later on,” She said as she wagged a finger under his nose. Jay felt a little rush of excitement, hearing the hidden promise of some nice play time later on, that they both usually enjoyed. Well, at least Mary always did, and him most times.

“Yes Ma’am,” Jay said.

“That’s better,” Mary said with a smile. “Now, lets get you dressed.”

Mary took him by the hand and led him over to her dresser. She opened up the top draw and started rifling through her piles of lingerie. She held up a few pairs of panties for him to look at, and each one made his face blush, especially when she made him feel them to check their softness. She ended up picking a pair of silk panties that were deep red, with a little bit of lace on the edges. Jay knew from experience that inevitably, a matching bra would be produced from one of her other draws. He shuddered when she bent over, holding the panties open in front of his legs.

“Come on honey, time to get your panties on. Step through the hole like a good girl,” Mary said in a slightly mocking tone that just seemed to melt him a little. He lightly stepped through with one foot, and then the other and felt a chill go through him as she drew the panties up his legs. Her hands felt so sensuous as she pulled the silken panties up his body, to the point that he shuddered at her touch when she pulled them over his privates. She gingerly snapped his undies when they were on, and playfully touched him through the sheer fabric.

She grinned up at him as she turned back around, and began looking through the draws again. A few seconds later, the inevitable matching bra was pulled out, that she tossed to him and told him to put on while she looked for a few more things. He fumbled with it for a few seconds before he got his arms though, and as usual the hooks took more than a few tries to get right. He smiled when he got the bra on, remembering the first time when he needed Mary’s help after a few minutes of frustration. Taking them off was definitely much easier. He looked at himself in the mirror, feeling a mix of emotion. Mary turned back around and pulled him to a hug, playfully running her hands over the outside of the bra and giggling a little.

“I love seeing you like this,” Mary said as she softly touched the side of his face. “Your face just seems to alternate between feeling embarrassed and feeling excited. Well, at least other parts of you are almost always excited.” Mary giggled again as she pulled him down, kissing him as deeply as possible as their bodies rubbed against each other. As he started to pull away, he felt her grab a few hairs on his leg. She smiled up at him as she plucked them, giggling again when he made a small ‘eeep’ sound. “You know, we have to take care of this sometime,” she said holding up hair she held in her fingertips.

Jay felt himself flush again, and couldn’t quite manage an answer. Chances were, anything he said would probably make it more likely to happen.

“Well, I don’t think we need nylons for you today since I have an ankle length skirt for you to wear, but the next time I expect your legs to be properly shaved incase you need them,” Mary said with a wicked grin.

“So much for hoping to avoid that,” Jay thought gloomily to himself. Mary pulled out a long black skirt for him, that he stepped into with a little bit of a shudder. “At least this covers my underwear,” he thought to himself as Mary pulled the zipper up on the back of the skirt. A dark red, sating blouse completed the outfit. It was a little snug around his shoulders, and it felt tight when he moved his arms the wrong way. The sleeves were also a little short, but that didn’t matter so much to him. Mary turned him towards the mirror again so he could look at himself. He always felt vulnerable in a skirt, the opening making him feel exposed somehow. He ran his hands down the side of the blouse, feeling the soft material between his fingers, his breath coming in excited gasps. Mary came up behind him and pulled her arms over his head, clasping a tiny saphire necklace around his neck. She laid her lips on his neck and gently kissed him, bringing a blush to his face.

“You look very nice,” Mary said as she hugged him from behind. “We’ll skip the makeup since I’m sure Kris is wondering why we haven’t come out yet. So, ready to meet your new sister?”

Jay felt his face warm again as Mary pulled him to the door, and almost felt his knees give out as she turned the knob.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 39 - Babysitting

Kris was sitting on the couch with her legs folded up underneath her when she saw the door to Mary’s room open. She gasped when she saw Mary walk in, expecting it to be Jay finally coming out of hibernation. Her face turned a little red when Mary looked at the teddy bear she was holding in her arms, but shrugged her shoulders after a few seconds. Mary had seen her in worse positions after all.

“No work today?” Kris asked a little shyly, hiding a little behind her bear.

“I decided to call in so I could spend the day with Jay. Besides, this was a perfect lazy day, and taking care of a baby girl in the morning can be a little tiring,” Mary said with a smile.

“I’m sorry,” Kris said a little weakly, feeling a little guilty. “You don’t have to you know.”

“I know baby, but I really don’t mind. Actually, I have fun doing it,” Mary said with a wink.

“That’s good to know,” Kris said cheering up a little. “Speaking of take care of a baby, Auntie…”

“Does baby need her panties changed?” Mary said with a giggle. “I can’t imagine you like having a wet bottom very much, huh?”

“It doesn’t bother me, but I’d rather not get a rash thank you very much,” Kris said with a frown.

“I bet,” Mary said with a laugh. “Well, I’m not really in the mood for changing right now. Is it okay if Jay does it?”

Kris thought to herself for a moment. So far, Mary, Matt, Ellen and Court had all changed her diaper, so did it really matter? “No, I don’t care,” Kris said with a smile. “It’s only a diaper change. Hey, where is he anyway?” Kris looked over where Mary was still standing by the door, leaning against the frame.

“Well, so much for being on an even level,” Mary said thoughtfully. “I can’t believe how quickly you adjust Krissy,” she continued, shaking her head a little in disbelief. “Hey, you know how you get punished if you’re a bad girl?”

“Yeaaaahhhhh,” Kris said a little suspiciously, wondering what Mary was thinking about, and hoping it didn’t cost her a red bottom.

“Jay gets punished in other ways,” Mary said in a slightly serious way. “We have kind of a mutually beneficial relationship in that way. He doesn’t mind being punished, likes it in fact… and well, I’m sure you’ve figured me out.”

“I have now I think,” Kris said while looking up at Mary. “This actually explains a lot, especially why Jay always seems to walk a little lightly around you. I don’t really care about that Mary, I’m not really in the position to judge others, especially in a wet diaper. I just wish you had told me earlier, especially after all your lectures about being open in friendships.” Kris felt a little swell of satisfaction as she watched Mary’s cheeks color a little. Oh yes, very satisfying after the past few days.

“I know,” Mary said sounding a little tired. “I hope you can understand why I kept it quiet from you. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything like that. One reason I was so excited about all of this is that I’m finally able to talk to you about everything! It’s been such a relief to me, you have no idea. I’ve wanted to tell you since I found out, but didn’t want to push you too much.”

“Not push me too much, huh?” Kris said a little skeptically.

“No. I didn’t want to push you at all, but I thought you might need a little help, and I didn’t want you to go through all of this blind like I did when I started exploring this. I hated feeling like a freak, and I wanted to save you from that. It’s nice to know now that there are so many freaks out there, that we’re really not freaks! I only wish I knew that when I was younger. I hope you don’t resent me for all of this, I really tried to do the best I could,” Mary said in a bit of rush, looking for understanding. “I know I try to seem like I know all the answers, but sometimes their just aren’t any easy ones.”

“I guess I can understand that,” Kris said. “I’m not saying I’m ready to forgive you completely yet, but I understand. Okay, so how do you punish Jay exactly? I hope you haven’t kept him tied up since he got here in your bedroom, though that would explain a bit.”

“No, that’s not safe silly,” Mary said with a smile. “How about I just show you?”

Kris watched as Mary took another step into the room, pulling an arm behind. After a few more steps, Mary pulled an almost shaking Jay into the room. Kris gasped at the way he was dressed, and felt her own face warm a little with embarrasment. His face on the other hand looked almost completely white, and his eyes were deadlocked on the floor. Kris tried to think of something to say, but her mind was completely blank. After a few seconds of looking at him, she got up and gave him a tight hug, smiling when she felt his arms around her hugging back.

“I can understand how you feel,” Kris whispered in his ear as she squeezed him even tighter. “Besides, I think we share something that they can’t understand. Let them think they’re always in charge, we know the truth!” Kris glanced over at Mary and smiled, which grew when she saw the confused look on her face.

“You’re right,” Jay whispered back. “Besides, I’ve always wanted a little sister, even though they’re usually brats,” he said while picking her up a little and hugging her.

Kris made some exaggerated gasps, and laughed when he put her back down. “I’ve always wanted an older brother, even one that wears skirts from time to time!” She felt Jay tense up for a second, and worried that she had upset him. “You know I was only kidding, right?”

“Oh, I know,” Jay replied. “Besides, I have a sister who wears diapers all the time. I would hope a skirt some of the time wouldn’t be that big of a deal!”

The two fell into a fit of laughter, that seemed to start all over every time they looked at each other. Eventually, Mary shooed them over to the couch to sit, before they fell over from giggling fits, she said.

As Jay was about to sit down, Mary pulled him over to her. “Speaking of someone who wears diapers, your new sister needs a change. Please take care of that.”

“Yes Ma’am,” Jay said, a little brightly.

“Good girl,” Mary said. “Okay, her supplies are all in her room. I’ve already picked them up from out here once today, so why don’t you go change her in there?”

Jay just nodded as he turned and scooped Kris up off the couch. Kris gasped, and reflexively threw her arms around his neck, pulling herself against his chest to keep from falling. Her legs were hanging off his other arm, and Kris felt completely helpless as he carried her towards her room like a little doll. Jay wasn’t as strong as Matt, but Kris was still a light girl, and it didn’t take much to hold her. She thought that Mary could probably do it easily as well! Jay carried her through the threshold into her room, and Kris giggled to herself.

“What are you giggling about?” Jay said while smiling. “I didn’t pick you for one of those little girls that giggle at everything!”

“I was just thinking that I never expected anyone but a future spouse to carry me over a threshold,” she said, giggling a little again.

“You’d better watch out, or you’ll giggle yourself into an even wetter diaper!” Jay said with a wink as he tossed her onto the bed. She landed with a bounce, and laughed as she sank into the bed.

“Do it again!” Kris said through her laughing. “I haven’t been tossed like that since my daddy used to do it!”

“Not now brat, you need a dry diaper before you start leaking,” Jay said with a smile. “Besides, I’m not sure the one you have now could handle it if you do end up wetting yourself again.”

“Ugh, fine,” Kris said in that dramatic fashion that only little girls can usually get away with.

“Good girl,” Jay said, “now, no wetting when I take off your diaper, okay?”

Kris didn’t even bother dignifying that with a response, and just settled in to have her diaper changed. She picked up one of her other teddies before he slid her back down the bed so that her legs dangled off the side of the bed. Jay unbuttoned her pants and slid them down her legs, and Kris smiled when he rubbed her tummy a little before pulling off the wet pull-up.

“Mary said you liked having your belly rubbed during diaper changes,” Jay said softly while he threw out the soaked pull-up. “She also said you were ticklish too. I wonder if I should check that too while we’re getting you a fresh diaper. What do you think?”

“Please no! I hate being tickled,” Kris said with her eyes a little fearful. “If you tickle me, I’ll wet the bed, I swear!” Kris said, hoping the threat would work.

Jay looked down as if wondering if he should or not, and in the end walked over to the side of the bed and pulled out a dry diaper. He slid the diaper under her with a little help, and quickly wiped her skin with one of the baby wipes. Kris gasped when the cold wipe ran over her skin, and breathed a sigh of relief when Jay announced she was nice and clean. A sprinkling of powder followed as usual, and Kris happily breathed in the scent, loving it as usual. He pulled the diaper up snuggly between her legs, and taped it in place. He rubbed her tummy again, and she laid her head down with her eyes closed and reveled in the feeling.

After a few seconds, the rubbing stopped and suddenly she felt a bunch of fingers attacking her sides. He jerked as the giggles started pouring out her, as she fought as hard as she could trying to get Jay’s hands away from her sides. He laughed when she kicked her legs, and the tickling just kept going.

“Please…,” Kris said thrugh gasped breaths. “Please stop!!!”

“You’re the one who said the threat if I started tickling,” Jay said while tickling her upper ribs. “This is what you get for saying something like that to an older brother!”

Kris felt herself fighting as hard as she could, trying everything from scratching to active kicking that didn’t do any good. Pretty soon, she couldn’t even do that. She kept laughing uncontroably as she moved her body, trying to get away from Jay’s tickles. After what seemed an eternity, she gasped when she felt a little wetness flow into her diaper, but even that didn’t stop the fits of laughter from her lips.

“Please, please, please,” Kris said through ragged breaths.

“Naaahhh,” Jay said with a laugh of his own.

Kris clamped her legs down to stop herself from completely losing it. Every tickle made the urge worse though, and pretty soon Kris was rocking back and forth from the effort of trying not to wet. Jay laughed for a second, and then the ‘tickle barrage’ stopped. Kris laid for a second and took some deep breaths, and felt a few tears on her face. She relaxed for a second, and tried to pull herself up that was pretty futile.

“Gee, thanks for that,” Kris began, but cut off when the tickling started again. She felt shock come over her as she felt her pelvic muscles completely give out, as her diaper started to feel warm. Jay noticed the change also, and stopped tickling as he watched Kris completely soak herself. Kris blushed the whole time she was wetting, and stuck her tongue out at him when she finished. “Love you too big brother,” was all that she managed to get out.

“I’m sorry, I just couldn’t resist after what you said earlier,” Jay said with a mirthful laugh. “Wow, how does such a little girl wet so much?”

“It’s a talent,” Kris said with a smile. “You know, you were sent in here to get me into a DRY diaper.”

“I know, but we can take care of that later,” Jay said with a grin that said he was proud of this. "Let’s get back to the living room before Mary wonders what’s going on in here.

“Oh, I already know,” Mary said from the doorway. “That was really cute! I figured you were finished when the laughter cut off all of the sudden. Daddy came in while you were giggling Krissy. Why don’t you go say hi to him?”

“Okay!” Kris said excitedly, even forgetting the sagging diaper around her hips. She slid off the bed and crawled a little, only getting up when she reached Mary. She walked out of the room, and then took a few hurried steps as she jumped up and landed on the couch with a loud crinkled thump.

Mary just turned towards Jay and pulled him into a hug. “I guess you’ll be a good babysitter for tonight after all, huh?” she said with a proud smile.

A short time later, Matt and Mary sat down to dinner together, each talking about their respective partners. It was a quiet restauant, a small Italian place that was only a few blocks from the apartment. Classical music was playing in the background, and Mary had a plate full of raviolli in front of her while Matt cut up his chicken parm.

“It was nice to see them get along so well,” Mary said as she lifted a glass of wine to her lips. “I wish I had a camera for when she hugged him. I’m sure they’ll be good support for each other.”

“That’s true,” Matt said. “I couldn’t believe how he had her giggling during that diaper change. It’s a nice little family we have going,” he finished with a wink.

“The only downside was that I don’t even think the clothing bothered Jay today, not anywhere near as much as usual, at least. I guess seeing Kris in a diaper kind of cancelled his embarrasment, huh?”

“I’m sure it helped, along with her supporting him. I can only imagine what they whispered to each other.”

“Who knows? I’m not sure I like this so much,” Mary said with a laugh. “Oh well, things will work out.”

“Well, you know, Kris went to diapers willingly because of how she is… It was natural to her. Something tells me that wouldn’t be true for most people. That’s something to think about at least.” Matt said as he lifted a glass of soda to his lips with a slight grin. “And I’m always here to help.”

Mary nodded her head as she listened, feeling her smile start to spread across her face.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 40 - Weekend Plans

A few hours later, Kris was laying on the couch feeling exhausted. She had a pile of pillows propping her up, and a soft knitted blanket was draped over her as she sucked quietly on her nooky while watching a movie. Jay, as it turned out, was a very stern babysitter that expected everything to be ship shape by the time Matt and Mary returned. She supposed that was her fault though for giggling at Jay. She couldn’t help it though. The way he practically scampered to the bedroom to get changed after Mary gave him permission was just too cute.

After the afternoon of sweeping, dusting and wiping though, Kris wished she had kept her occasionally big mouth shut! When Jay said everything looked tidy, Kris gathered up her pillows and blankie and headed for the couch, feeling sleepiness start to pull her eyelids down. She woke up a little as Jay came out with her diaper changing supplies, but the feel of him removing her wet diaper and gently cleaning her skin relaxed her until she felt herself drifting off. She mummered a quiet thank you around her nooky, that was cut short by a yawn as she fell into a peaceful sleep, just as Jay was pulling the fresh diaper over her.

Kris woke up to the feel of someone stroking her hair. She jumped a little, not quite sure where she was, when she heard Matt’s deep voice whispering reassurances that she was okay. Slowly, the memory of falling asleep on the couch came back to her, and she felt herself blush a little when she remembered it happening as Jay changed her diaper. She moved a little, glad to feel the warm thickness between her legs as she stretched.

Her nooky had fallen out of her mouth and now rested on her chest, and the blanket was folded up under her chin leaving her feet uncovered. She looked at her nooky again and wanted it, but not enough to let the cold apartment air under her blanket. After a few seconds of thought, Kris started to sniffle a little, and whined softly as she looked at the pacifier. She heard Matt laugh softly, as he picked up the paci and held in front of her lips. Kris eagerly leaned forward to place it in her mouth, and gratefully started sucking as she laid back down with a content sigh.

“Enjoy your afternoon nap lazy girl?” Matt asked a little rhetorically.

“Mmmm, yes Daddy,” Kris answered, giggling at how her words were a little slurred by the pacifier.

Matt smiled as he reached over and wiped the corner of her mouth. “You like your pacifier, huh?” he said, holding up a thumb that had a little sheen of wetness on it. Kris felt her whole face flush, as she sunk into the blanket hoping to wipe the edges of her mouth without Matt noticing. She realized it was futile as he started to laugh at her efforts to save some semblance of dignity. That idea quickly fell away when she remembered the number of times he’d seen her with a wet diaper between her legs.

“Yes Daddy, I do,” she replied sheepishly. “Want to try?”

Matt broke out laughing. “No thanks sweetheart, I like seeing you nurse on it enough,” Matt said as he warmly looked down at his baby girl.

“Okay Daddy,” Kris replied, the edges of a grin appearing on the sides of her pacifier. “How was dinner with Mary?”

“It was nice,” Matt replied. “You can come with us next time, we just wanted you and Jay to have some time alone today.”

“I figured,” Kris replied. “I was a good girl while you were gone Daddy.”

“I heard Krissy,” Matt replied as she beamed with pride. Until he continued that is. “I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“What does that mean?” Kris asked a little sharply.

“All little girls look like angels,” Matt said brightly, “but that doesn’t mean they are.”

Kris sniffed a little indiginately, thinking about how she was always a good girl. Well, maybe she did something wrong once in a while, but that was it. She looked up to see Matt with a grin on his face, which only widened when he realized that no answer was forthcoming.

“That’s what I thought,” Matt said with a little satisfaction in his voice. “So, want to hear about what we’re going to do this weekend?”

“Su-re!” Kris replied suddenly feeling excited. She sat up and laid her head against Matt’s chest as she looked up expectantly.

“Well, first off, I think my little girl needs some new clothes, unless you want to be walking around in a t-shirt and diaper all the time. Even though I do enjoy the sight of your padded butt walking around, I think it’s a little too cold for that all the time. Besides, I think all little girls should show how pretty they are, don’t you think?” Matt said as he tweaked Kris’s nose for a second. Kris wrinkled her nose, trying not to sneeze after Matt squeezed it.

“I guess so Daddy,” Kris replied uncertainly. “Where are we going to get clothes for me though?”

“The girls department silly,” Daddy exclaimed, shaking his head which made Kris feel like a real two year old. “I think the mall will give us the most selection, so we’ll take a trip there tomorrow and see what we can find.”

“The mall?” Kris said a little nervously. “But nothing’ll fit right!”

“Aunt Mary and I actually discussed that, and we think you’ll be okay,” Matt said with a grin. “She told me you already buy petite clothing, so height won’t be a problem. I was a little worried about your hips, but Mary thinks that should be okay in the larger girl sizes. Any more excuses missy?” Matt finished with a wink.

“But… No, I guess not Daddy,” Kris said sounding a little exasperated. She brightened though as a thought came to her. “Can I ride the carrosel when we go?”

“If you’re good you can,” Matt said, rolling his eyes a little.

“Hey, I’m always good!” Kris said as she watched Matt roll is eyes. She always loved riding the horses on the carrosel when she was little, and remembered how her real daddy used to hold on to her when she rode. “Will you come with me?” she asked a little shyly.

“Of course, I wouldn’t let my baby girl get hurt,” Matt said. “I also wanted to do something tomorrow night, but this is completely up to you.”

“What daddy?” Kris asked.

“Well, Aunt Mary was telling me about how all of this started to happen, and mentioned that you met someone that you seemed to like. I was thinking that you could invite her over for a play date tomorrow evening.” Matt said seriously. “It’s completely up to you though Krissy, I don’t want to make you or your friend uncomfortable.”

Kris felt her eyes get a little wider with every word, and visibly shook herself when she realized that Matt was finished speaking. “How…,” she stuttered for a second. She cleared her throat, telling herself to calm down a little. “How did you know about Court?”

“Well, Mary told me about the talk you had the first night when you started acting a little strangely. Mary just naturally assumed that it was because of Court being a woman. When we started talking about it though, it seemed a little strange to me that you became interested in diapers at the same time as becoming interested in her. The only way I figured that could happen was if the two overlapped, or if you lied about Court being a lesbian,” Matt said in a soothing voice. “Mary actually agreed with me after I brought up that point, and I think you just confirmed it for us.”

Kris blushed for a second, realizing that she may have accidentally outed Court. “She actually is a lesbian,” Kris said sullenly, hoping Court wouldn’t be mad at her. “I’m not sure this is a good idea though, with everything that has happened. She liked me, and I liked her back. I don’t know, I think I’m confused,” Kris said rambling to herself. “Is it okay if I talk to her tonight about it?”

“Of course baby,” Matt said as he drew his strong arms around her and gently squeezed. “That’s why I said it was up to you. I know how little girls like sleep overs though, and she’s welcome to stay if you want.”

“Really Daddy?” Kris asked quizzically.

“Sure, I think it would be fun,” he said, “although I can’t see all of us getting much sleep with two giggling girls probably staying up half the night!”

Kris giggled as she hugged Matt back. Even as she hugged him though, her thoughts were all on Court, and how she would react. Kris said a silent prayer to herself, hoping that Court would be understanding. After taking a few deep breathes, Kris got up and went to her laptop, writing a quick message to Court asking if she could call when she got a chance. Kris sat back after hitting the send button, and eyed the phone nervously, not sure if she wanted it to ring or not.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 41 - Shopping Prep

Kris woke up the next morning, enjoying a long stretch that ended in a soft yawn. A quick glance at the window told her it was cloudy outside, and the quiet thrumming told her it was probably raining too. She thought about the rain for a second, feeling an answering need between her legs. Her legs widened a little, the soft padding of the middle of her diaper caressing soft skin, a comforting warmth spreading through it. After enjoying the feeling for a second, she rolled on her belly and slid out bed.

Her diaper was thoroughly soaked, and sagging a little on her hips. The chilly morning air nipped at her naked legs, and she quickly drew her arms up around a her, feeling thankful for the long sleeved t-shirt she was wearing. She took a second to fix her hair a little, brushing a few strays away from her eyes. Her disarrayed hair was soon forgotten though, as the smell of bacon cooking started to seep into the room. Kris took a deep breath and smiled, knowing that Mary was already working on their traditional Saturday morning breakfast.

Kris gave one last glance at herself in the mirror and spun on her heels, turning towards the door and the promise of a warm cup of coffee. Her hand stopped just above the doorknob as she glanced down at her diapered middle, the realization that she was about to step out in a wet diaper without a second thought, coming slowly. She shivered for a second, the diaper feeling a little constricting, clinging to her. A deep breath steadied her a bit, the fears of what she was doing starting to ebb away. She glanced at the draw holding her pajama bottoms for a second. With a rueful shake of her head, she opened the door, remembering for what seemed the umpteenth time, that her diaper being seen only ever seemed to matter to her.

Jay was lounging at the kitchen table, the paper folded out in front of him. He spared Kris a quick smile before diving back into his reading, a cup of coffee hooked in his fingers. Mary was busying herself in the kitchen, spatula in hand, and Kris could already see a small mountain of pancakes growing on a plate next to the stove. She felt her mouth start to water as she looked at the pan of sizzling bacon, and quietly snuck into the kitchen, swiping a piece from the paper towel where cooked pieces were drying. Mary glanced up and smiled, swatting the spatula once against her palm, giving Kris a warning. Kris smiled weakly at her, trying her best to look a little innocent.

“Good morning, how is Krissy today?” Mary asked warmly as she turned back to the stove, flipping the pancakes with ease.

“She’s good , thank you,” Kris replied absently while quietly eating her stolen piece of bacon. “A little wet though.”

“Somehow, I’m not surprised,” Mary said with a small giggle. “Well, I’m cooking, and Jay doesn’t seem to be much use today. Your daddy will be here soon though, and I’m sure he’ll be happy to take care of you.”

Kris felt herself perk up when Mary mention Matt, and felt a small, secretive smile spread across her lips. When she looked up, she could see Mary watching her out of the corner of her eye, a tiny smile showing. Kris quickly turned around and stepped out of the kitchen, not wanting to wait for the comment she was sure was coming. She walked quietly over to the table and sat down, stretching to steal the page of comics that were sitting in front of Jay.

After a little bit, a knock came from the door, followed quickly by Matt stepping into the common room. He was well dressed today, wearing a pair of black pants that suited him well, and a rich, deep gray sweater that looked pretty warm. He was freshly shaved, and Kris could just make out the scent of his regular aftershave. Matt came over and gently kissed the top of her head, and lightly stroked the side of her face.

“Good morning sweet heart, ready to go shopping today?” Matt asked with a wink.

Kris glanced down at herself and couldn’t help but laugh. “What do YOU think, Daddy?”

“Well, I’m fine with you like that,” Matt said with a wink, and Kris felt just a sliver of apprehension, wondering if he was serious. “I think we’ll get you cleaned up before we go though, how about that?”

“Thank you Daddy,” Kris said with a warm smile, and happily sank back into her chair as Mary brought out the breakfast dishes with Matt’s help. Kris blinked a little when her plate was slid in front of her, and shook her head a little in surprise. Everything was already cut up for her, and even her bacon was torn into little bits. She looked up to see Matt smiling down at her, and felt a tiny pat on her head before he went to sit in the chair next to hers.

Breakfast was pretty typical for their weekend, with Mary talking about anything and everything, including a few things that brought blushes to Kris’s cheeks. With everything out in the open about her and Jay, Mary seemed even more relaxed and comfortable with herself. Of course, Kris figured, it was hard not to be comfortable with yourself when there was a woman wearing nothing but a t-shirt and diaper sitting across the table from you. Kris attacked the pancakes in front of her with ferocity after she felt her tummy rumble, and only paused a few times when Matt would reach over, patting her diapered middle. After a little bit, Kris happily slumped back in the chair with a rounded belly, feeling a tiny burp escape her lips.

“Piggy girl,” Matt said while laughing. “Well, even piggy girls need to get cleaned up once in a while. Come on little girl, go lay down on your bed.”

Kris jumped out her seat, feeling her now cold diaper press against her middle and happily ran to her, jumping onto the bed and bouncing a few times. She heard a little laughter drift in from the other room, but didn’t pay it much attention as she laid down, pulling her teddy bear against her chest. Matt came in a few seconds later, smiling down at her. Without a word, he lifted up her t-shirt and quickly plucked the tapes open on her diaper, peeling it slowly away from her skin. She lifted her hips up automatically, getting used to the diaper change routine. Matt smiled down at her and slid the diaper out from under her, blowing a little on her damp skin, sending shivers up her body.

“Now, no wetting without a diaper on, right?” Matt said with a little mirth in his voice, winking down as she turned, walking to the bathroom. Kris heard the creak of some handles, and the sound of rushing water filling the bathtub. He came back in smiling, and Kris felt another shiver run through her. “Sit up for a second baby girl.”

Kris sat up, and stifled a small protest that was rising in her throat when Matt tugged the t-shirt over her head, leaving her hair falling in wisps around her face. Kris shook her head quickly and brushed the hair away, wrapping it around her ears to keep it back. The cold air started to cause goosebumps to rise all over her skin, and she looked at the door to the bathroom longingly, knowing the water would be warm and very welcome. Matt laughed, seeing her look at the door, her eyes looking back at him a silent question in them.

“You can take your bath in a few seconds baby,” Matt said wryly as he slipped a towel between her legs, spreading it out, “but first we have to talk about something.”

“Yes, Daddy?” Kris said cautiously, knowing full well where these little ‘talks about something’ can lead.

“Well baby, we’re going shopping for appropriate clothes for you today, right?”

“Yes, Daddy, I think it’s going to be fun too. For some reason anyway,” Kris said while laughing.

“Probably because you’re still thinking about the carousel,” Matt said with a wink. “Since we’re going looking for girl clothes though, I think it’s appropriate for you to look like a little girl.”

Kris’s eyebrows drew together as she wondered what he meant, feeling a little confused. “I’m sorry Daddy, I’m not really sure what you mean.”

Matt didn’t answer her, but instead slowly drew his right hand up, showing Kris a pair of tiny scissors. Kris felt a nervous giggle rise in her throat as the tips of Matt’s fingers trailed across her small patch of hair. The giggle quickly turned into a flush as his nimble fingers pressed a little closer, a small sigh escaping her lips. Kris closed her eyes, wincing a little as she heard the first ‘click’ of the scissors. Kris leaned back and accepted the inevitable, knowing that even if she argued with Matt, he would win out in the end. Acceptance didn’t help her embarrassment though, more and more heat rising to her cheeks with each bit of hair that fell away from her.

After what seemed an eternity to Kris, Matt tickled the side of her thigh and Kris jumped up, looking down to see her trimmed pussy, gasping at the sight of it. Her skin tingled a little bit, sensitive flesh meeting sensitive flesh, sending a few shivers through her. She closed her legs a little, barely able to see the thin line of hair that covered her now. When she looked up, Matt was smiling down at her.

“We’re not done yet baby girl,” he said with a smile. “Now, I want you to go get yourself cleaned up, and that includes cleaning yourself up down here.” Matt lightly ran a hand over her vulva, indicating where he meant. Kris just nodded weakly in understanding, feeling her heart beat quickly at the thought. “I also want you to shave your arms too little girl. I only want to see your eyebrows and the hair on your head left when you’re done. Understand little one?”

“Yes Daddy,” Kris managed weakly.

“Good girl,” he said with a smile. “Now make sure you’re careful, that area is going to be sensitive, especially the first time shaving, so take it slow, and if it gets irritated, you can stop, okay?”

“Yes Daddy, thank you,” Kris said with a smile.

“No problem baby. Now, scoot, we want to get to the mall sometime today!”

Kris jumped off the bed, gasping at the feeling of her trimmed pussy. Every step seemed to bring a different sensation as she crossed the room, slightly hunching herself a little to relieve the feeling for a second. She heard Matt’s soft laughter as she crossed into the bathroom, quickly closing the door before he saw her blush get any deeper. She spent a few seconds getting ready for her bath, pulling out some of her soft vanilla scents to add to the water, and also getting a new blade for her razor, hoping to avoid any problems.

She stepped into the tub gleefully, dipping her head in so she could feel the warmth all around her. She felt the tiny goosebumps slowly ebb away, and gave a content sigh as she laid down, feeling a little drowsy. After a few minutes of soaking, she reluctantly sat up, and dipped her razor into the water, letting it soak up some of the heat. Kris let out a deep sigh, resigned to the fact that she would do as her Daddy said, and rolled her eyes dramatically as she stood up, the water dripping down her skin as she picked up the shaving cream. She quickly lathered herself, and went about the task of tending to her nether region, gently handling each fold of delicate skin as her hair, her womanhood, slowly vanished before her.

Her arms went quickly after that, being a relatively easy job comparatively. She sighed when she reached down to rinse herself off, and stood up, turning slowly to the bathroom mirror. Kris couldn’t help but feel her jaw open slowly as she gazed at herself in the full mirror, gasping at the young body that greeted her. Turning about slowly, she checked herself again and again, amazed at the smooth skin. She looked up, locking eyes with her mirror image, shocked to see a young girl gazing back at her. Kris’s hands gently ran over her skin, lightly touching her freshly shaven areas, her eyes growing wider with every sensation. One small tear slid down her cheek, and Kris shook her head, not sure if the tear was for joy or sadness.

With her chin held high and her back straight, Kris stepped out the tub, feeling ready to go shopping.

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 42 - Shopping

Matt smiled from the front seat of his blue Ford SUV, enjoying the scene in front of him. He told Kris when she got out of the tub that he had to run out, and for her to be waiting for him on the steps of the apartment building by one o’clock so he could pick her up. He came a few minutes early to make sure he was on time, not wanting his little girl to be worried about her daddy if he was late. Kris was already waiting on the steps though, and so engrossed in blowing on dandelions that she didn’t even see him pull up. After a small chuckle, and a shake of his head at how innocent she could be at times, Matt beeped the horn, seeing a surprised Kris lift her head and color a little.

Kris bounded up onto her feet as Matt stepped out of his truck, and subconsciously brushed off the front of her outfit. He smiled as she walked over, glad to see that Mary was kind enough to follow the directions he gave her before leaving. Kris was dressed in a deep navy blue skirt that ended an inch above her knees, with a snowy white, short sleeved blouse. Her hair was tied back today with Matt’s piece of velvet ribbon, though a few stray wisps fell in front of her eyes now and then. She looked almost like a professional businesswoman, at least until you glanced down and saw the pair of saddle shoes that accompanied the outfit.

Matt couldn’t have pictured the outfit being any better, and made a mental note to get a nice thank you present for Mary. Anyone walking by wouldn’t give Kris a second thought, or certainly not think she was a little diaper girl. Matt suspected Kris didn’t know that though, especially with the unsure look in her eyes as she crossed over the parking lot, the two thick diapers that Matt asked Mary to put on her this morning adding a little waddle to her movements. It also added a subtle, tiny bit of extra curve to her hips and bottom, which Matt noted with delight. He smiled brightly as she came up, and gave her a warm hug before opening the door to the backseat of the SUV.

“Good afternoon Krissy, how are you feeling today?” Matt asked as he motioned for her to jump in the truck. Kris looked at him questioningly for a second, her brows lowering in thought. She looked on the verge of speaking, and then at the last moment just shrugged and climbed up.

“I’m pretty good, Daddy,” Kris said, as Matt reached over her with the seatbelt, smiling when he heard the metallic click on the other side. He also smiled when he saw her knees slightly parted by the thickness between her legs. Kris was gazing out of the window the whole time and Matt wondered what was on his girl’s mind.

Matt hopped in the front seat, adjusting the mirror a little bit so he could keep an eye on Kris. The drive over to the mall was pretty quick, and pretty quiet. Matt kept glancing back, and always the picture was the same, Kris’s head resting in her hand, blue eyes staring out the window at nothing as they drove. Matt kept wondering about what was going on until he swung the vehicle into a spot by the entrance to a Macy’s, and turned around in his seat to look back at her.

“What’s the matter baby girl?” Matt asked with concern in his voice. “Did something happen with Court?”

“No daddy, she hasn’t called yet.” Kris answered. Matt frowned at the short and to the point answer, so unlike her usual self.

“Then what’s the matter?”

“Nothing Daddy, just tired. Can we go inside now please? I’m just thinking a little, I’m fine though,” Kris answered, a note of pleading in her voice.

Matt sighed at the wall Kris put up, and reluctantly stepped out onto the pavement, Kris following a few seconds after. As Kris stepped past him towards the entrance, Matt pulled her into a tight hug, whispering into her ear. “You can trust me angel, please tell me what’s wrong?”

Matt could feel Kris tense for a moment before relaxing in his arms, her head resting against his chest. She had her eyes closed, her lips moving every now and then like she was about to speak but unable to form the words. Matt waited patiently, silently reassuring her with his strong arms that everything was okay. After a last deep sigh, Kris spoke in a weak voice that barely reached his ears. “I’m scared Daddy.”

Matt blinked for a second, feeling a little caught off guard. He had expected this, just not quite so soon. Which meant that Kris was doing a lot of serious thinking. “About what angel?” Matt asked

“About what I’m feeling, what I’m doing, everything!” Kris blurted out quickly before taking a deep breath. “I don’t know what it is Daddy. I love being in diapers.”

“But scared of why you like them, or what it makes you?” Matt finished, feeling an answering nod as Kris’s head brushed against his chest. “I know this must be hard on you Kris, or hard to believe this, but there is nothing wrong with liking diapers, with drawing comfort from them and liking to wet them. There is also nothing wrong with wanting a daddy to take care of you. In fact, I bet you rather like thinking about that, don’t you?”

“Yes Daddy, I do. It’s just so… strange I guess. And Mary mentioned maybe actually needing diapers in the future if I get too used to them!” Kris finished, a little indignantly.

“Well angel, that’ll only happen if you want it to, and either way, your daddy will help you,” Matt said as he brushed her hair softly. “I know it’s scary, but little girls can always come to their daddies when they’re scared, and we make things all better, right?”

“Yes Daddy, I guess,” Kris said softly.

“Besides, I like seeing your cute diapered butt,” Matt said with a laugh, which got a smile from Kris.

“Well, my butt is cute in them,” Kris agreed, giggling for a second before pulling away from Matt. “Thanks Daddy, let’s go shopping and have fun now!”

Matt laughed when he saw her eyes brighten at the prospects. “Nice to see you’re back to normal, little girl,” he said with a laugh as he took her hand, leading them to the entrance.

The mall was busy today, with groups of shoppers wandering down the rows of stores. Matt smiled as he saw groups of kids running here and there, as tired parents watched them from the benches that lined the middle of the walkway, a few bags usually piled around their legs or sitting next to them. He watched Kris carefully, noting when her eyes would trail just a little bit longer on a certain store, and when she’d smile one of her ‘secretive’ smiles that weren’t such a secret to Matt. When he saw her take a few steps towards a KB toy store, Matt quickly pulled her back, leading her over to a JC Penny’s instead.

“We’re here for clothes today little one,” Matt said, “but if you’re a good girl, we’ll see about going in there.”

“Oh, thank you Daddy!” Kris answered excitedly. “I promise I’ll be good.”

“Mmmm hmmmm,” Matt hummed loudly as they walked, Kris continually trailing behind as she looked about. She saw a beautiful, white silk blouse that was on sale, and turned to take a look at it, which only got her arm tugged a slight tug, and a small stumble as she quick stepped to catch up to him. “Do you think you’re ready for big girl clothes today baby?”

“No Daddy, I was just looking,” Kris replied, a little sheepishly, which Matt answered with another “Mmmm hmmmm.”

Matt smiled when he saw the entrance to the girls department, with white carpeting under the clothes racks and a faint pink tint on the walls which had rows of mirrors, making the room look enormous. The faint scent of strawberries hung in the air, and Matt could see a few mothers dragging reluctant kids behind them, from bored five-year-olds to sullenly fifteen-year-olds looking embarrassed to be seen. Matt reluctantly steered his baby girl away from the toddler section, and dragged her slowly towards an area for special events.

He laughed softly when he saw Kris’s eyes light up at the rows of tiny dresses hanging on the racks, from snowy white communion dresses to a few richly-colored velvet ones, left over from the holidays. As he went over to the row of dresses labeled size sixteen and up, another word of thanks to Mary passed through his thoughts, as he wouldn’t have known where to start without her help. Matt glanced over at Kris, seeing her eyes staring almost blankly at the floor. He pulled her into a hug, feeling the quick breaths that only come from a mix of fear and excitement, nervousness with anticipation. A soft stroke on her cheek brought her eyes up slowly, and Matt smiled at the brightness in them. Few things ever compare to that beauty, Matt thought silently to himself.

They left the store about an hour later, with Matt smiling every time he thought of the number of times he saw Kris blush. The precious moment was a woman carrying a tiny baby girl, commenting that the dress Kris was holding up was very pretty, winking as she passed. Matt couldn’t help but chuckle softly as he pulled Kris into his arms, whispering reassurances softly. They came out carrying two dresses though, that were neatly folded over Matt’s arms inside a plastic wrap to keep them clean.

Faint music started to grow louder as the pair walked slowly through the mall, and Matt smiled when he remembered Kris’s request from the other night. The carousel was placed in the central court of the mall, while rows of stores went off in various directions. It was pretty large, and painted a bright white with horses painted in all sorts of colors and combinations. Tiny foot pegs were on the side of the plastic ponies, some high up for the usual children, and some a little lower down for the occasional adult that wanted to ride. It was playing ‘Oh Suzanna’ in an almost comical high-pitched version, which was cute the first time you heard it. The second and third playing was something else however.

Matt grabbed Kris’s elbow gently and hurried towards the carousel, and for the first time during the day, Kris wasn’t resisting at all. She even ended up in front of him by the time they reached it, her long hair flowing behind her as she quick-stepped to the entrance. The worker at the entrance did a small double take, an then smiled at the pair, opening up the gate to let the riders off as the spinning horses came to a stop. A number of the young kids ran out of the gate and right around back to the entrance, one even bumping into Matt, which brought a smile to his face.

The worker lifted up the bar to the entrance, and smiled again as Kris ran past him, jumping up nimbly onto the platform with the horses in a swirl of skirts. Matt followed a few steps behind, laughing at his girl’s excitement. Kris quickly came up to a horse painted a dark brown, with black hair streaming down it’s neck, as a horde of children came up behind, each quickly taking hold of their horse.

“Oh, I love this horse daddy!” Kris said excitedly, blushing when she looked around at the people around them. Matt just laughed, quickly jumping onto the one next to Kris’s. Kris did the same thing, until she stopped as she was about to swing her leg over. She colored for a second, and Matt realized the problem.

“Having issues, little one?” Matt said with a little levity.

Kris turned on him, her eyes a little furious at his comment, making Matt’s smile even broader. “Can we sit on one of the seats instead please? Even sidesadle…”

“You’re cute underwear will show,” Matt finished. “Don’t worry Krissy, no one will notice anything. And if they do, it’s only a diaper, right? But you said you wanted to ride the horses, and I’m comfortable here. Besides, I think all the seats are taken.”

Kris visibly bleached, looking out over the crowd of parent’s that were either standing with their kids, or watching from the surrounding rails. As the carousel slowly began to turn, Kris turned her diapered bottom and sat down carefully on the plastic saddle, doing her best to find a way to cross her ankles. Matt smiled over at her, wanting to tell her that every time she tried, it only made her diaper more obvious, but wisely kept his comments to himself after the last look he received. As the music started and the horses began to move up and down, Kris was saved by something she had both hoped for, and dreaded. She dropped from the horse, reached into her purse and pulled out her cell phone.

“Hey Court, thanks for calling.”

Kristine’s Desires 1-45 by Emi

Chapter 43 - Sunday Afternoon Gathering

Kris stood in the center of her room and glanced at herself in the mirror for what must have been the hundredth time. Her hands subconsciously smoothed out the front of her new dress, as she looked at the time, not sure if she was happy or upset that it was nearly six o’clock. In the end, she decided that she was mainly just scared out of her mind. Court would be over soon, and meeting Matt for the first time, not to mention Mary. Kris giggled in spite of herself, wondering if Court knew what exactly she was in for tonight.

She closed her eyes for a moment, and willed herself to calm down. She took a deep breath and stopped her arms from brushing her dress again, and gave herself one last look over. Her light brown hair was combed back today, with her red velvet ribbon holding it just above her neck. She was dressed in the yellow play dress that Matt and her had picked out yesterday, a simple dress that ended just above her knees. A little white embroidery ran along the hem and the sleeve cuffs, which ended just below her shoulders. The air in the apartment was a little cool today, and Kris was thankful for the long white socks that ran up to her knees.

Kris was also thankful for the rather thick, cloth diaper between her legs today that was helping her to keep warm, even though they did add a slight waddle to her walk. Matt, or daddy rather, had given her a choice. Either a cloth diaper thick enough to last through the night, or a disposable that he would have to check. As she wandered around the room, Kris wondered if she had made the right choice, but the shock of seeing Matt show up with the layers of cloth and yellow plastic panties that matched her dress decided her. She shrugged for a moment, and then giggled as she shook her bottom a little.

Matt was still in the bathroom getting ready. They went out early in the morning to get everything they wanted for the play date, and had happily slunk off to Kris’s bed so they could take a lazy Sunday afternoon nap. They both woke up shocked as they looked at the time, and Matt quickly switched into ‘daddy’ mode as he got Kris ready. Unfortunately they both found out, daddy or not, it takes a while to get a baby girl ready for a play date.

As the clock turned to six, Kris strode out of her room, feeling only a little silly as she noticed the exaggerated motion her hips had to make to accommodate the thickness between her legs. Mary and Jay were already sitting on the couch, sipping wine as they talked. Mary was laying against the arm of the couch, her legs draped over Jay. She was dressed pretty casually, with a pair of black pants and a lime green turtleneck. Kris thought the outfit looked warm and cozy, and she felt a stab of envy when a stray breeze ran up her dress, giving her goosebumps.

“Help yourself to a little wine Krissy, it may warm you up a bit,” Mary said as she turned and looked over the arm of the couch, laughing a little at the look on Kris’s face.

“Little girls are allowed to have wine, Auntie?” Kris said sweetly, smiling as she giggled softly under her breath.

“Being sassy already little girl?” Mary said while laughing. “I didn’t think that would start until your friend got here. It’s a special night though, and yes, you’re allowed a little wine if you want some. Jay bought a nice bottle of shiraz, and I know you enjoy that. We also put out some cheese and crackers, and some bacon wrapped shrimp for an appetizer.”

Kris wet her lips when she looked in the kitchen, seeing the food laid out. She quickly thanked Mary and Jay for laying out everything and headed towards the table, stopping suddenly as she heard a soft knock at the door. Feeling her heart beating furiously, Kris turned towards the large white door, feeling her face warm slightly.

“Go ahead and answer the door for your guest, Krissy. It’s not nice to leave them on the porch you know,” she heard Mary say, and Kris knew that she was probably working hard to keep from laughing.

With a little reluctance, and a little foot dragging, Kris approached the door, wondering how she’d feel when she saw Court. She was suddenly thankful for the cold day, sure that if it was any warmer, her skin would be clammy everywhere, instead of just in her diaper. After brushing her hands against her dress one last time, she slowly opened the door.

All of Kris’s nervousness vanished as soon as Court swept into the room. She grabbed Kris in a tight hug, and tickled one of her ribs after a second, bring a loud yelp from Kris as she jumped back. A smile bloomed on her face, and Kris didn’t she think she could have held back the matching one that spread on her lips. There was always something about Court, about her presence, that just made you smile and feel so at ease. Kris shook her head after a second, and came around enough to invite Court in, making hasty introductions.

Mary slid her legs off of Jay and stood up, and gave Court a quick hug of her own, and a little tickle to repay her for one she gave Kris. “It’s nice to finally meet you Court,” Mary said while giving Kris a little wink. “Come on in and make yourself at home. I love your outfit by the way.”

“Nice to meet you too Mary, and thanks,” Court answered, smiling down at her outfit as she took a seat in the common room. It was almost a picture of a young school girl outfit, with just enough adult touches that wearing it out wouldn’t draw too many comments. She had on a long sleeved, white blouse that had the top few buttons open. She had on a dark blue sweater also, that was open in the front, and matched the blue/green plaid skirt that she was wearing. The skirt ended at her knees, and she only had a small pair of socks on with a pair of saddle shoes. Kris was amazed that she didn’t freeze to death on the way over, but then again she was probably as well diapered as Kris was. All in all, it was a picture of how Kris always envisioned Court. Sweet, with a little touch of sexy added in.

“Would you like a glass of wine, Court?” Kris asked as she walked back towards the kitchen again, hoping that maybe this time, she’d get near the appetizers.

“Please Kris, thanks,” she heard Court reply as she slipped into the kitchen. She got down two glasses, and went over to get the bottle of wine when she saw her daddy walk out of her bedroom. His hair was still a little damp, and Kris could tell that he must have quickly towel dried it, and ran his fingers through it that gave him a great, slightly rugged look. Kris felt her breath quicken a little, as it usually did when she saw him like this. She frowned for a second as she looked at the food, but decided to be a good girl in the end as she went to introduce Court to Matt.

Kris walked over, wondering how Court was going to do with meeting Matt. She saw the same uncertainty in Matt’s eyes also as she led him across the room, gripping his hand tightly. She didn’t see any uncertainty in Court’s eyes though, as she got out of the chair and hugged Matt. Kris was amazed as usual over how comfortable Court was with herself. She could never picture herself just going up someone she just met and hugging them! She heard Court whisper something to Matt before letting him go, and Kris quirked an eyebrow, wondering what she said. She forgot about it after a few seconds though, as conversation soon broke out over what the ‘adults’ were going to do with the two baby girls running around.

Court looked as indignant as Kris felt when the adults banned the babies from the furniture, somehow sounding perfectly reasonable as they said there were only so many chairs, and it was only fair that the people without padded butts should get to sit on them. Unfortunately in the end, it didn’t matter how indignant Court and Kris got, as Jay, Mary and Matt seized the moment and settled themselves on the furniture, laughing to themselves. Kris thought of standing in the middle of the room to make a point, at least until Court pulled on her arm until she was sitting on the floor next to her.

She was frowning until Court whispered a few things about ‘groan ups’ that had Kris giggling by the time she was done, and the adults looking down and wondering if they should be worried. Kris was soon whispering back about all the ways to get even that she could think of, especially when you were taking a bath and felt your babysitter could use one too. After Court’s conspiratorial laughing stopped, and they both smiled up innocently, Kris announced that it was definitely time for a drink, and to eat some of the appetizers.

Kris sprang up and practically ran to the kitchen this time, not wanting anything to spoil her third try at the food. She was glad to see that the wine glasses were still sitting on the table from earlier. She picked up the bottle of wine, and popped the cork off, enjoying the scent of the wine, which always made her feel relaxed. As she tipped the bottle to pour, she felt a pair of arms wrap around her. She looked up to see Matt standing behind her, holding her for a second before lightly kissing her neck and stepping back.

“What do you think you’re doing baby girl?” he said quietly.

“Pouring some wine for Court and I,” Kris replied carefully.

“And using wine glasses silly girl?”

Kris’s eyes narrowed for a second after she heard the words. “But daddy, we have guests tonight.”

“Yes, we have a guest. But a baby girl for a play date, not an adult,” Matt replied. “Baby girls get treated a certain way here, which you agreed to,” he amended, as he playfully toyed with the ribbon binding Kris’s hair, the symbol of her agreement. “We’re already letting you have wine with Court tonight, but baby girls drink out of either bottles or sippy cups. You know Court better than I do, so what do you think she’d be more comfortable with?”

Kris thought for a second before deciding. She couldn’t see drinking wine out of a bottle, so she reached up and took out two of her sippy cups, and quietly filled them, hoping that Court would be okay with this. She turned around and quickly gave Matt a gentle kiss on his cheek before going back to sit with Court. Fortunately, she didn’t react at all to the cup, and started drinking the wine from it as though it was the most natural thing in the world. “I guess it is pretty natural to her,” Kris thought for a moment. “I wonder if it’ll ever be that natural for me?”

Watching Court helped Kris to relax about the sippy cup, and raised her own up to her lips, getting ready to savor the first sip of wine when another knock came at the door. Kris stifled a curse and put the cup down again, glad that she managed to bite her tongue. She had no intention of getting any swats with Court around, and a curse was a sure way to get them! She looked at the door though, confused over who it could be. For a moment, panic seized her, with images of everyone from her neighbors, to her family, to the cops being on the other side of the door, as she sat in diapers on the floor with another baby girl.

Her eyes were wide open while she watched Mary open the door, but they went even wider when she saw who walked in.

“Hello Kris, Mary thought you’d like all of your little girl family here with you tonight.”