Carrying on with Elizabeth’s “In for a Penni” story.
This is a continuation on a story I was not given permission to continue. So the names and characters are different and the story line is different but the idea will be similar
If you have an interest in reading the first story, it is posted through this here http://www.adisc.org…2463-penni.html
Proper background information to begin this story: I am obviously changing things from the story written by Elizabeth, names and characters are going to be different in many ways. This story will be how an 8 year old girl spends the first half of summer diapered and babied by her 17 year old sister who enjoys forcing her through this since she had an accident at the beginning of the summer. Every day the 8 year old, named Ashley would be diapered as soon as her parents left for work in the morning, and spend the whole day diapered, often times would also have a pacifier, throughout the day and was left to use her diapers as well. Her 17 year old sister named Megan made her go through this, changing her and babying her the whole way. 8 weeks into this story, Ashley fell from a tree and knocked her head. At this time, the girls’ mother was arriving home from work and Ashley was still diapered, and wet at this point. Cindy, their mother, finds out about the diapers, and the events of the entire summer and is furious with Megan. She allows Ashley to decide the punishment for Megan, and the twist and major difference here, is that Ashley wants Megan to spend the rest of the summer, and possible school year diapered and babied just like she was for the past 8 weeks. Obviously this story is different from the original Penni story in many ways, but the concept and background do come from that original piece, that was very well written by Elizabeth. I am not trying to continue that specific story, but rather build on the idea and hopefully do not butcher the whole thing. I would love feedback.
(The story starts from Ashley’s perspective, but soon changes)
“Give me your keys,” mommy demanded, holding out her hand. Meg rolled her eyes and walked off to her room to get them. Once she returned, mommy removed the keyring that had Meg’s car keys, handing them to me. “Now, be careful with those,” she warned. “Make sure not to lose them, okay?”
I nodded, still giggling as I stared at my new prize, never expecting my first keys to go to a car.
“Are we done?” Meg asked, sinking down onto the couch and glaring at me, like it was my fault she was getting in trouble.
“That,” mommy smiled, “is up to Ashley.”
I glanced up in surprise, the allure of the keys forgotten. “Me?” I squeaked.
Mommy nodded. “Do you think Meg needs more than that? It -was- you she was diapering all this time, after all.”
For a moment or two, evil images began to flood into my mind, thoughts of Meg doing all my homework for me, and all my chores - not that she hadn’t been doing most of them lately anyway. My nose wrinkled at the memory of all the messy diapers I’d endured for her, all the places she’d taken me and treated me like a baby. The incident with Breadstick Girl and Lilly was still fresh on my mind, of course, and I certainly didn’t forget the spanking at the mall, squirming in my seat with the recollection.
I hadn’t even told mommy about that, I realized, and I doubted Meg had, either. While it wasn’t quite the same as everything else she’d done, I suspected mommy wouldn’t approve of it nearly as much as Meg had told me she would. It might even be enough to convince mommy to give her a taste of her own medicine - or to let daddy give it to her, once he got home, since he spanked a lot harder.
This was a once in a lifetime opportunity, I told myself. You could probably get mommy to do -anything- to Meg, and Meg couldn’t even get mad at me for it! At least, not while mommy was around, and then I could always tattle on her. I could get revenge on her for being such a rotten big sister, show her just how much of a baby I was -not-.
“Like what do you mean Mommy?” I asked somewhat in a shy manner. Even with all those thoughts in place, I had never really seen Meg get into any real trouble. In fact, I had never seen her spanked, or even really yelled at for that matter.
“What if we made Meg go through what you went through? Do you think that would be fair?” Mommy shifting her total focus to me as Meg sat on the couch, jaw almost falling open in disbelief.
“You mean like be diapered?” I was shocked to say the least. I was thinking of Meg doing my homework and not being allowed out of the house. But to see her being a baby? Now that would be something!
“Well yes, don’t you think it would be fair Ashley if I made her go through everything you did all summer?” Meg looked like she wanted to object, but probably knew she was in enough trouble. I couldn’t really tell if Mommy was serious or not.
“I mean, yeah, I guess that would be fair.” Those were the only words that I could spit out of my mouth. I couldn’t really believe it. Was mommy really going to diaper Meg and baby her?
(now Meg’s perspective)
“Mom! You cannot be serious!” I replied in a loud tone, I could not really tell if she was being sincere or not. But I sure didn’t like where it was going. Sure it would be a fair punishment, but maybe if I offered other options instead. “How about you just ground me, and make me do chores? I don’t want to wear diapers.” This was at least worth a try.
“Meg, Ashley did not want to wear diapers either, but you practically forced it on her.”
“Oh come on! I didn’t force it on her, she had an accident, and it was the best solution.”
“Enough! Meg, I am so frustrated with you, you are doing this. And if you complain, you will be stuck diapered that much longer!” Mom was basically yelling at this point. I knew I had better just keep quiet. And it’s not like mom was going to stick with it, especially with her work schedule. It probably won’t last past the weekend. So maybe I should just go with it. Pissing her off isn’t going to do me any good.
It was fine putting Ashley in diapers and the pacifier. She was really really cute as a baby. And she was small enough to pull it off. I won’t be as cute, I will look like some retarded person who is diseased or something. I don’t like where this is headed, but I certainly don’t want to piss mom off anymore than she already is.
Ashley must be loving this because she seems excited by everything mom is saying. Much to my chagrin. I wasn’t sure what else to expect, I started to sink deeper and deeper into the couch, as Ashley seemed too afraid to even look at me, I found myself starring at her. I guess it wasn’t really her fault, but it sure was hard to not be upset with her.
Mom seemed to notice the awkward quiet moment as she seemed to rush her next sentence out. “Well I doubt the diapers that Ashley was wearing will fit you Megan, so we will probably have to go and get you some from the store. Ashley, would you go get my purse?”
I sat there, motionless, in a daze ridden with shock. I couldn’t really believe it was happening. Mom was very serious, and I knew she wasn’t going to be talked out of it. Tonight, I would be wearing a diaper for the first time since I was an infant. Just the way Ashley had been wearing them for the past two months. I thought about it, there was only six weeks until school started. I doubt mom will make me wear them that long. It’s not like she will even have time to monitor me come Monday when she returns to work. So it will probably be a long weekend, but after that I am sure that is all I will need to deal with. Mom never really sticks to things she says she is going to do anyway.
Mom and Ashley both stood up, Ashley ran into the kitchen to get mom her purse. I figured that meant I was supposed to stand up as well and get ready to leave. I stared at the ground, I did not want to make eye contact with mom. I knew she was pissed and staring at me, I didn’t want to potentially add anything to my plate. Ashley seemed happier and in pretty good spirits as she came running back into the living room with mom’s purse. She liked to carry her purse around when she could, I guess it made her feel like an adult.
Wordless, mom and Ashley started toward the front door, and I followed, sulking quietly to myself. I was left with my thoughts, which pretty well cycled over and over. This can’t be happening, it was certainly denial, and I was certainly wrong.
We got into mom’s SUV, Ashley in the back, me in the front passenger seat. Mom turned the radio to an A.M. station and we listened to a political discussion that I could not care less about. It’s not that I don’t care for politics, I just don’t know much about what is going on, and don’t know enough to keep up with the day to day discussions. I was left with my thoughts, no one even spoke until we pulled up to Target. Then Ashley broke the silence, “Mommy, you are really going to make Meg do this? Do they even make diapers big enough to fit her?” It was an honest question, and I was sort of hoping that maybe mom was bluffing or that maybe whatever adult diaper supply Target had would have been purchased already. Of course, I knew better.
“They make adult diapers for old people who can no longer control their pee, honey.” Just like that, mom replied, like it was nothing. As though it was a perfectly normal question answered with a perfectly normal response. We pulled into a parking space two rows from the front door. Normally I would be happy to have such a close parking spot, not today though. I wanted every store to become so packed that we could not even shop.
We get out of the car and walked into Target. Still quiet, I am not sure if I should say anything. And if so, what should I even say? I think Ashley is basically trying to avoid me. Which makes sense, hell I would be to. She grabs mom’s hand, just like she had mine the last eight weeks. I missed being the adult that she looked up to. Now, that role would be incredibly different.
Mom walks us straight to the baby section along with a cart. She is looking at the baby diapers, and of course isn’t seeing what she wants. I am not even looking, this was enjoyable with Ashley, now this is hell. We move slowly down the section until I finally hear mom say something. “Hey, look at these Meg, they have babyish diapers for bigger kids. I wonder if these will fit you.” I look up, and much to my horror I see what looks like baby diapers but in a larger design. I had never noticed them before, of course I didn’t need anything larger than size 6 for Ashley.
Mom asked me what size hips I thought I had. I wasn’t really sure. I knew I was a size 2 for pants and dresses so that is all that I mustered for a reply. Mom kept inspecting the package that she was now holding, I didn’t even bother to look, I just stood there with my arms crossed trying to not look her way. She seemed satisfied with the diapers she was holding, threw them in the cart, and to my horror, added three more packages. I finally spoke up “Mom, four packages?! That’s like one hundred and fifty diapers!” I was shocked, I still stuck to my belief that this would be over by the end of the weekend.
“Well Meg, I don’t know why you seem so surprised. You are wearing these for at least the rest of the summer, and probably into the school year. I bet these won’t last you through the month.” I was surprised, and let down at the same time. Ashley didn’t say a word, just was watching, standing there barely reaching mom’s waist in height. I think she knew better than to say anything.
Mom turned toward Ashley though and started to ask her questions about what all she did this summer. The more details that Ashley told her, the angrier mom seemed to get. I sort of paid attention, sort of stood there in a daze in my own dream world. I heard Ashley tell her things about the pacifier and the ribbon, the bottles, being left to poop in her diaper in the middle of a book store etc etc. I just sort of became more and more embarrassed. Not because I would be forced to do those things, but because I made my little sister go through so much. Hearing her say it, and put it into words made me feel terrible about what I thought was us just having harmless fun. Maybe it wasn’t as much fun to her as it seemed to be. I could not help but feel ashamed. To add to that, there was no way mom was going to let up now. Now that she was being given more information, she was certainly going to be tough on me. “Meg, I can not believe you made your little sister do all this! You can plan on being forced to do everything she had to do and more.”
“Mom, I thought she was enjoying it, I thought it was fun. Did we not have fun Ashley?” I asked her, hoping for a little remorse. “I thought you were enjoying yourself, I didn’t know you hated it that much.”
“Megan, I enjoyed spending the time with you, and the attention, but I didn’t like being forced to be a baby. I’m not a baby, I’m a big girl, and you don’t seem to think that.” Man, was the guilt ever present now. All I could muster was a simple. “I’m sorry, you are a big girl, I’m very sorry Ashley.”
“Well Megan, you won’t be a big girl the rest of this summer, that’s for sure.” Mom said while pushing the cart down the aisle picking up pacifiers, bottles, wipes, powder and everything else. I just followed, feeling even worse than I did before.
When mom was done in the baby aisle I got a peek at the diapers she had picked out. They looked like baby diapers, but they said on the side “designed for bedwetting teens” I was positive they would fit me without a problem. This was a discouraging moment to say the least.
Mom headed toward the clothing section, she picked out some pajama’s holding them all up to me, eyeing them and seeing if they would fit, she picked out a lot of babyish looking clothes. I knew this was going to be a very long weekend. I still clung to my hope that she would let up after this weekend, but she sure was going to spend a lot of money. We headed to the checkout, I was getting nervous, and scared, of what my weekend was going to be like, and what my potential summer was going to be like. And I was definitely not excited about it.
The drive home was quiet. I didn’t say anything, I knew mom was still upset, I could hear her muttering to herself. I wasn’t sure really how mad she truly was. I started thinking to myself about my friends, plans that I had for the rest of the summer, people I had wanted to see, the guy that I recently started talking to. All that would have to be avoided now. No way was I ever going to let anyone else see or hear about this. Ashley and my mom were not that big of a deal to me, but I didn’t want this embarrassment to spread, that was for sure.
When we got home, I was not really certain what I was supposed to do. Mom asked me to help her unload all of my ‘baby things’ as she referred to them out of the car and to put them in the living room. So I helped her carry the bags in. As soon as everything was in the living room, sitting on the coffee table, mom turned to me. “Alright, well let’s get you dressed for the rest of your summer.”
“Here?” I asked somewhat astonished.
“Yes, just lay down on the floor.”
I felt like I should at least plea, maybe she will have a change of heart. “Look mom, I’m really sorry, I just thought we were having fun, and that I was helping her because of her accident.”
“Oh give me a break Megan. You know she doesn’t need diapers, and you obviously did some really awful things to her. I just hope that through all of this you will learn to become a little nicer to your little sister.” And with that she opened the first package of diapers and pointed to the floor. I just sighed and laid down. Not like fighting would matter anyway, heck it would probably just piss her off. When I laid down, the first thing I thought about was how Ashley wasn’t in the room. In fact, I had no idea where she ran off to. I was sort of glad I didn’t want her to see me naked anyway. I assumed I wouldn’t get to keep my underwear for this anyway.
And then to my horror, I realized that my mom was going to see me naked! Once that realization set in, I put my hands over my eyes and mom started to undo my jeans. I just laid there, following her instructions, thinking of how much more fun this was when I was the diaperer, not the diaperee.
Mom finally had my jeans all the way off, and started to pull off my pink cotton panties. I knew my face was bright red now. I could hear the diaper crinkling as she opened it and asked me to lift my now naked butt. As I did I could tell she was placing the open diaper beneath my bottom. I slowly set my bottom down onto the soft diaper. I felt myself becoming inprisioned as mom forced my knees further apart and pulled the front of the diaper up. She pulled the dual tapes together on each side and I could myself trapped inside this babyish device. I just laid there, not saying anything, I started to cry as the emotions became overwhelming. Not only was I embarrassed, felt infantile, I was ashamed of the way I had made my sister feel, and now I was forced to be a baby for who knows how long. And now, to top it off, I was crying, how babyish can you be? Laying on the floor, just diapered by my mother and now I am crying!?!?! This was a new low for me, this much I was positive of.
Mom was obviously looking at me, I’m sure she felt satisfied. I pulled my hands from my face when I stopped the tears. I looked up at her, she told me to get used to them and walked off with my jeans in her hands. I sat up to inspect my new underwear. Wishing she would have left me my jeans, although I wondered if they would even fit, this diaper seemed thicker than even the thickest diaper I had put Ashley in. There were babyish designs of little cartoon animals in diapers along the top of the diaper. I sat there, with my diaper ballooning out from my crotch my knees bent as I was sitting up. Just the way a toddler would. I felt so infantile. I looked at the bags. I thought to myself, at least she didn’t get everything out. I also started to wonder again where Ashley was and what I was supposed to do now.
After about 5 minutes sitting like that, I started to feel somewhat disgusted with myself. Sitting there like a baby, I got up and headed to my parents room. I realized how difficult it was to walk with a diaper on. I kept thinking about how Ashley went through it. I noticed that my t-shirt didn’t cover my entire diaper, so I started to pull on it. I was going to ask for some sort of pants when I realized that mom and Ashley were in the room talking. I couldn’t really tell what they were saying, but I didn’t want to really know. I decided to just knock on the door and get it over with. Ashley was going to see my diaper at some point.
I knocked/walked in the room, Ashley turned and looked at me, and then down past my white t-shirt to my diaper area. I just decided to just bear with it. “Mom, can I have some sort of pants? I don’t want to walk around all night with the diaper showing.” Mom turned toward Ashley.
“Ashley, did you get to wear pants when you were around the house?”
Ashley was probably stuck in a difficult spot on that question, and I hated my fate being left up to her. “Some of the times….” She didn’t really seem confident in that answer. I started to think of all the times that Ashley had asked for pants and I had denied her.
Hopefully mom would have some level of mercy.
“So not all of the time right?” Mom replied.
“Well, no, not all of the time.”
I guess that was my answer, I looked pleadingly toward my mother.
“Megan, you heard her, you will go through what she went through. If she didn’t get pants, you won’t get pants.”
And with that, I decided to not push the issue with the pants, it wasn’t really the battle I was most concerned with. I had become reminded of the question with mom’s last reply.
“Well mom, do I have to actually use the diapers? Surely you don’t want me to have to use them, that would be gross.”
Mom seemed ready to answer this question before I could even finish the answer. “Megan, you will go through everything she went through. She just told me how you never let her use the toilet. You better believe the same will go for you. If you have to go potty at all, you can just go in your diaper, and wait for me to come and change you.”
And then the biggest realization hit me. She wasn’t even going to let me change myself! How could she!? That was so gross, so awful. I had not even thought about it yet. That was just too much.
“Change me?! I don’t even get to change myself? Mom, you have to be kidding me! It’s one thing to make me wear them, it’s another to make me use them, and it’s completely out of the question to not allow me to change myself!” I was half crying, half yelling at this point. It probably came out more like a shriek rather than a cry though.
“I don’t see why that is a surprise to you, you never let Ashley out of the her diapers, or let her use the toilet, or let her change herself.” Mom replied.
I knew that was it. I couldn’t help myself, I just started crying, and ran out of the room, face in hands. I wanted to get out of there before I started sobbing. I ran to my room, slammed the door and dove onto my bed. Diaper crinkling the whole way. This was officially hell.
I guess there wasn’t much left for me to decide to do. I got up and went over to my computer on my desk. I got a good cry out. I am not sure if I cried more for what I was about to endure, or for what I made Ashley go through. Either way, I felt much better after the cry. I decided to write some things down in my personal journal on my computer. Something I doubt I would ever share with anybody else, but I had been keeping it for several years now. The writing was even more therapeutic than the crying.
When I was done, I figured it couldn’t just sit in my room the rest of the summer. It was starting to get dark out, and it was a Friday night. Normally I would be checking my cell phone to see what was going on for the night, but I certainly wasn’t going anywhere, not like it was an option for me anyway. I figured dad was probably home already, and I am sure he knew what was going on. I decided it wouldn’t matter much, so I got up and to go and hang out with Ashley. I walked out of my room, and out into the living room, and sure enough, Ashley and dad were sitting on the couch watching tv. I decided to walk the long way around through the dining room into the kitchen so dad couldn’t see me. I wasn’t prepared for that yet. I saw mom in kitchen cooking dinner, I felt like it would help me get into her good graces if I offered to help cook.
“Sure, keep that pot stirring.” She said as I walked up crinkling toward the stove. She was finishing up a casserole while I was stirring a soup. She asked Ashley to set the plates and then dad came in. He looked at me, smiled, and didn’t say a word. He obviously knew what I was wearing, I was relieved he didn’t say anything. We sat down for dinner, and dad talked about work, and other boring stuff. I was just happy that Ashley and I were not the topic of discussion.
After supper I got up and grabbed all of the dishes and started washing them. I figured the more I do around the house, the more likely mom is going to feel sorry for me and let me off the hook. Ashley went to her room to read, and everyone carried on like nothing was different. I don’t know if this is a good thing or not. But I certainly wasn’t going to start any discussions. Mom and dad went into the living room and watched tv. This would be the normal time I would get ready to go out. But that wasn’t happening tonight. I did head back to my room, and decided to see how well I could hide the diaper with clothing. I locked my door and started trying on jeans. The first pair I couldn’t get the zipper up or snapped. But they were a pair of my skinny jeans. I did find an older pair of jeans that I was able to get on with a struggle. But much to my sadness, when I looked in the mirror, it was quite obvious to me that I was diapered. Not only did it stick out, but it looked like my butt was huge! This was definitely discouraging, especially because I am a jeans kind of girl. I found some skirts that worked though. They hid the diaper better, but I didn’t like how easy it might be to see, and again, how big my butt looked with the diaper. I found a couple of dresses that will work, but I can’t wear those all the time.
About 2/3rd’s through my clothing show for myself I heard my door try to be opened, and then a knock. I realized it was probably my mom, which was quickly confirmed when she said, “Meg, please open your door.” I went over there, wearing only my diaper and white bra and opened the door. “Please don’t lock your door Meg, you have no need for privacy while you are going to be diapered. I need to know that you aren’t trying to take it off.”
I just rolled my eyes and returned toward my bed to put on a t-shirt when I realized that my mom was carrying some of the bags from Target with her.
She sat them down on the edge of the bed and opened up the package of pacifiers and started to organize everything in my room. She opened the top drawer of my dresser where I keep my panties and took them all out. Not saying a word, she put all of my panties and thongs into a Target bag and started putting the diapers in the drawer. I could feel my heart drop into my stomach. I was starting to get nervous. She just keep going, I watched as she tied shut the bag of my underwear, she bent down, picked up the blue pacifier and stuck it into my slightly ajar mouth. She took off my t-shirt, pulling it over my head and told me to take off my bra. I just sat there starring at her, about to cry. As I took off my bra, I handed it to her, and she walked out of my room, leaving the door open, with me sitting there in just my diaper with my pacifier in my mouth.
On her way out, she said. “Don’t think about wearing anything else, I want you wearing only your diaper and your pacifier for the rest of the night, I want to be able to see when you need to be changed.” And she walked out the door.
I couldn’t believe it. I felt so vulnerable, so weak, so infantile. I was afraid to spit out the pacifier, so I decided it was time to get used to it. I started sucking on it. When she said she wants to be able to tell when I need to be changed, it made think about how badly I might have to pee. The reminder was all I needed as I could tell I sort of had to go.
I just sat there, alone with my thoughts. Starring down at my diaper trying to learn how to suck on my pacifier. What a weird feeling this was. I laid on my back and pulled the covers over my body. I could slide pretty well in my sheets because of the plastic covering on the diaper. I just laid there, trying to not think of the inevitable. I would have to pee, and use the diaper at some point. But I figured I could probably wait a fairly long time before I had to.
I thought about the events of the day, I thought more and more and more. Until I just feel asleep.
I realized I had fallen asleep when I started to wake up in the middle of the night, I looked at my clock, it was 12:19, my bedroom light was still on, I could tell the tv was still on in the living room. I must have only slept about 2 or 3 hours. I felt the need to pee, and I got up, and then it came back to me. I had sort of forgotten that I was wearing a diaper, and that I would have to use it. I looked over on my pillow and saw the pacifier sitting there. I must have spit it out at some point. I looked around, and I knew I would have to pee and that I would have to use the diaper. There was no real point in making an issue about it, so I got out of the bed, and squatted on my tip toes, knees bent, next to my bed. I couldn’t pee.
All those years of training had taught me to not go until I was at the bathroom. I imagined I was sitting on a toilet. I pretended water was raining on top of me. And I started to go just a little, and that was enough to force it all out at once….and it just kept going. I peed for what felt like an hour. I could feel the warmth of the pee touching my butt. I was encased in a diaper that was keeping my pee trapped around my body. I opened my eyes, and felt defeated yet again. I stood up and figured, what’s worse than asking my mother to change the diaper that I just wet that she is making me wear. I picked up the pacifier, put it back in my mouth, and walked toward the living room. It was just mom sitting on the couch, she was reading a magazine and the late show was on.
“Hi mom.” She looked up at me. She seemed satisfied with my attire. I didn’t want to sit down, I just stood there staring at her. There was no way I was going to be able to muster the words to ask her to change my now wet diaper. She kept looking at me. “Yes?..………” she replied.
“Do I have to say it mom?” That’s all I could think to say, I really did not want to have to say what I needed her to do. Why couldn’t I just do it myself?
“What do you need Megan?”
“I need a change.” That felt better than saying the words diaper, and wet and all the other infantile words that I could have said.
“Megan, I will come and check on you whenever it’s time for a changing. From my understanding, you didn’t let Ashley just be changed whenever she needed it.”
I could only think how unfair that was. I remembered all the times that I had changed her as soon as I found out she was wet or messy. “Mom, that is not true. I always changed her quickly.”
“Well I will be in your room in a little bit, just go back in there, or you can sit down here and watch the rest of the show with me.”
I was appalled. Why wouldn’t she just change me? It’s not like she was doing anything at all important. There was no way I was going to sit, I could already feel the back of the diaper sagging from the filling it just took against my upper thighs. I decided to walk back to my room. The feeling of the wet diaper stuck around me was a tough thing to accept. I wanted to just rip off the tapes, but I was more fearful of what would happen. I decided to just sit down on my bed and wait.
When I sat down I felt so disgusting, I could feel the wetness spread across and throughout my loins. It was still warm, I can’t think of anything grosser that I have had to deal with my entire life. I just sat there sucking on my pacifier, sitting in my wet diaper, waiting for my mother to come and change me. The sucking on the pacifier added to the humility, as though I was a child too young to have thoughts for myself. I have never felt this ashamed, or this alone in my life.
I looked over at my clock, only 7 minutes had passed, it was now 12:26. I figured mom wasn’t going to come in here until her show was over at 1:00. I wasn’t really sure what else I should do. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I turned, with pacifier still in mouth, and looked at my night stand. I had gotten The Ultimate Gift, a book earlier that month and had not gotten to read it yet. I figured what better way to pass the time, then to do some good old fashioned reading. I scooted over to the night stand, picked up the brown book and laid down. I was getting every opportunity to understand what a wet diaper would feel like in every way as I moved. I leaned up against my headboard, with my knees bent up to my chest, and started reading. I decided I should keep the pacifier in my mouth, no point in letting mom get upset with me over something so petty. I practiced sucking on it, and moving it around with my tongue. It still felt very foreign.
I got through the first three chapters and managed to keep my mind off my current situation. It was a nice break from reality until mom knocked on my door. In fact, you could almost say I had forgotten about my reality until the knocking occurred. Mom peered in the doorway and gave a slight smile. I assume she was pleased with what she saw. I was sucking on a pacifier and sitting in a wet diaper just like she wanted me to I guess. She came over, and sat down on the edge of my bed. “Megan, I appreciate that you are following our new rules. I can not begin to tell you how upset I was when I found out everything that you did to Ashley. I just want you to know, that if you keep following the rules, you may get out of diapers before school starts. But don’t think I won’t keep you in these if you try anything funny. I expect you to never take your diapers off at any point, and I expect you to be the perfect model of good behavior for your little sister the rest of this summer.”
My heart dropped again, the thought of starting my senior year of high school diapered really scared me. I still wasn’t sure how serious mom’s threats were, but there was no point in finding out. I just nodded my head as though I understood, I didn’t even bother to say anything as I was still pacified.
“Well let’s get you changed so you can get some sleep.”
And with that mom went over to my underwear drawer, pulled out another diaper and some wipes and returned to my bed. I scooted, more like slid, down my bed to the laying position. I just kept sucking on my pacifier looking up at my ceiling. I could hear the tapes that kept me trapped in my own pee being pulled away. I could feel the cold air as the front of the diaper was pulled back and then I could feel the back of the diaper being tugged as she was pulling the diaper out from under me. I took that as my cue to lift up my bottom so she could get it out.
Once the diaper was out from under me, I felt two cold wipes being moved around my most secretive spots. This really was the most embarrassing thing that could happen to me. I could hear the new diaper being unfolded and mom asked me to lift my butt as she slid the diaper underneath me. I was soon to be trapped again in another babyish diaper.
I just laid there through the whole thing. Paying attention to the senses around me. I suppose I should get used to it, but I wasn’t really sure how I was suppose to get used to such a silly and infantile thing. All I could really think was how ridiculous this whole thing was. When mom was done, she told me good night and turned off the light switch at my door, as though she didn’t think I would keep reading. I figured I would prefer to sleep anyway.
I took out my pacifier and set it on my night stand. Rolled over onto my side and pulled my covers back over me. The still foreign crinkling diaper stuck to my every move. This wasn’t the sort of thing I wanted to get used to. Before I knew it, I was asleep.
My eyes started to flicker open with the invading brightness that was entering my bedroom. A few brief moments later, I started to realize that it was morning, as usual and typical as they all are. The immediate moment of sadness comes as I realize my wonderful sleep was now over. I looked over at my clock, it said 8:23. Obviously this is too early to be up on a summers day. I raised my arms up over my head to begin stretching and then I feel the bulkiness of a diaper trapped around my loins. Not that it was a surprise or anything, but it was a reminder of how this was hell. If i could just go back in time, I would go back three days and make sure Ashley wasn’t diapered when mom came home that day. It certainly was more fun to have Ashley be my baby sister, not me.
My loins felt sweaty from the heat the diaper kept trapped in. Whenever I would move I would be reminded of the diaper as it crinkles and the bulk of it, as it keeps my legs slightly further apart then they may always want to be. I decide I might as well get up. I don’t think i could possibly sleep any longer even if I wanted to, although a decent strategy could be to stay in bed all weekend. I’m feeling hungry anyway, might as well get up. I pull back the covers and see immediately the brightness of the incredibly pearl white diaper stuck around my waist. I start to stare at it as I pull my legs over the side of the bed, hating it more and more the more I realize that I am not even allowed to take it off. I stand up and head over to my closet. On the walk, I remember mom told me I couldn’t wear anything else……but I certainly can’t walk around the house topless. Maybe I can just throw on a t-shirt and go ask her what I can wear for the day. Maybe she will have a change of heart this morning.
I find a huge white t-shirt from a summer camp last year that is like 4 sizes too large and decide it is the best choice. As I pull it over my head, it easily covers my diaper and goes half way down my thighs toward my knees. I look over at my clock only to notice the blue pacifier still sitting there. I decide I should at least have that in my mouth if I was going to try to wear a t-shirt. I pick it up, stick it back in my mouth, only to feel it’s great invasion in my mouth. It feels more like a gag, filling my whole mouth.
I head down stairs, wondering who would be up, how different today might be from last night, and what I can possibly do today since I will be diapered all day I’m sure.
I walk into the kitchen and the only person in there is Ashley, sitting at the table eating cereal. She is sitting in the chair at the end kicking her feet. She is too short to even reach the floor while sitting, she looks very happy just eating her breakfast. When she notices me, she just looks, pauses, smiles, and then returns her attention back to her breakfast. I guess seeing me with a pacifier in my mouth doesn’t surprise her at all. I don’t bother to say anything, and since mom isn’t in the kitchen, I take out the paci and set it on the counter as I go to pick out my breakfast for the day.
I decided on Pop-Tarts, had not had them in awhile, and go to sit down at the table next to Ashley. I am positive that she can hear my diaper rustling as I move to sit down, but she never says a word. I mumble a little ‘good morning’ to her, which she responds the same at the same volume. The awkwardness that ensues the rest of our silent breakfast is almost unbearable. Ashley finishes her breakfast, carries it over to the sink and sets her bowl in. And she walks out to the living room and turns on the tv. Not a word said. I guess I could be grateful, she could be gloating, or rubbing this into my face. And we certainly bonded better when she was the baby and I had the upper hand and control. Now it was just weird. I don’t like not being the person in control between the two of us. It’s frustrating and infuriating. I am 9 years older than her, I am the big sister, the position I am in, when you compare to where we were a week ago is dramatically different.
I finish my food, and head over to the sink. I start doing the dishes and didn’t even realize that I was doing them until I was about half way done.
I heard mom walking down the hallway toward the kitchen. I quickly reached over, grabbed the paci and put it back in my mouth. No point in risking anything. She comes into the kitchen and walks right over to me. She lifts up the back of my t-shirt. My first reaction is that she is probably taking it off, I was guessing she would have a problem with it, since it was against her specific rule last night. I start to say something, only to realize that I am still gagged by my pacifier. I reach up to my mouth to pull out the paci so I can defend myself when I notice that her hand stopped raising my t-shirt and her other hand was pulling back the top of my diaper. Was she really checking my diaper like when I checked Ashley to see if she had pooped?!
“Mom!” I replied in a loud shock.
“Megan, I am just checking to see if you still have clean pants on. I don’t want you to get a diaper rash.” She replied to me as though this was the most natural thing ever. She patted my butt twice and then dropped the back of t-shirt before I could say a word. “You know you need to use that diaper for both numbers 1 and 2.”
I don’t know what was more humiliating, my mother saying number 2, or the action that she just did. But both were new lows that my mom had not done to me in years. I wanted to reply, I needed to defend myself, I needed to keep some level of maturity and self respect.
“Mom, I think I will know if I have used my diaper.” That is all I could think to say. Not really the gold winning reply I could have hoped for.
I was pleased that she didn’t seem bothered by my t-shirt, as she went on with her morning routine of getting things done in the kitchen and reading the paper.
“I will still be checking Megan” that was the reply that I would have to live with.
The running water of the sink was making me need to go to the bathroom. Out of almost sheer reaction and natural history, I was subconsciously thinking of going to use the restroom after finishing…before i remembered that wasn’t an option.
When I finished the dishes, I turned to my mom still standing next to me, but she was reading the lifestyles section of the paper. I wanted to defend myself in some ways. And I wanted to see if there could be a possibility that she had had a change of heart, of course, after checking me like she did, I wasn’t so optimistic. “Mom, what are your plans for the day?”
“Well Megan, I was thinking we should go shopping for some clothes for your sister, and some clothes that will work your new underwear better. There are some new outlet malls that I want to check out.”
I knew what outlet malls she was referring to, it was a new project that had just finished on the outskirts of town along the highway. I had been wanting to go, but with my friends of course. I had a reply left over though.
“Well mom, do you think that in public, we could go without the diapers? I was thinking, it would be fair if I only had to wear them while at home, since Ashley didn’t have to wear them 24/7.”
I was sort of hoping, but surely she can give a bone on something.
“Megan, I know how you bought her swim diapers and made her wear diapers at a public pool. Do you really think I am going to let you not be in public with your diapers? Now quit asking for favors. You are doing this.”
I just sighed and decided to walk back to my room and hide forever under my sheets. As I walked off, I heard mom say, and take off that t-shirt, no clothes while you are home. I felt this was absurd, dad and Ashley walked around the house, we didn’t keep the window blinds closed all the time and that overall, this was just unfair.
“Mom! that isn’t fair, I don’t want dad seeing my boobs, and I don’t want Ashley seeing me naked. I should at least get a shirt.”
“Megan, you father has to work all day today and tomorrow, they are catching up on file backing at work, so it’s just you, Ashley and I. You will be fine.”
And with that, I just stormed off to my room, taking off the t-shirt and throwing it on the floor in the hallway. I figured if she is going to make me look like a baby, I can at least act like a baby.
I storm off into my room, and rush under the covers….feeling the need to pee, and the familiar feeling of my normal morning BM was coming. All I could do was bury my head into my pillow and cry.
I just laid in my bed, curling up, pulling me knees up to my chest. I couldn’t really bother to cry anymore, it was starting to get exhausting.
I had a new dilemma, but all I could think about was poor Ashley. There was a mixture of emotions. The self serving concern has me upset that mom is making me do this and how humiliating it is, but there is also the aspect where I am greatly concerned about what I may have done to my sister, what her opinion is of me right now, and how awful of a big sister I must have been. I keep justifying it to myself that she was enjoying it as much as I was. It’s not like I was enjoying it in a sick, or weird way. It was just fun to have a baby sister. I want to be a mother one day, and it was just a lot of fun……but what if I really hurt Ashley by doing all of that?
I decided I could hold my body’s call to nature for awhile longer, and I didn’t really want to think about what I was probably going to have to deal with.
I sat up on my bed, the reminder of my diaper crinkles as I move. I start to wonder if I should go and explain myself to Ashley, and maybe if I do, mom will let me out of these diapers and this ridiculous humiliation.
I start to get up, and the reminder of my stomach hits a little harder. But I have to hold it at school all the time anyway, I know I can make it awhile before I have to face the issue at hand.
I look around my room, I feel so exposed not being allowed to have a shirt on. I don’t feel comfortable naked to begin with. Out of habit, I cover my breast with my arms by folding them, pick back up my pacifier and decide I should go and find Ashley. I don’t want her to see what I look like, but hell, she already knows anyway. Either way, I know I need to make things right with her.
I walk out of my bedroom, assuming Ashley must be in her room down the hall. I hear my diaper swishing as I walk. With the silence of me walking, it’s the only thing that can heard down the hall. I knock gently on Ashley’s door, and she is laying on her stomach on her bed reading a book.
“Ash, whatcha reading?”
She doesn’t look up at me, which is probably a good thing
“Thomas the Bunny.”
I decide I can start the conversation going if I develop further into her book.
“What is it about? Who is Thomas?”
She replies “Thomas is a super hero bunny sent to protect his family from the evil owls that keep eating their food.”
I sort of chuckle, thinking that is a really dumb story line….but then again, I know she is 8, and that is probably what she likes anyway.
“Can I sit?” I ask her sort of meekly.
She looks up at me, I guess sort of wondering why I am in her room to even begin with. “Free country.”
So I sit and decide I might as well just say what I am thinking. “Ashley, I am really sorry if what we did this summer hurt you. It wasn’t fair to you that I put you through all of this. I was just having fun, and I honestly thought you were enjoying it too.”
“Yeah, well I wasn’t” as she continues reading her book, or at least staring at it.
I was sort of shocked by this response, I didn’t think it really upset her that much.
“I’m just really sorry Ashley. I loved feeling like I had a baby sister again. It was fun being in charge like that. And I’m just sorry, I don’t want things to be different, or weird between us. What can I do to make things better?”
Ashley didn’t respond for a minute, I could tell she was thinking. She was always such a methodical thinker, she always took her time and analyzed situations before speaking, much the opposite of me. “I want you to stick with being the baby like I had to be. I want you to do it, and quit making excuses. Just do it, and quit looking for an easy way out.”
Harsh, that is all I could think. I must have really hurt her through everything. Of course it’s probably what I deserved, whether I feel like it’s really fair or not, I guess it just doesn’t matter.
“Ok.” That is all I could respond.
I decide I can at least lighten the mood…so I start talking a little more.
“So were your diapers as hot as these? My bottom is so sweaty from all the heat.”
“Not really, wearing them wasn’t so bad, it was other people knowing, and having to use them that sucked the most.”
I completely understood where she was coming from on this one. “Well is there anything I can do for you now?”
“Naw, but maybe put on a shirt.” and she sort of laughed with that one.
I figured I could probably see the humor in it as well, it was probably just as uncomfortable for her to see me topless, as it was for me to be topless.
“I wish mom would let me.” I thought about saying that she could tell mom that she thinks that way, but she also just told me no easy ways out. Maybe I’ll wait to ask that later.
I heard down the hall mom was calling for me. I shouted I’ll be right there and stood up. I looked back at Ashley, and I wanted her to know how genuine I was. I said, “Ashley” and waited for her to look up at me, “I really am sorry if I hurt you at all.” And walked out of her room to find mom.
I started down the hall and I could see mom was looking inside the doorway to my room. Not sure what she wanted I said “Right here mom, I was in Ashley’s room talking to her.”
She looked back at me “Okay, well I want to see if your dress will fit you alright before we head out to the mall.”
I looked up at her, thinking about what I would need to do soon enough. I said, “Hey mom, I have a sort of issue, can I use the bathroom before we go so we don’t have any problems?”
I could tell by her facial expression that her answer would be no even before she spoke. “Megan, absolutely not, how many times will I have to tell you that that isn’t an option? You will use your diaper for everything for the next two months at the very least. If you make things harder on me at all, or your sister, it will be longer. Now let’s get you dressed for shopping.”
Damnit, that is all I could think. I can’t think of any possible way to get out of this. I wanted to just take my diaper off and use the toilet. It was the most natural thing I could think of doing. I also knew I would have to use it before too long, because there is no way I would be able to last a full day of shopping without pooping. Why couldn’t I just use the toilet like a normal person! I was basically screaming in my own head….and the whole time, the one person keeping me from the toilet is standing in front of me waiting for me to get to my room to change clothes.
I also have to pee, and after last nights long wait to be changed, I didn’t want to risk that as well. Especially in public, I started thinking about all the time’s that I changed Ashley in public, there is no way I could use the diaper in public and expect to be changed. I decided the best option, was to use my diaper before we left the house. Now the only question is how? How am I supposed to just use it so quickly?
I walked into my bedroom and sit on my bed. Mom starts looking through my closet where I guess she hung up at the clothes we bought yesterday at some point. I wasn’t even really sure what all she got yesterday, because I never paid any attention to it. I guess I was too distracted in my own world to even care.
I decided I should go ahead and try to use the diaper. So while mom was looking through my closet, I stepped off my bed, and went into the crouch next to my bed like I had last night so I could pee. I closed my eyes and tried to imagine the waterfall again like I did last night. No luck again, of course. I had my eyes closed while I was concentrating. I had that feeling that I was being watched but I didn’t want to open my eyes to see if my feeling was true. I just kept trying to pee. I started to get a small trickle, it wasn’t much, I kept straining to get it to come out, and finally it started to flow out of me. I could feel the warmth of the pee fill the diaper and touch the bottom or my butt. I peed and peed and it kept coming. I had to poop as well, but it wouldn’t come. And I wasn’t so sure I wanted to poop. I just didn’t want to face it. But I did get all of the pee out of me. I opened my eyes, and looked to my right to see my mother standing there, staring at me. I didn’t know what to say, I just blushed. She was looking at me, and never said a word. I sat back up on my bed and just stared at the floor in a very long and ashamed manner. The feeling of my pee spread throughout my diaper as it started to soak it all up.
Mom was holding a dress of some sort and walked over to me, I just knew it was orange. She told me to hold my arms up, which I did, and she dressed me like I was a toddler not capable of doing it myself. I just sat there, letting my mother dress me as I sat in my wet diaper as though I really was a toddler. The humiliation of the wet diaper was bad, and being dressed wasn’t any better. She pulled the dress down to my waist, picked out a different pacifier, it was also orange, and popped it into my mouth. I just went with it, nothing I could say or do, I just went through the humiliation of being completely babied.
I was so busy getting over the fact that I was being babied like I was, I had forgotten that she wasn’t changing me. I looked up at her, still sucking on my pacifier. I was starting to get pretty good at sucking on it actually. Mom continued to mess with things, I looked down at the floor at what she was putting things into, I realized it was a diaper bag. I couldn’t believe it. A diaper bag. I grabbed my pacifier so I could speak, “Mom, we don’t need a diaper bag.”
She looked back at me, I quickly put the pacifier back in my mouth, the feeling of it filling my entire mouth. “How else do you suppose we should pack your diapers, and changing supplies and other stuff?”
I didn’t bother to argue. This must be some bad dream. I was just having a hard time coping with everything.
I just sat there and watched as I saw her pack several diapers, pacifiers, wipes, even a changing pad.
I didn’t say anything about being changed, I didn’t want to bother. It felt disgusting to sit in my own pee, and she obviously knew I had been peeing, and I’m sure she could see that it was wet when she put on my dress.
Mom grabbed the diaper bag and walked out of my bedroom, she didn’t say a word, again. She had been doing that a lot lately. I stood up, pulled the dress down over my diaper and turned to look in the mirror. It was way too obvious that I was diapered. You could tell very easily, especially with how short the dress was. Anyone that had any idea what they were seeing would certainly know that I was diapered. And then I looked back at my face. I pulled my dark hair into a pony tail and just kept sucking on my pacifier. I was hoping she would at least let me take the pacifier out in public, otherwise there wouldn’t be a question that I was diapered.
I sat there staring at myself in the mirror, the need to poop was growing stronger, and mom had not even bothered to change my wet diaper. I started to wonder if I was supposed to follow her or something, before she returned to my room.
I just continued to sit there in my wet diaper, hoping mom would at least change me and just hoping in my own head for a chance to use the toilet, my stomach wasn’t appreciating the longer than normal hold.
Mom started talking while zipping up the diaper bag that I had used on Ashley, “Well looks like we have everything ready, if you are a good girl and don’t talk until we get to the malls I might let you take your pacifier out.”
I was more than a little frustrated. I could feel the dampness of my wet diaper, for some reason it felt more disgusting then it did last night. Mom picked up my diaper bag and headed out my bedroom door turning off my light switch on her way out. I guess that was my sign to follow her. I stood up, straightened out my dress and starred at myself in the mirror, sucking on my pacifier. This was a site I was going to have to get used to i guess. I figured I could force myself to not think about the growing cramps inside of me, and I just headed out the door to follow mom to the garage.
I hopped into the front seat, buckled my seat belt, and felt the exposure of the pacifier as I realized that on lookers would be able to see it if they looked in the car at me. Ashley got into the back seat, I could see she had one of her sticker books with her, she loved those things.
Mom turned on the radio and started backing out of the drive way. The pacifier was feeling exposed even more so as daylight entered it’s ugly head into the passenger seat along with me. We started down the road, and I was lucky we didn’t have to sit at any stop lights or stop signs long enough for anyone to notice me. I could see people, but no one seemed to look at me, I suppose everyone else has other stuff going on to not notice a teenager with a pacifier in their mouths in a car.
We got onto the highway, and whenever we would pass a car, I would turn and face mom so that whoever we were passing wouldn’t be able to see me. By the time we got to the outlet mall, mom found a parking spot, I felt like no one had seen me and that this whole thing maybe wouldn’t be so bad. As soon as we parked, I noticed a woman in front of our car getting into her car, and she saw me, and definitely did a double take. Thirty minutes of perfection, and one woman certainly noticed. I think she was just curious if what she saw was true or not, I was fortunate enough to be able to turn around toward Ashley in the back seat in time before realizing what and how much she really saw.
Mom turned off the car, looked at me “think you can behave and be a good girl all afternoon?”
I just nodded my head, and with that she pulled out my pacifier and stuck it in the diaper bag. “If you aren’t perfectly behaved, you are getting this pacifier back.”
A slight sigh of relief came over. We got out of the car, and I realized I just made it thirty minutes without thinking about my need to go number two. We got out of the car, and I made sure my dress was pulled down enough that no one would get a glimpse of my wet diaper. I smoothed out my dress, hearing the crinkle of the diaper beneath and faced my mother to see where we were going. She waited for Ashley and started toward a Nine West store. I was thrilled to see we had one, I loved their shoes and purses. But that wouldn’t matter until I was out of diapers much, right now, I wouldn’t want anybody to see me at all, a nice purse and nice shoes would only bring me minimal comfort.
I was very aware of the crinkle of my diaper and the amount that it wrinkled through my dress, but in reality, no one else probably could see it or hear it. The feeling of it being wet was very noticeable, in fact, I was quite sure that it was now thicker because of the wetting.
We did some shopping, and I started getting into it after a little bit, Ashley seemed to be more bored than I was, she was keeping herself entertained with her sticker book and didn’t seem to care much about what we were getting until mom bought some nail polish for herself. It reminded me of how badly she kept asking me to paint her nails constantly, I missed that attention from her.
We kept going through store after store before my cramps started to become unbearable. They started to physically hurt. We were going through the Nike store and while looking at jogging pants the pain became too much and I bent over in pain trying to hold it. I realized there was nothing else I could do. I started toward the bathroom, leaving Mom and Ashley behind, I was half running, half speed walking my way there while trying to keep my butt clinched. I got into the bathroom, ran into a stall and shut the stall door, and crouched over onto the toilet keeping my diaper on. I knew I had to keep it on, so I did and just let it all out. The speed of the poop was intense, it came out as quickly as it ever had before, and I could feel myself peeing the whole time as well. It just kept happening, and I could feel the top of my diaper tugging from the new space being taken up as the poop smeared around my butt.
I could hear the bathroom door open and it was definitely Mom’s voice calling out my name.
I stated claim of where I was and started crying into my hands, she opened the stall door that I had never locked and I didn’t bother to look up at Mom standing there. I think she may have been mad until she realized that I had kept my diaper on and didn’t actually use the toilet.
“I’m sorry mom, I didn’t want to poop out there, I had to have some semblance of privacy.”
“I understand Meg, but you don’t get that luxury anymore. From the smell of things I take it you need a change.”
That was for certain, I don’t think there is any room left in my diaper, I can feel the waste in the front and the back and all around me. I have never felt this disgusting in all my life.
Mom pulled out the diaper bag in the stall next to me, the handicapped one and laid down a changing pad and instructed me to lay down. I couldn’t believe she was actually going to change my messy diaper, right here, in the ladies room, at a Nike outlet store. Me, a popular near adult, who had everything going for her, would have to have her messy diaper changed by her mother in public.
This was a memory to forget.
Mom finishes up changing my disgusting diaper. I just cover my face with both hands, I can’t let myself cry anymore, and yet, I can’t even face the reality that this is happening. That has to be the most disgusting thing I have ever endured in my life. I know I can’t bring myself to face my mother after all that. I can feel the new diaper being pulled up, trapping my loins inside the clothing hell that is now my diaper. Mom pulls me up off the floor, and lowers my dress back over the new diaper. She never says a word, which is a sort of blessing, as I never even make eye contact with her. I suppose I should be mad at her, but I am still struggling with the realization and reality of what I am enduring. And I am not so sure I should even complain, as I did make Ashley go through all of this already.
Once we walk out of the stall, I look around assuming Ashley must be somewhere close, but she wasn’t. “Mom, where is Ashley?” I asked slightly concerned.
“She is sitting on a chair outside the bathroom reading her books, she didn’t want to come in here.”
I don’t know if I should be embarrassed to hear that from mom, obviously Ashley knows what is going on, and it’s not like it’s news to her, but i