Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

I know, you may be annoyed with me making three parts. Every time I leave for a very long time, I find I have to start a new part because my writing develops a bit more with each new part. This isn’t a chapter however. This is technically a teaser, or a small prologue for the chapters to come. And don’t worry, for those of you who fear this will fall into the usual ABDL story.

Part One:
http://abdlstoryforum.info/forums/index.php/topic,4053.0.html

Part Two:
http://abdlstoryforum.info/forums/index.php/topic,4457.0.html

Nightmare

Part 3: Tender Whimpers

Fallen Pieces(Opening to part 3)

Almost a whole month since and Saul hasn’t touched me once.

I don’t understand it at all. How could you sneak a kiss on someone and not try to be by them more? I can’t tell if he’s trying to make me over think things, or just honestly is trying to start over again.

In one way, I’m scared to death since nothing has happened. In another way, I’m happy I have my own space and my own body for the time being. I can’t tell if he hasn’t done anything because his parents came home, or the fact that he’s just trying to get to the day where I’m just not on watch then comes up behind me and snatches me.

It’s weird how in one minute you can go from so delighted to miserable. The kiss wasn’t that bad I guess. Soft but with a hint of temptation. I just wasn’t ready for it. I didn’t know he liked me in anyway. He was treating me like a baby; I don’t understand how you can like someone as a girlfriend but baby them. That’s two mixed things.

At school he sends me mixed messages. He wants me to sit at his table, but we don’t talk. I’ll catch his eyes trained on me with some sort of weird thought going through his mind. Some days I’ll skip lunch but he never says one thing to me about it. I thought I could figure guys out so damn easily. But Saul doesn’t even come close to that statement, not even one bit.

I just lay here, on my bed just thinking all these things about Saul. I sit up and look at my alarm. Great, 12 o’clock. God I wish I wasn’t such a sleep insomniac. Maybe warm milk might put me to sleep… Nope. But I do need to go to the restroom. I stumble a bit, but manage to turn on my light. I open my door and head to the restroom. I flick on the light and confusion spreads on my face.

Why do I find myself in the schools bathroom suddenly? The lights are flickering. I turn around and head back out of the door into the school hallway leading to the auditorium. The schools dimmed but I can still see. It’s dark outside. I go to the exit doors and try opening them. Absolutely no luck there.

I slowly look around. There’s some lights to hallways flickering, others not. I hear crowds screaming. A shot of fear goes through me and I realize that there are people in the auditorium. I walk over to the auditorium doors and try to open one. Nothings opening. I get frustrated and begin walking to the opposite way the bathrooms were. The noise coming from the auditorium starts to scare me as I go farther away from it.

I begin walking down a hallway. As I make my way down it, I see a dark figure walk past the hallway I’m in. I instantly stop. I try not to make any noise but for some reason a squeal comes out of me. I cover my mouth with both hands and slowly near the end of the hallway. I creep to a corner and look around. A sigh escapes my lips as I walk to the cafeteria. For some reason, I’m hungry and the smell of milk and cookies attracts me to it.

The doors are closed to the cafeteria, and I stop dead in my tracks, just wondering why I’m doing these things without further thinking things through. That’s when I say, “I’m dreaming? No… This isn’t a dream… [i]This is a…?” I couldn’t finish the sentence, because I feel some ones strong hand cupping my shoulder. I shiver, but the name doesn’t visualize until I look behind me. Salve.

I hear a deep chuckle and find myself being whisked away to the auditorium. I begin crying for no reason at all. Then to find out that I wet myself once again. Everything becomes a blur.[/i]

I wake up wailing, realizing nothing happened, besides the fact that my sheets are awfully wet. I pinch myself to make sure I’m really up. This is the first time in about a month I’ve wet my bed. Making this Thursday feel like it’s just going to be a horrible day.

The only good thing about today is that it’s the first day of October and of a four day weekend off of school. October’s my favorite month of the year. I love fall weather and October falls right into the season. I honestly never have celebrated Halloween though. Never went Trick-or-Treating. Never went to a Halloween Party. Never did anything for October 31st but watch a scary movie.

My alarm goes off just as I come back to my room from putting my sheets in the washer. I guess I’ll just take a shower with only a half an hour to spare. I take a quick shower and apply some mascara. Then I’m off to school after pinning my hair to the side.

By the time I get to the school parking lot, I look in the side view mirror to find a flushed, hollow girl staring back. Her face heart shaped and her eyes lost in a green forest. Light brown hair, wet but lightly curled in a mess around her head. The girl is alone in the world; obviously needing someone to help her before she flakes apart in the next moment. I can’t keep looking at her or else we’ll both break down together.

I get out of my car and look at the time on my new Iphone. Fifteen more minutes until the final morning bell. Why do I always come so early on the days that I don’t need to be? I lean against my car and sigh. I just need a little more sleep, of course without being interrupted by a nightmare.

I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do when I get inside, considering I don’t need to go to my locker, so I think I’ll just sit in my car and listen to music. Yeah. I like that idea. I open my car door and slide back in. I take out my headphones then pull the lever of my chair so the incline goes all the way back. Closing my eyes, I’m resting. Almost falling back to sleep and then I feel a cool air come into my car.

My eyes open wide to find Saul sitting there, just watching me, with that warming smile he likes to tease me with. I take the headphones out of my ears and realize how loud they were. I try sitting back up, to only find myself being pushed back down, “Rest, babygirl. You look like you need it.” He’s basically cooing me? Why?

“Buh-? Wah?” I was trying to get out something and then tears began rolling down my cheeks.
I found myself in Saul’s arms quicker than I thought possible. My face buried deep into his chest, trying to hide myself. But from what? My shame? My sadness? My need for someone besides my own self?

“I know. I know. Shh, shh. Shhh.” Saul cooing me calmed me down a lot.

“How about we go inside and you go to the bathroom, splash some water on your face and I’ll see you in third hour, okay?” He tilted my chin up to his face, wiping a tear away from my eye with his finger. He kissed my forehead and opened the car door. We both get out of my car and walk, hand-in-hand, inside of the school to the girls bathroom.

I didn’t realize how the need for releasing my bladder built up so badly. I went pee and then splashed cool water on my face. I checked my phone to see I only had about five more minutes left. I walked back to my class alone since Saul’s first hour was on the other side of the school.

My whole first hour was basically me wondering, “What the hell just happened?” I don’t understand it. We’re constantly becoming adult and baby, and then in the next second girlfriend and boyfriend. Not really the second one too much, but there’s something in his eyes I catch. I don’t know why in the moment I’ll curl up in his lap and cry, yet afterwards I never get what gave me the right to do that. I should hate him for giving me a nightmare, not show him my vulnerable state.

I can’t help but blame myself for it all though. I honestly don’t even know myself, so why should I be making any conclusions to what I should be doing? I’m so confused and it’s a never ending cycle. I thought I was unbreakable metal that couldn’t be touched, yet I show vulnerability in a break of a second? I thought I’d kill Salve if I ever met him in real life, yet I bury my deepest emotions into his shirt? I thought I’d never like a guy, yet…? No. I’m not beginning to like Saul. That can’t be right. I’m just thinking too much. Forget it.

The bell made a shiver go down my spine, but at least Drawing was next hour. Then comes Health with Saul in third hour. I haven’t decided if I’m excited or not to see him yet.

Drawing goes by in a seconds worth of time and I’ve spaced out so badly today that I find myself walking to my locker to put an unfinished art project away that I’ll have to finish later tonight. Just my luck, I pass Saul and have to once again walk to my locker with him. He instantly locks eyes with me and slowly creeps beside me like I’m his prey.

“Here, I’ll hold that for you.” Saul holds out his hand to my rolled up art project. I just give it to him, since I’m so drained to not even try to say I can hold it.

Of course he unrolls it, which I knew he would do. When we get to my locker, he’s still staring at it. It’s just a realistic self portrait. I don’t know why, but every school I’ve gone too, in every 2D or Drawing class we always have to do self portraits. I’d say this one it the best I’ve done.

“Damn. Heather, I don’t mean to offend you, but I didn’t know you could draw. This looks almost exactly like you, no more like exactly like you…” He glances at me with that serious glimmer in his eyes then back to the drawing, “This is the first of your drawings I’ve ever seen, besides a little coloring…” He chuckles a little while shaking his head, “Are you taking it home to finish it?” Saul gives me a demanding look.

“Yea, it’s due when we get back on Tuesday. I just have to finish shading some parts. But thanks, I guess.” I look into my locker like I need a book. When in actuality I just don’t want to stare up into his eyes.

“You guess?” He begins rolling it back up. “Well it’s quite beautiful, you probably hear this about yourself a lot but you have some real talent in art. If the teacher acknowledges your art, you can be moved to the 4th hour Advanced Drawing class which is what I’m taking right now. It’s a college credit class too. I know you draw better than half of the kids in Advanced, that’s for sure. But you can finish it when we hang out tonight.” Saul places the project in my locker and closes it before I can even move.

I just drop my jaw, wondering what that means. The way he ended the sentence just left me with a sudden chill. Saul looked down at me and then decided to take my hand firmly and guide me to class past all of the teens staring at us. I think Saul liked the attention of looking like we were dating because when I glanced up at him, he had a crooked grin lightly placed on his face.

After that, the day basically was a blur of me spacing out thinking of one thing to the next and by the time 7th hour rolled around I just wanted to cuddle in a blanket and sleep. I just don’t know anything anymore. I wonder if Saul knew I’d over think everything by him just saying one sentence. I wonder everyday if he just does one little thing so he can make me over think what he just said or did. Does he know that when I space out I’m really just thinking too hard or does he think I’m just too tired? Or does he think that I’m just having my own little toddler moments? And why do I even care what he thinks? God I’ve been in a different world lately.

When I walked into 7th hour I found everyone sitting in different seats. I guess there’s a new seating chart. I look at the front board and try to find where I’m sitting. Then I feel someone taking my hand and guiding me to my seat. Who would’ve guessed I’d see Saul sit right next to me.

I just let a small cheerless sigh out and looked up at the board to make sure this was my true seat. Unfortunately, Saul was right, like usual. I find it awesome how the desks are now partnered up so you can easily elbow the person sitting next to you. Great, closer and closer I get to Saul each day.

I fixed my eyes on the desk and spaced out on the board almost the whole class. When Saul caught me spacing, he’d tickle my side. It happened about 4 times and I squealed on one the last time. It was a small squeal but the people in front of us turned around. I just blushed and looked down. Saul just looked out the window like nothing happened. I hope the seats get switched sometime soon, or else my sides are going to hurt by the end of the semester.

The bell finally rang and off we went to my locker. I couldn’t help but feel Saul lightly caress the back of my hand with his thumb. It soothed me in a way, even though I was panicking inside. I didn’t know what Saul had in store for me later. I know he wasn’t ever going to hurt me, but I didn’t want to be spanked or publicly humiliated. That was the line he hasn’t crossed yet.

“So, how about you drive your little self home, get some overnight things packed, and I’ll pick you up in a half an hour.” Saul said it a gentle voice. I just nodded my head and grabbed my art project. Saul took the project out of my hand and said, “I’ll just take this to my house since we’re going to end up there anyway. I’ll see you in a half an hour, baby girl.” Saul winked at me then left with my project. Now I can’t even escape from going to his house tonight. That’s just awesome. He even managed to belittle me in the process.

I did what he said and made it home. I was thinking of what to bring for pajamas, and just decided on my fuzzy pink hello kitty pajama pants. It’s cold at his house at night. And how can he make me sleep without pants when my pajamas have already met his cute standards?

It kind of just hits me that I find myself attempting to meet Saul’s standards he sets for me. How far will I lose my mind by tomorrow? Jesus Christ, where is my mind going lately. Do I really want to be dependent on someone else? Do I really look like I’m that much of a mess? Do I really like being babied? As I’m getting my clothes and my makeup packed, I stumble in the bathroom for deodorant. I stop dead in my tracks and have to look at the girl I saw earlier.

She looks better. I mean, she looks confused, but better. She looks so hollow. So cold. So drained. So needy. Yet there’s some fire in her eyes that constantly wants to say no. When, you can obviously see she just wants, no needs, someone’s love. The unconditional love she only had for a few years. The unconditional love she can’t remember. A tear breaks over her tear duct and more tears follow.

This girl is me. I’m messed up. I’m broken. I need someone. But does Saul know what he’s getting into by taking care of me? Does he know just how much I could fall into one severely dependent being? Have I already fallen into those deep, horribly deep, depths?

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

I’ve finally been home this weekend. I actually hate writing but this story helps me so much. It’s really therapeutic for me to write this story. Takes down all the stress I once had. Anyways, since I’ve had so much time to write, here’s the first chapter of part three.

Chapter 10

I splashed fresh water on my face, coming to the conclusion that I’m done crying for the day. My head throbs and my nose is irritated from my wiping it. I look at the time finding Saul should be here any moment. I guess I could use some cuddle time on his lap anyways.

I hear a knock on my door and can only wonder who that is. By the time I get to the door, Saul has already opened it. He strides over to me, picking me up, swinging me around, and kissing me on my cheek. I can’t help to find myself giggling loudly.

He’s chuckling too, but then stops and gives me a serious inspection. His eyes slowly trail from my cheeks to my red rimmed eyes. Saul frowns, then gives me a pat on my butt and places me back on the ground.

“You packed yet? Or have you just been crying?” He gives me a gentle voice filled with concern. I just walk to my room to pick up my bag full of clothes, finding Saul is following me, with a book bag swinging around his arm. I guess I didn’t see the book bag when he came in.

Saul pats my bed, “Lay down, baby.” I look sluggishly at my bed and plop myself on it. I feel as if I’ll never be able to get up again as I lie down.

He begins taking supplies out of his bag as I just stare at him like I’ve never seen him before. I guess I’ve never really looked at Saul. Maybe it’s because I’ve always been to scared or maybe it’s because I never wanted to actually look at him but for once I saw the guy who was about to diaper me.

Saul was truly attractive, well, at least to me. He had short bronze hair, which could effortlessly be messy by just the wind touching it. His face was the right mix of sharp but soft at his nose, cheek bones and chin. Saul’s nose was straight with a small, almost imaginary, bump in the middle that nearly matched my nose. His lips, not too thin but tinted light blossom with one lick.

He sees me staring at him and his eyes glimmer with some hint of delight. Saul’s eyes, grey with little moss-green specs accompanied by traces of black eyelashes falling over his irises, were just hard not to gaze at. Those eyes speak words at times. They can be curious, hurt, analyzing, glistening, raging, and loving in just one split of a second. I can only guess what he really feels at times. His eyes have so many secrets. His eyes contain so many of my secrets.

Saul chuckles under his breath and tickles my tummy, “What are you staring at, little one?” I giggle lightly, covering my face with my arms.

That’s when I get the wrath of Saul’s tickle monster. I can’t stop laughing as he tickles my under pits and as I take my arms away from my face, he pins them down above my head. He stops a few seconds in and just lies there, propped on one elbow on my bed, just tracing his eyes along my face. I can’t help but stare back, squirming a little to get out of his grasp. He chuckles a bit more every failed squirm attempt.

“Better get a diaper on you before you wet yourself.” Saul releases my arms and begins unbuttoning my pants.

I’m not really a self conscious person, but maybe I should go shopping for big girl underwear one day soon because of all the embarrassing moments I’ve had with Saul changing me into a diaper. Of course it’s the day I decide to be comfy and wear pink cotton little kids panties with little hearts on the lining. It gets worse because then it occurs to me that these were the ones my aunt got me when I was in fifth grade that have the most embarrassing saying on the back.

My back stiffens and my face goes deep crimson red. Saul can’t help but trace the heart lining and chuckle softly, shaking his head in disbelief.

“You know, when you wear cute underwear like these, it makes me wonder why I’m changing you into a diaper.” He looks at my face while he pulls down my jeans. He tilts his head like he can see something on my bottom as he lifts my legs. “Here, stand up. I want to see the back.” I jinxed myself on that one. He’s never going to live this down.

I just lay there, folding my arms across my chest and staring at the ceiling. I’m not going to budge for him. This is the battle I will not let him win.

Saul sighs, “Is someone grumpy? Does someone want a spanking?” Okay, I’ve never had a spanking and I don’t want one today. Never mind, he wins.

I get up and try to keep my bottom facing his opposite direction. Saul shakes his head and takes my arms and makes me turn around.

“I’m a cutie.” As he reads out loud what it says he pinches my butt and I squeal. He’s chuckling the whole time yet all I can do is blush and hold my head down in shame. Then I’m back on my bed as he peels my undies off and unfolds the diaper.

Saul taps the side of my hips so I raise my hips a little and he slides it under. He’s already powdering my bottom and the next thing I know the tapes are secure and he’s playing with the guards of the diaper again. I try to hold my giggle but the inside of my thighs tickle too much. Unfortunately, from me holding in my giggle another squeal escapes me and Saul begins tickling me again.

My arms are pinned down and my tummy, sides, and under pits are being mercilessly tickled. After about five minutes of loud squealing and giggling I accidentally release my bladder a bit into my diaper. Saul continues for five more minutes and I’m spent of emotions.

Saul checks my diaper and decides I don’t need a change, “So I was thinking… Would you like to see a movie with me tonight?” He lightly traces around my tummy to the edge of my diaper.

I just lay there and look at him with my eyes heavy with sleeping dust. Saul sighs with a crooked smile, “Of course after your nap time. Don’t want my baby falling asleep during a movie.” He takes my quiet stare as a yes and begins putting away my diaper supplies. Then he looks in my overnight bag and takes out my Hello Kitty PJs. Saul is bringing them up my legs and I decide that I should stand before I fall asleep on my bed.

I was so sleepy I was already napping on the ride back to his house and before I knew it I was waking up, just snuggling my head into his chest. Saul had a warming smile on his face when I finally looked up at him.

“Hmm. Have a nice nap, babygirl?” I closed my eyes and cuddled a nod under his chin.

“Do you want to get ready in a bit to go to the movies?” I silently cuddled another nod. I could feel his light chuckling of my silly, tired state. I felt him get up and lay me down. That’s when I realized that my butt was cold and wet. Saul gave me a quick, gentle wiping, powdered me up and snuggled a diaper around my waist.

I just went in the bathroom, watered some medium sized frizzy curls down on my hair and applied some mascara and a bit of top eyeliner. My eyes looked bigger than usual, but I thought it was cute. Definitely different than the usual way I do my makeup. I try to look older, but now I looked, well, cuter. I liked it.

I guess Saul changed out of his comfy pants he was lounging in with me, and now into light jeans and a black long-sleeved thermal. It’s nice how he’s not ripped nor bony, but just the perfect way to be skinny with undertones of muscle. Not anywhere to scrawny, but he wasn’t fat. Not even close. More like medium sized to small, but extremely tall. I’d guess he’s 6’1 or 6’2. Could even be 6 feet exact for all I know. I’m pretty damn short compared to him though. I’d say I’m about one foot smaller, which makes him intimidating.

I’m not going to lie, that thermal on him really shows his nice flat chest and arms. It makes me wonder what a guy this handsome, is doing with someone who is the exact opposite: Tiny, cute, definitely not sexy, not ripped, not scrawny. I have some light chub on my thighs and tummy but I wouldn’t consider myself fat. I’m about five pounds over the underweight line at my height. Wait. Did I just call myself cute? It’s just the diaper talking now.

He gives me a sly smile, “Are you just going to wear a diaper and shirt to the movies? I mean…” He walks over to me and plays with the edge of my diaper. Man. Does he like doing that. “I like the wardrobe choice, but maybe something a bit older… Don’t you think?” His smile grows larger as I blush.

I waddle to my bag placed in his room, and squat down to see what I put in it. At least I put my light blue stonewashed skinny jeans in there. I got them out and slid them on, to find in was a hassle to button them. I finally got it buttoned up and then I got out my light grey knitted button up sweater and threw it on without feeling the need to button it up. I sprayed some Victoria Secrets body mist on that smelled like powder and orchids mixed. At least I looked and smelled like a normal teenager now.

I turn around to find Saul watching me on his bed. He motions for me to come to him so I did. He takes my sweater and buttons it up to where my low-ish black swoop neck begins. I feel like I planned this earlier wardrobe without knowing it since I have a light grey laced tank underneath. At least he smiles, looking content with what I’m wearing.

Saul takes his, well technically my, diaper bag with to the movies. Once we get there we decide on watching Snow White and the Huntsmen. I tell him I don’t want anything, but he gets popcorn and a large, no enormous Coca-Cola Icee for me anyways.

It comes to a point where I start to understand how different our heights are. I have to raise my hand to an uncomfortable position between my shoulder and my elbow when we hold hands wherever we go. It makes me feel so small, that I accidentally let some pee escape into my diaper… Again. I don’t get how feeling small always makes me wet myself but it does. Maybe it’s the belittling facts that make me want to curl up into a ball, or maybe its because I’m just that much of a baby. At least I’m wearing my comfiest sweater to cuddle into, I don’t care.

As we’re sitting there watching previews, Saul’s arm falls behind my neck. Then I begin wondering… Why did he take me here? Does he even like me? Is he just playing around with my emotions? Am I really girlfriend material for a guy like this? Do I even consider myself girlfriend material for anyone? Do I even know how to kiss a guy? Have I even made out with a guy? Is he expecting to go to third base with me? Does he know I never even plan on going that far? Have me and him ever even had a deep conversation? Who is the guy who has his arm around my neck?

Saul looks at me and kisses the side of my head. Then he nestles his nose into my hair. Little butterflies rise in my stomach and I have never felt this way before.

Honestly, I’ve never experienced these feelings before. The diaper snuggling my bottom and my sweatshirt wrapped around me is a suffocating feeling as it is. As I smell the charming scent of Saul’s cologne and the aura of popcorn I can’t help but feel in the right place. Saul’s shoulder is where I belong for now.

I can’t help but put my feet up on the seat with me and rest my head into Saul’s shoulder. Sniffing lightly, so I can sneak a few scents of Saul’s forest fresh scent. It’s intoxicating yet addictive. I’d go on his lap if that wouldn’t attract attention from the people behind us.

I can’t believe I hated him before. All he’s done is help me. He’s just wanted me to experience something good for me and all I have done is make it harder for him. I wonder if its what he’s always wanted. Do some guys dream of girls they can take care of like this? I bet not, because those girls are so messed up they can’t give anything back. I don’t know what Saul’s doing with someone like me.

Maybe its like Snow White and the Huntsmen. Did Saul mean to hurt me in the beginning but then turned the tables to protect me?

He warmed my back with his hand as the movie progressed. I felt his hand slowly make its way to a part of my diaper that was sticking out of my pants. Saul didn’t cover it, he just played with it until the end of the movie. It tickled but I kept in my squealing for once. I was too cozy and didn’t want to get up when the end credits finally came on.

Saul got up and stared down at me. He smiled, “So now I have to carry you out of here too?” I began getting up with what was left over of my Icee in hand. Then I couldn’t feel the ground anymore and found myself being on Saul’s hip. I nuzzled my head into his neck. Saul just chuckled as he threw the popcorn away with me in his arms.

I wonder if he works out and is used to carrying one hundred twenty five pounds around. Sure seems like he does it daily. Or maybe I’m just his new exercise routine. It amazes me how he’s not scared to be like this in public. It makes me wonder if he likes that weird type of attention.

Saul sets me down before we pass the bathrooms. “I’m going to the restroom real quick, I’ll be right back.” He lighly tickles my chin and leaves.

Sometimes, I wish I didn’t act on impulse. I got the best idea right as he turned around. What if I used the bathroom and got out right before Saul came out? I look in the boys bathroom and see a line, and then I check out the girls and see nothing. I watch Saul turn the corner into the bathroom and I’m gone in a heartbeat.

I really don’t want to wet my diaper again. It gets cold and soggy and then Saul has the right to mock me. I mean, they’re comfy, but if I had the choice to use the bathroom opposed to wetting my diaper. Hell yeah, I’m running to the bathroom.

I realize theres one person I have to wait behind so I stand there impatiently almost doing a potty dance. If Saul catches me, I’m dead meat, and I could easily go back now. Then again, the need to go pee is so strong and my bladder could burst any second. I don’t think the diaper I have on could hold all of what I just consumed. I wonder if this is a diaper or if I just keep calling it that and in actuality its just a pullup or something. Man, that would suck if it leaked.

The doors open to two of the stalls and I run in the one the other lady hasn’t taken. I’m so anxious my hands are trembling. I unbutton my pants and pull them down. Then I untaped the diaper, dropping it down, and falling onto the toilet at the same time.

I hate that one time, usually in the morning; you have one of those extremely long pees. I don’t mean to be gross, but it happens. So I’m sitting there, for about four minutes peeing since I just drank a full large Icee all by myself. My nerves are multiplying by the seconds.

I know guys are faster with getting their bathroom business done since they don’t have to worry about there butt touching germs and even period problems. But that line was long, so I don’t think he’ll be out before me. Then again, I’m peeing for a longer time than usual.

I’m just sitting here, in fear of someone catching me going pee? Why am I so scared of that? I’m old enough too. It’s not like I should get a punishment for going pee at 16 years old. I see no wrong to that. Saul does though. If Saul found out, I don’t even want to know what would happen. He couldn’t be that mad about it, right? I’ll just tell him I thought my diaper would leak. He’ll understand. Right?

I’m done and messily putting the tapes of the diaper back in place. Unfortunately, my retaping job is nowhere as great as Saul’s masterful diaper tape skills are. But it doesn’t matter now, I just need to get out in time. I try buttoning back up my jeans over the diaper and it seems to be more of a problem than the first time. I suck in my stomach and stretch. A little tug, and I have my pants buttoned up and zippered. Now just to wash my hands… No forget it, too much time. That’s a better excuse than the one before though. I could just say I needed to wash my hands because there was sticky stuff on them.

I decide to wash my hands for proof. Then I wipe them on my jeans and walk out of the bathroom looking around for Saul. I stand where he left me. I don’t see him anywhere, and a sigh of relief leaves my mouth. Then I feel a gentle tap on my shoulder and look behind me in horror.

“So where’d you go, little missy?” His voice husky with irritation and eyes burning.

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

These last couple of chapters are really good!!! Thank you for continuing the story!!! Can’t wait for the next chapter!

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

i agree

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

Small chapter, I know. One small chapter will sacrifice so much for the next chapter. Meaning that next chapter will be extremely long. Enjoy :slight_smile:

Chapter 11

“Uh.” Is the only word I manage to get out before I find myself butt naked staring at the floor tiles of the family restroom getting spanked ruthlessly. I kept trying to keep my hoarse cry down but it was awfully hard when I’ve never endured this much pain before. It stung more and more with each slap connecting with my bottom.

It felt as if an hour went by and when I finally got up to see the clock. In actuality it was only fifteen minutes. I instinctively brought my hand to my bottom from it stinging so badly. I fixed my eyes on one white tile below me.

Saul asked calmly, “So… Do you have anything to say for yourself, missy?” His hand slivered around my waist.

My voice cracked from the crying, “I-I’m sor-rry.” I sneak a quick glance at him and he’s calm, with a hint of forgiveness. I get a hug and then the diapers back on along with my pants.

My sniffles on the way out attract a few stares in my direction, but not much. We finally get to his car and its getting dark out. I’m relieved that the spanking is over and now I can go home and cuddle in Saul’s fuzzy blankets.

I can’t help but not feel my butt when I sit down. It’s awfully numb and I can still feel some after stings.

I feel mad at Saul. I feel even more infuriated with myself. Why did I have to be so stupid and ruin a good night? This was the first time I’ve had a perfect moment and now I just plainly killed it. Why is there never just a positive for once? Why is it always turned to a negative?

I’m depressed and just want to go in a corner like a loner. I’m good at that, in fact I’d probably master in a degree for that… Only if there was a degree in that. Man, I fucked up. Again. This just sucks. Like really badly.

Saul looks over to me and squeezes my leg, “Hungry? Where do you want to eat?” I look at him warily then look down again.

He’s sighs, “Applebee’s sound good?” He turns into the parking lot. I am hungry, but I don’t want to be out anymore, I just want to go home and sleep.

Its about a late dinner now around eight so there’s no waiting list. We get seated and I just ask for some ice tea. My throat is killer dry from all the crying I’ve done. On top of that I probably look like crap.

Saul’s sitting across from me, just watching me play with my napkin. “So what are you going to be for Halloween?”

The question caught me off guard and I stiffen up a little. Why would he be asking that? I’m not going Trick-or-Treating and I think I’m at the age its almost frowned apon. Don’t tell me he’s going to make me go with him… And what would be in store for me as a costume? I think the cliché baby costume isn’t that creative on his part.

He’s just staring at me, waiting for my answer. I think five minutes have went by, and I find that the waitress is talking to me. I guess I just spaced out that bad. Saul just orders for me for my lack of communication skills. I guess now I’m going to eat mini burger sliders.
Saul sighs, “Well, do you want to be a… princess? More like fairy tales though. Like maybe Cinderella… Or better yet Snow White?”

He’s really selling this, because he finally catches my attention about Snow White. I’d be fine with being her for Halloween. I guess I’d go door-to-door wearing a costume like that. I think it’d be cool to go out like that for once.

“Snow White?” I say a bit too quiet than I thought it’d come out. My mood lightens up a little as confidence builds every word.

Saul chuckles lightly, “So you like that idea? Of course it has to be Daddy approved but… We’ll get to those details later.” He gives me a warm smile, as I get the hint he dropped into there. It can’t be that bad, at least my diapers covered.

I then get this great idea to throw it back in his face, “So what are you going to be for Halloween?” I said a bit too cheery that came out really childish. It almost seemed as if I asked him what his favorite color was.

Saul chuckled, grazing his chin stubble with his hand, “Hmm. Good question. Maybe a huntsmen. Maybe something with guy in a mask and a cape from your nightmares.” His eyes flash with menacing flecks, “Who knows yet.” He gives me a sly smirk.

What is he trying to say exactly though? That he’s going to be Salve for Halloween? I hope he’s going as my huntsmen, or else Snow White might have an accident. Wait, no Snow White will be all padded up. Never mind.

Our food finally came and I didn’t realize how hungry I was. I ate two out of the four mini burgers and had half of my fries and was too full. I was actually proud of how much I ate for once.

Saul smiled, taking his napkin, wetting it with his mouth then reaching across the table to wipe ketchup on my cheek that I forgot to wipe off myself. I just blushed at how messy I was.

Saul grinned and studied me like he was in deep thought. I couldn’t help but look down at my lap just remembering what happened today. The morning felt like it was three days ago. All the crying I’ve done and all the things I’ve been thinking that are new to me.

Constant words weaving webs in my brain slowly connecting into questions I must think deeply to answer. Am I really beginning to like Saul? Would we ever even be considered a couple? How would a relationship with him even work? Am I really beginning to like my diapers? Why would I even think of liking them? Or him?

Most importantly… What’s going to happen on the night of Halloween? Who is Saul really? Is he my huntsmen? Or is he my Salve? Either way, he’s not mine. I’m his.

My breathing becomes raspy and my hands are trembling. I’m paralyzed with fear of the man sitting infront of me. I can’t even begin to move as he touches me to get up. I can’t. He sees this and picks me up.

I nestle my eyes deeply into his chest while my bladder releases into my diaper. Saul stiffens slightly, realizing what I’m doing. I hear a light chuckle.

With my confidence losing everything it had built up once before, I find myself utterly dependent on someone who’s broken me.

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

This story just keeps getting better!!! Can’t wait for the next part!!! Thanks for a wonderful story!!!

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

Gosh. I’m sorry guys. I have been so busy and I honestly have been working on this chapter for the longest time. Don’t give up on the story. I promise to begin working on the story more frequently in the future.

Chapter 12

Four days until Halloween and I still haven’t seen my costume. I don’t even want to ask Saul about it since he’s been quiet lately.

Saul will just start up a small conversation with me and we’ll talk as if we were two normal teens, talking about a teacher in social studies or making fun of each other’s ways we’ll eat. It’s a new side of him I’ve seen, which scares me.

He has three different sides of him now, which makes it even more confusing. The gentle side. The funny side. The sadistic side. I’m afraid of which one he’s going to become every day. If he’s being playful, I get to act like a big girl. If he’s being overly protective, I’m better off acting like a baby. The sadistic side is very deceiving. I don’t know when it’ll come on, but I’m scared. The last time he was being Salve-like was the first day of October.

When that side comes back, I don’t know how to act. I don’t know what Saul wants me to do. Act like a baby? Or play along? I don’t get why he brings that side out at all, and maybe its gone for good. We’ve been a good pair lately anyway. We’ll have a nice conversation and then we’ll hang out later.

We aren’t dating though. I mean, I don’t know how to explain it. Butterflies will tickle my tummy and I can’t keep them away. We’ve never kissed or anything, just cuddling and light caresses. If Saul’s feeling extra caring I’ll get a back rub since he says my back is too tense at times.

My backs been in pain from me stressing over when Salves coming back. Sometimes I’ll see some flicker of a thought and a twisted smile will creep on his face. Then it’ll go away and he’ll get playful with me. He’ll tickle me or pick me up and swing me around.

The fear is rising though. Since the past week I’ve had my own time to think and it’s just built tons of more tension. It’s like the anxiety is slowly burning in me and fire is rising. It feels as if I’m waiting for something. As if I’m going to snap and do something really bad. I feel the pressure. I feel it when I see Saul’s eyes flare with some sort of suspicion. Like he knows my patience is getting ready to break.

“Whatcha staring at?” I jump as something creeps around my waist. Just Saul, nothing too scary, right?
"N-othum."God my anxiety just spiked, “N-Nothing.”

He smiles crookedly as he cocks his head In curiousity with his eyes glowing lightheartedly. I look down and see his hand finding its designated curve to rest on at my hip. I can’t help but feel the butterflies caress my tummy. My usual reaction accidentally happens and my head falls into Saul. My cheek softly nudges against his chest and then I remember where I am. My body tenses up so I blush and break away from Saul’s caressing hands.

I look down at my feet and move forward in the lunch line. Saul’s body went stone cold. He silently edged forward in line behind me. I didn’t want to look up because my anxiety shot up again.

I couldn’t help but fix my shirt and make sure the edge wasn’t wrinkled up. My grey tank top under needed to be pulled up a little and flattened out. I looked at my fingers afterwards and began peeling the hang nails. Even the parts that weren’t hang nails I picked until I could pull a piece of dead skin of around my nail. Gross, I know. But this is my bad anxiety kicking in. Its either that or I bite my lips.

A sliver of pain runs through my thumb as blood traces the sides of my nail. A sigh comes from behind me and I look up. His eyes are weary and he shakes his head. His eyes glancing from my nail to my face. He takes a tray and hands it to me.

I sat in 7th hour biting layers and layers off my lips. I never thought of myself as wanting pain or dark like that, but when I get bored or anxious I take it out on my lips and fingers. I can’t help but feel Saul’s eyes trained on my tender lips.

Its weird to think that my lips once touched his and we haven’t kissed since. Its been around two months and it makes me wonder if I’m bad at kissing. Is that the reason he wont kiss me? He gives me all of the things a couple does at school, besides kissing. He’ll hold my hand and even put his arms around me. His friends think were dating.

A sweet breathe tickles my ears in a whisper, “Heather, stop biting your lip. Unless you want to be a baby later. I was going to let you be a big girl until Halloween, but…” I get the message as he sighs. I stop biting my lip, its hard to not the whole class as it becomes real that Halloweens in four days. At least I’m good I won’t be a baby until Friday.

I leave the school and drive home hastily finding Saul’s not following me for once. It’s been so cold lately and I’ve been finding my wardrobe isn’t up to date for fall. Maybe going to the mall for a few clothes wouldn’t be a bad idea. I haven’t gone shopping for clothes in almost a year.
An hour later I’m shopping alone trying on clothes. The clothes I picked out are different then my usual band t-shirts and skinny jeans. I bought a pair of black leggings, hugging black sweat pants at the last store. I usually never was interested in clothes that complimented my small curves.

I looked at the outfit I had on and really liked how comfy but cute it was. The light long-sleeved pink V-neck pleasantly layed over my grey lace top. The pants I had on were light blue and hugged my hips but had some extra room just in case of a diaper underneath. The pants weren’t skinny, they were just boot cut. I honestly liked it. It didn’t look, well, boyish for once. It was girly and kind of flirty.

I got a few long-sleeves, sweat pants, pajamas, tank tops, t-shirts, and a new bra or two. I didn’t realize how much I needed new clothes until today.

I was on my way out with my bags and then saw a name that caught my eye. I slowly walked towards Victoria Secrets remembering my need for actual panties and not the kids ones.

I felt awkward walking in alone. I blushed as the pretty sales girl welcomed me into the store and asked if I needing any help. I just walked away silently and saw there was a sale on panties. I got a few pairs and hoped that Saul couldn’t treat me like a baby if I wore those.

As I drive home I can’t help but think of the clothes I got. I like them a lot and they all are cute, but I feel like I’m changing into someone I feel more at home with. This side I never wanted to indulge in because of my nightmares. I feel in a way my new wardrobe is partly influenced by Saul too.

The fall weather lightens my mood as I cuddle up in my fuzzy blankets. I basically hide under them as my mind trails off into a snuggly world. Only to be awaken by my annoying alarm clock.

I put on some top eyeliner and a little mascara. Then I curl my hair and pin my fringe to the side. I put on my new sweat pants and cuddle on a new light grey swoop neck sweater. I take a granola bar with me on the way out and stop to look at myself in the mirror. I find myself looking very adorable for once. I have curves that show for once but not in a slutty way at all.

I make it to school pretty early and am actually hoping for once that I can see Saul in the morning. I’m in a good mood surprisingly for a morning. I make my way to my locker and get my first hour book. I gaze into my locker waiting for Saul to show up. I rather stare into my locker awkwardly than stand there like a loner.

I feel someone hug me from behind and take in my light lily scent. I feel him sigh and nestle his nose into my hair.

I close my locker and turn around. Saul sees my new clothes and I see a delighted glimmer in his eyes.

He lightly caresses my sides, “Wow…” He glances up and down, “You’re absolutely the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen.” Saul says in a gentle but steady voice. He glows with some sort of content as if he’s trying to take in the moment.

Sauls hand rises to my cheek. He caresses it with his thumb. His lips meet my forehead and I close my eyes. The sweet scent of his cologne travels to under my nose just as his lips fall on my own. His hands lightly trace the small of my back and instinctively move to where the edge of my diaper should be. The kiss is so gentle and as he pulls away his eyes slowly open to reveal a pleasant glimmer under his long lashes and my heart skips a few beats.

Even though it was just a two second peck of a kiss my tummy tickles with hundreds of butterflies. I can’t help but giggle and kiss his cheek and hide into his chest. He chuckles lightly seeming as good of a mood as I am in.

I hear someone cough behind us. I look and see we were in front of someone who needed to get to their locker. We walk around the school for until five minutes before the bell then we had to split up. I didn’t get another kiss but I did get a cuddling hug.

I couldn’t help but blush thinking about Saul the rest of the day. I dreamed of him all day and by 7th hour I was happy to be sitting by him for once.

“So are we hanging out after school?” I blushed afterwards feeling like a stupid little geek fan girl.

Saul smiled warmly, “I would love to,” He warmed my thigh with his hand, “But unfortunately, I have to get a haircut and get some things done today. But, how about tomorrow we hang out? Hmm?”

I give back a little nod and a light giggle. I don’t know where the giggle came from, but it sure made me blush. I really need to hold back my urge to nuzzle my head into Saul. Saul will probably get bored with me soon if I keep up this stupid girly side.

I make it to the next day, which happens to be Thursday.

Just to think Halloween is tomorrow. I don’t even have the costume. I wonder if I was supposed to get a costume myself. I honestly don’t know. I just am excited to go to Saul’s later today.

As I stroll to my locker, early to school once again, I see Saul staring at a wall. He looks like he’s in deep thought. I mean, he usually is in deep thought but never staring at walls like a weirdo. Maybe he’s just tired.

As I come closer he shifts to beside my locker and watches me with some sly grin on him. I wonder if I can get a kiss from his soft lips today…

I lean on my locker and look at him, almost begging for a kiss. I shift my weight and just stand there in silence, studying his eyes, as he studies mine. His face goes dark and he looks at me questionably.

I flush and open my locker, realizing how stupid I am. What was I thinking? I didn’t put any makeup on and I look ugly as fuck. Why would he even attempt to kiss that? I’m such an idiot. Now he’s mad at me, and I’m scared to look at him.

“Well I’m going to class early. I’m leaving 2nd hour for a dentist appointment and I’m not coming back since I have a few things to do. But I’ll pick you up after school. Okay?” He said sharply, like he didn’t want anything to do with my fugly self.

Saul stormed away without seeing me even nod. My vision blurred and I felt so incredibly stupid. I don’t know why Saul would even like someone like me. Someone who can’t do something right nor walk straight half the time.

I went straight to the bathroom and tried to calm myself. It didn’t work well considering the whole day I was a mess. I made it to 7th hour and then out the door to home.

I made it home to find Saul waiting for me. I parked my car in the garage and got into Saul’s car without bothering to go inside my house to drop off my backpack.

I was trembling the whole ride to his house. The silence scared me and I couldn’t help but shift my eyes to him. He looked calm but with a thoughtful look. I sighed when I found he wasn’t mad or like earlier.

We walked inside and I slipped off my shoes. I couldn’t help looking at my feet. I could feel Saul’s piercing eyes critiquing my every move. He took my hand with a sigh and pulled me to his room.

As we got in, I saw a white skirt, a lace scoop top and a few other pieces of clothing. The lace scoop top was from my house. I guess I didn’t see him take it when we hung out once. There was also a light blue corduroy half vest. Among those items were also a cartoon like red bow, a dark leather small hip belt belt, and some frilly socks that would only reach up to my ankle.

Saul began unbuttoning my jeans as I glazed over the clothes. I almost forgot about the Halloween costume. I was surprised he got all the clothes individually. Even though, now I see he got most of them from me.

I felt a tap on my ankle and looked down to Saul expectantly waiting for me to raise my foot. I whimpered and brought it up. He chuckled shaking his head as he removed my pants. Then he stood up and scrutinized my underwear. He shook his head disapprovingly. I looked down, self-conscious about my choice, to find that I was wearing my black cotton panties lined with white ribbon.

Saul said, “I was hoping you were wearing your adorable undies again, but now you actually need a diaper. Daddy does not approve of these. Sorry sweetie. But I’m warning you now, I will throw away any woman like panties you decide to wear.” He gives me a stern look before leaving to get the diaper supplies.

I shift my weight on my feet, wondering why he even cares. I thought guys liked girls wearing sexy-ish stuff or at least womanly things that separated the girl from the ladies. I always try stuff to make Saul happy, and it constantly fails.

I whisper under my breathe as my confidence and happiness falls, “I give up.”

Then I let my internal frustrations get the best of me and huff. I plop onto Sauls bed face first and just lay there hiding my head into his pillow. As I lay there and a stinging sensation spreads on my butt as I roll over to see Saul glaring at me. He sets his items down and cuts off my underwear with scissors. Then he throws them in his trashcan.

Saul shakes his head and unfolds a diaper. I lay there feeling the air attack my naked parts and my good friend humiliation spreads onto my face. Saul smiles at the diaper he has in his hands and shifts his focus back to me. He smacks the side of my thigh so I can raise my legs and butt for him. The diaper slips naturally under me. He takes out the powder and generously applies it to my diaper area. Then I feel the comfy cotton hug around my front and look to see Saul’s eyes glimmering as he tapes it.

His eyes travel to my face as a light smile spreads across his. My eyes reflect my own puzzled mind. I don’t understand this man. Why does he get this glazed over face every time it comes to me being in infant/ little girl clothes? My whole life I’ve only met guys who were into the sexy, hot or beautiful girls. The guys who want something in return like the nasty stuff as in sex for a backrub. Saul just wants to baby me and even though I don’t like it at first, yet I end up enjoying the scents and the little moments of happiness later. I don’t get any of it though but I’ve had this treatment for a month or two now.

“Here, sit up for a moment, little bunny.” I blush at his random name and sit up. I hope he doesn’t stick to that.

Saul brings my shirt over my head and trades it with my lace top. I raise my arms as he fits it over. Then he takes the white ruffle skirt and pulls it over my head like my shirt. I giggle at his silly dressing techniques. He fixes my shirt so its all tucked under my skirt. Saul takes the half sized corduroy vest and slips it on.

After he buttons it he sighs. “I don’t know if we really need the belt. I think it’s a little too much but it may make the costume. Let’s see, stand up, bunny.” My stomach tingles as he says that and I almost pee into my diaper.

I look shyly up to him and his eyes soften. He situates the costume some more. I realize that the skirt is weird. He brought it a bit higher on my waist and the diaper makes it poofier. My hand traces down to the edge of the skirt on the back and the bottom of my diaper feels like it’s almost showing. Oh my. I see his master plans now. I look down to the bed. I see a red pacifier with a string and realize I might be going out like this for Halloween.

I got when he said I’d be his baby Snow White, but when he said that, I was thinking of the not-so-revealing version. I had a feeling I’d be wearing a diaper, but I didn’t expect it to show. Nor did I think I’d be wearing a pacifier.

Saul followed my gaze to the pacifier on the bed, “Oh! I almost forgot. Have to do the whole thing to make sure it looks right.” He fastens the red clip and string of the pacifier to my vest and plops the pacifier in my open mouth. Then he takes the belt and brings it around my hip to where it hangs loosley. He takes the red bow and clips it where my fringe is twisted to the side. Next the frilly white socks get pulled onto my feet and brought up to my ankles.

He situates my clothes one last time. Then he backs up and smiles. His eyes twinkle with delight and I begin to feel a warmth spread in two places: my cheeks and my diaper. Oh no, I can’t meet his gaze anymore as I wet myself thoroughly. I just want to curl up and nap now. This is the thing that I wish didn’t happen. It just gives Saul another reason for me to keep wearing diapers, especially for Halloween.

I place my hand on my cheek and realize I’m actually nursing my pacifier. I don’t think I’ve ever even had a rhythm going considering I never used a pacifier until now. As much as I hate the idea, it isn’t too bad of an item. I just wish I had my fuzzy sweater so I wasn’t as cold.

Saul takes me out of my trance as I feel his finger poke into my diaper. How did he know already? It one thing for him to check a diaper when I peed in it a while ago, but it’s a whole other thing when Saul checks my diaper while I’m soaking it. That’s what sent me into a complete infant state.

Saul chuckled lightly under his breathe and began changing me back into the clothes I was wearing before. I met his gaze somewhere in my state of embarrassment and he began cooing me. Saul was telling me to calm down. I wasn’t crying but I guess I must have looked like I was about too. I fell into him and nuzzled my head into his chest tugging slightly on his sleeve.

Saul sighed with a light chuckle while shaking his head, “Oh my, what am I going to do with you, baby girl? I had plans for tomorrow, but I doubt they’re going to happen when you start doing things like this.” He took my chin with his finger and tilted my head so I could look at him.

A trace of one of his signature crooked smiles was forming, “I know you keep thinking you don’t need me, but the reality is that you do…” He took my sweatshirt and slipped it over my arms then began buttoning it, “Hmmm. You’re such a silly little thing, you know that, don’t you?” I looked up into his eyes and was happy to be warm in my sweater again. He knew I was cold but didn’t put my pants back on. I looked on the bed and then glanced back at him.

Saul chuckled some more, “You’re not getting pants now if that’s what you want. Maybe if you wore your toddler undies I would’ve let you.” He shook his head, “Come here baby.” He picked me up and placed me on his hip.

Saul’s face was embellished with a glow I never can describe. It’s the mix of a good mood reflecting externally and altogether happiness.

His eyes were trained on me as he walked down to the kitchen. I almost forgot I was wearing a pacifier at this point. Also, I couldn’t help but notice that he didn’t change my diaper yet. I shifted a bit on his hip and rested my head on his chest.

I could hear the sigh of his good mood. I was honestly too sleepy to move my head to see what he was doing. He set my bottom on the counter and looked at me with his eyes twinkling. My mind shifted from his twinkling eyes to the microwave and the sound of popping. The smell of buttery popcorn rushed into my nose and I felt a weak smile fall onto my lips. I looked back at Saul and he was still watching me with a small grin placed on his face. He seemed to like watching me. I don’t know why he would, but he does.

A light kiss met my forehead. I couldn’t help but squirm as Saul traced the edge of the back of my diaper. As I squirmed, the wet front of my diaper squished into me and I involuntarily made a whimpering noise. Saul could tell I was beginning to get grumpy.

I really don’t like a wet diaper. I’m fine with it for the first few minutes of warmth, but after that I tend to get a bit grumpy when Saul doesn’t change it. Saul at least changes it when he has time. I think the longest I’ve been in a wet diaper is an hour. It’s not that long because Saul gets that I can get pretty grumpy and I don’t like it. Also, I’ve found that he likes changing me or at least I think he does.

I watched as Saul emptied the popcorn into a bowl and got out some mugs. I was dazed as I watched him put milk and hot chocolate packets into the mugs. He placed them into the microwave and his attention turned back to me. I looked down grumpily at my diaper then looked up at him.

Saul shook his head and smiled, “Okay, baby girl. Let’s get you changed. Miss Grumpy Head.” I huffed as he took me back upstairs.
Ten minutes later I found myself sitting cross-legged on Saul’s lap while eating popcorn and sipping hot chocolate. Mmm. It was good. Who knew it was the best combination to have on a cold, long day? Saul smiled as he tickled my tummy.

“Do you like this?” Saul asked as he looked down at my diaper.

“Huh?” I was too far into my own little world to understand what he meant by ‘this’.

Saul met my gaze, “Do you like being babied by me?”

I missed my mouth as I tried to sip my hot chocolate. It ran down my chin and onto my grey sweater. Saul set my mug aside and stopped the dripping with a few tissues.

He had a crooked grin but a concerned look as he dabbed my chin and sweatshirt. I sat there perplexed.

Do I like being babied? I never really thought of it. I hated it once upon a time, but now look at me. I’m bouncing around on Saul’s lap glazed over with a silly expression. I could feel my eyebrows knit together in thought as I played with the fuzzies on my sweater.

I did like it, but everything I ever began to like has slipped away from me. Was I some type of freak for liking being babied? I mean, I am beginning to like being diapered. They are so soft and warm. There is more meaning to them then the exterior and interior designs. The diapers itself are some type of new comfort. They are almost a security. Not just them, but Saul is also my new sense of security.

Saul. My stomach tingles a bit. I blush and cup my hand to my cheek as I shake my head trying to ignore my little stupid teen hormones. I look under my eyelashes to sneak a glance at him. His eyes are studying me and I can tell he already knows. He just wants to hear it.

I mumble, “Erm… Um. Maybeeh. I dunno.” My face reddens a shade darker. The corner of his lip twitches up.

“What was that? I didn’t catch what you said. Maybe talk a bit louder than a whisper?” He was just teasing me now.

“Maybeeeee. I dunno…” I giggled a bit and looked back up at him.

“How do you not know? Hmmm.” He was interrogating now. He pulled me up against him to where he could feel my breath under his chin.

Saul held my gaze as he looked down at me. He tickled under my chin.

“I jus dunno.” He laughed and had to break away from the cute moment we were having.

He had to compose his face by looking at the ceiling and then turned his attention back on me, “Hmm. Is that it, huh? What do you like about it? Tell Daddy.”

I felt a surge of anxiety pulse through me. What could I tell him that he didn’t already know? My mind drew up blanks. Maybe he just wanted to hear it come from me?

I sucked in some air and mumbled, “I guess… I like the diapers and stuff.” I looked down at the buttons on my sweatshirt, “And I-uh,” Then all the thoughts tumbled into my mind. All the things I didn’t understand on why I was weirdly so attached to being babied finally clicked.

I could feel Saul’s mood shift from teasing to serious. He shifted to sit up a bit more as he could see my eyes getting watery.

My eyes went searching, searching for something interesting to look at. They eventually fell on Saul and my emotions softened, “I like feeling cared for. Feeling like I have someone there for me. Someone who I can depend on for once. Someone I can trust. Its nice, I guess.” I nuzzled my head into Saul.

His voice was rough and it made me look at him. His eyes got all watery. Saul coughed and smiled, “That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard from you.”

I knew at that moment that Salve was gone for good. Salve was only the playful and teasing side of Saul. He was not a part of my nightmares anymore. I could trust him, and trust was not a easy thing to come by. My whole life was based on depression, anxiety, and nervous breakdowns. When I’m with Saul, all the layers I’ve ever built up vanish and I am nothing but his.
His face glows and his eyes burn with something I can’t even begin to understand.

Saul murmurs hoarsely, “Heather, I love you.”

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

I am so glad you continued with this story! I kept checking back to see if any more had been posted! I loved this last chapter, I can’t wait to see what happens and see if Salve really is gone or if he will come back!

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

is there going to be more?

Re: Nightmare Part 3: Tender Whimpers

Gosh. I feel bad, but I can’t continue it. The writing and setting are just so horrible I just can’t continue. I’d have to rewrite the full story if I started again on it. I’m sorry, but I don’t think so. :’(