Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Robyn’s Life
Chapter One

The night air was cool as I pulled the warm blankets further up to my chin and curled my feet to keep them warm in the blankets. The darkness of the room seemed to make me feel that it was still hours before time to get up, and I really didn’t want to wake up at the moment. I couldn’t remember what I had been dreaming about, but whatever it was, I felt very content to stay where I was.

There was a smell that I couldn’t identify in the air. Just what it was, was impossible to trace. It didn’t smell bad or anything, it was just… curious. Tried as I might, I couldn’t get the overpowering aroma from penetrating my brain enough to cause my eyes to flutter open. I was lying on my stomach at the moment, my brain thinking back to yesterday afternoon.

You see, I’m a high school senior, and though I really liked this girl at my school, I had completely chickened out on asking her to the prom. I just wasn’t good at asking girls out at all. Matter of fact, I’ve never asked a girl for any kind of outing at all because I was just that shy, and for the most part, girls seemed to like guys that are sure of themselves, even jerks, over guys like me, so you can guess how many times I’ve been on a date at all. Never.

Well, the smell had caused me enough intrigue that I opened my eyes for the first time since feeling the pull of the morning, but as I looked around in the dark, I noted that several things were out of place. First, upon turning to my back and looking back over at the other side of my bed, I could see that my nightstand and my digital red flash displaying lit alarm clock was missing. In place of it, the room seemed expanded, and I could see a large dresser against one wall with a round mirror facing me, or at least that was what it looked like. I could really only see silhouettes at the moment because of how dark the room was.

“Curious.”

I looked to the foot of the bed, and saw a small desk with a chair. Somewhere between the dresser and the desk, there was also a card table, or at least a small square table about that size with three chairs around it.

Now, I realized what this was…, or at least it feels like that, when you dream you wake up, but you are not really awake, and so you try to wake up again and again, until you finally succeed just as you get scared that it is impossible to wake up. That is what I must be experiencing, or that was what I told myself.

I closed my eyes, and waited a few minutes, and then tried to open them again, expecting the room to have changed slightly, just enough to make me feel like I might be awake this time, but in reality, nothing had changed at all. Everything was exactly as I had seen it a moment ago, even the pile of clothes lying next to the bed.

“What the dog?” I called out.

Never in these dreams had I remembered hearing myself call out, nor had I ever remembered having a voice that sounded a bit higher pitched and almost… girl-like! I clasped my hands over my mouth, probably with my eyes widening to as large as silver dollars in the dark. Something was definitely different about this dream!

I tried to close my eyes again. I would try to force myself back to sleep, and then wake up. But I didn’t feel tired at all. My eyes seemed to hurt from being forced to stay closed, and curiosity kept trying to make me peek. I gave up and sat up, still in the same bed that was different from my own in the different room.

Looking closer, I could see that the bedspread had little flowers on it, and that it was pink. I sighed and waited for what was next to come in this strange dream that felt less and less scary, but much more mysterious. Why was I dreaming that I was a girl?

The realization had not hit me until I had actually thought it. Yes, I was dreaming I was a girl. I felt something more to my chest than just the normal barrow muscles and flat nipples. No, the chest was definitely with shape, small round hills or the like were pushing through the skin, and as I put my hand over my chest, I found it bare, and that with the nipples now standing nearly erect, it was much more like little mountains with a valley that fell between them, the space between them was very narrow, and the valley felt quite deep.

“What the hell?” I nearly yelled the same girlish voice firing through my ears from earlier. “What am I doing here?”

“Robyn? Is that you? Are you awake?” came a sound from outside the door just before it opened. I sat up looking the direction of the door, the blankets having fallen from my chest just as it opened. Thank goodness it was just another girl, but what the… I’m not even sure I liked that. Dream or not, this was not comfortable.

“I’m awake,” I said hoping she would close the door sooner than later.

“So you are. You are going to high school today, so you should go get your new clothes we got you for school.”

“What?” I asked my mind racing. “What do you mean I’m going to high school today?”

“Well, it’s the first day of school, and you start high school today. Did you forget?”

I nodded not knowing what else to say. I was starting high school? that meant that in my dream, I was at least 2 maybe three years younger than my real age. I sighed and waited for the woman that I still didn’t recognize to shut the door, then I climbed out of bed seeing that I was in a pair of pink and grey striped panties with little pony designs running along the gray stripes.

I was glad that the woman had not stayed, and the door was now closed as I wondered to the dresser with the small round mirror in it reflecting my room. Or was it?

I looked through the mirror, and I thought I saw, not the reflection of this room, but the reflection of the room in my original home. Despite that, I could not find myself anywhere, and what looked back at me through the mirror was definitely a girl with somewhat decent ‘cupcakes’ as I started to call them out of respect for not wanting to offend anyone else, and out of embarrassment of calling them the many proper things they might ought to be called. They were not so small that they were unnoticeable, but rather, they were seeming to be calling attention to them which really spooked me. I knew I couldn’t hide them at school, and somehow, I feared going to school as a girl. I just… it was not something I was familiar with at all.

My long strawberry blond, almost red in places, hung down to my shoulders, and my green eyes stared back through the mirror. Well, these were mine, while I was Robyn, but my real body should have had nearly black-brown hair, blue or green eyes depending on the shirt I wore, and definitely male chests and male boxers on my pelvis.

I shook my head and opened the dresser top drawer to find some undershirts, all girls, some bras, of which I had no experience in wearing, removing, or even helping with as a guy who had never had a girlfriend in all my high school days. I shook as I held this fragile strap out with two sewn-in baskets of some type. Was this what a bra really looked like? My mother had never even made me do the laundry because she always feared I’d find out too early what bras looked like or worse.

I turned it over and over in my hands trying to figure out how I was supposed to put it on. Naturally, I wanted to put it on like a regular shirt, you know, pull the straps across the front of my chest, but logic told me that that was definitely wrong. How did girls get something like this on? I couldn’t even see what I was doing!

I tried to put on an undershirt and played with the idea of skipping the bra, but when I tried that, something intimidating told me that if I did that, it would be worse than showing off my panties at school. No, I had to try to put it on. I removed the undershirt and pulled the bra over my over pronounced ‘cupcakes,’ and reached in back, but still could not really get the straps to connect. I gave up and peeked out the bedroom door.

My face blushing bright red, I was sure of it because it certainly felt on fire, I called down the steps to the woman, calling ‘mom,’ hoping that was the right word.

The woman came in and saw that I was completely undressed and shook her head at me.

“Robyn, you’re going to be late,” she said. “What’s wrong with you this morning.”

“I guess I’m so nervous,” I invented, “that I can’t get my bra on right.”

The woman looked at the ceiling as if thinking ‘oh brother,’ but she came over, and reached behind me to pull the bra straps together. Then she pointed at my chest.

“Adjust yourself, honey,” she said, but I could only stare at her blankly.

Sighing, she showed me how to pull my breasts into the cups of my bra. “I swear,” she said as she did so. “You are either playing around because you are scared of school, or your development issues are getting worse every year.”

“Development issues?” I mouthed wondering what she might be talking about. Is there something wrong with this girl whose place I was taking?

The woman didn’t leave to let me get dressed on my own now, though, but rather, pulled out a pink and purple striped shirt and put that over my head after pulling an undershirt on me, and then she pulled on a skirt over my ‘pony’ panties.

“There, all dressed except for socks. Need help with those too?” she asked looking at me as if to dare me to say yes.

I shook my head no.

“Good, come down to breakfast after you put your socks on,” she said.

I walked out of the room with some white socks on that came just over my ankles. I walked down the short hall-balcony with only four doors in it. My door was the third from the furthest end from the stairs. I walked down to the living room, and then saw a couple of steps up to the dining room as though the living room was a sunk in style.

In the kitchen, just beyond the dining room, were that woman again, and a man with red hair.

“Uncle Jack said he’ll take you to school this morning,” the woman said. “I would do it, but I have to go in early today.”

“What about the bus?” I asked automatically, thinking that girl or not, I wouldn’t want to be seen by my peers as someone so dependent on the adults in my life.

“We’ve already talked about the bus,” the woman said. “You can’t ride the bus until we are sure you know the way both to and from school in case of an emergency. With your condition, we have to make sure you know exactly where you are so you don’t get lost.”

Condition? I was liking my situation less and less. The way the woman seemed to be talking about me, I wondered if I was supposed to have some kind of slow learning problem or something. I was getting really tired of this dream in a hurry, and I wanted more than ever for it to end, but it just kept going on and on.

Before I knew it, we were driving to MY old high school. I wondered if anyone would recognize me, and if somehow, I would be made fun of for being dressed in this girl getup since I had been such a jerk before towards anyone that seemed gay. Maybe it was a kind of payback. I definitely was not gay, and I certainly hoped that no one would think I was. Then, I reminded myself it was a dream. No matter what people thought about me in this place, it would all be in my head. No one would really think that way in real life, and so, sighing with my shoulders falling in relief to some realization that I had an out, or I hoped I did, I walked into the ‘new school’ a little more confident.

Of course, since I knew where everything was, already, I walked right to the lunch room and ordered a cinnamon roll to eat for breakfast while I searched through my bag for a schedule. Interesting, the cinnamon roll tasted just the same as it always did, and it really did have a rich cinnamon-like taste and the frosted sugar really made my hands sticky! How could I imagine that so clearly? I really wanted to wake up, and now!

I found my schedule, and I moaned when I saw who my fourth period teacher was, Mr. Hastings for English and right after the PE class on the other side of the school. Mr. Hastings was the most anal teacher in the school, and he didn’t accept any excuses. Remembering back, I don’t remember having him for fourth period though, and I was sure that I had had PE for first period, so this was not just some memory. It was something my mind was making up as we went, and the more it went, the scarier it felt.

After eating the rather taste-filled sweet bread, I walked directly to the Algebra class, knowing the school much better than I had when I was in the tenth grade. I was actually relieved to know where I was going. If I had been in a completely foreign environment on top of all else that was going on, I’d probably have gone crazy already. Still, things were getting more and more strange as I walked through the familiar halls. The halls were the same, the classrooms were nearly the same, but something else was not the same.

As I peeked through some of the open doorways for the bathrooms on the way to the algebra class, I smelled some sickening smells of tobacco and other things that I didn’t want to know coming from them. The smells were so vivid, I was actually feeling a little sick to my stomach from them and I passed by them as quickly as possible. I was glad for the privacy wall that we had to navigate around when going into the bathrooms, because at the moment, I felt really scared of looking in the boys’ room because I was supposed to be a girl, and I felt even more nervous of looking in on the girls, knowing that all the partition doors for the stalls had been removed two years ago when someone had been caught smoking pot on school grounds. The school had done that so that no one would feel safe smoking or bringing drugs into the school ever again, and during my time at school I thought it had worked.

I got into the math class, and waited patiently while the teacher sorted out those that went to the wrong class by mistake. Sitting patiently, I noticed that more than a few girls and a couple of boys were pointing in my direction and whispering mysteriously.

Sheepishly, I closed my legs, and turned away from them fearing that they were making fun of me for some strange reason.

Before I knew it, the teacher was going through the first day of school rituals, first passing out text books to every student, recording our book numbers in their records, and then handing out the syllabus which included class expectations, rules, and what we will learn for the year. I sighed as I stared at this paper, knowing every part of it word for word. I had had this teacher before, and after reading just the first paragraph, I realized that I recalled exactly how she ran the class.

Students around me seemed to be out of their element, no one really ready for high school. I was beyond those first day jitters as far as knowing what to expect from the teachers, but I realized that I had other issues that were coming to surface in my mind. I don’t know any of these other students. What if they think I’m a nerd, or I’m lame, or that I’m gay?

“It’s only a dream,” I mumbled to myself to remind myself that none of this could be real.

“Excuse me, Ms. Barret,” the teacher called over at me. “Did you say something while I was talking?”

“No ma’am,” my high pitched girl voice surprised me again, and without thinking I covered my mouth with my hand. Other kids looked over at me, and chuckled and giggled.

“That’s enough,” Mrs. Haile called out to the class at large. “We do not laugh at other students in this room, or we will all stay after class and offer Robyn an apology.”

The other students rolled their eyes and waited for the teacher to continue going through the boring syllabus, rules, procedures, and expectations with them. Why the teachers wasted time by giving students a paper and then reading it to them rather than having them do so on their own always irritated me, but if they think we have to be directed like four year olds, maybe it was just part of the dynamics of how we treated them back. It was always students against teachers in my head.

Well, I was more than happy to see that the class ended, and the other students were far more interested in finding their next new class than tormenting me, so I walked off to find my Sociology class, this class taught by a man named Mr. Kean. I wasn’t sure about this particular teacher as I had not taken that particular class in the tenth grade. However, if he was anything like the regular teachers at the school, I could guess his policies.

When we walked into the room, the first thing I noticed was that the television was pulled to the front of the room, and the recording machine was already on. The television screen was blue, ready to play back whatever the teacher had set in there.

“Mr. Kean,” I raised my hand after taking my seat.

“Yes, Miss?” he asked not yet knowing my name.

“Are we watching a movie on the first day of classes?”

“No ma’am. That would be a waste of your time and mine. I have something else loaded in that machine, which I will direct everyone’s attention to once everyone is in the classroom.”

I nodded and waited for the classroom to fill up.

It turned out, that in this class, the first ten minutes of class would be dedicated to watching some news program he had taped previously probably at home the night before.

“I want you all to keep notes on what they talk about in the news, and to refer to those notes often while we are looking at what society is like. When we compare societies both ancient and modern, you will be able to make personal conclusions about things that change and things that stay the same.”

He then turned on the news, and I sat there writing down some of what they were talking about. I didn’t really understand what he wanted us to write, even though I was older, because I don’t think he was really that clear about what he wanted. It seemed hard to keep up with what they were saying.

Once the news moment was over, it lasting about ten minutes of the class, I was happy to move on getting the syllabus and to have him talking to us about what we would be expected to do. This news moment would be a routine procedure in every class, and now, he explained it more fully. We were to not just take notes, but to make a note to ourselves about what we felt about this information.

What was more, we were going to explore what society was like in many different environments around the world and in different social classes even within the United States. Were people even in one country so different? It seemed like he believed that was true.

I could care less what he thought about society to tell the truth, and wondered if it was impossible to change my class for American History, something that seemed far more interesting to me. Still, for the period, I was stuck, and I was more than happy when I was allowed to leave Sociology and go to the Physical Education class.

I arrived in the locker room, and waited for the girl’s teacher to come around with a lock for me. This was not new to me, and I knew already what was expected. The next day, I would bring my PE uniform to class, and I would be inspected and get graded on keeping my PE uniform clean and wearing it every day as well as participating in classes and basically just being a student. I had only put up with taking the class for one year, but I still remembered the tediousness of keeping up in that class. It was easy to keep a good grade as long as you were willing to please the teachers.

After the P.E. class, however, my first trial as a girl struck me. I was on my way to Mr. Haile’s class, the strictest, and possibly worst teacher of all time, when I realized that I should visit the bathroom. Well, even as it was, I rarely had to go badly after just one class, and I knew that with the tight schedule of dressing in P.E. class, and with that class being on one side of the building while Mr. Haile was on the other, it might be a bad idea to try to sneak in. I would be able to wait until after that class, and anyway, then, it would be lunch, so I wouldn’t be rushed to use the toilets, right?

I walked into the Mr. Haile’s class confident that I could wait through one fifty-five minute class. I didn’t really even have to go that badly as it was, so there was really nothing to worry about.

What I would have given to know at that time, how much harder it was as a girl, what I know now. Not only that, but there was another problem.

I sat third desk back from the front, and in the first row, and that put me right by the teacher’s desk. I sighed because if I had a choice, I’d be on the other side of the classroom, but there being nothing else to do but obey if I didn’t want to draw attention to myself, I just sat.

It was just a dream. I sat thinking, I could start something if I want to. Nothing bad would come from it, because this isn’t real! I would just wake up, and no one would know anything about it. Even as I thought it though, I just couldn’t get my shy ass to stand up and do anything that would get me noticed.

He was just as anal if not more so than I remembered him. He passed out our English books and he paused half way in, taking a moment to explain that even if we ‘dog ear’ the book, we would be held accountable because it damages the books. If we even wrote light lines in the books, he would know, and we would be held accountable.

“How are you going to hold us accountable?” one of the other students suddenly interrupted him.

“For one,” he said taking a breath to steady his nerves. “You have just cause your classmates to wait one minute after the bell for talking out of turn. Do it again, and the class will wait a minute and a half. I have every right to make you wait up to five minutes after class since your next period is lunch, so don’t waste my time, or I’ll waste yours. For another, it is true you might not have a job to pay for the book, so I will take it out of your grade. For example, if you do fifty dollars damage to a book, you will lose 5% of your total grade for the semester. Do you understand?”

The student nodded and became quiet. After that, no one dared to speak until they were given a chance to raise their hands, and even then, everyone was too scared to respond to the new rules that were imposed on them. I knew that was going to happen though. It had not surprised me at all, but what I wasn’t ready for, was that the pressure in my bladder started to pulsate, and I felt a little warm tingling ‘down stairs,’ that told me that I really needed to use the bathroom soon.

I looked over at the clock and noted that we still had at least twenty minutes of class left. I looked over at Mr. Haile, and knew right away that being uncomfortable for about twenty minutes was much more desirable than making this hard-ass angry. Besides, not only might he say no, but I could earn the class another thirty seconds of being late for lunch, something I didn’t want everyone hating me for.

The discomfort grew little by little, but it was no mistake that by the end of the period, my knees were bouncing off of each other, and my butt was scooting back and forth in the chair I was sitting in. There was a kind of constant squeaking noise that no one else seemed to identify though my face felt fiery enough that I wondered how they didn’t know it was me.

The teacher finally let us go, a minute after the bell just as he had promised and just as I knew he would, and I started to walk with everyone to the main hall where I could find a washroom. Then it hit me. It was only a dream, but still, I had to choose.

If I were to go in the boy’s room, would that make me a pervert since I was displaying a girl’s body? If I went into the girl’s bathroom, would that make me a pervert because I might see the other girls going pee? Which one should I use?

Even as I tried to make up my mind, I could see other students filing into each one, according to his or her own sex, and I knew I had to make a decision soon. I held my breath, and I walked into the door for boys, but when I got just on the inside of it, I met two football players who smiled down at me.

“You’re in the wrong toilets, miss,” they said.

Typical of dreams, if something can get in your way, it will. I blushed and backed out stammering out ‘sorry,’ and then got myself pushed into the girl’s room. I walked around the block of wall, and my mouth dropped.

There were literally, lines of six girls in front of each of four stalls, the lines of the girls were busy talking about their first day at school while the open stall doors of the girls inside, blushed as they exposed themselves to their classmates.

“Why the hell don’t they put doors on the stalls?” I whispered under my breath. “This is ridiculous.”

“I know, right?” a girl in front of me responded. “But hey, if we just turn our heads and talk to the girls around us, we can give each other a little privacy. I just hope I don’t have to poop while at school. That would be so humiliating, everyone knowing it is me because of the open door.”

“You are so right,” another girl spoke breaking into the conversation.

I felt my face blushing, hearing girls talk about poop and basically bathroom issues was really embarrassing. I never pictured them doing that in a hundred years! When I saw them, they always called the mildest of issues so gross!

“The other girl in front of you is done,” one girl prodded the girl in front of her, probably anxious to relieve her own needs.

I could feel the pressure in my bladder throbbing with stronger signals, and the heat in my panties was getting harder to ignore. There was almost a kind of annoying prick in my privates, that alerted me to the danger of possibly peeing my panties while I waited in line to use the toilet. All around me, I saw something I had never seen before. There were maybe two or three girls, openly dancing around as they waited for those in front of them. Was this what girls were really like when they didn’t know boys were watching, or was it my male perverted mind making these things up?

“Please, wake up,” I pleaded with myself wanting this all to be over with, but the dream just relentlessly trod onward. I was getting to the point of wanting to slap myself silly for dreaming myself into this situation, and worse, the dream seemed to slow down and not want to move on past this.

I soon started to feel myself squirming a little more, and when I looked towards the doors, I saw a pretty girl pull down her panties right in front of me, both of us blushing, and she sat on the toilet, me having seen her hairy front for a few seconds. I looked away in a hurry my face couldn’t be more fiery even if it were melting!

“Robyn saw Jade,” a girl behind called out teasing causing Jade to turn even redder. I wanted to crawl into a tiny hole or something, and then I started to get scared. What if in this dream, I produced a dick instead of girl parts?

That fear had caused me to run abruptly from the girls’ room, everyone looking after me, and I ran all the way down to the office, and stood in front of the counter, waiting to be acknowledged.

Now, my legs were writhing constantly, and I was sure people knew I was doing the pee-pee dance, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t go where I might produce a dick in front of a bunch of girls, and I was scared to go in the boy’s room and not produce one! I was trapped in a very sensitive situation.

“Please,” I called to an office attendant. “Can I talk to someone?”

“What is it, miss?” a woman finally acknowledged me.

“Can I talk to the nurse?” I asked desperately holding myself now, and writhing in place.

“Are you Robyn Berret?” the woman asked.

“Yes. Yes, I’m Robyn,” my voice was cracking from trying to hold it.

“Alright,” the woman said looking sympathetically at me. “This way.”

I went into the nurse’s office, and watching me do the pee-pee dance, she didn’t ask a single stupid question, but rather put her hands on my shoulders and directed me to the toilets in her office.

I pulled down my panties to find out that I was a girl, even under them, and that my panties were a little damp, though I convinced myself that it was sweat and not pee though I wasn’t really sure at that point which it was.

After I had peed in the toilet, my face red as Rudolph’s nose, I came out of the bathroom pulling up my panties, completely forgetting girl etiquette since I had little practice in being a girl. I met the nurse, and she smiled.

“Feeling better now?” she asked me.

“Much better,” I said sighing. However, deep down, I knew the difference of peeing, not because I knew how a girl feels, but that it certainly didn’t come out right. There were missing muscles, and the water sprayed out getting my butt a little damp instead of streamed out of an aim-able devise that I had been born with. It hit me, that none of this was dream. As impossible as it was, it was for real!

I’m so sorry, but I’ve been struggling how to get this story to make sense in my head, and now, hopefully, I’m on the right track. Thank you WBDaddy for your critiques with the original idea so that this piece could come out. I like it now. I might use the other place for rough drafts for feed back and then this one for the final copies of passable chapters.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Thank you WBDaddy: It passed his red pen, so here is Chapter Two added to the final draft.

Chapter Two
I sighed as I thought about everything that had happened at school that day. I was definitely stuck in a girl’s body, and only now, was I realizing that I had to come to terms with it. I had heard that girls had a lot more problems than boys all my life, but at the moment, minus an aimer, I still didn’t really know what those problems were.

I was once again, in a car, the lady that was supposed to be mom, now driving. I looked over at her, and there were so many questions I wanted to ask her, questions that might make being a girl easier for me, but I knew it might sound strange to her. More important than these questions, was that I had to figure out how I got here in the first place, and how to reverse it if it was possible. I didn’t want to do high school all over again, and I certainly didn’t want to be a confused little girl while I tried to do it.

“How was your first day,” the woman asked me.

“It wasn’t too bad,” I replied. “Mom?”

“Yes honey?”

“Can I ask you something strange?”

The woman looked over at me, and then back out the front of the car. She seemed to think about that for a minute, and finally, after several seconds, she seemed to reluctantly nod her head. “What is it, Robyn?”

“What kind of problems do we girls have that boys don’t?”

“What kind of problems?” and then she laughed. Her relaxation was far more pronounced than I thought it should be, but it felt good to see that she wasn’t staring at me like I was strange.

“Robyn, girls and boys are made differently. You know that already, but the problem is, most of society doesn’t acknowledge it, and it’s really difficult to be natural but accepted in a society that doesn’t understand that difference. They are very good at the lip service in recognizing it, but truthfully, there are a lot of inconveniences that boys take for granted.”

“Really?”

“I’m sure you’ve already noticed some of those differences on your own. It’s not like you are blind or dumb, Robyn. You might be a little slow sometimes, I’m sure you even know how girls are disadvantaged in life.”

I nodded my head though I really didn’t understand.

Mom just smiled and continued to drive. “You are waiting for examples, aren’t you? You want mommy to tell you specifically what I know that we have to do that boys don’t, right?”

I nodded slowly afraid that it might be going too far, but sincerely interested in having an idea of what I was expected to do differently in society.

“Well, do you remember asking me about toileting practices about three or four years ago?” the mother asked.

I shook my head since I never had that talk.

“You don’t remember? About when I explained about the monthly cycles?”

I shook my head again.

She looked put off by my ignorance. But after another few seconds, she whispered.

“Boys don’t have to count the days of a month, sweetie. They don’t worry about what their bodies are doing from moment to moment except when they feel like using the toilet, or when they are thinking about girls, much like we do, but we also have to think about the day of the month. You know?”

I could see she was trying to make me understand, and then I realized what she was saying.

“I already know that difference,” I said. “What I meant, was, what do…,” then I was lost for words. How do you explain that you want her to tell you how you should be viewing the world, that you wanted her to tell you how to talk, what language to use, what dreams were okay, and how girls really expressed those needs in a natural way? I didn’t see any way to do that.

“Never mind,” I finally sighed. “It was a stupid question.”

Mother just shrugged not sure what to say herself, I figured.

When we got home, I walked into the kitchen to look through the fridge for something to drink, when Uncle Jack came into the kitchen from the living room.

“How was your first day of high school?” he asked me.

“It was okay,” I said pulling out the milk.

“What are you doing with that milk?” he asked.

“Getting some?” I questioned now realizing I didn’t even know the rules of this house.

“It’s okay,” he said rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s just I’m a little surprised.”

“Why?” I asked thinking it looked like the healthiest choice in the fridge. Weren’t girls into being healthy and trying to keep their weight down?

“Well, you normally have a Doctor Pepper, don’t you?” he asked.

“Yeah, well, I guess I just craved some milk today.”

Jack chuckled at that. “Next you know, you’ll start watching those girl flicks,” he teased. “The Tom-boy turns.”

I blushed at his comment. So, was Robyn a tom-boy then? Did that mean I could do the things I liked without getting too much attention and worrying about being discovered until I figured out what had happened to me?

I drank down the milk, put the glass in the sink, and started to run up to the bedroom I had come out of. I wanted to see if there were any hints in there at all. There had to be, because I was left there to wake up. However the people that managed to turn me into a girl and put me in a strange house had done it, they had to have forgotten something that I could trace.

“Robyn,” Uncle Jack called up at me. “Don’t just lock yourself in that room and listen to music. You need to remember to do your homework, young lady!”

“It’s the first day of school, Uncle nosey,” I called back playfully. “They don’t give homework the first day!”

I ran into my room giggling and shut the door, and then realized there was no lock. Well, I guess he could get in and tickle me if he wanted. But he didn’t come up the stairs.

I pulled my skirt off, took off my panties which still had that cooling dampness in them, and then dropped my clothes on the floor by the dresser. I pulled out a pair of pink panties from the top drawer, took off my school top, and then looked for some shorts and a black t-shirt. All that time, no one came in to bother me, so that was a relief. Maybe they had expected it, I don’t know.

The next thing I did, was go back to looking though the mirror. Strangely enough, the room in the mirror looked just like my room in my old house though the reflection was this girl that I had become. I looked through the mirror trying to find any hint of something out of place in that other world, but everything seemed to be the way I remembered leaving things before I went to sleep.

I turned and looked at my new room, and I really couldn’t see anything that would give away how it was I was put here and made into a girl without my knowledge. I was never one to believe in magic. I even doubted that there was a God and believed that science would show us all that was really real, but logically, I couldn’t understand how this would be scientifically possible. There were so many anomalies that would be troublesome for science.

Why was it, that I was seeing my old room, even though I know for sure that this situation is real, and not a dream? If it was a dream, how was it that time was crawling around the right speed, and everything was beyond dreamlike. Every little action I took, I felt a real plausible reaction for. Even the cool coating milk had been felt running down my throat.

I kicked at the spot where I had thought I had seen the clothes from the night before. Someone had picked them up when I was in school, probably the uncle if mom was too busy to take me to school. What is going on?

Then, I felt it, a need to use the bathroom. Wait! Didn’t I just go before lunch at school? It wasn’t even four-thirty yet. Why did I have to go so soon? Normally, if I went at school, I’d be good to go until sometime into the evening. This was not normal at all. I sighed and walked to my door to pull it open, and after glancing in the rooms upstairs, I figured out that the door at the very end of the balcony had to be the bathroom. I pulled on it, but it was locked.

“I’m in here,” the uncle called out.

“Sorry,” I called back. “How long?”

“Well, I’m about to take a shower, honey. I thought you’d already gone to the toilet since you were up here for a while.”

“I forgot until now. Can I please?”

“No, I’m already undressed. You’ll just have to wait until I get out, honey.”

I sighed and went down the steps to wait in the living room. The bedroom was boring at the moment, and there were no other bathrooms in the house. Of course, with only three people, why would there need to be?

“Oh, you’re down from your room,” mom said surprised, but pleasantly so. “Do you want to watch television with me?”

“Yeah,” I nodded crossing my ankles hoping not to draw too much attention to something not so girl like to complain about.

“We’ll have tacos tonight,” mom said as she flipped through the channels until she came to ‘Cops.’

“Tacos?” I asked lighting up. I really did like tacos.

“Yeah, but I have to wait for Uncle Jack to take a shower and go pick up a couple of things for it.”

“I see,” I said smiling. “Mom, do you know what’s popular, and probably on TV right now?”

She shook her head at me. “No, I don’t honey. I’m not a teenager, you know. What’s on?”

“Um…,” I blushed almost scared to bring it up. Was it a boy’s show? Was it immature especially for a girl to watch? Well, I brought it up. “Can I watch Beverly Hills 90210?” I asked her.

“Sure, honey. I should have known you wanted to watch it. You like Brad Pitt, right?”

I nodded, though inside, I said yuck. The reason I liked it was Shannon Doherty.

I was a little relieved that it wasn’t too immature, and that the mother actually thought it was because I liked an actor, and truthfully it was because of that, but she would have freaked if I had corrected her. I think that she was one of those traditional people that would have had a hard time dealing if she had found out her daughter was gay, and then I started to worry.

What if the person that took my place was acting gay? That would totally make going back to my regular life a very difficult and awkward situation. I had to get back there, before she actually forced my male body into a girl’s bathroom and caused a ruckus. Maybe she already did. Damn it! Why did this have to happen to me? The more I thought about it, the more I had to admit that there had to be a counter person, and that meant she was trying to discover how to be a boy. She was probably even stroking my penis and trying to do things she had heard that boys liked to do even though I was very shy.

I saw the show start, and tried to get lost in that story so I could forget my own troubles, but it was no use. Not even Shannon Doherty could make me forget my troubles, that is, not until something had come up in the program that made my mouth drop.

“Bren, I need your help,” the hot blond was saying, though I still liked Shannon better. “My mom will kill me when she finds out about this.”

“Kelly, calm down,” Brenda said played by my idol. “Just listen carefully, a lot of us have gone through this before.”

I couldn’t see clearly, but it looked kind of like the hot blond had peed her pants, though the camera had cut away from that so fast, it was really hard to confirm what I thought I heard. And according to the Brenda character, a lot of girls have gone through that. Does that mean that girls sometimes pee their pants? I hoped not. Besides, how was that possible since I’d never seen any of them wet?

I looked from the television to the mom who smiled and whispered to me.

“She forgot her time of month,” she whispered. “She leaked in her panties and it soaked through her pants since she wasn’t wearing the right thing.”

I could tell that mom was being discreet in case the uncle came out at any moment, but what I understood that to mean, was that girls pee their pants when they have the time of month? And that they wear something, what, diapers, to hide it? I shook my head. So, that’s why they have diapers our size? Girls wear them when they get their monthly cycles. I would never make fun of my sister again when she had her time of month, if I ever got out of this, and I hoped I did before it was Robyn’s turn.

Finally, I heard Uncle Jack walking out of the bathroom, and I waited for another room door to close before I got up from my seat walking towards the steps.

“Robyn, are you still watching this?” mom asked.

“Yeah, but I need to, er… go do something.” Even as a boy I was shy, and I certainly felt uncomfortable talking about toilet needs even if it was just the mom. I wasn’t really Robyn, and if she ever found that out, I was afraid she might be really upset at what I had tricked her into telling me as a boy.

I walked up the steps, feeling the heavy pressure in my abdomen which seemed to affect my walk a little, and caused a little prickle of discomfort in my side. I really did have to pee kind of badly. I walked up the steps, not taking them as fast as I would have as a boy, because somehow, without the extra snake to hold back the pressure, I was scared it would just leak through if I wasn’t careful swaying up the stairs.

I gained the top, and looked back down much like you would have a long hike up a mountain trail, and with the same disappointment you would feel when you looked back and found that the distance covered really seemed much shorter than it should have been. I waddled further down the hall, nearly squatting now, my hand near the front of my pants scared I might start to leak, but resisting in trying to touch for fear that the uncle would come out and get the wrong idea.

I got into the bathroom, closed the door, and made it over to the toilet, but then there was a definite patter of leaks against the middle of my panties just before I yanked the shorts down and sat on the toilet. The pee streamed out so fast, I was glad I had just made it.

I leaned over, and peed hard, pushing it fast so it would end quickly, and to my surprise, it really didn’t take that long to finish. I then looked down at my panties, pulled them up from dry angles to inspect the damage, and noticed that they were damp, but that it didn’t leak through to the shorts, and feeling scared of changing panties for fear that someone would think I’m wetting my pants all the time, I elected to pull my panties up.

Thankfully, the damp area didn’t seem to irritate or bother me too much. I washed my hands, and walked out of the bathroom, and for the second time today, there was something I had forgotten to do, but I still didn’t think of it at the time.

Coming down the steps, I heard the ending music for the show, and I sighed. I missed the end. I was hoping to see how that played out since it looked like the girl must have wet herself, and I really wanted to know if her way of hiding it had really worked.

“Your uncle is going to get some stuff, and he’d like you to go with,” mom said as I entered the living room.

“Sure,” I shrugged walking towards the steps to the dining room and kitchen for the main entrance. “Anything you want me to remind him of?”

“No, he has a list, but you might want to make sure you have anything you need while you are shopping,” and she winked at me. I didn’t know what the wink meant, so I nodded and walked out to the car.

We didn’t really talk at all in the car for the first few minutes, but as I began wondering about things, I looked over at him. “Uncle Jack, what would you do, if you were trapped as a woman suddenly?”

He chewed on his lip for a moment, thinking about what I had asked. He didn’t seem to be angry at all, nor surprised. He just looked like he had never had an answer for that one.

“Well,” he said after several minutes. “I think I would hide in my room for a day to figure things out. I’ve heard that things are quite different for women from men, but having been a man all my life, I have no experience of such differences, so I would need some time to think about how to handle my new situation.”

I nodded. I wished I could have more private time to think things through, but then, no one told me to come down the stairs, so I guess really, just hiding in the room wasn’t the answer for me.

“Then,” he continued. “I might see if women really do have certain powers that seem to be so great in society.”

“Powers?” I asked wondering what he was referring to.

“Well, you should know that if you flirt just right, when it comes to guys that are interested in women, you can sometimes get your own way where as when guys try it, it often just backfires in our faces.”

“Oh?” I said thinking about that one. “But what could you possibly want from a guy that flirting would help you?”

“Well,” he seemed to be thoughtful. “You still don’t drive yet, on your own, but you know, if you are a girl, sometimes male cops are more lenient on you.”

“Isn’t that kind of discrimination?”

“You aren’t going to hear many woman call a police officer on that, and as a man, you’d be afraid of being laughed out of court trying to prove it, so even though you are technically right, it would never be seen as that.”

I pondered what he said for a minute. “Would that work with any law I broke?” I asked.

“I doubt it. The law you break would have to be harmless, and no one would have been hurt by it, then I think it would work. It can also get you a job easier in a nice place, if the employer thinks you are cute, even if you don’t know what you are doing.”

“That seems really wrong.”

“It is, but again, not many are going to push the issue. She had used her talents to get the position gaining every advantage she could to achieve the win. Men would be considered poor losers if they brought it up.”

I thought about what he was saying. Was it really an advantage to be a woman?

“So, you would actually like being a woman?”

He shook his head decisively no.

“There are a lot of disadvantages that we don’t like to talk about with being a woman, some way too hard for me to deal with.”

“Like?”

“Um… those kind of things are best discussed with mommy,” he said blushing. We’re here."

He brought me back to the idea that we were at the store to stop me asking anymore questions. I could tell, because he got out of the car rather quickly. I followed.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Now, I’m kind of getting into this story a bit, I’m no longer really checking with WBDaddy on every chapter, but I would still appreciate if he or anyone else has feedback about anything awkward. I’ll be glad to fix anything that seems to take away from the story.

Chapter Three

Well, I came back to the car, not really knowing what I needed that mom might have been hinting at. The uncle had not said anything, not that I’m sure he would, if it was a girl thing. So we got in, and we started our drive home.

“Uncle Jack,” I looked over at him my eyes giving flirty twitches at him.

“What is it, Robyn,” he seemed ready for me to start up my line of questioning again, but from the sound of his voice, I wasn’t so sure that was a good idea.

“Uncle Jack, did you get cheddar cheese?” I asked to change the topic at top speed before he got too irritated at me.

He looked over at me, probably gauging whether that had been my real intended question, but I just smiled at him and dropped the conversation. Really, that meant there was no one I could talk to about this, because with a real girl, it just felt too weird to ask her what it might be like for a boy to be girl. Besides, she probably had no idea.

I looked down at my shorts for a minute and then back at my driving uncle, as he had become. What I would give just to have someone to talk about these things with. Well, maybe I’ll just try to write down what I was feeling in a journal later. That might help me sort out my feelings at least.

We pulled up to the house, and I walked straight up to my room, and closed the door not talking to anyone. I was sure that Jack was too embarrassed by my line of questioning to really talk comfortably with the woman about it, so it was likely no one would have a ‘little talk’ with me. I laid across the bed on my stomach thinking for a bit.

This really sucks, being a girl, I mean. Well, so far, I haven’t noticed anything interesting about it other than feeling like I don’t know what I’m doing. It feels like I just need to stop worrying about it, but I was sure there was something I had not prepared for yet. I wanted to talk to someone, but no one had my experience that I knew of, so who would I talk to? Uncle Jack had already shut me down and talking to the mom of the adults seemed too weird.

I twisted over so I was on my back, and banged my head against the pillow at the head of my bed. I hit it with both hands, and I kicked the foot of my bed with my left foot, raising it high into the hair and making it land hard on the bed causing it to bounce.

I rolled over again, this time, out of the bed, and I walked over to the mirror looking through it to study my old room. It was empty in there save for the girl reflection staring back at me. What I would do to change the image back the way it was supposed to be.

I looked over at my door, just moments before it opened, and I saw Uncle Jack look in on me.

“Robyn,” he called to me. “Can I talk to you?” he asked at the door.

“Sure. Come in,” I smiled and went back to my bed to sit. He sat in one of the chairs at the square table in the middle of the room, but moved it to face my direction and to be a little closer.

“Robyn,” he started sounding a little nervous at what he was going to say. “I didn’t mean to blow you off in the car. I know you are having difficulties with finding who you are, but you are not gay,” he blushed. “I know because you never even think of wearing boys’ undies, and you are not really doing anything boy-like at the moment. You are just confused.”

I sighed thinking he must be really clueless. Of course, who wouldn’t be? It’s not like this kind of thing really happens to anyone. This is not a question of me being strange in that sense, but rather a question in how to deal with a real physical change that cannot easily be reversed, unless I find out how it happened to begin with.

“I didn’t say I was gay,” Robyn said. “I was asking you these questions, because, I just… needed some advice that is related. It has nothing to do with trying out the other sex,” I said trying to lay his fears to rest.

“In that case, what were you going to ask me in the car earlier?” he asked.

I shook my head. I had forgotten.

“Well, I don’t know why you aren’t talking to your mom about these things, but it’s okay. I’ll be around to talk if you need to talk again. I just don’t want you to think that I think it’s okay for you to go different colors on us.”

“I understand,” I told him not really happy with the ‘different colors’ that were handed to me to begin with. “If I have more questions, I’ll ask you.”

He smiled and stood up. There seemed to be nothing else for us to say to each other at the moment. I stood up, and I walked over to him. I felt a little funny doing so, because he was a guy, and underneath somewhere, I was sure I was too, still, but I felt he was waiting for it, so I hugged him briefly. Thankfully, he accepted my brief hug and walked out of my room.

I walked back to the mirror looking carefully at the image of my room, and that’s when I saw it! My image had just walked into the room, and it was peering into the mirror. He looked as though he was trying to see something past what it was, and I wondered if that person was as confused as I was. I waved at who I thought was the real Robyn hoping she’d notice, but it looked like she looked right through me. The male shook his head at me, and then turned towards my bed. He laid down on it, and then picked up a history book to read! Yuck! What was she doing to my image? I hated to read about history when given the choice! I had all sorts of nice books under the mattress! Why didn’t she read them?

I walked over to her bed and lifted up the mattress, and then I saw it, a pink little book with a lock in it. It must have been her diary. Maybe if I read this, I might figure out what she had done to do this, and maybe I could even reverse it.

There was another annoying knock at the door, and my uncle stuck his head in again.

“Dinner is ready, Robyn,” he called. “Your mom said you are to come down and eat whether you say no or not.”

I sighed and walked out of the room, throwing Robyn’s diary on the bed cover.

We both had the same hiding places, it seemed, but I doubted she’d appreciate what I kept under my mattress. Those magazines were all of nearly naked models.

I walked down to the kitchen and sat at the table. I looked over at the uncle, and he smiled at me. I smiled back. Then mom came to the table with a tray of taco shells, freshly deep fried, plate after plate of taco stuffings like cheese, lettuce, tomatoes and so on, and finally the meat. When she sat down, I waited nervously, and just as I thought, the uncle started to pray.

I bowed my head politely and waited for him to finish. When he said amen, I looked up at them both, they smiled at me, and I smiled back, and then we started to eat. Apparently, they didn’t force you to say amen in this house. I could live with that.

I looked from my uncle to my mom nervously, wondering if he said anything to her at all about what I had asked him, but it seemed if he had, they were both intent on not saying anything about it. I was grateful for that, but also nervous that it would come up any minute out of the blue. I was so nervous, that by halfway into dinner, I was starting to wiggle my legs out of nervousness.

Uncle Jack narrowed his eyes at me, but said nothing. Mom shook her head, but said nothing. They both just looked at each other, and the not knowing how much they had talked was starting to be maddening. I stopped eating at one point, even though I wasn’t full, the tacos were really good, and it was my favorite dish, and I put the taco on my plate.

Mother suddenly stood up and walked over behind my chair and whispered into my ear. I was certain that Uncle Jack could still hear, but he pretended not to.

“Robyn, if you need to use the bathroom, you should excuse yourself instead of sitting there trying to hold it.”

“I don’t,” I blushed. “I mean, that’s not why I’m nervous.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier on you if you told us why you were nervous then? We can’t help you unless you tell us,” she was still whispering even though I had said ‘I don’t’ in a non-whisper though a very low tone.

“Um…, I don’t think I should bother you with it,” I told her.

“I think you should,” she said back, a low tone now starting to emerge rather than a whisper. “I already know you were talking to Uncle Jack about strange feelings you were having. It’s okay to be confused, Robyn. But if you don’t talk to us about them, then the confusion can cause you more difficulties.”

I blushed deeper, now knowing for a fact that Uncle Jack had said something.

“So, what exactly brought on you talking about him becoming like a girl? Did you have a strange dream about it, or did someone at your school say something weird again about silly things?”

I shook my head not able to believe she would take the truth of the matter well at all, and that she might even think I was going crazy if I said even half of what I thought.

“I think it’s time for another appointment with your doctor,” she said frowning.

“My doctor?” I asked nervously. “Why do I have to see a doctor?”

“Oh come, now, honey,” mom smiled. “You like Doctor Cobb, remember? He is the kind person that you can tell anything to, and everything you say to him is a secret.”

I looked down thinking great, he must be a psychologist or something. Would he really be able to help, or would he think that Robyn was just getting closer to losing her mind. Why was Robyn seeing him so regularly anyway? Was I in a crazy girl’s body? Damn, why couldn’t I at least be in a normal girl’s life, if this was going to happen to me?

I nodded and that pleased mom enough that she walked back to her place to eat.

“Go ahead and eat,” Uncle Jack pointed at my taco. “It won’t help things if you go hungry, and you were telling me all about it the other day, that you missed when your mom made tacos.”

Robyn likes tacos, too? Well, at least there was something that we had in common. I picked up one of the tacos on my plate and started munching again. My legs were now more twitchy though, and it really did look like I was doing the potty jig in my seat, but it had nothing to do with that.

“Robyn, I so want to trade lives back,” I said under my breath hoping that Uncle Jack and mom were not paying much attention. Of all the bullying I had put up with for being shy, and all the fear I and aloneness I had felt in my own life, I could still deal with it. I was used to it, but I was completely out of my wit in this life. I wanted my controlling mother back, my bullies back, and everything that was normal to me.

The three of us finished up our dinner, and then I stood up, my hands shaking so much when I started to pick up the plates, that Uncle Jack came around the table in a hurry and grabbed them from my hands.

“You take a break today,” he said. “I’ll wash the dishes today.”

I looked at him as if he had just slapped a bee away from my face before it stung me. I had never been told to ignore some chore at my own home, in my other life, because even when I wasn’t feeling well, my mother thought I was well enough to do the chores as long as I was well enough to get out bed enough to eat. But here, this Uncle Jack was taking a chore from Robyn, and I wasn’t entirely sure of why.

Mother walked over to me, and she put an arm around me.

“Why don’t we get you up to bed?” she asked me soothingly.

What was going on? Did mother think I’d break if I went up there by myself? I looked at her for a moment, trying to read her thoughts, but this situation and these people were so foreign to me, that I couldn’t understand a thing about their actions, other than that they were worried for some reason.

I was walked into my room, where mom bent down and started to unfasten my shorts. I put my hands over my shorts button and tried to pry her hands off.

“I can do that,” I whined not wanting her to pull down my shorts.

“Honey, you need help tonight. Something has caused you a lot of stress, or you wouldn’t be shaking like you are, and closing off from talking to us. Whatever gave you the notion to ask your uncle those questions, it is scaring you, baby.”

She continued to work on pulling down my shorts, and then my tights. I was scared she’d see the dribble in my panties from earlier, but if she did, she didn’t say anything. She just lifted my shirt off of me, undid my bra, and then while I sat on the bed, she walked over to my closet and pulled out an extra-long shirt that she slipped over my head. When I stood up, it dropped to just over my hips so my panties were completely hidden.

“Robyn, you just relax in your room until you fall asleep,” mom said. “You need to remember that the doctor said the best thing for you when you start feeling anxious, is to have enough alone time to think things through, and then to come and get mommy when you are ready to talk.”

I nodded not knowing what else to say or do about it. I knew I wasn’t really suffering from anxiety, or anything more than just wanting out of this strange body and back into my own life and my own world, where I knew everything that was going on.

It was true, though, that I couldn’t stop wiggling my legs, that my arms and hands were shaking terribly, and that my heart was pumping as if I had run a long race or something. I could see why they thought I was scared or something, but there was nothing I could think to say that would convince the mom that all of this was natural—for someone that had changed bodies with a complete stranger, and moreover, that that stranger was the opposite sex, and apparently with ‘craziness’ diseases.

I laid on my back, and I thought a little bit about my little sister knocking on my door, and whispering through it, that she had some kind of problem that she wanted ME to help her with because mom would hit the ceiling over it. It annoyed me that she always bugged me, but right now, I wanted to hear her familiar pleas, and to have her hug me and thank me for being a stable big brother she could come to for help. I wanted to hear my dad yell at me about being a man, and about how I should be working already, so I would understand hard work. I missed how he tried to set me up with side jobs just to get me some experience, and I missed how my mom would complain about my room, and about how irresponsible I was when I didn’t want to help with the house chores. I missed it all, but that was really only just yesterday.

I sighed as I thought about them, and I felt my eyes closing.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter Four

I don’t remember when I dozed off in that other world, but somehow, when I woke up in my own bed, the familiar clock next to me buzzing at me that it was six thirty in the morning, I was so happy to be home. I pulled the blankets off me too fast to realize anything else that was going on, and I walked over to my dresser confident that today would go as if yesterday had never happened. Maybe it was all a dream after all.

I reached into the dresser top drawer, and pulled out some blue panties, a bra, and an undershirt, just like any other morning, and I walked into the bathroom not seeing anything contradictory at all in what was happening.

The flat house was just the same as ever, and I could imagine my mother and father sleeping in their own rooms, or maybe mom was up making breakfast, I wasn’t sure just yet. I was sure my sister was still asleep in her own room though. I walked into the bathroom, and when I looked into the mirror, my eyes grew large and my mouth dropped!

I was still a girl?

I looked in my hands again, and realized I had young teenage girl clothes in my hands. What the hell was this? I ran to the toilet, and pulled my long night shirt up and pulled my panties down and sat on the toilet, checking to see which organ I had. It was still the girl one, and pee started to pour out of it as I sat there.

This couldn’t be real! Someone in this house would definitely notice that I was a girl, wouldn’t they? I stood up and pulled up my panties and let my shirt drop. I left the clothes on the toilet seat, and I ran back to my room to see if I could find any boy clothes at all, but that’s when I saw the other James, who was probably Robyn. He was pulling out boxers and stuff that I should be wearing, getting ready for his morning shower.

“James,” I called to him. “Robyn?”

He didn’t respond. Now, what was going on? I was feeling like my head was really being addled at this point, and I wanted whoever was behind it to just stop it. I pinched at myself, but found that I was translucent both in image and in reality, much like a ghost. I shook.

The boy smiled to himself as he walked down towards the bathroom, and when I got there, the clothes that I had dropped off were gone. He started to strip, and he stood in front of the toilet, must like I used to, and he let the water drain from MY snake. I wanted to kick him, and to demand that he change us back. However, I had the feeling that he couldn’t even see me.

“James,” I said louder at him this time, but still he ignored me as he then adjusted the shower to his liking.

What was I going to do? He didn’t even know I was there, spying on him, and it seemed I couldn’t do anything that would get his attention, then I remembered that my sister sometimes said she could see ghosts. I wondered if this Robyn had been sneaking peeks in my house, and if Katie had caught her. I decided to go look in on my sister.

“Katie,” I called to her as she slept.

Her eyes popped open, and she whispered out at me. “Robyn? Is that you?”

So, Robyn had talked to her enough that my sister even knew her name. Now that was irritating. “I’m here,” I whispered to her. “How has your brother been treating you?” I asked curiously.

“Strangely,” she said scratching her head. “Why do you care about that, though?”

“Because, he’s not really your brother right now,” I said. “He’s pretending to be me for some reason, and he has trapped me back in his world.”

“Wait, are you James?” she asked me in the dark quiet of the room.

That was the last because just after the question, my old world started to fade from view, and something pulled me through an empty void of sorts, as if I was waking from a dream. I felt light against my eyes as they fluttered, and then I sat up, in Robyn’s room, and saw her mother staring at me from across the room at the door.

“Robyn? I’ve called you five times. Are you okay?”

I nodded.

When she left, I sighed and climbed out of bed, relieved to find that at least I had not leaked in the night though I really had to pee this morning. I walked to my dresser, or Robyn’s dresser, or whatever, and I pulled frantically for the clothes I wanted to wear, even though I could feel my muscles twitching because I had to pee so badly.

I walked out of the room, now with the new clothes to wear for the day in hand, and towards the bathroom where I found the door closed and locked. I hoped my uncle wasn’t in there taking forever again, because I really had to pee bad.

“Who’s in there?” I called.

“I am,” mom’s voice came back.

“Can you please hurry? I don’t know how much longer I can wait.”

“I’ll be right out!”

Uncle Jack looked at my back, and when I turned to see him watching me wiggle in front of the door, he smiled at me.

“Gotta go pretty bad, huh?”

I blushed and nodded.

He walked down the steps into the main part of the house while I turned back to the door, writhing in discomfort while my mom finished. I hoped I didn’t pee my pants right there, while waiting for her, but luckily, she came out in time, and I ran past her and sat on the toilet just in time.

Mom closed the door shaking her head, and then I thought for a moment to myself. “Why was it such an emergency? I’ve had to pee in the mornings before, but never have I come that close to an emergency. Was my body starting to fail me beyond being stuck in a girl’s body to boot?”

I shook my head at the notion, and turned on the shower a few moments later after I had been relieved. How could just changing bodies make you weaker? I had seen most of Robyn’s room by now, and nothing in it indicated she ever had pee-pee accidents. Most of her undies were nice and clean without so much as a wipe stain in them, though recently, I had caused a couple of them to ruin that record by forgetting to wipe like a girl should. Her bed was dry and had no tell-tell signs of being a bed-wetter, and well, the clues all pointed to a normal teenage girl with some psychological issues.

I carefully walked into the warm shower and started to wash. The hot water seemed to drain away the worries, and I stopped trying to look for a problem that most likely wasn’t there. I had enough real problems as it was.

I climbed out of the shower, and put my clean clothes on, now seeing the pee-pee stain in the panties I wore the day before. I knew I had not really peed my pants in them, or at least not badly, so I started to think about it. Why were they so stained? Then I looked down at my clean panties, and at the toilet, then I remembered. Girls sit to pee, and it does splatter. In the last day, I had not wiped at all. Most likely, most of this stain was because of that. I blushed and took my panties to the sink to wash them out.

While I was washing out the stain in the panties, there was a knock at the bathroom door.

“Robyn,” Uncle Jack called through. “When you get finished in there, I have to take you to school again. Your mom has an important meeting this morning.”

“I got it,” I said through the door.

“What are you doing in there?”

“Nothing—er… brushing my teeth.”

“Well, hurry up.”

I finished washing out the panties, I brushed my teeth and fixed up my hair a little bit also applying some light make up. It looked a little strange in the mirror, but it was all over my face like a toddler. I hoped I had done it right.

I ran down the stairs, but my uncle saw me, and he shook his head.

“Are you trying to make a statement?” he asked me.

Taking my hand, he brought me back up to the bathroom and he insisted on washing off all the make up on my face.

“Your mother would have killed me if I let you go to school like that. Just forget the make up for this morning. It isn’t important. Getting good grades is important.”

I nodded, but I knew that going without anything would definitely make the others laugh at me. I wondered how I had gotten the make up the day before, and then I couldn’t remember applying any at all. Dang it! I hoped no one realized that I didn’t wear make up the day before, and that they’ll ignore it today too.

Well, I arrived in the same lunch room, and looking around, it seemed as though no one was really staring at me. I was dressed in a pair of faded jeans and yellow top that was plain. My hair was hurriedly done, as I had no experience with girl-hair, so besides the lack of make-up, I also felt as though my hair would draw attention to me as well.

“Boo,” a girl snuck up behind me and called out so I jump.

“Jumpy much?” the girl asked with a cheery sound in her voice. I turned and saw it as…Katie, my sister."

“Um…, hi Katie,” I tried to act as if it were natural to see her there. I didn’t know her friends that well, so I had no idea that she knew Robyn at all.

“Hey, Robyn. What did you do to your hair?” she asked. “Want me to fix it for you?”

I nodded, and we went towards the girl bathrooms, again, another place where I was feeling apprehensive and nervous of. Luckily, fixing my hair meant I could turn my back to the open toilets, and Katie went to work fixing my hair.

Wait, if Katie knew this Robyn, and when I was being a ghost in that dream, was it really the same Robyn? How weird would that be, especially for her not to realized it was the same person. Maybe the scene from last night was really just a dream.

I shuddered, and Katie’s squealing laugh caused me to turn to face her.

“What’s so funny?” I asked her.

“Nothing,” she said turning my head straight again with confidence, and then going to work on my soft shiny strawberry blond hair. “It’s just you are always so confident, and now, you seem so jittery,” she said laughing. “You’d think we changed places or something.”

I giggled a little trying to play as natural as I could.

I was soon good as new, playing it off as playing around, I let Katie help me get my hair fixed, get my make-up in place, and then I walked off to my first class bidding her good day with the promise we’d meet at lunch time.

Alright, so it looked like I had actually changed places a little closer to home than I thought. That might be a good thing. That meant, it might be possible to reverse this little situation before it got out of hand. What I was still thinking most about though, was whether Katie’s friend and her ghost, were really the same person or not as I walked into my first period.

Once again, I had survived through nearly half a school day when I found myself in Mr. Hastings’s class, in what was to regularly become my seat, and waited for him to start class. Once again, I thought I felt my bladder filling up even though I had actually visited the bathroom just before PE on this day to make sure there was no trouble in Mr. Hastings’s class. He could be such a bear about rules.

“I just went,” I scolded myself under my breath. “You hold it, or else,” I left the threat dangling in the air at myself.

‘Is Heaven Mars?’ was the newest title of the selection we were reading. Mr. Hastings allowed us to read it quietly in class, having forgotten to assign it as homework for us, he said.

That teacher never forgets to assign homework, and I was sure that there was some other hidden agenda behind him wanting us to do this reading in class instead.

As we finished the rather short section, I felt my bladder getting heavy, and I felt a prickle of sensitive tingling desire at the end of my pee tube, but I knew I had to ignore it.

“Now,” Mr. Hastings continued with the lesson. “I would like each of you to think about the visualizations made in this story, and give me some explanation about why you believe, according to this story, that they are really in heaven or they are not in heaven. Back up your theories with facts you draw from the story or your own real understanding of the world.”

I sighed. I thought I remembered this particular assignment because it was the first time I had actually gotten a D on an English assignment. I had always thought, until this class, that I was a strong writer.

I sighed and thought about it. True, I wasn’t really Robyn, and her grades really didn’t matter to me, however, there was some kind of pride still left in here, about who I really was, and I couldn’t just ignore the challenge to do this assignment. I had always wanted to redo it, actually, because once I understood what he was looking for, I had thought I could do it much better. He never did allow me to redo it, so now, really, it was my secret chance to get back at him, and throw it in his face that I was a better writer than he gave me credit for. Well, too bad he didn’t know it was really me, because that would definitely add insult to injury when he realized I had redone the assignment, and had actually forced him to give someone an A+ because of MY work.

I struggled to hold myself still, not wanting people to associate the squeaking noises of the day before with me once again. I was not about to be called a baby for not being able to plan my trips to the bathroom better, no matter the reason for it. I was able to wait just like anyone else! I am a high school student, and this body it going to learn that there are indeed correct times to go, and times it had to wait.

I listened as intently as I could, and when I had the directions, I pulled out a piece of paper, and I started to mark down notes of all the evidence that it could be heaven, and then I started to look for flaws in those pieces. I would prove that heaven was impossible, and that this was really all a hallucination brought on by maybe over fatigue and excitement that something unexplained may have been found.

As I wrote down the third phrase I wanted to use in my essay, I felt my bladder pulse rather strongly, and a dooming feel of something playing inside my stomach dropped and made me wait a moment, squint my eyes, and hold my nervous legs together for a few seconds, then the feeling went away, and I went back to knee banging again as I twitched a pencil in my fingers thinking about the assignment. I knew I had to pee soon, but I was NOT going to ask two days in a row in this class. That was asking for trouble.

The nervous slapping of my knees, however, was picking up in speed as the hour wore on, and before the end of class, other students were stealing glances at me. When I thought I saw someone, they looked away blushing, and I blushed. I was sure that most everyone knew before the end of the period, that I had to pretty badly, now, but that did not stop me from trying to wait. Truth be told, every one of the students in that class would find him or self in this situation at least once before the year was over, so I wasn’t worried about what they thought.

The bell rang, and I started to stand up, but Mr. Hastings called me to his desk.

“Yes sir?” I asked timidly.

“Come here,” he ordered again, and I walked nervously towards him, knowing that the longer I waited, the more I was playing with fire.

He didn’t speak until the last student left the room, then he practically whispered as he spoke with me.

“Do you wear diapers?” he asked me bluntly.

“No,” I said feeling scared now.

“Do you have a doctor’s note saying you need to be released from classes immediately if you have the need to pee?” he continued.

“No,” I was not blushing so red, it was impossible to hide it, and tears were welling in my eyes. Not only did he notice my wiggling, but he somehow thought I had no more control over my bladder than a baby did or something.

“Then you will stop making that racket in this class,” he scolded me. “Go to the toilets before class so you don’t have to ask during class, and so you are not distracting other students.”

“Yes sir,” I whispered tears coming to the corners of my eyes.

He smiled at me. That bastard smiled at me, and he gestured to the door.

“Better go off now, before you pee your pants, sweetheart,” he whispered to me. I walked away from him and got to the door very upset at what he had said to me. That was when I suddenly felt a gush of something coming over me, and trying to flood out. I ran towards the bathrooms forgetting about my lesson the day before. When I got in there, it was so full of other girls, that I ran out of the bathroom, and down the hall to the nurse’s room. I pushed the door open, and seeing so many kids in there, I blushed, but called out to the nurse anyway.

“Please help me!” I called.

The nurse came over immediately, and when she got close enough, I blurted out to her.

“I have to pee, and the toilets in the girls’ room are full with lines a mile long! Please, I’m not going to make it that long!”

She ushered me back to the toilets, where I immediate yanked down my jeans and panties and sat on the toilet, water squirting from me moments before I got on the toilet so that the toilet seat got wet.

The nurse shook her head and closing the door, disappeared to give me a little privacy.

What the hell? I wanted to know. I was furious with myself. Why the hell can’t you wait two damned fucking hours? I wondered. It wasn’t that long! It was even shorter than yesterday! This is stupid! I finished peeing in the toilet, but when I came out of the bathroom looking as though nothing were wrong, the nurse pulled me aside.

“Robyn, please have a seat,” she said. “Your mom called me this morning and told me you were showing signs of depression or nervousness again. Can you tell me if the conditions in the bathrooms might be causing you discomfort?”

I nodded.

“If you are so scared to use the girls’ rooms, just come here between classes. There are not as many students in here, and the room is private, so you won’t have to wait so long, and no one will see you peeing. Will that help you?”

I didn’t know what other answer would work, so I just nodded. At least if the nurse thought it was nervousness, maybe I could go right after PE and get a nurse’s note so the teacher wouldn’t mark me late to class. That seemed like the perfect solution. Now, I shouldn’t have to pee in that class ever again. That gave me a feeling, as though a tank had been lifted off of a flatbed truck, and the trailer was finally able to relax.

I walked out of the nurse’s office a little happier and into the lunch room and scanned it for my little sister. Not more than a few seconds into the search, I saw her sitting alone at a square table.

“Katie,” I said sitting down without getting anything to eat. “I have something I am dealing with. I don’t know if you want to hear me out on it, and it is strange, but if you want to, I’d like to talk to you about it.”

Katie nodded. “I’m always here for you, Robyn,” she said.

“Well, two days ago, I’ve found myself in a very unfamiliar situation, and I really feel scared and beside myself at what to do about it.”

“Can you describe it better?” Katie prodded.

“I want to, but I’m afraid I’ll sound crazy. It’s… it’s like I’m not really Robyn lately.”

“Go on,” she seemed to be quite patient.

“Well, I woke up yesterday, and when I did, everything was wrong.”

“Yeah?” Katie tried not interrupt the story, but to show that she was listening and following me.

“I woke up, and I felt like I was in the wrong bed. The room was all different, and the clothes were not mine, and then I went to school, and I felt like I was in all the wrong classes.”

“I see,” she said slowly. “You told me last year that you were nervous about starting high school. Do you think it has anything to do with that?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know, but it feels even more than that. It’s like I can’t even control my body lately.”

“Control your body?” she was really curious now. I could tell by the classic tilt of her head as her finger went to the side of her neck. “What do you mean you can’t even control your body lately?”

“I almost wet my pants in English today.”

“Oh, that,” she blushed. “That teacher should go to teacher prison, and be denied all human rights there ever were. My brother warned me about him, and though I didn’t believe him at first, I know he made another girl wait in class today even though she told him several times that she was going to pee her pants.”

“Oh,” I blushed. “Did she wet her pants?”

“I don’t think so, but she was really scared, and near tears. I had to help her to the bathroom after class and when I got into the bathroom, I called out that Mr. Hastings made her wait, and that she was scared she’d pee any minutes, and because everyone felt sorry for her, everyone let her go to the front of the line, and I think she made it, at least mostly.”

“Wow,” I said. “So, no one made fun of her for not being able to wait?”

“Why would we? It’s not like she held off on purpose. Everyone knows that Mr. Hastings is an asshole.”

I smiled.

“So, um…, don’t worry about it, if you were scared you were about to pee your pants. I think all of us are going to be in that boat at some time.”

“Well, he not only made me wait, but he knew I had to go, and he told me that if I was wiggling tomorrow, I might be in trouble.”

Katie looked down.

I looked down.

“You shouldn’t make noises or make it noticeable that you have to go,” Katie said. “My brother claims that the teacher had caused a girl to shit her pants in class once, and then didn’t even let her out of the room until the period was over on threat of giving her a zero for the semester. You should never let those kind of people see when you are weak.”

“What was I supposed to do?” I asked. “If I didn’t do everything I was doing, I’d have probably leaked in my panties.”

“So?”

I blushed. How could my sister say so to that?

“It’s better to wear damp panties and no one really knowing you have to go, than to be making all that noise and then get noticed when you are flooding your pants in front of the enemy, isn’t it?” she asked.

“Well, the movement was to prevent me from flooding my pants,” I retorted.

“Robyn, honestly, if you keep your pants dry all year in that class, I’ll have more respect for you than I even do now. I don’t think half of the girls in my class are going to stay dry in that class all year. And I suspect that even a boy might have an accident.”

“Why did you say even a boy?”

“Surely you know that boys are like tanks. For every time they pee, we girls have to go at least three times a day. Did you know my brother rarely ever goes to the bathroom at school at all, and if he does, then it’s an off day, and it’s only once?”

“You’re kidding,” I said trying to say something that sounded naturally surprised, though I was surprised that girls actually seemed to admit that they couldn’t go all day waiting like that.

“Well, there’s more,” I said dropping my voice a little more. “I… I am not really Robyn.”

Katie laughed thinking I was joking now. “And I’m not Katie. Say, let’s switch names and see what our teachers do in class with us.”

I smiled and let it drop at that. It was going to be impossible to get her to understand at the moment. Then, I started to think about how the intruder at home was treating her.

“How has your brother been with you lately?” I suddenly laid it on her.

“Not bad,” she said. “But somehow, I feel like he wants me to stop bugging him so much.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I saw a ghost again last night, and when I went to his room to ask him to check my closet once again, well, he wouldn’t do it, and I had to get dad.”

“Oh,” I looked down feeling awkward that I couldn’t be there to help her. “Do think he might have just been a little preoccupied?”

“Any other time, yeah, I’d agree with you. But this morning, he didn’t give me a ride to school even though we go to the same school, and in the morning, he didn’t take me to my first class again like he promised. I thought he was so scared of me getting lost in this big school, but lately, he acts like it doesn’t matter to him what I do.”

I sighed. It was time for little sis to grow up a little, but it did make me feel bad that I couldn’t be there for her as she started the most difficult leg in growing up. I wanted to get back to my own body and to be there, and to chase boys away from her that I didn’t like, but I couldn’t. at least not at the moment.

“Well, I guess he had to grow up sometime,” Katie said sighing. “He couldn’t stay with me forever to protect me. I always told him I hated him for it, but deep down, now I miss it, and regret telling him to mind his own business when he checked in on me.”

I felt a tear come to my left eye.

“But don’t tell him that,” she said. “He’d gloat and say he told me so for forever!”

I laughed thinking I probably would have to, under any other situation, but right now, I felt that what I would do, would be to hug her and tell her she’d never have to worry about me leaving her stranded when she needed help.

When my sister got up, after everything I learned about that teacher, and fearing that my sister was scared to have mom called, I looked at her bottom, but she was dry.

I left my sister to go on with the rest of my day, and at the end of another day, the car was outside waiting for me again.

“Mom, when are you going to let me take the bus?” I asked her suddenly. “None of the other parents pick up their kids in high school.”

“I’m sorry, honey, but while you are having these anxiety symptoms, I have to think about what is best for you, not what is popular.”

“I’m not having anxiety,” I told her stomping my foot. “Tomorrow, if you show up in the car, I’m walking home.”

“Alright, alright, you can take the bus in the morning,” she nodded. “Just please, be really careful, okay?”

I nodded.

“Today, I have to take you to see Doctor Cobb, anyway, so I’d have had to pick you up anyway.”

“What if I don’t want to see that corny quack?” I asked.

“Well, you wouldn’t have a choice,” Mom looked at me a little harder. “I would just make you stay in your room every day until you agreed to see him.”

I didn’t doubt she would.

When we got to a parking area for a small clinic, I felt my head spin a little. What was I going to tell him that would be believable? He would likely see through any lie I told, and besides not knowing how to really act like a girl, I had no idea how a crazy stressed out teenager with anxiety spoke.

I walked into the clinic and took a seat in the all but empty waiting room. At least there was no one I knew there.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter Five
I had come out to the car, and gotten in it without even a thought for the toilet, but as we were half way to the doctor, mom reminding me I had to see him, I suddenly felt like I had to pee. Well, whatever, I was going to teach this body that while I was here, I was boss, and so I said nothing.

Now, as I sat in the waiting room, I glanced down the hall where I thought I saw signs for boy and girl washrooms, and then I looked up at the front counter. Since there were no other people in the waiting room, I figured they’d call me any minute, and something told me that if I went to the bathroom right now, mom would think I was just try to stall, so I decided to wait for them to call me.

Interestingly, I was waiting ten minutes, no one called. I got up and walked over to the book and started to leaf through the interesting magazines there. Mom watched me, as if she thought I was going to try to make a run for it, but I knew that making a run for it would only put me right back here later, so it was better just to get it over with.

Twenty-five minutes later, I was sitting in the chair next to mom, reading through a comic that I had never seen before, and my legs were starting to rub and do the knee bounces. I looked up at the clock, and after taking in it had been twenty-five minutes since I got there, and still seeing no one else in the clinic, I figured they’d have to call me sooner than later.

“What were they waiting for?” I wondered to myself. “No one is fucking here,” and I really wanted to get this over with so mom wouldn’t think I was just trying to duck away and go pee.

I sighed as I looked back to the receptionist who just looked up at the clock and then smiled at me. Was she waiting for something from me? I couldn’t understand what was going on. Why didn’t she just call me?

After nearly forty minutes, finally, I heard the name “Robyn Barret” called and I stood up to walk over where the nurse opened a private door, and I walked in. It seemed that mom waited outside.

“Please, come in, Robyn,” a man with dark hair, a short beard just around his mouth and chin but not covering his neck or the sides of his face. “Please have a seat,” he said.

“May I go use the toilet first?” I asked in a low voice a little scared he might say no. He shook his head.

“Robyn, we talked about this before. I will always wait thirty minutes from the time you get here to call you back so you have time to go. If you waited all that time out there without going, then really, you are doing this to yourself, and I’m not going to care if you pee your pants. You need to learn to go before you see me, period.”

I looked at him as if he had scolded me for no reason and what he was saying was not only ridiculous, but unreasonable.

“Robyn, you do this every time,” he said shaking his head. “And I told you, if you tried the avoidance thing again, I would make you sit there and talk to me anyway, even if that meant you peed your pants in front of me. Don’t you remember that?”

I shook my head honestly.

“Well, you will remember it from now on, if you actually have an accident,” he said gesturing to his sofa. “It’s either that, or I’ll call your mom in to control you, and you can explain to her why you were holding it in the waiting room in front of me.”

I shook my head and walked to the sofa, which I found to be covered in a special plastic. Was this the way it always was, or did he prepare it especially for the avoiding Robyn?

“Now, why don’t you start from the beginning of when you started to feel uncomfortable in the last couple of days,” the doctor said looking down at his notes.

I sighed and looked up at him, my knees curled up as I lay my head on the pillow end of the sofa. My knees wobbled a little as I tried to press my muscles closed.

“Robyn, you can’t leave unless you say the minimum words, remember?”

I nodded even though I didn’t remember any such things. This was the first time I had ever been taken to see a doctor that was like this. I wanted to tell him to leave me alone, and to let me use the toilet, but there was something calm about him that actually made me fear speaking against him. He was so confident in what he was doing.

“I’m not really Robyn,” I said in a low voice.

“What was that?”

“I’m not Robyn,” I said a little louder figuring that saying something, however crazy it sounded, might end my torture sooner.

“I see. Then who are you?” he asked.

“My name is James.”

“I see. So, now you are James,” he wrote something on his clipboard. “I suppose that there are some things that look easier as a boy than as a girl,” he said trying to get me to talk about it. “Would you like to tell me some of the difficulties in being a girl, or maybe some of the things you wish you could do as a boy?”

I looked down. “Actually, I thought it was easier to be a girl until just recently.”

“Talk to me about that,” Doctor Cobb said writing something else down.

I squeezed my legs together again.

“Please, can’t I just go pee?” I asked.

“After we are finished,” he said. “Just talk to me about what is bothering you, and once you have talked for the minimum time, then I’ll let you go.”

“But I’m honestly going to wet my pants,” I warned him.

“Well, if you do, that’s no one’s fault but your own for not using the toilet when I warned you last time to use it before seeing me, and I gave you the thirty minutes we agreed on to go before calling you back.”

I sighed and pushed my knees hard into each other and turned to my side. “Well,” I thought a moment. “Girls seemed to get out of things sometimes because of ‘cramps’ that I still don’t understand. I have only been a girl for two days, you know.”

The doctor nodded, but aside from writing something else down, he didn’t respond to what I said. My legs were squeezing really tightly, and I felt the familiar prick-pin pressure tickling the end of my pee-tube trying to probe it open, I imagine.

“Well, girls seemed to get in less trouble for mistakes,” I went on a little more. “And girls don’t get punished as harshly.”

He just wrote things down as I came up with how it was easier to be a girl than a boy.

“When girls said that they needed or wanted something, the teachers seemed to believe them readily, but they always looked at us boys like we were lying.”

I felt a little pee finally get through the throbbing tense jittery muscles even as the wetness dampened the middle of my panties, I banged my legs harder, and closed my eyes trying to stop it.

“Robyn?” the doctor called through the ‘holding it static in my mind,’ “Go on, honey. What else do you think makes being a girl easier than being a boy?”

“I… I’m peeing my pants,” I panted trying to keep myself from leaking any more. Are you sure I can’t use the toilet."

“I already told you, if it happens, it happens. I’m not going to play the avoidance games with you anymore.”

“It’s not a game,” tears slid from my eyes. “I’m really peeing my pants.”

He looked down at my crotch, but shook his head. No doubt it wasn’t wet enough for him to see that I was telling the truth. I pushed my legs hard together and sat up pushing on my thighs with my hands.

“Honestly, I’m peeing my pants,” I said trying to get him to believe me.

“Then, you will leave the office in wet pants,” he shrugged. “I gave in last week, remember? And you promised not to wait like that again, and to go before you entered my office. And here we are again, so if you really are peeing your pants, then just do it.”

I looked at him with my mouth in a completely o-shaped surprise, my eyes wide, and pee starting to spray out into my panties again. I pushed and wiggled, but I couldn’t stop it. It came out and gushed around me and off of the seat. Tears spilled down the sides of my face. I shook as the pee continued to flood all over, and finally it began to taper off.

“Remember this,” Doctor Cobb said. “If you forget to use the toilet the next time, this is exactly what will happen.”

I looked down, sniffling, unable to continue talking.

“I think we are done for now. I don’t think you can talk in this condition, but next week, if you pee yourself to keep from talking, I’ll make you talk anyway, understand?”

I nodded.

I closed my eyes, my cheeks getting beat red, and I waited for mom to come in, take my hand, and she led me to the car. I could not stand to open my eyes at all, knowing that if I saw who saw me like this, I’d die, especially if it was someone I knew.

Eventually, I was sitting in the car, and I felt my eyes slowly open as we drove towards the house.

“Didn’t the doctor ask you to pee before you went into his office from now on?” she asked me.

I nodded gathering that the doctor must have told Robyn though it was a tough lesson to realize I’d be held accountable for even things I didn’t know anything about being said. Tears were still in my eyes, and it seemed that mom took pity on me, because her tone softened.

“Well, now you know that wetting your pants won’t get you out of talking to him, you will remember this in the future and go when we get to his office, right?”

I nodded.

“Good. We don’t need to talk about it anymore.”

She parked the car, and got out of the car, going into the house, apparently leaving me to decide when I wanted to get out of these wet pants I was in.

I walked into the living room with my head hung in shame. Uncle Jack looked over at me with a small smile, and then noticing my pants, he shook his head and pointed up the stairs. I didn’t need him to tell me to clean up. I was already uncomfortable with the pee sticking the material of my jeans to the backs of my thighs and making my butt all wet.

I went into my room, and started to strip those gross soaked jeans apart at the zipper flap, and then mom came in and she walked to my bed, sat down and motioned me over to her.

“Robyn, you are too old to sit there and hold it until the doctor wants to see you, and then complain because he wouldn’t let you use the toilet,” she said pulling my wet pants down my legs for me. “If this ever happens again, I’ll make you wear those wet pants out shopping, or maybe put you in diapers. Would you like that?”

I shook my head no.

“Good. Now, we are going to see the doctor again later this week because I’m sure you didn’t talk to him about what was bothering you yet. If you had finished talking to him, I’m sure the wetting would not have happened. It was a stunt to cut the time short, and if you do it again, you know what to expect.”

I nodded sadly.

“Good,” she slip my wet panties down my legs now, and pulled off my wet things. Then, she reached beside her and from a bucket of water, which I had not paid attention to her having, she pulled out a wash cloth and started to wipe my legs with it.

“You are fifteen years old, Robyn. Not a baby. You might have a little anxiety, depression, or some other problems, but you are not incapable of understanding consequences for your actions. You are quite upset by having peed your pants, aren’t you?”

I nodded.

“Good. So, next time?”

“I use the toilet while waiting to see him?” I asked shaking.

“Good.”

She then washed my privates and my butt which surprised me, and I gasped, though because she was mom, I felt too scared to push her hands away. It was a little uncomfortable to be cleaned up like a three year old in my bedroom instead of the bathroom.

She then pointed at me to stay right where I was, and she walked to my dresser. Obviously, she was going to dress me, too.

I stood there, and mom came back with a clean shirt, some panties, and a skirt. I just waited, and she lifted the shirt over my head, and off of my body. I hated the feeling of being dressed by her. Then she slipped up the clean panties on me, pulled the skirt on me, and then stood up with the bucket of water, and my wet clothes put in it.

“From now on, Robyn,” she said as she walked out my door. “If you are going to pee your pants like a three year old, every time you do it, I will clean you up, and if you seem to get used to that, I’ll let your Uncle Jack clean you up.”

I blushed.

After mom was finally out of the room, I laid on my bed and turned up the music to try to forget the trouble the last two days had been.

I don’t know how long I was there before I started to drift off again, but as I felt the familiar dark pin-light pull of dreamland pulling me under, I relaxed more and more, and soon I found myself back in my old bedroom.

I looked around the room, though I was sure that it was my old room because the furniture was the same, and because the blankets were nearly the same, I smelled a kind of perfume-like smell I first woke to when I came to my new home, and I noticed that for the most part, things had moved around my room.

I sat up, and looking down, I could see that I was still Robyn, but James was definitely missing, or anyway, the Robyn that played James was missing. Well, you get the idea. I stood up and walked over to my dresser and pulled the drawer out. All I saw were panties, under shirts for girls and bras in it, but I know the time before, I saw James get boxers from this very dresser. Was it somehow magic tapped so that it knew which of us was opening it? Why did I keep seeing girl’s things in it, but James could get boy’s things from it?

I sighed and walked to the bedroom door and peeked out at the landing. Out there, I saw my sister talking to James. James looked annoyed and Katie looked pleading. The more I looked at James, though, the less he acted anything like a friend to my sister. I wondered if indeed this Robyn that I had become was behind this little magic stunt at all, or if it was somehow, just a dream my confused head was spinning with.

I threw the door open and walked purposely towards them, but neither of them seemed to notice that I was there. He was now standing up full height, and he had his fist balled up at her. Was he going to hit her? I ran to put myself between them, but that’s when everything went blurry, and I started to fall back through the black pitch just before waking in bed.

“What the hell?” I looked around at Robyn’s room. One thing for sure, there was no way that this Robyn that I had become would be like that to my sister, so either what I had experienced was just a nightmare, or there was a lot more going on here, than a simple changing of places between two people! Something far more complex must be behind the mix up if I was really not dreaming, and was seeing what things were really like at my house now. I really hoped it wasn’t like that, for it would make it hell to return there, to gain my sister’s trust again, and to have them all understand that this was all some kind of mad mix up, and that it was not even me at home the last couple of days!

I kicked the blankets off of me, and got up out of the bed. I walked to my closet and taking off my clothes, I reached in and got a sleeping shirt that covered down to just past my hips. I walked onto the balcony and looked down at the living room where Uncle and mom were watching television.

I wasn’t sure if I was in trouble or not, but I decided to try to sneak down and see what would happen. I walked to the bottom of the steps without a sound, and into the living room sitting on the sofa furthest away from my mother who was also on it. Uncle was in a chair across the room, and they were watching Predator on the television.

I waited for commercial, and then I looked over at mom who looked back at me with a smile. So, I wasn’t really expected to stay up in the room anymore.

“Mom,” I said. “Something is wrong,” I whispered and shook.

“Yes honey?” asked standing up and walking towards me. “What is it?”

“I don’t know how to make you believe me,” I said in a low voice. “But I’m not really Robyn right now.”

“I believe you,” my mom said sadly. “You are just really mixed up and don’t understand where you are or what you are doing, right?” she asked.

I nodded. Still, I could see it in her face that she was humoring me, and that deep down, she thought I was Robyn struggling with some kind of identity crisis.

“Mom, until yesterday morning, I was a boy. I had a sister, who incidentally is really Robyn’s friend at school. Now, when I sleep at night, it seems I can see my sister, but the boy, the James who is with her, he is not treating her right. I’m scared for Katie.”

“Have you talked to Katie’s mother about your fears of her brother, and the way he’s treating her lately?” my mother seemed to hear only what she wanted to hear.

“No. You don’t understand. I haven’t been to Katie’s house at all in the real physical sense of being awake. I can only dream being there. I’m stuck in this body, and the James that is at her house, is not James, and he’s being mean to her!”

Uncle Jack looked over at me. He seemed to be thinking deeply as his eyes seemed to unfocus on me, and he put a thoughtful hand to his chin catching it in the ‘v’ between his thumb and forefinger. He seemed to consider everything I said.

I shook as I sat there on the sofa wondering what they were thinking. I could almost picture the mother still thinking I had to see Dr. Cobb because I had not finished speaking with him a few hours ago due to peeing my pants. I shuddered at that. I had never peed my pants in all my life.

“Well,” Uncle Jack broke into my thoughts “Are you willing to tell us what the last two days have been like or shall we take you to see Doctor Cobb tomorrow?”

I shook my head. “I’m not going to tell that quack anything. I’m trying to tell you both what is going on with me. Please listen to me instead of that man for once.”

I was nearly in tears.

“We’re listening, Robyn. Go ahead. Tell us everything.”

“I woke up yesterday in this strange family, in this strange life, and I’ve been trying to cope with it all. I have no idea what it is like to be a girl, and I’ve been blundering my way through it all. I even got myself so confused in trying to get along with everything, I peed my pants for the first time in my entire life at the doctor’s yesterday. Surely, you don’t think that a teenaged girl or boy my age would just do that, do you?”

Uncle looked at me intently. Mom sighed and shook her head. I wasn’t sure if they were following me or not. It was a crazy idea that I wasn’t Robyn for them. Until yesterday, I would never have believed this kind of thing could happen. I had no scientific explanation for any of this, if it was real, and since I couldn’t seem to wake myself, I figured it couldn’t be a dream by now.

I walked over to my mom’s lap, and I sat down on it and looked into her stunned face.

“Mom, I couldn’t even remember how to put on makeup yesterday or fix my own hair. Uncle Jack will tell you! He made me wash the junk off of my face before taking me to school.”

He nodded and confirmed that at least that was true.

“Do you really think a teenager could forget out to put on makeup if she had been doing it for a year or more herself? When I go to the bathrooms at school, I’m confused about whether I should use the boy ones or the girl ones. And I’m repeated classes I took about two years ago!”

Mom sighed.

“Robyn, I don’t know what to think,” she said. “Tell you what, we won’t take you to see Doctor Cobb this week, but you need to try to be a little more your age, okay? If I see you doing things you should be doing by yourself, then we’ll think about whether it is necessary to see this doctor or not.”

“Mom,” I whined. “It’s not about seeing the doctor or not. There is something going on, and if we don’t figure it out soon, I’m afraid something bad is going to happen to my sister!”

“Would you feel better if we at least took you to see your friend and to see how she was being treated?” Uncle Jack suddenly asked.

I nodded.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter Six
Uncle Jack walked over and sat down where I had been, patted his lap, and looked at me a little strangely. I wasn’t sure about what he was insinuating wanting me to do, but mom was already pushing me off of her lap and going to get the phone.

I stood up and walked over to Uncle Jack.

“Are you too big to sit on my lap, now, honey?” he asked me.

I nodded.

He smiled and patted the sofa between us. “Sit here, then, honey.”

I looked into his eyes for a moment, and then he gave me a sudden side-squeeze hug.

“I believe you,” he whispered to me. “I believe you honestly think you were a boy, and since I don’t understand how the mind works, I could even believe that physically it is possible that you really did change bodies. But let’s explore that change, okay?”

I looked up at him, wondering what game he was playing.

“Robyn,” he seemed to look serious. “I’m not playing. The main reason we’ve been sending you to this ‘quack’ as you put it, is that you’ve been distant with your mother for the last two years, and I could see subtle changes happening.”

“So?” I looked up at him. “Does this mean that Robyn has had other episodes in changing bodies with other people?”

“That’s a possibility. What I would like to know, though, is if you really wanted to change roles and become a girl, or if you were more happy being a boy, and what your feelings are now, that you have had two days to see things for yourself.”

“Um… so you are asking if I had ever wanted to be a girl?”

“That’s the first question, yeah.”

“I guess, sometimes, I wondered what it was like, but deep down, no, I really didn’t want to try it. I was glad to stay a boy and never know what a girl gets to have or not.”

“I see. And now, you are coming to terms that being a girl is harder work than you have ever thought it would be, right?”

I nodded.

“Well, to be fair, you haven’t really given being a girl a fair chance,” he said suddenly. “If what you say is true, you have only been a girl for two days, and instead of focusing on being a girl, you’ve been focused on how different everything has been for you. You really don’t know any more about being a girl than you did when you first woke up yesterday.”

I paused a moment to think about his words. Then I looked hard at him. Did he really believe I wasn’t Robyn? Was he saying this just to please Robyn, or did he know what was really going on with all this? I shook my head, because if he knew about everything, he had certainly played his part cool earlier the day before, when I tried to ask about changing bodies.

“Look Robyn,” he said trying to get my attention. “I don’t know what is happening with you, or how you could really be someone else in Robyn’s body, but what I do know, is that you are stuck as Robyn right now, so even though we can physically check on your school friends for you, there is no way we can reverse whatever it is you believe has happened to you at the moment, so my advice, is for you to get used to being who you are at least for now.”

I nodded. That did make a little sense.

“Good,” he said. “As far as changing bodies with other people, you know that’s scientifically impossible and at best, the horror stories of science fiction or fantasy, don’t you?”

I nodded.

“Well, assuming it is impossible to change bodies with someone else, do you think that maybe because of your mental condition, maybe you just got enough information about Katie, that you started to think you were her brother or something?”

I shrugged my shoulders. I distinctly remember wearing boxers before, and I certainly remembered the difference in being two years older or so, and also about how it seemed harder to hold my pee than it had been before. There were certain things that were just too real, and yet, I could see why the uncle would think what he was saying too.

“Uncle Jack, what if I was a little crazy, and I really believe I’m these other people? Does that mean I should be locked up in a crazy house and maybe studied more?”

He shook his head. “The doctor had already diagnosed you with MPD, a condition where people think they have different people in their bodies at different times. As long as these other lives do not control your real life, and who people see you as, I see no reason for you to be locked up.”

I nodded.

“Now, about peeing your pants at the doctor’s office. You do know that you were asked to go before the visit the next time you went to him, don’t you?”

“I know that now,” I mumbled softly.

“Then you will use the toilet from now on before you into his office, right?”

I nodded.

“Good. So, you wanted to know what it might be like for a girl to try to take over a boy’s body?” he sudden reopened our conversation from the day before.

I nodded again.

“Well, there are a lot of things that a girl would find difficult about being a boy as well as a boy would find being difficult about being a girl. First of all, since girls are allowed to show their feelings easier, she would have a difficult time fitting in with normal boys.”

“How so?”

“Well, she would more likely tell you when she was scared even if it was just the nervous kind of scared, and she would be more likely react to fear before figuring out what was really behind the fear. That would make a lot of boys laugh at her.”

I looked at him a little strangely. I felt fear sometimes, and I even reacted to it. Could a girl really be more sensitive than that?

“The hardest thing for a girl, I think, would be to have sudden male hormones in her body and stick to play with, and well, maybe I should just stop there.”

I looked down at my pants. I knew what he meant by stick, but by his breaking off, it seemed he didn’t think I caught on, and he was now trying to avoid talking about what he meant by ‘stick’.

“So, even though I believe you girls have some difficulties that are inherent to being born with the bodies you have, I also believe there are things that girls would find very difficult in being a boy as well.”

I sighed.

“Robyn, you know if you ask your mom these questions, she might get the wrong idea, don’t you? You might even scare her.”

I nodded. “That’s why I was asking you,” I lied.

“Well, let’s not talk about what we talked about with your mom, okay?”

I nodded.

A few minutes later, mom came back into the living room, and she handed me the phone.

“I’ve talked to Katie’s mother,” she said. “And now, I’ll let you talk with Katie.”

I took the phone nodding, and called into it. “Katie?” I timidly called into the phone. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said sounding happy. “What made you think I wasn’t?”

“Katie,” I said in a rush. “Is James being mean to you lately?”

“No,” she said quietly. Then she said it again a little stronger. “NO!” Then finally, she said “No,” so strongly, I knew she was hiding something, and then she started to cry into the phone.

“Can you talk to me about it?” I asked her.

“Not here. Tomorrow at school, if we are alone, I’ll talk to you about it.”

I felt a little more jittery at her answer, and mom saw a look on my face that made her grab the phone. “Can you put your mom back on?” I heard this mom ask.

Mom put the phone down and sighed. Apparently, Katie had hung up on her. Whatever it was that was bothering her, and I feeling that the new James was at the base of the problem, I was not relieved of my fears. Thankfully the mom that was watching me, didn’t try to tell me that it was nothing, but rather, seemed concerned too.

“Now, I understand,” she said. “You’ve been distant, and a little into the role of being Katie’s big brother because you are worried about her. I’d call social services, but I don’t think that will solve anything in this case.”

I was relieved that she said she wouldn’t call social services because it was no use, but with my fears somewhat confirmed, I wanted to get to sleep earlier, hoping I’d get into the my own life, if only as a spirit girl, and maybe I could find a way to intervene if he was going to hurt her on this night.

“Good night, mom,” I said getting up from the sofa.

“Robyn, you haven’t eaten dinner yet.”

“I don’t care. I’m tired,” I said. I ran up the steps, and no one seemed to chase me. I was glad to close my door and I walked to the mirror at my dresser. Inside it, I could see the other James. He was not with Katie at the moment, so maybe she was okay for now. I watched him, wondering what he was doing.

He sat down on the bed and looked around at the room at large. It was like he was looking for something invisible, and I felt a chill run down my back. There was something in the way he looked right in my direction though there was no mirror in that room, and therefore, as far as I knew, no way for him to see me watching him, but he was staring right into my eyes now.

“You better leave Katie alone,” I said through the mirror at him. “If I find you’ve done anything to her, I’ll hunt you down and find you, and I’ll kill you. She’s my sister!”

The James in the mirror looked around again, and then laid back in his bed. He had something in his left hand that was balled up and hidden, but small parts of cloth were barely visible beyond the bottom of his fist and around the closed knuckles of his fingers. What was he holding in his hand so tightly?

His eyes began to drift closed, and I sighed in relief. I walked to my bed, and pulled the blankets back. I settled into the pink sheets, and after turning out the light, I fell asleep as well.

The familiar drawing of darkness seemed to pull me, now, not to my own room in my own familiar life, but into a different direction. When I woke up, I was in another girl’s room. I was in a room with very humble furnishings, only a rickety old bed that barely supported the weight of the teenaged girl sleeping there, and a dresser that was better functioning as a large box. The drawers were taped into the frame, and the top had been modified to come off.

I walked away from the curious contraption, and stared at the sleeping girl that was snoring lightly in her sleep. Something about her was familiar, but I had never seen this black girl in my life. Her hair was rather dirty looking, and there was a light bruise on her cheek from being slapped, most likely. I felt sorry for her.

I crept out of the bedroom she was in, but the rest of the house didn’t seem to fit her room at all. The balcony over which her room was at the end of, there was a grand receiving hall with all manner of rich furniture.

I wandered down the stairs and into the dining room, and never had I seen such fragile expensive china or decorations everywhere. Certainly someone rich must have lived here. So why was the girl upstairs sleeping, in such a poor room with a bed about to fall apart and a dresser that wasn’t fit for even play furniture in a playhouse?

I crept back up the steps and into the room. I didn’t know what I should call the girl that lived here, but there was only one reason I could think that I might dream of this place. I was most likely in another of the people’s homes that was affected, and since I couldn’t imagine having any connection to anyone else, I came to the conclusion that this girl must be Robyn, the Robyn’s whose place I was taking.

“Robyn?” I called to her sleeping form.

She seemed to mumble a reply, but stayed asleep.

“I’m the Robyn in your real house,” I told her. “I woke up two days ago in your house. You know my sister Kate, and I would like to know, do you know how you ended up in this life you are now trying to figure out?” I asked her.

She mumbled, but still, I didn’t understand her.

I had to know if she had any idea how she got here, I also wanted to know more about her MPD problems so I could deal with her life more easily. So far, the voices in one’s head with MPD was not affecting me. Maybe she toted those along with her.

I watched her kick and squirm in her sleep, and I thought I felt her breath catch as she turned into a certain position on her left side. I pulled back the blankets, and I saw bruises on her legs and a fresh red mark on her left side that seemed to be not only rather large for a hand, but also rather painful. She had been beaten, for sure. But why?

I waited for her to wake up, sitting on the floor. Somehow, I was able to stay awake all night and watch her, and eventually, she started to stir from sleep as her eyes fluttered open.

She looked right at me, and for a moment or two, she just waited for me to speak.

“Can you see me?” I asked rather lamely not knowing what else to ask.

“Yeah.”

“Is your name Robyn?”

“It was,” she nodded. “Now they call me Olivia.”

“I think I’ve taken your place in our switching. Do you know how you got here?”

“No, not at all, but I woke up two days ago in this bed, and my nightmare started.”

“I know how you feel.”

“How could you? At least my parents treat you decently, and you have a comfortable life,” she replied “Here, I’m an overworked servant that they beat whenever they feel like it, and then put away in this room like it’s still the 1800s or something.”

“I see,” I said frowning. “Well, I guess there are some things that could have been worse for me, but the worst of it, for me, is that I’m a boy in a girl’s body! I don’t even know how to be a girl.”

“You’re what?” the other Robyn jumped up from her bed, I could now see that she had a pull up on and a shirt that didn’t seem anywhere long enough to hide it, both dingy and stained the tar out of. “What have you been doing to my body while you are using it?” she asked looking really upset by this news. Maybe I should not have said that part aloud.

“I haven’t done anything with the body except clean it and try to understand it.”

“I don’t want you to understand it! It’s MY body, and I’m going to get it back, eventually, and it better not be pregnant!”

“It won’t be,” I ducked behind my arms trying to predict what she might throw at me."

“Then, why did you come and find me, if not to torment me about what you can do to me, or if not to tell me how to get back to my own life?”

“Actually, I was hoping you might know something that would help me,” I said slowly lowering my hands, but ready to raise them again in case she took the moment of weakness to strike. “And if you can’t, then maybe you can at least tell me how to understand your mother when she gives me hints that don’t work on boys.”

That Robyn shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t understand what you mean,” she said.

“Alright, fine, but if you find something, and if you can get back to your room, you’ll tell me so we can figure out how to get back to our own lives together, right?”

She nodded.

I then decided that I needed to get back before Robyn’s mom tried to wake me, and then before I even though it, I found myself falling back through the zone and into my own bed, my eyes fluttering open in the dark room. I looked around, and knew it was still a little early, and that no one had come to wake me yet.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter 7

Robyn wasn’t behind this mix up, there were more people involved, and now, my sister was in danger of some psycho-abuser in our home, and what was worse, I was still a girl with the mind of a boy! Could things get any harder than this? I saw the door start to open, and then the familiar image of the mother figure at the door.

“I’m awake,” I called to her. I still had yet to figure out Uncle Jack.

Getting out of bed, I kicked the blankets away, and walked to the dresser and peered into the mirror getting a look at the empty room where I should have been sleeping. The boy in the bed, was snoring happily, or so it looked by the smile on his face. I pulled off my long shirt and rummaged through the drawer for a bra.

“You are going to disappear,” I told that boy in the other room. “You are going to come up missing somehow, until I figure out how to get out of this situation and back at my sister’s side.”

I pulled on an undershirt.

“Today, I’m going to find out everything you’ve been doing to my sister, and then I’m going to get you arrested or something!”

I pulled off the panties from the day before and pulled on some clean panties which were pink with red hearts all over them. Then I dressed myself in a black shirt a black pair of jeans before I made my way towards the bathroom. It was open this time, and I easily sat down and did what I needed before remembering to wipe this time, stood up and started to walk out when I heard mom calling me down.

“If you want to ride the bus today,” she called to me. “You need to come down now!”

“I’m coming,” I came running down the stairs.

Before I knew it, I was on the bus, about four seats from the front, riding to school. The bus slowly filled with others, and in time, a cute boy sat next to me on pretext that there were no other open seats. I didn’t buy it, but hey, I did have to acknowledge that Robyn was cute, and if I was myself, I might even try to get her to notice me.

“We’re in the same class,” the boy started trying to play it cool.

“Yeah, algebra, right?” I poked a guess not really sure where I had seen him before.

“Yeah, first period. So… um… my name is Oliver. Your name is Robyn, right?”

“Yeah, I guess,” I said.

“Well, I was thinking, tomorrow is Friday. Would you like to ask your folks, and then maybe come and get some ice cream with me or something?”

That sounded like one of the lamest ways to ask for a date I’ve yet heard of, yet it was so much more than what I could do. Maybe asking lamely like that did work, for some girls. What the scoot? I wasn’t myself, and there is a possibility that Robyn could even like this kid. He wasn’t a dog to look at, or at least I hoped he wasn’t. I wasn’t very good at judging men for their looks since I fancied girls more.

“I’ll ask my mom,” I said. “Can I tell you the answer tomorrow at school or maybe on the bus ride?”

“Sure,” Oliver smiled a light blush coming to his face.

“So, um…, what do you do in you free time?” I asked to make conversation.

“Oh, nothing that girls really like to do,” he said looking down at his lap. “I just play Dungeons and Dragons with a small group of friends when I don’t have anything better to do.”

“Dungeons and Dragons?” I tried to pretend to not know what that was since I was supposed to be a girl. I also believed that girls hated games like that.

“Yeah, it’s a fantasy role playing game, where we pretend to beat up on monsters and stuff and collect interesting treasures.”

I rolled my eyes thinking that was a lame way to describe it. Were these lame conversations really enough to get a girl talking, for real? I thought that surely I could come up with better opening lines with my eyes closed than what this guy was trying to hit on me with at the moment.

“What kind of movies do you like?” I decided to lead the conversation into more common grounds where both boys and girls should be interested in talking, as far as I knew girls, anyway.

“Well, I don’t really watch movies anymore,” the boy said. “Most of them have the same plots over and over, and I’m starting to find them boring lately.”

“Oh?” I asked wondering now, what his idea of a date would mean, when it came to that. Then I realized, wait, I really couldn’t date this guy. Sure, the body I was currently residing in was a girl’s, but well, it was still way too weird. I don’t like guys. Well, maybe I could make an excuse up tomorrow, maybe tell him my mom wants me to see a doctor. That wouldn’t be a lie if I told mom I’d talk to the shrink tomorrow. I knew that she wanted me to talk to him anyway.

The bus arrived, and I went to find Katie in the cafeteria. She had a black eye and she was limping. I ran up to her, and helping her to a table, I sat down. I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear how this had happened to her, but I knew I had to. I was sure it had to do with the person that called himself James at the moment.

“Yeah,” she said before I could even ask. “James did this,” she said. “He said that I always get on his nerves, make him take care of me, and then when he tells me to do something, I refuse and pretend to hate him. He got mad because I didn’t clean something up for him.”

“That’s not James,” I told with tears in my eyes.

“I know,” she said. “James has never hit me before. I almost feel scared of him now. He has changed so much in the last couple of days. I don’t want to go home today right after school. Can I spend some time at your house until my parents get home?”

“Yeah,” I nodded. Anger boiled up inside of me. How could someone do this to Katie. She was so nice, and she never hurt anyone! Sure, she could be a little selfish at times, and not be fair when I wanted her to do something after I just did something for her, but that was what kid sisters do!

“Thanks,” she said tears falling down her face. She stood up, and I noticed how hard it was for her to walk. I went right to her, and helped her, leaning her on my shoulder.

“Thanks,” she said again.

“You need to see the nurse,” I told her. “Surely mom and dad saw you limping,” I said. “How did you hide this from them?”

“I told them I got hurt in PE yesterday, and that I was checked, and that I’m fine, just a little sore.”

“What are you going to tell the school staff then?”

“If they ask, I’ll tell them I fell or something.”

“Look at me, Katie. That boy in your house really is NOT James.”

“How do you know?” she asked. “He looks like James to me.”

“I’m James,” I told her. “I don’t know how it has happened, but I’m stuck in this strange body, completely trying to figure out how to be a girl until such time I can find out how to reverse this, and your friend, Robyn is currently in a completely different situation.”

“Robyn, you are so imaginative!”

I sighed. Why didn’t anyone believe me? My own sister is attacked by someone in my body, and she seems to act as though that’s natural? I’ve never laid a hand on her. Why can’t she see that it couldn’t be me? “Look, Katie,” I said to her. “I want you to avoid James for a while. I don’t want you to so much as come to him for a drink of water for a while.”

“And I should listen to you because….”

“Because I’m worried about you,” I said. “I’m your friend, aren’t I?”

Katie nodded.

“Then promise me you’ll avoid him for a while. I don’t want to see you get hurt again like this.”

She was limping pretty bad, and it took a while to get her to the nurse. Finally, though, we made it. I dropped her off, got a pass for my first class, and then walked down the hall to algebra.

“So, you did decide to join us for class today,” Mrs. Haile said looking rather strict as usual.

I showed her the pass, and she nodded and gestured at my seat. “Well, since you missed the checking of the homework, you’ll have to spend your own time grading your own paper before giving it to me,” she said. “You can do it in the next three school days, so just let me know so I’ll be here when you do it. After that, it will be as if you didn’t turn it in.”

“Witch,” I muttered as I sat down. Actually what I wanted to say, I was a little worried that I could get kicked out of school for if someone heard me, and not knowing how Robyn’s real character was like, I didn’t think it was fair to get her in anymore trouble that I was causing her anyway by not knowing how to be a girl.

Right after third period PE, this time, knowing that the nurse’s office was open to me, and not wanting any trouble today with Mr. Hastings, I went to the nurse.

“Excuse me,” I called to the nurse. “Can I…?” I didn’t really want anyone in there to know how nervous I was of the regular bathrooms. It was awkward enough that the nurse had to know.

“Go on, Robyn. Come to me when you are done, and I’ll give you a pass.”

Luckily, no one else seemed to care what I came in there for, and I made my way back to the bathroom to take care of myself. It was relieving to know I would be able to go to English today without having eyes darting my way because I was desperate once again.

A few minutes later, I was in front of Mr. Hastings handing him the nurse’s pass. I was only a couple of seconds late, but in that class, even one second could get you sent to detention. I was glad of the note.

“Sit,” he told me. He had already been at the front of the room ready to start today’s lecture. Though he looked displeased at my interruption, I took solace in that he couldn’t do anything about it, well, not legally anyway. I sat comfortably and put on a smile as I listened to him begin the class.

Twenty minutes into the class, I heard squeaking and rocking in the class. I looked around trying to identify who it was, but it seemed every time I started to look around, the noise stopped. That meant someone else had to use the bathroom, and though not sure how bad it was, I was beginning to think it must be a girl. I don’t know exactly why I thought it was a girl, but that’s what I started to narrow my search to, when I heard the noise.

“Ms. Barret, come to my desk,” Mr. Hastings said about twenty minutes before the class was over.

I stood up and started to walk towards his desk, but then the noise occurred again. He saw me walking normally, and with normal strides, so that when I got there, he was a little red.

“Sorry, Robyn,” he whispered. “I made a mistake. You may go sit back down.”

I smiled and walked back to my seat nearly laughing at him. He had heard the squeaking and thought automatically it must have been me. But from that moment, I could see that he was studying the other students intently trying to figure out who was making the sounds. I had stopped looking for fear that if I found her, I might give her away, and the teacher would be mean to her.

When I went to lunch, I saw that Katie was notably absent, and so I went to the office to see if I could find out what was going on. Well, being another student, they were quite reluctant to tell me anything, but I wasn’t about to just give up.

The office assistant’s attention was distracted when the principal’s door opened, and I quickly looked over the secretary’s desk. I thought it would be a shot in the dark, but still worth a look, and luckily, I had seen it before it was put in her records. There was a paper that indicated that her parents had been called, and that she had been hurt, maybe at school.

Katie was really good at this lying thing, I had to admit. I hoped that it wasn’t a practiced gift of hers, and that she had been lying to our parents about a lot of stuff. Well, if she was, was it any of my business? Yes, it was! I am her older brother, and if I don’t know what’s going on, how can I protect her? Once I get back in my body, I’m going to have to figure out what she’s all lied about.

Having had my only friend sent home on me, I felt lonely as I went back to the lunch room to get something to eat. Most of everyone else seemed to avoid me at the moment, and I could see some people pointing and staring at me. I didn’t care to hear what they were talking about. I just felt alone. I wondered if Robyn felt this alone.

At the end of the day, I got on the bus again, and rode it home, forgetting to use the bathroom on the way home. Well, I had never used it more than once a day at school before, I had actually used it before the worst class of the day, so I wasn’t worried when I stepped onto the bus. It wasn’t like I was going to the shrink’s office again, and would feel like I had to wait hours again.

Upon coming through the front door, however, I found that Katie was in my living room watching television. Apparently, she had come with some excuse for her parents to drop her at my place instead of at her own house.

I smiled when I saw her, and she smiled back. Robyn’s parents were being discreet or something because I had no idea where Uncle Jack was, and mom would be heard still puttering around in the kitchen.

“Can you come up to my room?” I asked before my eyes found her leg in a white cast. I looked down. “Sorry.”

“It’s no big deal,” Katie said. “But yeah, mom and dad are pretty mad at James at the moment. They forced me to tell the truth since the school couldn’t figure out how I got hurt there, and now, he’s in big trouble.”

Mom must have heard us mention it, because she came in just a few seconds after with a plate of cookies.

“They asked us to let Katie spend a couple of days with us while they sort out their son,” Mom told us. “Meanwhile, it can’t be all that bad to have to share a house with your best friend, but since she can’t walk very well, she’s going to sleep down here in the living room.”

“What about the bathroom?” I asked mom.

“Oh, dear, I didn’t think of that. Our only bathroom is up there,” she pointed at the balcony at the end where we could see the door up and out of Katie’s reach."

“I can get up there,” she said looking around at us.

“No, you can’t,” mom said. “The doctor told your mother very clearly that you are not to be on your feet at all.”

“Then what am I going to do?” Katie asked.

“I’ll call your mom and ask her,” mom said as she grabbed the phone.

I sighed and sat down next to Katie. “Are you okay?”

She sighed. “I was, until I figured out that the bathroom might be out of reach. I don’t know what I’m going to do if I can’t use it.”

“Well, mom will think of something,” I whispered to her. “Don’t worry about it right now, okay?”

I had no idea how long she had already gone without a bathroom break, and I figured if she had not noticed before I came in, maybe she was okay for a little longer.

“But I have to go, now,” she whined.

“Oh,” I blushed trying to think about how to help her. “Well, you aren’t supposed to stand up or walk,” I said thinking.

“I know,” she said sounding frustrated by the obvious.

Uncle Jack came through the door and saw Katie looking nervous and tearful. He also saw me shaking as I was looking around at what to do.

“What’s wrong?” he asked us both, but we both just blushed not knowing what to say. He took only a moment longer to see Katie’s leg, her fidgeting, and the look on her face, and then he brightened. “Got it,” he said walking straight over to her.

“Katie,” he said gently. “Do you trust me?”

She looked up at him for a minute, at me, and then back to him and slowly nodded her head.

He picked her up, carefully, and started to carry her up the steps. Mom came out of the kitchen just as they got to the bottom of the steps.

“Jack, what are you doing with her?”

“She’s pretty embarrassed to say it, but she has to use the toilet,” he stated matter of fact. “If I don’t take her up those stairs, she’s going to have a very embarrassing situation in our living room.”

Mom nodded and he started to slowly climb the stairs so that he didn’t fall, and so that he could get her safely to the bathroom. I just watched from where I was, knowing how awkward it must be to have someone else’s uncle take you to the bathroom, especially if you are a girl.

“Robyn,” mom sat down next to me. “Your friend cannot get up at all. You’ll need to sleep down here with her tonight, and if she has to use the bathroom in the night, you come and get Uncle Jack, understand? Her mom has given consent for him to help her for now.”

I nodded.

A few minutes later, Jack carried Katie out of the bathroom, apparently, he had stayed in there the whole time she used it, and I wasn’t really looking forward to sharing that awkward experience with Katie. I knew Uncle Jack a little better than she did by now, and not even I would be comfortable with him in there watching me, especially in my current form.

Once Katie was put on the sofa next to me again, mom went back to the kitchen, and Uncle Jack went off as if he had something better to do in his room. It was obvious they were trying to give us the same space we would have if we were in my room.

“He was really nice about it, and didn’t get mad at all, even though it was hard to start because of a strange man, oh sorry, I know he’s your uncle…,” Katie was talking about this as if it were natural to share with Robyn.

“Don’t worry about it,” I said. “I would feel a little weird if your dad took me to the bathroom, too.”

“Anyway, he was really patient, and he did his best not to look too much at me until I had my panties in place. Then he watched what he was doing so he didn’t hurt me or touch me in awkward places while he helped pull my jeans up for me.”

I smiled.

“So, I heard that the class nerd asked you out while you were on the bus.”

“How did you hear about that? You weren’t in any classes today,” I said blushing.

“Well, are you going to go out with him?”

“I don’t know,” I said. “Anyway, I think mom wants to take me to see the doctor tomorrow. I am supposed to go back because something happened the last time I was there, so he didn’t finish our appointment earlier this week.”

“You see the doctor so much,” Katie said. “You are sure you are not really sick or dying, right?”

“It’s not that kind of doctor,” I sighed. If Robyn and my sister were such good friends, it was time Robyn told my sister what kind of doctor it was. “They think I have stress issues in this family, so they take me to see a shrink sometimes.”

“Stress issues?” Katie asked. “I’m sorry. Is the doctor any good?”

That was a fair question, but one that I really had no answer for. I had not seen him but only once, and for only a part of a visit. I sighed trying to think of what to say. “He’s strict,” I told her. “He doesn’t like it when you try to avoid talking to him, so he made a really strict rule with me, and he enforced it the last time I saw him. I pushed it, so we had to end the session early, but mom wasn’t happy about that.”

“Sounds like he and Mr. Hastings or Mrs. Hail should meet,” Katie said which made us both giggle.

A few hours later, we had been watching television when my bladder told me to go pee, and while I was in there, I pulled down my pants to discover that my panties were damp. How did that happen? I don’t remember really holding it. I sat on the toilet, just as there was a knock on the door.

“Are you in there, Robyn,” Uncle Jack’s voice came through the door.

“Yeah?”

“Well, hurry. Katie needs the toilet again.”

I shook my head. Why did Katie pee so often? I went as fast as I could, stood up after wiping, and then looking in my panties, I shrugged thinking the wet area wasn’t that bad. They did feel a little clammy on my butt though and I walked out of the bathroom.

Uncle Jack brought Katie in, and leaving the door open, he gently set her on the floor, keeping her broken leg off of the ground through some juggling act, and he waited while she undid her pants herself. I had seen enough and sheepishly went back downstairs.

I sat on the couch, once again, the back of my panties reminding me how wet they were when I did. Why was I so wet? I had not been holding it, not as far as I knew, I hadn’t. I just went up to the bathroom when I felt like going, but my panties really felt clammy and cool all around my bum and around my privates.

Uncle Jack took Katie back down the stairs and sat her next to me a few minute later, and then he whispered to me. “Robyn, come upstairs. I need to talk to you.”

I got up, and walked up the stairs. He was watching Katie but whispered to me so lightly I could hardly hear him. “You need to change your pants.”

I looked down at the crotch of my jeans, but they looked dry. He shook his head and took my left arm and forced it across the back of my butt. “Now do you get it?” he asked.

I looked up at him in surprise. “I didn’t know I went that badly,” I said fearing I was in trouble.

“Obviously, or you would have changed,” he said. “I don’t know how you managed to pee your pants like that, but I don’t care. I just don’t want you making a fool of yourself, sitting in wet pants in front of your friend. She’s the one with a broken leg and so an excuse to have peed herself, alright?”

I nodded and feeling tears in my eyes, walked into the bedroom to look for something comfortable to wear. I looked into the dim room that used to be mine through the mirror, and yelled at that creep that was in there though I knew he probably couldn’t hear me.

“You did this! I know it! I don’t know what you are getting even with me or my sister for, but I’m going to find out, and when I do, I’m going to do even worse than you think one of us did to you!”

The noise brought my mom up the stairs in a hurry. She was at my door just as I was finishing yelling, and I blushed. She had heard something.

“Robyn, are you yelling at one of your MPD people again?”

I nodded not knowing how else I could answer that.

“Uncle Jack told me you peed your pants, and were pretty surprised by that. I’m guessing that was your… Lucy’s fault again?”

I looked up at her a little confused for a moment.

“You know, the Lucy that lives inside you and wets her pants when she gets nervous,” mom asked a little shaken by the confused look I gave her.

“Oh, yeah, I guess so,” I said. “Lucy didn’t say anything, but she’s been hiding lately, so maybe she caused it.”

“Then we really need to get you to see Doctor Cobb again so he can try to talk to that part of you again, don’t you think? Lucy might be hiding something that is key to your recent behavior.”

I nodded. “Tomorrow?”

“Is it alright if we go tomorrow?”

I nodded.

“I’m sorry, but I had to explain to Katie about you peeing your pants when you get too nervous about something. She saw your wet pants when your Uncle called you upstairs.”

“It’s okay,” I blushed. “She probably knew something was going on anyway.”

Mom actually stayed and started to undress me like I was a toddler. I didn’t know why, but it made me feel good to let her do it. I know, that if I were myself, I’d be furious! Why did it feel so good to let her unzip my shorts and to pull my pants down like this? She pulled off of my pants as I lifted my legs, as if I was an obedient toddler getting my pants changed because I had a natural accident.

“Mom,” I looked up at her. “Don’t you get tired of it when Lucy does this to me?” I asked.

Mom looked at me with a small smile. “Sometimes, honey, but I also know it’s not your fault, and in a way, it’s not Lucy’s fault either. If that part of your brain is so immature, she just doesn’t understand how to deal with stress and to get to the potty at the same time. That’s all I understand about it, and all I really care about, other than that she might make it difficult for you to have a regular life if she doesn’t learn to grow up a little bit. That’s why you are seeing Doctor Cobb.”

I looked down. “I don’t even remember holding it that long, and I don’t know what Lucy is worried about at all. I had a good day at school today.”

“Robyn,” mom had wiped me with a wet cloth and was now pulling up some panties on me. “You were stressed out because your best friend’s brother had been beating on her. You knew it was happening, and you felt helpless. Even though you were glad she was safely at our house, Lucy just didn’t know how to deal with the fact that Katie couldn’t go potty by herself, and so she got distracted or something.”

“Mom, how come you know so much about the personalities in my head?” I asked. “I don’t understand them at all.”

“I had the same condition at around your age,” she said blushing now. “Yes, I had even peed my pants once or twice because of something one of the people inside had felt, but over time, and with therapy and medicine, I’ve been able to suppress those little people in my head.”

I looked down. “So one day, all those people might disappear?”

“That’s right,” mom said. “But everyone is different, and in some cases, they stay all your life, but you can control them better and better through therapy and medicine and given lots of time.”

She finished by pulling a skirt on me, and then gathered up my dirty clothes. “I’ve told Katie that you were just so worried about her, that one of the little parts of you got scared and made you wet yourself, so I don’t think she’s going to laugh at you. Do you want to stay up here, or go down and talk to her?”

“I’ll go downstairs. It’s rude for me to stay up here, and anyway, if she’s not my friend anymore, it’s better to find out sooner than later.”

I walked down the stairs, hesitantly, taking as much time as I could, fearing that Katie would hate Robyn for peeing her pants in front of her. I got near the sofa, and noticed that Katie had been put in Uncle’s favorite chair, and the sofa looked wetter than before.

“Your uncle put some stuff on the sofa, and moved me over here,” Katie said from across the room. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about Lucy,” she said.

“Lucy?” I tried to play dumb.

“Yeah, your mom said that’s the little girl that you become when you get too nervous, and the part of you that pees your pants when you have too much on your mind.”

I nodded.

“So, anyway, I won’t tell anyone about Lucy, okay? Just don’t tell on my brother. I don’t know what’s going on with him, but I’m worried about him, kind of like you were worried about me.”

I nodded.

“So, do you want to watch television?” Katie asked trying to change the topic now.

I nodded.

Seeing that I was still greatly embarrassed because I could only nod at the moment, Katie did something surprising. She made the come here gesture at me, like you do to small children, and she smiled. “Come on,” she said talking slowly and friendly-like with an adorable smile on her face.

I was James, damn it! She couldn’t direct me towards her like I was seven or something, but the funny thing, the frustrating thing, the hardest to understand was, is that I actually moved towards her, and I felt a smile form on my face as I approached her.

I tried to clear the smile from my face, but I still ended up in the seat with her, and she put an arm around me.

“Robyn, you’ve always taken care of me, when my brother wasn’t around, and bullies were picking on me. You’ve always been my best friend from kindergarten, and I want you to know, that Lucy is safe with me. I’ll baby her when she gets scared, just like this.”

Katie then hugged me closer, and somehow, something inside me felt calmer, and a giddiness surfaced that caused me to light up. We watched cartoons together for a bit instead of something more… teen-like. Somehow, it made me feel so good inside to watch My Little Pony for the first time in years!

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter 8[/b]

I remember a time, when the situation was just reversed. Katie was maybe eleven or twelve years old, and she had just come in the house, her jeans soaked in piss, and tears in her eyes. She was so scared of what our parents might say to her, and she was mortified to see me staring at her like that, knowing what she had done.

I pulled the same –you’re seven years old come here finger call—at her, and she came obediently to my side. “You peed your pants,” I pointed at her obvious mistake. She had nodded at that time.

“You know I’m your big brother, and you can tell me anything, and no matter how shameful or embarrassing, I’ll listen, and not judge you until I know all the facts, right?”

She had nodded the same way I did just now with her.

“Well, why did you piss your pants, sis?” I asked trying to speak to her like she was a big girl despite the evidence before me.

“I… I was on the bus home, and I… I couldn’t hold it,” she said teary-eyed.

“So, you are telling me you had no bathroom available, and it was an emergency?” I asked her.

She had nodded.

I still had never told a soul about that incident. It was one of the reasons she felt safe telling me about everything that happened, when I was James. It was probably the single reason she felt so betrayed by what my counter had done to her. I wanted so much to pay that bastard back for doing this to my sister, but I had no idea of who it really was, or how I was going to figure it out.
I sat in the chair next to her, though, for now, and I just took in the comfort that she was safe, and that she was keeping Robyn safe despite her own problems with that sorry for an excuse brother she currently had. I was nearly falling asleep.

The doorbell sounded which brought me right awake. I looked up into the kitchen waiting to see who mom brought down into the living room, now standing up from where we had been comfortable together. It was my body coming down the steps.

“Stop right there,” I said to that jerk. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“Robyn!” the mother came behind him looking shocked at me.

“Mom, he hurt Katie!” I almost said my sister, and I’m not so sure my Uncle and mom didn’t see me changing words in mid flow. But that creep had caught on. I know he did, because his eyes went very wide just moments before I changed the sound of my words.

“I’m sorry,” the boy-like creature said. I wasn’t sure if he was a boy at this point or not, but I was sure that whatever it was, even if it was a girl, I would do whatever it took to make them pay for what they did to Katie.

“Look what you did to Katie!” I said furious. “You should be protecting her!” My face was red.

“Robyn,” Uncle Jack tried to calm me. “He’s only here to say he’s sorry. He’s going now, right James?”

The boy nodded.

“He better go, and if I ever catch him around my… around Katie ever again, he’ll be sorry!”

A nervousness was inside me, and I shook all over. When I looked over at Katie, she looked more startled at me, than even at the intruder that was supposed to be her brother. It made sense though. She trusted James, and she probably forgave him the moment he said he was sorry, but I didn’t believe that person was really sorry. I think our parents put him up to apologizing.

“Robyn,” Katie said trying to draw me back to where she was. “Don’t be so hard on James. Maybe he’s had a lot of stress or something.”

I could remember having a lot of stress many times in the past, but I’d never taken it out on Katie. True enough, I imagined beating up a couple of boys over it, but I never went through with it, and besides, those boys were my age, and could have handled themselves. Katie is much smaller than James’s body, and she was his sister! I was her brother! It was James’s body’s job to protect his sister no matter what! I felt disgusted at my body for obeying that creep’s commands and putting her like this.

“Robyn,” Katie could see the tension in my face. “Please let it go. It won’t do you any good, and I’m safe right now, in your house, okay?”

I finally took solace in that, and I felt my hands relax. My face relaxed, and then my heart slowed, and finally, I fell to the floor where I was, and sat Indian style, thinking about all that had happened. I looked up at my stunned mother and Uncle Jack, and with puppy eyes, I looked up at them.

“I’m sorry,” I said sweetly. “I know I shouldn’t say words like… f… like that word,” I could feel a kind of guilt coming across my face, and I could feel tears stinging my eyes. I was sorry, but I had not expected to cry over the apology.

Mom went and scooped me into her arms, I crawled willingly the rest of the way into her, and I cried my head against her chest.

“I wouldn’t have let him in here, if I knew he was going to upset you that much, Lucy,” Uncle Jack suddenly said the name of the other person that was supposed to be inside Robyn. “I just thought his sister had a right to hear his apology.”

I nodded but kept my head buried into mom’s chest. I was shaking a little bit.

Katie made to move, and Uncle Jack reacted before she could get out of the chair, and picked her up.

“Katie, do you want to join the hug?” he asked her as he carried her closer to where I was holding on to the mom.

“Yes,” she said. “I don’t want Robyn to think I didn’t appreciate her feelings on the matter. I really do.”

I felt Katie wrap her arms around me, and she whispered in my ear. “Lucy, you are safe now. It’s okay. Robyn, you can come back out. It’s safe, I promise.”

I turned to face her, for the first time, really appreciating how mature she really was. She understood this MPD much better than I had. How much had Robyn and she talked about it? Was Lucy really inside me? Is that why I really wet my pants earlier, and now, why if felt so good to be hugged by this strange mom, and my sister as if she were the older one of us?

I blushed. “I’m back now, everyone, honest. I don’t need the hugs anymore.”

I stood up, and looked at all of their astonished faces. Even Katie’s face was a little stunned.

“Did I say something wrong?” I asked the room at large.

No one said anything, but mom got up and walked back towards the kitchen. Uncle Jack put Katie back in the chair, and then he held out a hand towards me. I looked up at him not quite understanding.

“Go on,” Katie assured me. “I’m fine for now.”

I took Uncle Jack’s hand and walked up the steps towards my room again. When we got to the top, he bend down and whispered to me much like he had when I peed my pants earlier.

“Angela,” he said. “I know you don’t like the hugs, but honestly, Robyn needs them sometimes, and you are not helping by interrupting moments where Robyn is just getting comfortable with something she needs. I’ve told you before not to interfere in situations like this.”

“It’s not fair,” I found myself saying. “Why can’t I have what I need too?”

“Angela, you can have what you need, when it’s appropriate. You are selfish, and because of you, Dr. Cobbs hasn’t gotten anywhere with Robyn in the last two months. You are the one that made Robyn forget to use the toilet the last time at the doctor’s office, aren’t you?”

“So? Who cares if it was me?”

“I care, because you are only one part of Robyn, and Robyn is scared of something. That’s why Lucy keeps shrinking back and then causing embarrassing problems for her.”

“Well, if Lucy would just grow up a little, and if Robyn would just quit accepting hugs all the time from people that don’t mean it!”

“Angela, everyone in this house means it, when they hug Robyn.”

“I see, so you just don’t mean it, when it’s Lucy or me, right?”

“I’m not saying that at all, Angela. You are a part of Robyn, are you not?”

“No, I’m not Robyn at all!”

Uncle Jack sighed.

I wanted to break through and tell Uncle Jack that I wasn’t saying anything that Angela was saying, but I couldn’t get my mouth to move with my own will. Dang it, Robyn, why didn’t you take your MPD problems with you? This is the most awkward part of you yet!

Angela seemed to sneer at me.

“By the way, the person inside here isn’t eve Robyn right now,” Angela informed Uncle Jack. “Robyn has been missing since three days ago! I don’t know how it happened, but this person is really James.”

Uncle Jack looked at me as if he was studying Angela. Was he trying to see if she was lying or if she was high on something? Whatever it was he was looking for, something must have hit a nerve, because he released me, and he shook his head.

“Angela, go take a break. I mean it.”

I finally felt Angela’s presence shrinking into the background, and I found my voice again. I stuttered for a moment, and then I coughed, and then I finally called out. “Uncle Jack?”

“Robyn,” he said. “You really are different from Robyn, aren’t you?”

I nodded.

“You think you are James for real, and that’s why you were upset when that intruder came into our house and you wanted to tear him apart for picking on your sister, right?”

I nodded. “I AM James.”

“I see. James, please go in the room and wait a minute. I have to talk to mom and to Katie about this.”

“No, not Katie,” I said. “She’s scared of James right now. I don’t want her to be scared of me, too.”

“She won’t be, baby.”

“How do you know?” I asked. “Have you ever been a girl?”

He frowned. I struck a nerve. Actually I didn’t know if it was any different for a girl than a boy, to be honest, but I used the one thing that he knew I had been asking about since we met. It made him pause.

“Alright,” he said. “I still have to talk to your mother about your new personality. I thought we had finished discovering your personalities, and had stopped new ones from forming.”

“It’s not a personality,” I said with a whine. “I’m really James!”

He walked out of the room, and I laid in the bed thinking.

Mom came up a few minutes later, and she sat on the bed with my Uncle on the other side of me, I was sandwiched between them.

“Robyn, it’s okay. James, we understand your need to protect your sister from the intruder that has taken over your body,” mom said. “But right now, the best thing to do, is to let Robyn play with Katie until we figure out what to do about the intruder, and about getting you back where you belong. You come out tomorrow, too, and talk to Dr. Cobb for us, okay?”

I looked up at them a little confused. I wanted to let Robyn come out, but I didn’t know how, or I’d just swap bodies for a few hours so that Robyn, the real one, could play with my sister. I knew that she was a black girl right now, living in some kind of horrid place where people were mean to her. But I would put up with it, if it was something I could do to make my sister happy.

I didn’t realize it, but I was now, pretty wiped out. I felt my eyes blurring, and the spacy like black was dragging me through a dream. Uncle Jack’s face was the last thing I had seen, and then I woke up, sitting on the floor by the table.

This wasn’t Robyn’s dining room. It was far too fancy for that! It wasn’t my house either. What happened? I looked down at my hands, and saw that they were brown and not white at all. I looked down at my legs, and they were bare expect for a pair of purple panties. My chest was covered, at least, in a white t-shirt.

I looked up at the table, and I saw a rather large family gathered around it, six children and two parents, all happily eating and chatting. I saw strange men and women coming and feeding them all kinds of delicious looking foods, and then I looked down at the dishes before me, and I saw corn break with white beans poured over it. I frowned.

I didn’t mind eating beans, but what the rest of the family was eating smell so much better. Dipped a fork into the bowl in front of me, and pulled it to my mouth. I was on my knees, and one hand was on the floor for balance as I pulled the beans and corn bread to my mouth.

Yes, things were worse for this girl than they were for Robyn. She was made to eat on the floor like an animal? What the hell was this? I knew somehow, that complaining was a terrible idea. My back felt sore, not just from bending over in the awkward position of eating, but also stung as if I had been thrown into a searing fire, and then rescued again before I could burn alive.

Whatever it was that was playing with our heads and bodies, I really wanted it to stop! Then, I realized something. That meant that maybe the body that had that creep in it, maybe it was now occupied by someone a little kinder, and someone that would protect Katie instead of hurt her. I hoped that Robyn went back to the right body though. Katie needed her best friend right now.

“Olivia, what are you doing down there?” a man with a red moustache looked down at me. “Are you eating?”

I nodded.

“Good. Don’t waste any of that food, or you’ll miss breakfast in the morning, understand?”

I nodded.

He went back to talking to the people at the table.

Slowly, I ate everything up that they had put in front of me, not that it seemed like it was that much. When I finished, I stood there on my knees and pulled up at some woman’s skirt.

“What is it, Olivia?” a woman with yellow hair looked down at me. I waved to my bowl.

“Olivia is finished eating,” she announced at the table.

“Go take your dish to the kitchen, then come back and stand right here,” the man with a red moustache told me.

I nodded and picked up my bowl, and then looked carefully at all the doorways leading out of the dining room. There were six of them. I made a guess and started to walk, unstopped, luckily, right into the kitchen where I saw other black women working. One of them took my bowl.

“Did the master ask you to do anything?” she asked me as I looked down at the floor.

“Yes, he said to go back and stand next to him after you take my bowl,” I said.

“You better go and do as he says then,” the woman said.

I nodded and walked back to the dining room as fast as I could and now that I was standing, I saw three boys and a girl sitting around the table with their parents. One of the boys seemed as tall as his father, and spoke rather maturely, then I realized who he was! He was one of the popular kids at my school, and some said, a womanizer though I had never caught him mistreating any of our classmates.

“Olivia,” the boy called Ralph called to me.

“Yes sir?” I asked looking from Ralph to the man who nodded at me.

“Is my room clean?”

“I don’t know sir,” I said honestly.

“Then don’t you think you better go make sure it is?” he asked. “I have a girlfriend coming over in a bit, and I want to talk to her privately.”

“Sir, don’t you think the family entertainment room would be more relaxing?” I asked feeling like Ralph might be up to something with that girl.

“No, I don’t think the family room would be more relaxing,” he said. “Do you want me to teach you another lesson in obedience?”

That threat made me shake a little in fear, though I didn’t know what he would do. His father seemed to just sit there, and talk like this, as if he approved of what his son was doing, and even more interesting, the mother just sat there, just as quiet.

I walked out of the kitchen, and approached the steps that went up to the top of the balcony. I had no idea of what bedroom was Ralph’s, but I knew where Olivia slept. I walked into her room instead, and glanced around for some kind of hints about where to find things. If Robyn had been stuck in a strange place, and was beaten for not following orders, then surely she had made notes somewhere, and yes, just my luck, I looked under the bedding, since her diary had been under her mattress in her real room, and I found a map of the house, and it had Ralph’s room clearly labeled. I ran back down stairs and to the back of the house where his room was.

I peered inside, and I was amazed at how large it was. A full sized living room set was in one area of the giant room, a full bedroom set with a twin bed and three dressers was in another side of the room, and there was still enough room for a large table and eight chairs and a small bar near the window. This boy had it all!

I didn’t know what to do first. The bed was made, the floor looked shiny, and it really looked as though it was as clean as a room could possibly get.

Not long after I had wandered into this giant room, and stood amazed in the center of it all, Ralph came in on me, and he looked a little agitated.

“Olivia, what are you doing?”

“Trying to decide what you want me to clean first, sir,” I cried in surprise.

“You do not shout,” he told me firmly. “Come here.”

I walked over to him, and he fixed my hair up a little.

“You look a mess,” he said. “You really should take better care of yourself.”

“Yes sir,” I said somewhat wanting to snipe at him about how it was his family’s fault because of the way I was treated.

“Have you had a bath yet today?” he asked.

“No sir,” I ventured thinking that it was unlikely given the way I was treated.

“Well, you certainly need a bath before my girlfriend comes over, and you need to put on some jeans and t-shirt, too. I can’t have her thinking you go around in panties all the time, you know.”

I nodded, though I suspected that this Olivia probably did go around in panties much more than she was allowed to be dressed.

Ralph took my hand and brought me through to his own private bathroom just off from his room. “Now,” he said pointing at the bathtub.
Then he closed the door.

I was glad he at least closed the door for me. I pulled off my shirt, and found a very absent bulge in my chest area. It was like I was still a little girl or something. Embarrassed, I pulled down my panties, and saw that the hair was just barely coming in, but something even more unexpected, I saw girl stuff in my panties. I got scared and threw them across the giant bathroom where they hit the far wall and slide down to the floor.

I got into the bath, the water still filling it up, and I relaxed in the warm sudsy water. Not more than a few minutes after I had settled, the bathwater now high enough to cover my stomach, Ralph came back in with a wash cloth and some clean clothes for me.

“Wash yourself good,” he said to me like I was five. “And then I want you to wear these clothes. If you are any longer than an hour, I’ll be in here, and to your embarrassment, dressing you, understand?”

I nodded.

He then let closing the door once more.

Not intent on wasting any time, I started to wash myself off starting with my shoulders and neck. Even though I was really a boy, and felt like I should be past this idea of being seen in girl bodies and even trying to think of them as just dolls or something that I happen to be inside of for the moment, I still couldn’t feel anything but embarrassment when other people saw me naked.

I washed as quickly as I could, but when I reached down to clean my butt and privates, I was sickened at what the washrag had pulled out. I knew that I was having girl troubles in Olivia’s body, but worse than that, when I washed the butt, there was actually a poop smear on the wash cloth. Didn’t Olivia know how to wipe her butt when she pooped? Dang it, girl!

I finished wiping the sick stuff off of me while standing in the tub and then I tried to wash the cloth out so that the humiliating evidence would be gone. Then I went to the clothes and started to see what he had provided for me to wear.

There was a pair of power puff panties. Not too bad. I slipped them up my legs. He wanted me to be a little girl, okay. Judging by what I saw, I don’t think Olivia was in high school, anyway. Then I pulled on a cute pony shirt with a white horse looking back at its observer, you, on black. There was a nice little pink skirt that was made of jean material. I pulled it up, and noticed that he bottom of it was just past my hips so that my panties was covered, but only just.

Ralph either wanted to see my panties for some reason when I bend over, or this was the most decent they let Olivia dress in this house. Whatever, it wasn’t me, and I only had to put up with it for a few hours, until I gave Robyn and Katie some time together.

The door came open the moment I had fixed my skirt as decent as it could be made.

“Good, you finished dressing,” he said then going to the bathtub to look at the water and the cloth. “Olivia, come here,” he said when he got there.

“Yes sir?”

“Did you wipe your ass?” he asked me.

I looked up at him with a stunned glaring look.

“I asked a question,” he seemed to fail to see how angry I was at his question. “Do I have to pull your panties down and wipe your butt for you?”

I shook my head no.

“If you have poop in those panties later, when I check, you are going to get it, girl,” he said. “So, if you didn’t wipe enough, you better tell me right now before the poop has a chance to get on those panties.”

“I cleaned myself in the bath, I promise.”

“Then why is this rag so clean?” he asked showing me how nearly devoid of poop it was.

“I got embarrassed and washed it out, sir,” I said.

“So, you are finally growing up enough to feel embarrassed by your body?” he asked.

“Yes sir.”

“Good. I was getting tired of finding your poop rags in the bathroom after your baths. Now, go in my room and wait on my bed, I’m going to pee.”

I lowered my head and walked to his bed as he had told me to do. When I turned to sit, I noticed he had walked to the far wall, the same one where I threw the dirty panties, and I started to blush really red.

He turned around.

“You are being a big girl right now, aren’t you?” he asked me.

I nodded nervously.

“You should have told me,” he said. Then he went to the toilet and let his snake pop out right in front of me as he drained it. I looked away in embarrassment. Even as a guy, I never purposely looked at other guys peeing.

He came back into the room with a wad of toilet tissue in his hand.

“Pull up your skirt.”

I hesitated.

“Now!”

I pulled it up and he pulled down my panties. He put the toilet paper in the front of my panties, and then stuffed some in the butt of my panties, and in the end, it felt like I was wearing a cloud inside the panties. Then he fixed them so they were up and ‘decent’ before pulling my skirt down for me.

“That better work until my guest leaves,” he told me. “If you leak anything out of your panties, pee, or whatever while my guest is here, I’ll get you whipped, understand?”

I nodded.

“Good, go stand over there by the television. She should be here in about ten minutes.”

I stood where he directed me. I felt my legs shaking, not because I was cold, but because I was nervous of what would happen if I didn’t do what he said. Thankfully, it was about this time, that the dream pulled me out of Olivia and felt myself going back to the other place. I woke up in the middle of the night at Robyn’s house, on the floor of the living room, sleeping by Katie.

I felt down at my panties, and was relieved that they were dry under what had become my usual pajama top, the long t-shirt that pulled down just long enough to hide my panties from anyone seeing. I curled up to Katie, put an arm protectively around her, and fell back to sleep.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter 9

I woke up the next morning, Katie settling in closer to me than the night before, and her thumb just in a resting space outside her mouth. I knew that posture, but feeling her thumb, I could see that she really was too old to actually suck it. It saddened me that she didn’t feel safe enough to suck her thumb when she was stressed out, but at the same time, I was proud of her for growing out of it. It had been so hard for her to outgrow.

I tried to lift my body up, but as I did, I noticed that her body was so close to me, that moving anymore, and I might as well wake her up. She was sleeping so peacefully, and I really didn’t want to have to wake her before my mom did so for school. I laid back down and pulled her head over me and whispered to her.

“I’m here now, sis. No one is going to hurt you while I’m here.”

“I know,” she whispered back in her sleep.

Suddenly, I felt her body quiver and then warmth spread over my stomach and down my legs and around me. My sister was peeing the bed, like she had done about two years ago. I think that was the last time she had peed herself. I felt a little funny, her urine flowing over my body, especially since it was a girl body, but I still found it hard to push on her to wake her up. I didn’t want her to get scared.

I finally got her pushed away enough that I could get out from under her, and miraculously, enough so without her waking up. I went upstairs and knocked on mom’s door. When mom saw my condition after turning on the light, I answered her before she said anything.

“Katie,” I said. “I think she was just so tired and maybe hurt so bad, that she couldn’t wake up in time. I’m scared when she wakes up, she’s going to freak out at what happened.”

“Alright,” mom told me. “You go get a shower, Uncle Jack and I will take care of your friend.”

I nodded and went towards the bathroom, feeling a little dribble of my own starting. I got into the bathroom and sat on the toilet as fast as I could, and I realized that if it had not been for Katie wetting, mom would have found another pair of wet panties on me.

I washed Robyn’s body thoroughly making sure to get everywhere so there would be no surprises. After what had happened with Olivia, I didn’t want to take any chances. Robyn was counting on me to take care of her body while she was being Olivia. Poor little Olivia! If Robyn had been going thought this longer than me, then no wonder her mind was so split apart! Poor Robyn!

Once I was finished, I walked out of the bathroom, and saw that Uncle Jack was gently holding Katie and rocking her, her head hiding against his shoulder, and him whispering softly.

“It’s alright, Katie. You couldn’t have gotten up here on your own anyway, so even if you were awake, it would have just made it worse for you, darling.”

I smiled. Uncle Jack really was a nice person when he had to be understanding.

Katie still sobbed, and to my surprise, both my mom and Uncle Jack insisted that my sister needed help, and they took her right into the bathroom, probably to give her a bath. It was certain that they were not to get the cast wet, so I wasn’t sure how they would manage that feat, but more interested in giving my sister at least a gesture of privacy, I left them to it.

Nearly half an hour later, Katie was put back in my Uncle’s favorite Chair, dressed for school. Mom was in the kitchen making something for breakfast, and Uncle Jack was cleaning out the carpet with some cleaner, where she had peed herself.

I sheepishly looked over at her a few times, and finally got up and went to sit by her. I pulled her towards me, and I whispered. “I won’t tell anyone at school, I promise.”

She smiled at me.

When my uncle looked up after cleaning the floor, I whispered. “Uncle Jack, I think mom wants Lucy to come out when I visit the doctor today.”

He nodded.

“Do you know what that means?” I asked him.

“I’ll make sure I pick you up from school if your mom doesn’t have a chance, and I’ll have a change of clothes with me in case something goes wrong at the clinic,” he said.

I nodded.

Wait, did I just ask Uncle Jack to prepare for me to pee my pants like a toddler? I mulled that request over a couple of times, and then looked at Katie for a second to see what she thought of what had been said, but it seemed she had not really paid attention. The sullen look on her own face, made me realize that she was still worried that I thought she was a baby or something because of last night.

I leaned into her. “Katie, you peed yourself when you were twelve years old, remember?”

She looked at me dumbfounded.

“I told you I was James,” I said. “Now, does mom and dad know about that incident?”

She shook her head no.

“Does anyone else you know of know of that other than this body that I’m now sharing with Robyn?”

She shook her head no.

“And no one is going to find out, either, just like no one at school will find out that you had an accident in your sleep. You’re my baby sister, and I would never tell anyone something that embarrassed you so badly.”

She looked at me for a long time, then she wrapped her arms more profoundly around me. She whispered my name: “James.”

“We can’t let on that you know I’m James though,” I warned her. “If they find out that you think I’m James, they’ll have you seeing a shrink, too.”

“Then, you know all about Robyn,” Katie said. “She says she can’t help it when the others force themselves out. What do you think?”

“I know she can’t,” I said. “Yesterday, when I was being hugged because Lucy needed it, this other part came out, and she was really strong. She wouldn’t let me talk, and that’s why Uncle Jack took me up to the room, to keep that part from saying something that might have hurt your feelings. That part of Robyn is really strong, and seems to think it protects her from abuse. But honestly, this part of Robyn doesn’t know abuse like the rest of Robyn is figuring out.”

“How do you know?”

“I took the real Robyn’s place for a short time last night, and hopefully, she came back here, to spend some needed time with my little sister. My sister needed a girl, who understood what being a girl was, to talk to. I understood that, and being a boy, I couldn’t give you that, so I tried to change places with Robyn. I only hope it worked.”

“I think it did,” Katie said. “There was something more familiar about Robyn for a few hours last night that had gone missing for a few days. I knew something was weird when she forgot to meet me the first day of school before school, but I know Angela can be controlling at times, and thought maybe it was Angela that stopped her coming.”

“Well, it was me. I just didn’t know anything about Robyn or even being a girl, so I had no idea you had plans to meet.”

Katie nodded. “That makes sense.”

“Please don’t tell anyone about me being in Robyn’s body at school, sis. It’s strange enough, and no, you won’t find me in the girls’ toilets. I have a deal with the nurse at the moment to go there.”

Katie smiled and seemed to breathe in relief.

I laughed and then she did.

“Looks like you got Katie smiling again,” Mom came back to get us for breakfast. “I fixed you girls some oats and toast with jam for this morning.”

“Sounds good, mom,” I said getting into my seat to eat.

Because of Katie’s situation, mom said she would stay with her, and Uncle Jack took me to school. There being nothing interesting to look forward to in the cafeteria, I went straight into the algebra classroom thanking the powers that be that this was the last day of school for the week.

“Well, well, well,” a voice interrupted my thoughts though no one else was in the room. “Finally, here we are, alone, and you with so many questions.”

I closed my eyes, imagining the voice to be gone.

“No, that’s not going to work,” the voice said maliciously. “You threw me out of your life nearly ten years ago,” the voice said. “That’s why I moved.”

“Moved?”

“Oh, come now, surely you remember me,” she said in a huff.

“No, I don’t. You are Robyn’s problem, not mine.”

“I was always your problem,” the girl seemed to smirk at me though she had no real image. “I was your first playmate when you were five years old, and you promised me, and I promised you, that we would never abandon each other.”

I rubbed my head, trying to understand.

“Still confused?” she asked me as she blurred out of focus and the first bell caused me to jump back to the present.

However, the present I jumped back to had nothing to do with first period algebra! I was in English class, and my arms were brown again. I was in a summer yellow dress, and I sat in what felt like an elementary school chair. Around me, kids were talking and getting books out to read.

“Olivia,” the teacher called me to her desk.

“Yes miss?” I stood up and walked up towards her desk, my legs shaking a little.

“Nicolas says you were saying things about people in the class again.”

“Nicolas is a lying twit,” I said noticing a very changeable structure to the way words came out of my mouth. “He always acts like he’s all that and then gets mad when people have something to say about it.”

“Well, what did Nicolas say to you?” the teacher asked me.

I shook my head. I didn’t know what he had said. I knew it wouldn’t matter because I was inferior to all these pigs in this room. I didn’t know why I knew that, but I did notice how they all looked down at me.

“You are lucky that the Johnsons have taken you in, young miss. If you keep causing them trouble, do you think they’ll let you keep staying there?”

I shook my head.

“Well, tell me what Nicolas did.”

“Nutt’in,” I said getting frustrated.

“Stand by my desk, and don’t move,” the teacher said looking as though she would like nothing better than to smack my mouth.

I stood there, and waited.

The teacher went to the front of the class, and after everyone had books to read, she led the class. Only I was standing by her desk, no book in hand. All I could do, is listen.

“So,” the voice that belonged to Angela interrupted again. “Don’t you remember this scene? You had told the teacher that I had been the one that was causing all the trouble, so you stopped talking to me after a similar situation. You have a choice, to once again, abandon me and make life hell for your sister and her friend, or you can come back to me, and be my friend again, as Olivia. What will you do?”

“As Olivia?” I asked now my eyes closing as I concentrated on this voice.

“Yes, as Olivia. If you become Olivia, and you stay my friend this time, I’ll let Olivia be you, and she is not cruel to your sister, but I am. I can force Olivia to take the back seat while I continue to hurt your sister if you press me, and you will be Robyn, so you will always know what I’m doing, and you will be Olivia sometimes, just so you can be reminded that you could have prevented the hurt to your sister. What do you want to do?”

I sighed. It was Angela?

“Yes, it was me. I bet you wanted to know how I did it.”

I had to admit, I was curious, but right now, the more important thing on my mind, was how to keep Angela from making good on her promises and causing more pain for sis and her friend.

“So you are saying if I start playing with you again as Olivia, the torture to my sister stops?”

“That’s right,” she said.

“But I still don’t even know how to be a girl. How can I be Olivia? I don’t even know anything about her.”

“I can teach you. You will soon know everything, and if you are a really good girl, I’ll even let you visit your old body so you can check on your sister to see if I’m keeping my word.”

“Fine. Do whatever it takes, just leave my sister alone.”

I know that this story ends a little abruptly, but I think it would be more fun to leave it to your own imaginations about who or what Angela really is. Have fun imagining Olivia’s new life.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

This story was going so well, and then you ended it like that? I’m sorry, but I can’t help but feel that this is a bit of a cop-out. So much is unexplained: how did the switch happen? If, as you implied, this isn’t the first time Robyn has switched with a stranger, how long has this body-swapping process been going on? How did Olivia become James in the first place?

I did enjoy this story quite a bit; your characters were, for the most part, believable and the storyline was novel enough to keep my interest even through your re-writes, but I can’t endorse what I see as such a weak ending.

That said, I don’t mean to insult or offend, just offer my opinion.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Your opinion is greatly appreciated because I knew that the ending was weak, but I was really unsure if the story was really that good. I had an image in mind, but I wasn’t so sure that image was coming across in a way that connected with people. Then I realized that I might have gotten in over my head, and once again, might have started something I couldn’t bring to an end.

My notes:
James is the one with MPD.
Robyn is his sister’s friend’s name, but because of his obsession with her, he dreams about her. Everything with Robyn was in his dreaming state. AS was with Olivia. Angela was his child-hood imaginary friend, who he imagined was angry at him for abandoning her. Olivia is a personification of his will, that if he could, he would suffer that some one else would be free of that suffering. Lucy is a personification of his shyness and vulnerability.

He wants to be protective of his sister, and he wants his sister to look up to him, thus it comes out in the dream as he hunts for the one that is hurting her, but it is all in a dream. Whether he really did protect her or help her in real life is supposed to be left ambiguous.

Sorry I didn’t know how to get these points in the story itself.

I am still working on trying to master that, so if you have any ideas about what I could do, to better bring out these points in the story, other than tell me that they are missing, I am all ears. I take no offense to constructive criticism. But I would like to have examples or ideas about how I could better show these ideas in the story, rather than just tell me they are missing. thanks

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

If I decided to pick this up, and decide that this chapter is not the final one, would that be okay with people here? I might have thought of more to the story, if people want it….

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

I think that would be a better option than to just leave it hanging like that.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Alright, I’ll get to work on adding more… because I did think a little bit about having James in Olivia for a little while, and then also have some body backs to Robyn at the same time, to answer some of those hard to answer questions at the moment.

Thank you so much for your help, WBDaddy, and I might have to ask your advice to get it going again, some.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

I was thinking that, since it’s so difficult to explain James’ situation as you laid it out while the reader is locked inside his head, you could have another character, like the psychiatrist, explain at least some of those points you mentioned, since Robyn was scheduled to go back there anyway.

If that’s a bad way to go about it, I understand, but like you said, I should be able to offer a solution as well as point out problems.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

I was following this story as well, despite your ability to stick with a decision once you posted a chapter. However, I think in the end that you just made the story seem disjoined. I was willing to suspend disbelief for a body switch, but then switching bodies with someone with MPD and then going to the character having MPD him/herself seemed to be a bit too much. CS Fox managed to do something similar with The Girl in My Closet, but it didn’t throw all this other stuff in at once.

Your explanation for ending the story like this sort of made the story “jump the shark.” I don’t buy how your are going to get to that conclusion to the point that I don’t want to read the story anymore.

Your writing is pretty decent, so I hope you write more stories and even similar stories, but I really don’t enjoy stories that require the viewpoint character to be insane. I am sane, so putting myself into the head of an insane character doesn’t really work for me the way you think it would. I can handle an unreliable narrator, but usually you get hints that clue you in to their unreliability. I don’t just want that to be told to me at the end. That’s almost as bad as “it was only a dream stories.”

I admit that I wrote an insanity story and won a contest with it, but I executed it better while leaving hints along the way.

Please write and post another story. You have talent, but you need practice and writing something new usually provides more experience than writing the same thing over and over.

Sorry I went a little long winded and sorry if I was too mean. I’m am giving constructive criticism.

Re: Robyn- Rewrite: I think this is a much better story now

Chapter 10
I could feel something different about Angela at that moment, something about her seeming to slip away from me, and I was left alone as my own person. I shook for a moment, thinking, ‘was this what I really wanted?’

I was pulled back to Olivia’s world as the teacher seemed to look right at me, and called for me to give a response to a question that I had not been paying attention to.

“Olivia,” the teacher yelled at me. “Do you even know what the question is?”

I shook my head, being honest.

“So you were daydreaming again, weren’t you?”

I nodded.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do with you, girl. You know I don’t really want to tell your masters what kind of naughty little dirty girl you’ve been today, but honestly, how can I not tell them after everything that has happened?”

I felt tears stinging my eyes. It had not been my fault. I had only just taken the body just moments before. I had no idea what Olivia or maybe it was Angela, had done while I was in Robyn’s body. I looked up at her with my very sad amber eyes and waited for her to tell me what she was going to do to me.

“Sit on the floor,” she told me. “If you are too tired to study, then sit down, and I don’t want to hear a word from you for the rest of the day. If you fall asleep, then all the better.”

I did notice that I was quite sleepy, actually. There was no telling if this was because Olivia was always tired, or if it was because of my personal spiritual activities since I had been too busy spying on other people when I was supposed to be sleeping. Maybe that had served me right.

My head fell forward, and I started to doze during the class. No one woke me up until the end of the day, and I was so exhausted that I didn’t notice the change of classes or the feeling of the afternoon wearing on until the teacher shook me lightly.

“Olivia, honey,” she smiled as he shook me a little rougher. “Your family is out in the hall waiting to collect you. Get up, honey.”

I came reluctantly out of my sleep, and stood up brushing myself off.

“Can I have the homework?” I asked her as politely as I could.

“You know I never give you homework,” the teacher replied. “If you want homework, you need to talk to your owners and get them to give me permission to give it to you.”

I nodded and walked by the desk that was probably mine, almost leaving my coat until the teacher called my attention to it. Grabbing my coat off the back of the chair, I walked out of the room and found myself facing that blond kid that really boiled my blood from inside.

“Well, Olivia, have we been a good girl in class today?” he asked me.

“No sir,” I responded thinking it was probably better to be truthful. “I made the teacher upset twice.”

“What did you do?” he asked me looking into my eyes, his green daring ones pushing their silent threat silently into my soul.

“I don’t really know,” I looked down shaking.

He went into the room shutting it so I was outside, and he talked with her for several minutes. I looked up and down the hall, feeling alone, isolated, and as if I didn’t belong outside the room on my own. There was a foreboding ghost in the hall, that kept slipping past me again and again, and though I could not hear it, I could feel its cold presence as it slipped its body through me again and again, almost as if it enjoyed it when I had ice chill down my back each time.

Finally, Ralph exited the classroom, and he yanked on my hair causing me to follow him as he took me towards the exit of the school.

“Ralph,” I whispered.

“What?” he asked sounding quite unpleasant at hearing me speak.

“Can I go to the bathroom before we leave?” I asked.

“And how am I supposed to watch you when you go into a public black toilet?” he asked sounding like it was a stupid question. “I’ve told you before, if you have to pee, you go before the end of class, or you go at home, not waiting for me to collect you and then mentioning it just as we are leaving the school.”

I nodded.

“I guess that since you are asking, it’s pretty bad then?”

I shook my head.

“So, you thought you’d embarrass me by asking when it isn’t even an emergency?” he yelled at me making me shiver as if that same ghost had passed through me again. “How stupid are you, girl? You know what I’ll do if you embarrass me!”

“I’m sorry. I mean to be embarrassing you, mastah,” I said trying to be as subservient as possible. “I’ll wait till we get home.”

“The hell you will,” he said looking around the schoolyard for something. “You will be soaked to the bone by the time we get home, or you will get it,” he said finally picking up a light branch that had fallen from a nearby willow tree.

“I… okay…I…,” I really didn’t know how to respond to that. There was no way I’d pee my pants like that, regardless of what Olivia normally did. I was only in Olivia’s body because of Angela, and if I had to live this life, one thing I was not going to live through, was peeing myself like a baby every day.

Ralph kept hold of the branch, and I eyed it nervously, but still, I kept from peeing the panties that Olivia had obviously been allowed to wear at school. I was happy that they at least let her dress to go to school because the experience from the other day told me that she was probably kept in as little as possible when at home.

Angela seemed to appear, right in front of me, rather than in my head. Now, that she was there, I remembered her quite well. She had the same shiny blond hair that came to the middle of her back, and she was wearing blue jeans and a white blouse. She smiled at me, and I smiled back at her, unable to help myself.

“What are you smiling about?” Ralph cut across the air, his voice chilling me once again. “Did you understand what I said earlier? If you arrive home, without so much as a puddle between your legs, you are going to get it. You embarrassed me, and I’m not going to put up with that unless you really have to go badly enough to obey me in this.”

“I… I don’t really have to go that badly,” I was stuttering. “Can’t you just spank me or something?”

“Spank you?” he asked swinging that branch through the air. “I could, but it won’t be enough. You were really bad to embarrass us both like that, and the only way I can accept your apology is for you to prove to me it was so bad you couldn’t keep your big mouth shut. Maybe I should help it along?”

He grinned evilly.

“How… how are you going to help… Ye—ow!” He swung that branch at my legs, and it hurt so much, it felt like he had swung a razor strap at me.

“I said to obey me,” he said. “I’ll keep slapping your legs with this until you do if you keep holding off on purpose.”

“I’m not disobeying you on purpose,” I said my eyes watering up. “I really don’t need to pee that badly.”

“But you went and embarrassed me like you had to,” he insisted. “Why else would you say it unless you really thought you had to go so badly? Do you want me to tell your whole class that you pee the bed all the time?”

“No?” I whined at him.

“Then do as you are told. Now.”

“Won’t I get in trouble at home for peeing myself?” I asked him looking up at him with shining eyes. So either way, I’ll get in trouble, but this way, I can stay dry if I just let you hit me?"

He thought about it for a second, or so I thought he was thinking about it, and just as I was about to smile in triumph, he whacked me again in surprise. I think he thought the surprised would cause me to leak by accident, but it only made me jump.

“We’ll see how much trouble you get in at home if you don’t obey me.”

Angela whispered to me, though if I were really this age again, I wouldn’t have known how she could do that, I probably wouldn’t have cared either. “You better do as he says.”

I looked over at her, tears streaming down my face.

“If you disobey him, you’ll get in much more trouble than if you pee yourself even if it was because you failed. I’ve been with Olivia for a long time, and I know what he is capable of doing to you.”

Angela was quite a character, trapping me in this situation in the first place, but something sad in her face made me think that she really didn’t want ME to get hurt, well, not that way, whatever it was that Ralph had waiting at home for me.

“Just pee your pants,” Angela whispered at me.

“Just pee your pants,” Ralph echoed her whisper just before slapping my legs again with the willow branch.

“Alright, alright, alright,” I called at him. “Just stop walking for a minute and stop swinging that thing. Please?”

“Are you going to piss your pants?”

I nodded.

“Fine, let me see. If you do it before I count to ten, I won’t hit you anymore.”

I started to squat down.

“Did I tell you to squat down?” he asked. “Stand up and put your legs together and cross them so it looks more like an accident then you doing it on purpose.”

I stared at him for a minute.

“You heard me, girl, or do you want dad to punish you for peeing yourself on purpose?”

I shook my head no.

“Good, stand up, at least a little more than you are, and close your legs together and stuff and pee while dancing like you can’t hold it.”

I looked over at Angela, and when she nodded, I closed my legs and tried to do what he said wondering what on earth he was trying to do to me. What was this?

“He is teaching you to be his naughty little baby,” Angela finally informed me. “He likes to watch girls pee their pants, by accident, preferably, but he is trying to hide that interest from his family. Last year, he asked his dad again and again for his own personal servant to take care of his room, and finally, his dad bought you for him.”

“He didn’t buy me. He bought Olivia,” I whispered.

“Same thing,” Angela said shrugging.

I looked up at Ralph, who had just said seven!

“Wait! I’m doing it!” I cried out trying to press myself to do what he wanted.

“Keep trying because you aren’t even a little damp,” he said coldly. “You are about to, eight, get another slap on the legs or maybe back this time.”

“Please,” I pleaded.

“Nine!”

I pushed as hard as I could, even pushing in on my stomach with my fingertips, trying to get my bladder to push. I was really scared he was going to do something worse if I didn’t go soon.

“Te…” he started just as I felt a squirt. But it was too late because I had waited until the last minute, and he still couldn’t see anything wet. He slapped my back really hard, and then I started to pee uncontrollably, in the position he had requested so it went not straight down my legs, but all over my legs and around my butt making me soaked everywhere.

“Finally,” Ralph said throwing the stick away. “Now that you’ve finally done what you were told, I won’t need this anymore. But don’t think I won’t find another one if you get stubborn. Now, stand up and let’s walk home.”